I’ve Decided to Let You Go - Chapter 98

The emperor’s bedroom stretched out like an endless sea, filled with every imaginable luxury. It was exactly the kind of room one would expect from Kail Letius.

Natasha slowly began to walk through the room, which was nearly the size of a small estate.

She needed to start searching immediately.

Not knowing where to begin, she decided to start near the entrance.

The secret room.

It was a hidden chamber within the emperor’s quarters that led to an escape route. The Imperial Knights planned to break in through that passage when the time came.

So her task now was to find the secret room and the connected exit beyond it.

She remembered what Sieghart had told her. Secret passages were usually located beneath the floor or hidden behind bookshelves.

Because the passage itself was large, it had to be concealed in a spacious area.

She removed her shoes and carefully pressed her bare feet against the floor, trying to feel for anything unusual.

The rough floor made her feet blister quickly. Heat began to rise through her sore soles. She hadn’t even finished checking half the floor, yet the pain had already pushed her to her limit.

But since this was only a preliminary search, it would be enough to check the rest of the floor next time. Instead, Natasha decided to spend her remaining time inspecting everything else.

To mark where she had already searched, she lightly scratched the wallpaper with her needle. The mark was so small that even the maids cleaning the room wouldn’t notice.

Finished with the floor, Natasha headed for the emperor’s study.

The study was unnecessarily large, just like the bedroom.

It didn’t seem like the kind of place a man like Kail, who avoided reading, would use. These books were probably inherited from his ancestors.

Looking up at the tall shelves lining the walls, Natasha let out a short sigh. It was just as overwhelming as the floor.

She began with the bookshelf closest to the door.

One by one, she pulled books forward, checking behind them for hidden doors.

She inspected the lower shelves, the middle ones, and finally the highest ones. She had to use a ladder to reach the top, which took twice the time and effort.

Her right hand was still injured, so she couldn’t use both hands. That made her progress slow and inefficient.

She couldn’t believe she had only finished the fifth bookshelf.

Standing on the ladder, she moved her left hand carefully from one side to the other. Once again, she found nothing but solid wood and the unbroken order of books, insisting there was no hidden mechanism.

She climbed down and moved the ladder to the next shelf. Time was passing quickly, and she hadn’t even finished a quarter of the study.

As she worked, her eyes scanned the room instinctively.

She caught herself counting the bookshelves.

She had only finished about thirty percent of the room.

There was still a long way to go.

But the more she repeated the process, the more efficient she became. Her pace improved, and she managed to examine four more bookshelves in much less time.

She tried to be thorough, but time was limited. She couldn’t afford to overdo it. Any areas that looked suspicious would be checked again during the second round of the search scheduled in two days.

So far, three spots had caught her attention.

Then, while checking the middle section of the tenth bookshelf, she heard something.

A soft clunk.

As she pulled one of the books, something inside made a sound.

It was the clearest sign she had found so far.

Heart racing, she quickly pulled the book free and looked behind it.

There was nothing there but plain white wallpaper. The same kind she had seen all over the room. There was no door. No opening. Nothing.

It was a familiar kind of disappointment.

What had caused the sound then?

Could it have just been a coincidence?

She reached to slide the book back into place.

Then, the sound came again.

Another clunk.

This time it was louder and closer.

But the sound hadn’t come from the bookshelf. It came from the door behind her.

Natasha turned around in shock. Had she really been so focused on the search that she hadn’t heard someone enter?

As she scrambled for an excuse, her eyes locked onto the person standing there, and they widened in disbelief.

The book slipped from her hand and hit the floor with a quiet thud.

“Kayeina.”

She had never imagined they would meet again like this.

Kayeina Ten.

The friend she once believed would stay by her side forever. The woman she had loved deeply. Her only light in a world filled with darkness.

Kayeina stood silently. She looked just as surprised, as if she hadn’t expected to see Natasha either.

Natasha regained her composure and picked up the book from the floor.

“It’s good to see you. It’s been a while. Have you been well?”

She slid the book back onto the shelf, trying to sound casual.

“Actually, never mind. We’re not really in a place to ask each other things like that anymore.”

She acted as if nothing had happened and returned to her search. She avoided using the ladder to keep Kayeina from noticing the full extent of what she was doing, checking only the lower and middle shelves.

If Kayeina left now and reported her, everything would be ruined. Whether now or later during the banquet, Natasha had to make sure Kayeina didn’t speak.

She knew her former friend wouldn’t follow her willingly.

“But I was still curious.”

Kayeina didn’t respond.

“I know you probably don’t want to hear this, but I always hoped you were happy, wherever you were.”

She spoke gently, trying to soften Kayeina’s nerves and buy herself time.

Thankfully, Kayeina didn’t lash out or raise her voice. Enough time had passed for her to react, yet she remained still, even calm.

Natasha couldn’t guess her thoughts. But doing nothing wasn’t an option.

Standing still meant failure. Being caught meant failure.

If there was even a small chance of success, she had to keep going.

She kept pretending to focus on Kayeina while checking behind the books.

As she moved, she searched for a topic that would hold Kayeina’s attention.

“Oh, Kayeina. There’s something I never really explained to you. We were once close more than that, we owed each other our lives. I think we deserve the chance to clear up at least some of the misunderstandings between us.”

Natasha had known Kayeina Ten for a long time. She understood her vulnerabilities and was certain this conversation would hit the right nerve.

“Do you remember the day we first met? You greeted me so warmly, then suddenly told me I felt different. Like I had changed.”

She brought up their reunion.

For Natasha, it had been a joyful moment. But maybe for Kayeina, it was the return of someone she no longer trusted.

The memory stung, but she forced the feeling aside and stayed focused.

“You were right. I had changed. I had to. I did it to survive.”

“You used to say you never wanted to live. Now you’re claiming you changed to survive? That’s a contradiction.”

Kayeina’s voice finally cut through the silence. Her words were sharp and laced with frustration. Natasha gave a faint, tired smile.

“I didn’t want to live. Not once. Not in any of the ten lives I had before this. I began the eleventh hoping it would be different, but even now, that hope hasn’t returned.”

“Ten lives? Eleven? What are you talking about? Are you saying you died and came back over and over again?”

Kayeina asked, her expression confused and tense.

“Maybe I repeated them. Maybe I returned.”

“If you’re trying to have a real conversation, then speak clearly.”

“My first life started with you. I saw you, held your hand, and couldn’t believe you were real. Maybe I even thanked the gods for letting me live a life where we were together. I was innocent back then, the kind of soft, naïve girl you expected me to be.”

Natasha paused, then continued with a voice filled with quiet resolve.

“One day, Sieghart Aschart came to me and proposed. He said he loved me, even though we’d never met. I didn’t believe him. How could I? He was the emperor’s dog, the one everyone said was loyal to the empire that destroyed my family. There was no reason for a man like that to offer his hand to me.”

No one else had ever heard what she was about to say. Until now, only Sieghart and the divine had known.

“But somehow, those six months we spent together changed me. I stopped thinking clearly. I let my guard down. I said yes. I became Natasha Aschart. I thought maybe I’d be happy.”

She stopped in front of the eighth bookshelf, her fingers grazing the middle shelf.

“But what waited for me was hell.”

She turned her eyes back to Kayeina.

“And one of the people who helped create that hell… was you, Kayeina Ten.”

Kayeina didn’t say a word.

“In that place, you cursed me again and again. You shattered what little love I had left. Then you had the nerve to comfort me like nothing had happened. Even on the day I died.”

Natasha paused.

That was when she saw it.

Behind the shelf, hidden in the wall, was what she had been looking for.

The emperor’s secret passage.

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