My Online Date is My Roommate - Chapter 20

Jiang Mingbo couldn’t help but feel a surge of guilt. Even though this “boyfriend-girlfriend” relationship was fake, today was, after all, only the first day.

Little Fishy: [Eh? Why are you online already?]

Fish: [Am I not allowed to be online?]

Jiang Mingbo sensed that Fei Wenxu’s temper was flaring up it was a bit different from the usual Fei Wenxu who acted polite and fake to everyone.

I knew this idiot was just posing. The moment he starts dating, he shows his true colors.

Fish: [Why were you online in the game but didn’t reply to my WeChat?]

He had that nagging feeling of being caught red-handed. Jiang Mingbo’s scalp felt numb; Fei Wenxu had settled into the role of “boyfriend” way too fast, giving him zero time to react. How was he supposed to answer?

After a long silence, the other side seemed to lose patience.

Fish: [Say something.]

Jiang Mingbo was as anxious as a cat on a hot tin roof. What kind of excuse would be flawless? If he kept playing dead, would the guy get angry enough to break up immediately?

Damn it, is the plan going to fail on day one?

Just before Jiang Mingbo turned into a total mess, a system notification popped up.

System: Through unremitting efforts, your Woodcutting skill has leveled up again. Keep up the good work!

Jiang Mingbo’s eyes lit up. An idea struck. He cleared his throat and slipped into character.

Little Fishy: [It’s just that you got online too early. I wanted to give you a surprise.]

Fei Wenxu frowned. What does that mean?

Little Fishy: [Didn’t you say we’re making it official tomorrow night? You’re busy preparing so many things, but I realized I didn’t have anything to give you in return. I thought I’d chop some Phoebe zhennan wood to surprise you, but I’ve been hacking away for ages and haven’t found a single piece…]

Fei Wenxu paused. Realizing Little Fishy’s intentions, his lips slowly curled into a smile.

Fish: [Just for that?]

Little Fishy: [Don’t be mad. I’ll try my best to get it before the wedding banquet starts tomorrow night. Until then, I won’t waste a single second of my precious time!] Little Fishy: [Striving.jpg]

Jiang Mingbo was fully committed to the act, portraying the image of a devoted little girlfriend giving her all. He was almost moved by his own “infatuation.” He didn’t believe Fei Wenxu wouldn’t be affected.

Fish: [It’s not worth it.]

Seeing this, Jiang Mingbo raised an eyebrow. Oho, when did this idiot learn to be humble? He thinks he’s not worth it? Rare.

Fish: [A piece of Phoebe zhennan wood isn’t worth you ignoring me.]

Jiang Mingbo: …

Heh. And here I thought he learned humility. I was definitely overthinking it.

Little Fishy: [I wanted to reply once I actually got the wood so you’d be happy. Who knew it would be so hard to chop?] Little Fishy: [Crying-hard.jpg]

Jiang Mingbo giggled while spamming emojis. Handling Fei Wenxu was a walk in the park.

Fish: [It’s fine. We’ll get it eventually. You don’t have to be in such a rush.] Fish: [We’ll go chop it together later.]

Pah! Who wants to chop trees with you? In your dreams! Jiang Mingbo nearly gagged.

Now that he had successfully passed that hurdle, Jiang Mingbo breathed a sigh of relief. But looking at the axes in his inventory, that weird, stubborn streak of his kicked in again. He had wasted so many pills and so much stamina; giving up halfway was simply not his style. If he could handle Fei Wenxu, why couldn’t he handle a piece of wood?

No. I’m getting that wood today, no matter what.

Little Fishy: [Even if you say that, I’m going to keep at it. I will definitely get it for you.] Little Fishy: [Clenched-fist.jpg]

Jiang Mingbo felt zero psychological burden pinning this excuse on Fei Wenxu. He was going to battle this crappy game to the end!

Fish: [There’s no need.]

Little Fishy: [Alright, say no more. My mind is made up. I’m done chatting you’re wasting my woodcutting time.]

This sentence was actually genuine. Jiang Mingbo had already raised his axe, ready to go, but Fei Wenxu kept messaging him, hindering his grand ambitions.

Fei Wenxu sent a few more messages, but when the other side truly stopped replying, he let out a chuckle and a sigh. He hadn’t realized she was such a “stubborn mule” before, but the thought that she was so obsessed with the wood just for him made his heart feel warm and amused.

Fish: [Thank you, Little Fishy.]

Since she was investing so much time and energy for him, he had to properly prepare for the ceremony. Fei Wenxu opened the top-up interface and dumped money in without blinking. Since his gear was already at the ceiling, he’d just dominate a different category the wedding banquet.

Jiang Mingbo didn’t even have time for dailies; he spent the entire night wasting away at the trees. Friday night meant many students were online, and the guild was lively. Normally, he’d be right in the middle of the banter, but today he was unexpectedly quiet so quiet that everyone felt off.

Guild [Small Foam]: [Where’s my Fishy-sister? Why hasn’t she been seen all day?]

Guild [Piggy Needs to Lose Weight]: [Don’t even get me started. She hasn’t said a single word tonight.]

Guild [A Cup of Mango Pomelo Sago]: [Report! News from the front lines: Little Fishy is currently online.]

Guild [Small Foam]: [Could it be that our former sister has leveled up her status and won’t play with us trash anymore?]

Guild [Piggy Needs to Lose Weight]: [Ah? Fishy, you have such a cruel heart.]

Guild [My Sword is Very Sharp]: [Fishy, you have such a cruel heart.]

Guild [Small Foam]: [Sharp, you really are a jerk. Who’s your sister? Don’t barge into our sister-session!]

Guild [My Sword is Very Sharp]: […Refuse gender discrimination.]

Guild [Ding-Dong-Deng]: [Sisters, can we stop the line for a second and tell me how Fishy “leveled up”?]

Guild [Small Foam]: [You want to know?]

Guild [Ding-Dong-Deng]: [Yes!]

Guild [Small Foam]: [Not telling you!]

Guild [Guanshan is Hard to Cross]: [Bullying a high-schooler like this… you guys aren’t human~]

Guild [Piggy Needs to Lose Weight]: [Your Little Fishy is having a wedding banquet with the President tomorrow night.]

Guild [Ding-Dong-Deng]: [? WHAT!]

Guild [Small Foam]: [Status leveled up. The days of happily running dailies together are gone forever.]

Guild [Piggy Needs to Lose Weight]: [The times of eating melons and sharing pictures of handsome guys are gone forever…]

Guild [Ding-Dong-Deng]: [So why isn’t Fishy speaking? Give me an explanation! While I’m out here grinding dailies, you’re secretly hugging a ‘thigh’ [carrying player]!]

Guild [Fish]: […]

Guild [Small Foam]: [Oops, the ‘thigh’ is here.]

Guild [Fish]: [Don’t bother her. She’s chopping trees.]

Guild [Small Foam]: [No way. We’re just chatting; does she really fear being bothered while chopping trees? Don’t open your filter too wide, President Fish. ‘Love-brain’ behavior is a no-no.]

Guild [Fish]: [Chopping Phoebe zhennan.]

Guild [Small Foam]: [Then this servant shall take her leave. You really can’t be disturbed while chopping that stuff.]

Guild [Piggy Needs to Lose Weight]: [What’s with Fishy? Why did she choose to chop Phoebe zhennan? Did she get tired of the good life and decide to give herself a challenge?]

Guild [Guanshan is Hard to Cross]: [If I remember correctly, someone is still missing one last piece of Phoebe zhennan…]

The guild members suddenly understood!

Guild [Piggy Needs to Lose Weight]: [Aiyo, say no more. I get it. She’s bringing her own dowry!]

Guild [Small Foam]: [Tsk tsk tsk. Fishy really is infatuated~]

Guild [A Cup of Mango Pomelo Sago]: [President, look how good our Fishy is. You’d better not be a heartbreaker.]

Guild [Fish]: […]

Fei Wenxu sometimes didn’t know if having such an overly active guild was a blessing or a curse.

Jiang Mingbo panted as he used up all his stamina. His inventory was full of common wood, with no sign of the Phoebe zhennan. He popped his last stamina pill and lurked in the guild chat while waiting for recovery. Seeing everyone making jokes, he chimed in.

Guild [Little Fishy]: [He won’t be a heartbreaker!] Guild [Little Fishy]: [Hehe.jpg]

Jiang Mingbo smiled wickedly in silence. Because I’m the one who’s going to be the heartbreaker. Wa-ka-ka-ka-ka…

He started fantasizing again about the scene where he tossed Fei Wenxu aside like trash, and the guy tearfully begged for a reunion. Just thinking about it felt cathartic.

Guild [Small Foam]: [Fishy, the banquet hasn’t even happened yet and you’re already rushing to defend your man. You’re hopeless. Two ‘love-brains’ together you two are a lost cause.]

Small Foam was a very talkative girl, and most of the guild’s catchphrases came from her. Every time she spoke, a bunch of “repeaters” would follow. This time was no different.

Jiang Mingbo just wanted to say a few words to consolidate his “simple, cute, and humorous” online persona, but seeing the guild channel filled with the “lost cause” spam, he couldn’t find a gap to speak. He looked for a moment and then chose to retreat. Fine, fine. If I can’t beat them, I’ll hide.

Fei Wenxu was also getting a headache from the spam. After a moment of silence, he clicked the red envelope button and tossed several large ones into the guild.

Guild [Fish]: [Wishing you prosperity.]

The repeaters stopped instantly. The envelopes were snatched up in a flash.

Guild [Small Foam]: [Hi, President, you’re being too formal. Why send red envelopes… Eh? I’m the Luck King!]

Guild [Piggy Needs to Lose Weight]: […I refuse to accept this. Three envelopes and I wasn’t the Luck King once?]

Guild [My Sword is Very Sharp]: [I didn’t get a single one! President, another one?]

Fei Wenxu chuckled and typed: […]

Jiang Mingbo’s eyes widened; he was filled with regret. How? How did he miss three envelopes in the blink of an eye? Given Fei Wenxu’s spending habits, those envelopes were bound to be huge. Jiang Mingbo wouldn’t accept private transfers, but “snatched” money was different. He didn’t believe the guy would have a reason to ask for it back.

Guild [Little Fishy]: [What did I miss?]

Guild [Small Foam]: [You already have a ‘private custom’ [Fish], what do you need red envelopes for?]

Everyone echoed the sentiment, then Fish suddenly sent another string of envelopes.

This time, Jiang Mingbo’s hands were fast. He buried his head and tapped furiously from top to bottom, not missing a single one.

Guild [Small Foam]: [Is this the power of love?]

Guild [Piggy Needs to Lose Weight]: [See that? That is love.]

Guild [My Sword is Very Sharp]: [Holy crap, your hand speed is too fast! I missed them all again! Brother Fish, you’re my real brother. One more, just one!!!]

Guild [Small Foam]: [Sharp, I advise you to recognize your status. You think your name is Little Fishy?] Guild [Small Foam]: [Picking-nose.jpg]

Guild [Piggy Needs to Lose Weight]: [You’re begging the President? I think you haven’t realized our Fishy’s domestic ‘imperial status.’]

Guild [My Sword is Very Sharp]: [I didn’t get one. Not a single one. Little Fishy, look at me.]

Jiang Mingbo, having finished his round of snatching, withdrew from the guild chat satisfied. He didn’t look back at the screen at all, leaving Sharp’s messages unanswered. The other guild members were maxing out their “taunt” skills, rubbing salt in the poor guy’s wounds.

Guild [Small Foam]: [Sharp, I advise you to stop looking for trouble…]

Guild [My Sword is Very Sharp]: [Little Fishy, the days when we ran dailies together are gone forever…]

Guild [Fish]: [?]

Fei Wenxu stared at that accusing message, feeling a strange discomfort in his heart.

Guild [My Sword is Very Sharp]: [President, I’m joking, just joking! Don’t get triggered…]

Guild [Small Foam]: [I’m going to die laughing.]

After another round of chopping, Jiang Mingbo still had zero rewards. He huffed and kept popping pills, then casually clicked back into the chat. He saw Sharp looking like his heart was breaking. For this “annoying” brother, Jiang Mingbo felt a bit bad; he was only catfishing Fei Wenxu, and “collateral damage” to this guy felt a little wrong.

Guild [Little Fishy]: [Wishing you prosperity.] Guild [Little Fishy]: [Everyone gets a share.]

Guild [My Sword is Very Sharp]: [HOLY CRAP!!!! Little Fishy, you’re an angel! My god, I got it!!!!]

Guild [Little Fishy]: [You’re welcome.]

Guild [Small Foam]: [Fishy, you really are simple-minded. Aren’t you afraid our President will get angry?]

Jiang Mingbo frowned. Based on his understanding of Fei Wenxu, what was a single red envelope? Why would he be mad? If Fei Wenxu was that petty toward Little Fishy, did he even need to keep building the relationship? He’d just dump him now and let him taste the bitterness of heartbreak.

Under the bed, Fei Wenxu frowned. He felt disgruntled but didn’t speak. Little Fishy’s coordinates were still in Zhangjiajie; she was still chopping Phoebe zhennan wood for him. He shouldn’t be feeling this weird jealousy.

Jiang Mingbo waited for two minutes. As expected, there was no reply from Fei Wenxu. See? I knew he didn’t care that much yet. I’ll just keep chopping trees sooner or later, I’ll make that idiot kneel before my axe.

Thinking this, Jiang Mingbo felt more energized than ever. Even after the dorm lights went out, he realized he was staying up late again, but he comforted himself it was Friday, so it didn’t matter.

Perhaps sincerity really does move the gods. Just as his pills were about to run out, a golden flash appeared on the screen. The system announced the joyous news of Little Fishy chopping a piece of Phoebe zhennan wood.

Jiang Mingbo blinked, then realized he had finally succeeded. Knowing Fei Wenxu had gone to bed earlier, he assumed the guy had logged off. He switched to WeChat to share the news, but a game message popped up even faster.

Fish: [You got it. Go to sleep now.]

Little Fishy: [How are you still online?]

Fish: [Waiting for you.]

Jiang Mingbo knitted his brows and carefully poked his head out from his bed curtains. The dorm was pitch black, and everyone’s curtains were tightly shut. It didn’t look like Fei Wenxu was still up playing on his computer…

He caught a glimpse of the other’s bed curtains and saw a faint glow from a phone. Jiang Mingbo’s eyebrows rose. He realized Fei Wenxu was using his phone just to wait for him to finish chopping wood. He couldn’t help but start to giggle.

Fei Wenxu, you’re totally obsessed with Little Fishy, aren’t you?