I've Tried Going Back to Life After Dying - Chapter 12

“Father, I have something to discuss with you.”

Hildegard visited her father’s study, and he welcomed her warmly.

“What is it? You sound so formal.”

Oh, Father.

Her aged father’s memories weren’t that old yet. The father before her couldn’t possibly know about that future, appearing even more youthful than Hildegard before her return from death.

Hildegard still hadn’t grown accustomed to this, and just facing him like this made emotions well up in her chest.

Though she knew it would confuse him, Hildegard had to say it.

“I wish to remain by Lauren’s side.”

“Hmm. You’re always by his side, aren’t you?”

“For all eternity.”

“That’s quite a long time.”

Her father made a face as if Hildegard had started saying strange things again.

Which meant that even before her regression, Hildegard must have occasionally made odd remarks.

Though it was about herself, she couldn’t quite recall those details.

“Lauren is our family’s precious heir. However, his physical condition is fragile. Therefore, I intend to support him.”

“What do you mean?”

The hardening of her father’s voice wasn’t just her imagination.

“I mean exactly that. I will become his right and left hand, supporting him from every angle. I’ll handle external affairs, accompany him to negotiations, manage documents, and take part in ‘the lord’s duties’ that is, the management of our territory.”

“You will?”

“Yes.”

Her father’s usual gentle expression shifted to that of the family head. But Hildegard had once been a marchioness, so she carried herself with an air of authority that even surpassed his.

For a moment, her father faltered under the overwhelming presence she exuded.

“Until Lauren’s very last moment, I will remain by his side, supporting and assisting him. After that, I intend to uphold this house as its successor.”

“Hildegard, you—”

Her father lost his words there, furrowing his brow.

Both her father and mother had already steeled themselves for Lauren’s short future. It was an unspoken understanding among them all.

That Lauren had lived to twenty-four was already considered long. The doctors had once said he wouldn’t even reach adulthood.

Hildegard was declaring that after Lauren’s passing which would likely occur after he became the family head she would take up the mantle herself to ensure the family’s survival.

“Are you saying you won’t marry?”

“Yes.”

“Will you take in a husband?”

“No.”

She had already experienced marriage once. That single time was enough.

“Then what do you intend to do?”

“Nothing complicated. I shall remain unmarried and become the Countess. As for succession, I’ll adopt a bright boy from among our vassals. There are plenty of families with many sons to choose from.”

In this life too, Hildegard considered adopting Austin.

Austin was the son of a distant relative of the count’s family.

He hadn’t even been born yet—he would come into the world the year Hildegard turned nineteen.

She didn’t understand why her husband had chosen Austin for adoption back then.

If it was about succession, there were suitable boys from the marquis’s bloodline. If preserving the family was the goal, they should have taken a child from their own kin.

Yet, her husband had deliberately gone against the clan’s opposition and brought Austin into their family through Hildegard’s birth family.

Austin, with his dark brown hair and jade-blue eyes just like Hildegard.

When the two stood side by side, they looked like mother and son.

Her husband must have wanted to give Hildegard, who couldn’t bear children, a child of her own. And so, he had given her Austin while taking Helen as his mistress. That was when they were both twenty-three.

Though those sorrowful memories felt distant now, even after returning from death, a lingering sentiment remained in her heart.

Marriage? She’d had enough.

She had fulfilled her responsibilities in her past life.

Hildegard had resolved to remain single in this life.

As for succession, that boy would do fine again. With Austin by her side, life would surely be joyful.

“I already know of a good child. I shall adopt him. Since he shares our blood, you need not worry.”

She spoke of Austin who hadn’t even been born yet as if his birth was already certain.

“Huh?”

As expected, only bewilderment showed on her father’s face.

From the mouth of a daughter who hadn’t even had her debutante ball yet came talk of succession, adoption, becoming a countess, and remaining single, words that should never be spoken so casually. His expression seemed to ask, What am I supposed to do with this?

“You needn’t worry about the family. Lauren is alive. Even if… even if something were to happen, it’s not your place to sacrifice yourself.”

Her father’s words were reasonable, both as the family head and as a father.

But Hildegard was the one with the upper hand here. She knew the future. A future where she had been a marchioness, managing an entire clan.

She had handled administrative duties and could maneuver as well as any noble head of household.

Her husband had acknowledged that, entrusting the household to her while he indulged in his relationship with his mistress.

“At any rate, I have no need for marriage proposals. Please reject every single one that comes my way.”

From the moment she entered the academy, numerous marriage proposals had been brought to Hildegard. In the past, she had found them both embarrassing and flattering, but in this life, they were unnecessary.

She would live alongside Lauren, see him off when the time came, and then inherit the count’s household.

There was no need to sacrifice Atrey as she had in her past life. Instead, the happiness of raising Austin awaited her.

Hildegard’s mind was already made up.