My Straight Childhood Friend Successfully Pursued Me After The Breakup - Chapter 41.1

The memories of the past flashed through her mind in an instant, finally settling on that pitch-dark night, settling on Tao Ran’s retreating figure ten years ago.

At that time, would Zuo Xian have ever thought that ten years later, Tao Ran would be standing in front of her, humbly begging for her forgiveness?

She seemed to be retaliating against Tao Ran, yet she was also torturing herself.

With every harsh word she spoke to the woman in front of her, a piece of the past memory would be dredged up.

The more beautiful the past was, the more it formed a sharp contrast with that figure etched in her soul—a contrast that served as a reminder of her own ridiculous one-sided devotion back then.

The decor of this restaurant was slightly vintage, and the light in the hallway was not very bright. Tao Ran stood silently under the light, her lips tightly pursed, looking at Zuo Xian with eyes that held a thousand unspoken words.

Annoying.

Zuo Xian licked her molars, a surge of irritation rising in her heart, and she let out a soft tsk.

If anyone else were present, they would likely think that Zuo Xian had abandoned Tao Ran, which was why the pampered and privileged Tao Ran was looking at her with such sorrowful and humble eyes.

“If you have something to say, I’m giving you a chance to say it now. Don’t look at me like that; it makes it seem like I’m bullying you.”

“A Xian,” Tao Ran said softly, choosing her words carefully, “I know what I did in the past was awful. You can resent me, hate me—it’s all fine, I accept it all. But could you please…”

“Stop.” Zuo Xian’s gaze gradually grew cold. “No, it’s impossible. I don’t know what that guy, Xue Shuangxi, said to you that made you run back to find me, but whatever you want, it’s impossible.”

“You were the one who said you wouldn’t like a woman, and you were also the one who said we shouldn’t contact each other anymore.”

Zuo Xian laughed lightly. “Young CEO Tao might have a short memory, but I’ve kept it noted for you.”

“A Xian, could you… could you give me a chance to atone? I’ve been…” Tao Ran pursed her lips, swallowing the rest of the sentence.

A waiter pushing a trolley approached from a distance. Zuo Xian noticed him out of the corner of her eye and glanced at Tao Ran in front of her.

The dignity and composure cultivated over ten years seemed to be shattered by Zuo Xian’s few words. Tao Ran seemed about to say something more and took a step forward.

Zuo Xian took a step back, widening the distance, her tone neither warm nor cold.

“Tao Ran, for the sake of Aunt Jiang, I can grudgingly maintain a surface harmony with you, but please don’t have any other fantasies.”

“I’m not some easily fooled little girl whom you can wrap around your finger with a few sweet words. If you keep causing trouble, don’t blame me for flipping the table completely.”

After delivering her warning, Zuo Xian turned and left before the waiter got close, which she considered granting them both some dignity.

This was to prevent their messy past from being overheard by outsiders and spreading, which would make it difficult for Tao Ran to explain things to her ‘canary’ back home.

Zuo Xian felt she had shown Tao Ran a lot of respect and hoped she would cherish the veneer of respectability and innocence Zuo Xian had left for her, out of consideration for Aunt Jiang and their childhood friendship.

After returning to the private room from the restroom, Tao Ran was already back in her seat.

She was now smiling gently and elegantly, her demeanor completely natural; there was no sign of the confrontation she’d just had with Zuo Xian in the hallway.

Only when Zuo Xian pushed the door open and entered did a trace of bitterness flicker in the eyes Tao Ran turned toward her, but as she met Zuo Xian’s sweeping glance, she lowered her eyelids.

Zuo Xian caught the glance out of the corner of her eye and just thought her acting was good.

This mask of deep affection was quite deceiving.

Zuo Zhimi had had a little to drink, and her words became increasingly unreserved. Her gaze shifted between Tao Ran and Zuo Xian.

“How is it that you two went to the restroom together but came back one after the other? Did you quarrel?”

Zuo Xian said flatly, “We weren’t using the same stall, so coming back separately is normal, isn’t it?”

“I watched you two grow up. When you were little, you practically wanted to use the same stall,” Zuo Zhimi shook her head, a little wistfully. “You’ve become distant now that you’ve grown up.”

Zuo Xian was speechless, but she couldn’t just blurt out that they had fallen out, and had been for many years.

Even if the two elders vaguely sensed it, that was different from openly confirming it. Zuo Xian didn’t want to be hounded by Zuo Zhimi about why she broke up with Tao Ran.

Just as she was caught in a dilemma, Tao Ran chuckled and proactively took over the conversation.

“It’s my fault. I’m used to being alone, so when I came out of the restroom, I naturally walked back, completely forgetting to wait for A Xian.”

“You’ve worked hard all these years abroad,” Zuo Zhimi’s thoughts were very erratic after drinking, and she immediately changed the subject, starting to dote on Tao Ran again.

“How long will you be staying this time?”

“I’m not leaving. All the paperwork has been processed. Tao Corporation will officially relocate back to the country in a while.”

Not leaving.

This phrase sounded all too familiar.

Zuo Xian lowered her head to drink tea, and upon hearing this, she let out a slight sneer. The sound was quiet but was heard by Tao Ran.

The smiling woman’s expression froze for a moment. The hand resting on the table tightened, her fingertips turning white.

“It’s good to be back home. We were always worried about you when you were abroad, you child… sigh.” Zuo Zhimi patted Tao Ran’s hand, speaking heartfelt words.

Zuo Xian chewed a piece of fish meat without tasting it, wishing this dinner party would end soon.

Being with Tao Ran always reminded her of her own disgraceful past self. A myriad of emotions eventually turned into the sour bitterness of self-mockery, clinging to her heart, hard to dispel.

Sometimes she couldn’t distinguish whether she hated Tao Ran, or simply didn’t want to recall the version of herself who gave her whole heart only to be discarded like a worn-out shoe.

The dinner finally ended, and Zuo Xian stood up, relieved, planning to see the two elders off in their car and then leave. However, Zuo Zhimi grabbed Zuo Xian’s hand before getting in the car.

“Xianzai, your mom and Ranran had a couple of drinks just now. You send her back, okay? You have to make sure she gets home before you leave. It’s dangerous for a young girl to go home alone when she’s drunk.”

Zuo Xian was speechless. Firstly, by both the solar and lunar calendar, Tao Ran was already twenty-seven—what kind of “young girl” was that?

Secondly, wasn’t she a woman too?

Zuo Xian really wanted to ask Zuo Zhimi: Mom, what about me?

However, Zuo Zhimi didn’t give her a chance to speak. She closed the door, tilted her head, and drifted into a drunken haze.

The silver-white sedan slowly started, leaving Zuo Xian with a willful car tail light.

It was already dark now. Although it was only September and hadn’t fully exited summer, the temperature had dropped severely after the recent rain.

At night, the wind was chilling, making Zuo Xian shiver.

She turned to look at Tao Ran, who had just walked out of the main entrance. Their eyes met, and perhaps Tao Ran hadn’t expected Zuo Xian to look at her voluntarily, so she subconsciously smiled.

Her cheeks were dusted with a slight flush, and she smiled gently and harmlessly, her eyes still hazy, revealing a trace of eagerness to please.

“A Xian,” she quickly walked up to her, her eyes hinting at something unsaid, but also worried that saying too much would annoy Zuo Xian.

Zuo Xian looked away, her voice very faint. “Where do you live? My mom said you were drinking and asked me to take you home.”

“My home…” Tao Ran seemed to think of something, a fleeting look of awkwardness crossing her brows, which Zuo Xian still caught.

Zuo Xian’s eyes moved, guessing that it probably wasn’t convenient for her to go to Tao Ran’s place. As for why…

Probably because she had a ‘canary’ at home. What else could it be?

Feeling utterly disgusted, Zuo Xian sneered. “Forget it. Find a driver to take you back.”

“A Xian?” Tao Ran didn’t know why she suddenly changed her mind, and a look of confusion flashed in her intoxicated eyes.

“I told you not to call me that. Don’t you understand?” Zuo Xian frowned. “Tao Ran, we’re both seasoned schemers; don’t try to play the innocent maiden act with me. I’m not buying it.”

The impatience in her tone was undisguised, and all her malice was poured out onto Tao Ran, instantly extinguishing the tiny flicker of light that had just appeared in Tao Ran’s eyes.

Tao Ran pursed her lips. “I haven’t hired a driver yet.”

“You haven’t hired a driver and you still drank?” Zuo Xian narrowed her eyes, unable to help but suspect she did it on purpose.

Purposefully getting drunk so Zuo Xian would have to take her home.

It wasn’t that she was being overly suspicious; it was because past history had been too profoundly painful.

“I’ll find a designated driver,” Tao Ran pursed her lips, the light and shadow flickering in her pupils.

Zuo Xian was silent for a while. “That’s best. Since that’s the case, I’m going home first.”

Without saying anything more, Zuo Xian turned and walked away. She got into her sports car and pressed the gas pedal. Tao Ran’s solitary figure gradually shrunk to the size of a speck of dust until it vanished from her sight.

The pink sports car drove around in a circle and stopped in an inconspicuous corner, the car window facing the restaurant entrance.

Only after watching Tao Ran safely get into a car and completing the task Zuo Zhimi had assigned, did Zuo Xian drive home.

She had already lashed out at Tao Ran and scolded her, so Zuo Xian felt she should be feeling a sense of retaliatory pleasure.

Yet, a fire seemed to be burning in her chest, suffocating her, making her feel increasingly depressed, unable to feel any pleasure at all.

Even after arriving home, the suffocating feeling in her chest had not dissipated; on the contrary, it intensified.

Thinking that she had work the next day, Zuo Xian forced herself to quickly wash up and get into bed to try and conjure sleep.

But lying in bed, she tossed and turned, unable to sleep. After a long while, she opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling, sighing heavily.

Her bare feet stepped on the soft, thick carpet. The bedroom was lit by a dim yellow nightlight. Zuo Xian got up and walked out to the living room.

She finally stopped in front of the liquor cabinet, casually picking up a bottle of whiskey. The amber liquor shimmered slightly in the glass, much like her own unsettled heart.