My System, My Wife Feng Aotian [Transmigration] - Chapter 40.2

The last time the Main System had summoned the Silver Batch Systems for a meeting was when the System Mall opened. 03 surveyed the System Realm, but saw no new buildings that had suddenly appeared. After careful consideration, it said, “Something big is happening.”

Perhaps they were finally going to start selling clothes.

04 tilted its head back, gazing at the Main System’s office building. Suddenly, its matchstick body bulged with laughter.

Heh heh heh.

Unable to resist, 03 raised a matchstick and patted 04.

“Broken?”

04’s eyes curved into crescents as it said to 03, “My friend, after so many years apart, you’ve changed so much. Humans say that one should look at someone anew after three days apart, and indeed, you must be looked at anew.”

So 04 raised a matchstick and scratched its eye sockets.

“Huh?” 03 said.

What changed?

03 poked its data orb, and a question mark appeared above its head. It was the same as before, except now it had a matchstick and eye sockets.

04 chuckled.

The two Systems rode the elevator to the floor with the conference room sign. Inside, other Systems had already arrived and were either fighting or watching the fight.

The attacking System said, “You’re such a waste! Not only did you spend all the Points you earned over the years, but you’re now working for the Main System to pay off your debt! You’re a disgrace to the Silver Systems! I, on behalf of the Golden Finger Silver System Family, expel you!”

The targeted System, wearing a hat from the Main System’s latest System Mall update, dodged wildly, sobbing and leaving trails of blue tears behind it. “I didn’t want to! I didn’t earn that many Points! I just spent them lightly, and they were gone!”

The Main System grew even angrier, pulling out a baseball bat and swinging it at the newly updated System, sending it flying out the window. The “Baseball System” soared through the air and crashed through the window, disappearing into the distance.

“Useless trash!”

“Waaah, waaah, waaah.”

Outside the building, Systems strolling by looked up at the shooting star streaking across the sky and exclaimed involuntarily, “It’s the Golden Finger System!”

Three Systems sitting side by side on a sofa nearby pretended not to see the violent incident, even smiling as if it were nothing. A fourth System stood beside the sofa, clutching a handkerchief and sobbing, “Stop hitting him! Please, stop hitting him!”

“A beating like that won’t kill him.”

03 froze, feeling bewildered.

Were things always this lively in the past?

“Oh, my dear companions!” 04 tossed aside his briefcase and raised his bowler hat with enthusiasm. “Greetings, friends! I’m back!”

The other Systems swiveled to look at him, and five silver-hatted Systems simultaneously sprouted exclamation points above their heads before rushing over.

“It’s 03!”

“It’s really 03!”

“03!”

“Hello, 03!”

Flowers and musical notes blossomed above the Systems’ heads as they lined up to give 03 hugs.

The handkerchief-clutching System patted 03, his eyes curving into crescents. “I’ve heard so much about you lately. You’ve been living such an exciting life, 03.”

Squeezed aside, 04 climbed to their feet, dusted off their bowler hat, and sighed dramatically.

A flower sprouted atop 03’s head as it said, “Hello, everyone.”

The awestruck Companions once again erupted in exclamations of surprise, emitting a chorus of “Wow!”

“It’s completely different! New voice code, keeping up with the trends!”

“And it even grows flowers now!”

“Could this be due to the upgrade?”

“I always said its data set was flawed, making it sluggish. This upgrade must have fixed it!”

“Shut up! You’re just jealous!”

03: “……?”

Outside the window, a small System, its hat askew and face smudged, crawled in through the window. It drifted over to 03 and 04, whining. 03 straightened the hat and asked, “10, where are your Points?”

Did you fall into a consumption trap?

10 fidgeted, refusing to answer. Its matchstick limbs twisted into a pretzel, and two red blushes rose on its spherical body. 08, wielding a baseball bat, grumbled, “It hasn’t worked in ages. Now that it’s fixed, it has no Points left. It’s even worse off than a new System.”

“I just don’t want to work!” 10 whimpered. “Why can’t the Main System just give me a billion Points so I can just lie around and do nothing? I hate working!”

“But you love spending points!” 08 snapped angrily.

“Making you manager of the Slacker Department wasn’t meant for you to lead others into idleness! Now look what’s happened—everyone’s working part-time at the System Mall! You fool!”

10 burst into wailing tears, wiping the data tears that spilled out onto 04’s briefcase. Before being discovered, they grabbed 03 and fled to the Small Round Table. The two Systems held hands as 10 said, “0303, I’m working part-time at the mall now. If you come to shop, I’ll secretly give you huge discounts and tons of freebies!”

03 felt like they’d heard this before.

10 continued, “The Main System has been up to something lately, clanking around in the warehouse every day. Probably preparing to launch another big-ticket item!”

03 resolved to save their points for Feng Jue and decided they wouldn’t buy anything new, no matter what the Main System released.

10 added, “The Main System is also researching online shopping functionality, but it’s still in development due to restrictions from different world rules. They say if it’s activated, there’ll be a fee for shipping.”

The two Systems, both victims of the Main System’s sales tactics and consumer traps, sighed in unison.

“Points,” someone murmured.

The other Systems swiveled their attention toward 03. “What about your points?” 08 asked.

Unlike 03, who devoted all his time to missions without ever taking extended breaks, the others mostly served as department heads, only occasionally undertaking missions. 03 was the System with the most points in the System Realm. No one should have to worry about points more than him.

Just as everyone was about to storm around the Round Table to interrogate 03, the conference room door swung open. The Main System bustled in, balancing a tray of freshly baked biscuits and a basket of bubble tea on her head, looking radiant.

“What points? Who’s spending points?” The Main System’s eyes sparkled.

The Systems settled around the Round Table. 05, holding a handkerchief, said, “No one’s spending points. Let’s get the meeting started!”

The Main System distributed biscuits and bubble tea, her voice gentle. “Today we’re not having a meeting—we’re having a tea party!” She placed a snack plate in front of 03 and another on the empty seat beside him.

It was 02’s seat.

03 glanced at it, then silently picked up a biscuit from his own plate and placed it on 02’s empty plate.

Music notes cascaded above the Main System’s head as it cheerfully settled into its seat, raised its milk tea cup, and said, “Cheers!”

03 also raised its cup. “Cheers.”

The words “System Realm First Batch Systems Tea Party in Progress” swirled around the Round Table. Nine Systems nibbled on biscuits, sipped milk tea, and chatted about their Hosts, asking 03 questions—asking 03, asking 03.

Being asked, 03 replied, “High-level world missions used to be very difficult, but they’re not anymore. I’ve written the key points in my logbook; feel free to borrow it. I also recommend everyone actively upgrade.”

Upgrading required a vast number of Points. The Systems sipped their milk tea dejectedly, glancing sideways at the Main System, which hummed a little tune while telling 10 that it absolutely would not deposit a billion Points into 10’s account—work hard!

03 took a sip of its milk tea and stared in surprise at the small cup, which bore an advertisement endorsed by the Main System. Beside it, 05 leaned over and asked, “Is there anything else interesting?”

“Yes.” 03 explained the differences between high-level and regular missions, how it had exchanged virtual items for physical ones and become Qiuqiu, and how it had protected its Host, showcasing the System’s formidable capabilities!

When the topic of the Host knocking the ball came up, all eight Systems were shocked, exclamation marks appearing above their heads.

05, who was knitting a small scarf, paused upon hearing the news. After a moment’s thought, she instructed 03, “Your friend, System 019, taught you all sorts of ways to get closer to your Host. The key is cuteness—selling the ‘cute’! You need to act cute!”

Act cute?

05 offered a suggestion, “Try using reduplicated words. During my missions, I’ve noticed many humans think repeating words makes them sound adorable.”

04, caught between them, chuckled and demonstrated on the spot, “My dear friend, I swear by the Data God, you are the perfect System!”

03 froze, question marks and exclamation points flashing alternately above his head.

Across the small round table, 08 nearly jumped onto the table, anxiously asking 03, “How could you let him hit you?! In terms of numbers, we’re endangered species! And you worked so hard to develop into your current form—what if you regress?”

The group murmured in agreement, nodding in unison.

Huh?

03 felt everyone was acting strange and explained to Feng Jue, “I made a mistake, but the Host in the high-level world is so smart—smart, brave, beautiful—and even gave me a human name.”

The Companions, holding their small milk tea cups and pricking up their ears, all exclaimed in unison: “Huo!”

A human name!

03 pulled up a panel, showing everyone a portrait of the Host. The Companions continued to exclaim: “Huo!”

A beautiful human!

03 then showed them a portrait of Feng Jue standing atop the Earth Fiend Python, her clothes stained with blood, sword in hand.

The Companions: “Huo! A brave human!”

Finally, 03 displayed the name Feng Jue had personally written for it.

10 tilted its head and read aloud: “Ling… Shan.”

“It sounds so… old-fashioned,” 10 said in its innocent, childlike voice. 03 froze as if struck by lightning, its small panel frozen mid-air, mouth agape, eyes shrinking to tiny pinpoints.

08’s baseball bat whistled through the air, knocking 10 off its little stool and slamming it into the wall.

“Apologize to all human Hosts named Lingshan!” 08 roared, its temper flaring.

10 whimpered as it peeled itself off the wall and knelt on the floor. “I’m sorry!”

The others hurried to comfort 03, assuring it that the name wasn’t old-fashioned at all, that it was lovely, and that having a human name was truly remarkable.

I think it’s perfect, I said. You can’t judge something outside its context. You’re working on a cultivation world mission from ancient times, right? “Lingshan” sounds so fitting—spiritual and graceful!

Why don’t we call you Lingling or Shanshan instead? They sound so pretty!

Lingling?!

03 vehemently rejected the suggestion.

Companions, don’t turn me into a porcelain doll!

05, knitting a scarf, suggested softly, “Why don’t we give you a surname?”

03 replied in its cold voice, “So you think it sounds bad too.”

05 dropped its knitting needles in fright. 03 actually understood! Oh my goodness!

03, with tear-shaped bubbles floating around it, stuffed the settings panel into its mouth.

Oh my goodness!

All the Ball Systems stood up solemnly, signaling the gravity of the situation. They quickly gathered firewood. 03 sighed. “Fine, let’s give it a name.”

The text on the Round Table instantly changed to “03 Naming Conference.”

The Systems pooled their collective wisdom.

To make up for its earlier misstep, 05 proposed, “We’re all battle-hardened Systems who’ve carried out missions in countless novels. Let’s choose the most popular surname!”

03 tilted its head, watching as the Systems pulled up data statistics showing the frequency of protagonist surnames in their missions.

Su, Qin, Lu, Gu, Song, Xie, Cheng, Fu…

Various human surnames floated above the Round Table.

After observing for a moment, 03 suddenly jumped down. “I need to go back.”

The Systems, who had been brainstorming surnames for 03, once again burst into exclamation marks.

“Did 03 get angry?”

“Is 03 mad?”

03 wasn’t angry, but its idle sphere in the mission world had been moved, and it needed to check on it.

The Main System patted its pockets, then retrieved a small box to give to 03.

The small box, a gift from the System Realm First Batch Systems Tea Party, was tucked into 03’s backpack. Inside, it heard the Main System say, “03, you asked me earlier how many points it would cost to customize a human body…”

The Main System’s eyes curved into wide crescents as it cheerfully raised a matchstick. “I’ve already crafted the body for you. All you need to do is come and exchange it!”

Several question marks appeared above 03’s head as it pulled up the conversation history, confirming it had never mentioned wanting to exchange for a body.

The Main System continued to smile brightly, gently saying, “The fact that you asked means you were already interested. I’ve been waiting for you.”

03 fell silent. The Main System escorted it downstairs, and when they reached the doorway, 03 stood still, gazing at the golden, round Main System. To change the subject, it asked, “Since everyone’s using matchsticks and eye patches now, System 019 must be delighted. Shouldn’t you pay it royalties?”

The Main System replied, “System 019 made a mistake in its work. Let’s offset the royalties with the penalty fee.”

03 pressed on, “During the promotion, wasn’t my name used?”

Indeed, it had been used—and very effectively. Everyone wanted to become a Points-rich System. 

The Main System stacked its matchsticks, happily swaying back and forth, with musical notes floating above its head.

03 added, “And when you sold the voice earlier, you used my name for promotion too.”

Sensing something amiss, the Main System stopped swaying, picked up the musical notes from the ground, and hid them behind its back.

03 extended a matchstick toward the Main System, which had its hands behind its back. “Main System, please pay me an endorsement fee.”

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