I’ve Decided to Let You Go - Chapter 30

Life was supposed to feel stable again once Kayeina returned, but things remained unchanged. Perhaps it was because of the strange emotions that surfaced on the day they reunited, but Natasha found it difficult to be as comfortable around Kayeina as she used to be.

Because of a mix of responsibilities, the work was evenly divided among the three of them. Just because Kayeina had always been close to her didn’t mean she spent more time with Natasha or left personal tasks to her. There was never any favoritism.

Thanks to that, Natasha was able to spend a lot of time with Meliana and Vanessa as well. As time passed, both of them gradually opened up to her.

Even her relationships with the proud maids had grown warmer. But the distance between Natasha and Aschart hadn’t narrowed at all. They slept in the same bed and sat at the same table, but there was no change in the level of affection between them.

“I’m so tired of this.”

Of course, the real reason was Natasha’s coldness.

From the second day she stayed at the ducal estate, without missing a single morning, there was always a note placed on the table for her. Today was no different.

As usual, she tossed the note into the trash. But this time, she noticed something. Yesterday’s trash—or more precisely, the note she threw out yesterday—had been cleared away without a trace.

“At this rate, someone might notice something’s wrong between us.”

A servant tasked with emptying the same trash every day might eventually get curious and open the note. Since she hadn’t heard any rumors yet, it likely meant the servant either knew to keep quiet or didn’t think much of it.

Before heading to breakfast, Natasha turned to Vanessa, who was selecting jewelry.

“Vanessa, have you heard anything about my relationship with His Grace?”

“Hmm… only that the two of you are really close. There’s a rumor that even though you don’t show affection in front of us, you’re like a sweet couple behind closed doors. And also…”

Vanessa’s pale cheeks turned pink as she spoke honestly.

Feeling like she’d made a fuss over nothing, Natasha quickly changed the subject.

“Never mind. That’s enough. Do you know who’s in charge of cleaning the bedroom?”

Vanessa began listing the people responsible for making the bed, cleaning the windows, sweeping the floors, and managing the dressing room. As someone who had passed the hiring process on her first try, she answered smoothly and confidently.

“Thanks. What about the trash bin? Do the cleaners handle that too?”

“Are you talking about the one in the study?”

“No, the one next to the bed.”

Vanessa thought for a moment, mentally picturing the bedroom layout. Then she remembered the item Natasha meant.

“Oh, that one… I believe His Grace gave instructions not to touch it. So we leave it alone. I think he manages it himself.”

It turned out the trash bin next to the bed was handled personally by Duke Aschart.

“So you’re saying no one else touches it?”

“Yes. He said it had to do with his private matters and told us not to go near it. Even if someone was curious, no one would dare peek inside.”

If Aschart had been that firm, it was unlikely any servant would go near the bin. Fear of consequences would keep them away.

“So he’s been watching me throw away the notes this whole time…”

Even though he knew she was tossing them out, he still left a note every day. Some people might see that as touching, a sign of his sincerity. But Natasha just found it frustrating.

Maybe it was because she knew that kind of “effort” came from something false.

That night, Aschart stayed out late finishing up work. As Natasha lay awake, tossing and turning, her conversation with Vanessa came back to her.

Suddenly sitting up, she lit a candle, tore a page from her notebook, and wrote a short message.

**“I heard that you manage the trash bin beside the bed, Your Grace.
So you’ve been watching me throw away your notes all this time.

Now that I know, I’m going to be more direct.
I never asked for those letters, so there’s no need to keep leaving them.

Both your time and this world’s beauty are too valuable to waste.”**

She left the note exactly where he always placed his.

The next morning came.

Natasha woke around her usual time and stretched lightly. Something felt off. She turned her head—and the table was empty. The note that was always there was gone. It seemed he had read her message.

“So, he’s finally given up on that pointless habit.”

But knowing how persistent he was, Natasha doubted he’d give up just because she rejected him. He was probably already planning his next move—thinking up something strange to do all over again.

Just the thought gave her a headache already.
Natasha let out a quiet sigh, fully got out of bed, and walked across the floor. As she passed the partition that separated the bedroom from the sitting room, a familiar head of hair came into view on a familiar sofa.

“Your Grace?”

The man who usually left before dawn and only showed up again at breakfast was, for once, still in the room.

Sieghart, who had already noticed her footsteps, turned his head toward her without surprise when she spoke. His face, perfectly split down the center by a sharp nose, was more refined than any sculpture.

“Good morning, my wife.”

“Good morning. It seems your schedule is clear this morning.”

“I handled my morning duties last night. Other than the knight training session at noon, I have no other obligations.”

“Then you should take some time to rest.”

Natasha hesitated, wondering if she should return to the bedroom, but instead chose to walk forward, pretending nothing was unusual.

On the table beside Sieghart was the book she read every morning. Without sparing him a glance, she reached for it. That was when something caught her attention.

She picked up a familiar scent in the air above the table. When she looked across, directly in front of him, she saw something spread out.

They were the notes Sieghart had written to her every morning.

“I knew you didn’t appreciate my gifts,” he said quietly. “But I didn’t expect you to be so indifferent.”

“”

“It would have been better not to throw them away.”

He spoke in the same dry, calm voice he used in everyday conversation. But Natasha could tell that he had read her expression clearly.

“They were gifts I never wanted.”

“You’ll regret it.”

“Regret?”

She hadn’t planned on continuing the conversation, but that unexpected comment broke through her restraint. She couldn’t help but ask.

“When someone throws away the footprints of love and sincerity left by the one who cares for them, how can they not regret it later?”

But even as he spoke, Natasha couldn’t shake the feeling that the words weren’t meant for her. It felt like he was talking about himself. Like the man who seemed to be watching her was, in truth, staring straight into a reflection of his own soul.

“No, Your Grace. You’re wrong. I won’t regret it. I…”

Natasha slowly opened and closed her eyes. Each time her vision went dark and then bright again, Sieghart’s posture shifted, little by little. He looked as if he were anxiously waiting for her next words.

“There is no way I could love you.”

She blinked once more.

Sieghart’s face was expressionless. It wasn’t anger or sorrow—it was simply empty. He didn’t look at her for a while, and when he finally did, a faint smile curved his lips, one tinged with quiet sadness.

“I thought you’d say that, my wife.”

Then he raised his voice slightly, deep and firm.

“Then I suppose you also know what I’ll say next.”

He tilted his head slightly and whispered in front of her lips.

“You’re wrong, Tisha.”

“”

“You will love me. Without a doubt.”

She couldn’t remember how she responded.

The mood had become so heavy, so unfamiliar, that she must have mumbled something and rushed out of the room.

She clearly remembered Meliana’s shocked reaction when she saw the Duchess stepping out in just her sleepwear. That ridiculous scene stuck in her memory.

After that day, Sieghart began to distance himself.

Like before, he used work as an excuse to skip dinners. He returned late at night while Natasha was asleep, and left before she woke up in the morning.

Even though he had boldly claimed she would come to love him, it was clear that his pride had been bruised.

She had managed to strip away the mask he wore so well. But instead of feeling satisfied, Natasha felt strangely unsettled. She could only describe it as discomfort.

While the distance between them remained, the northern winter approached its end. As if refusing to fade quietly, a fierce snowstorm swept in. The Duchy of Aschart, always cold, became even colder.

The storm howled across the land, halting the steps of even the strongest. Crops withered, their life force drained. Rivers froze, trapping countless creatures beneath their surface. But among all the threats of winter, the most dangerous were the monsters who descended from the mountains into human settlements, driven down by the cold.

When a group of monsters invaded the area near the duchy’s border, the Aschart estate was thrown into high alert. Before the damage could spread further, Sieghart and his knights were sent to the site.

Travel time and battle couldn’t be ignored, so his absence grew longer. During that time, all authority over the estate passed to Natasha Aschart, Duchess of Aschart.

While she was in the study reviewing a stack of overdue documents, the butler Jenkins came running, knocking frantically at the door. Sweat poured down his face as he bowed and announced that a guest was waiting in the drawing room.

As Duchess, hosting unfamiliar guests was also her responsibility.

But when she checked the visitor log that morning, there had been no scheduled guests. She had been managing all guest-related affairs herself over the past week, so she was certain.

“There were no appointments today. Don’t tell me you let someone in without any notice.”

Her sharp question made Jenkins visibly flinch. A sigh escaped from his lips, and his expression grew tense. He looked like he was struggling not to panic.

“It’s… it’s not just any guest. His Majesty, Emperor Kail Letius, has arrived.”

A moment later, Jenkins finally composed himself and revealed the identity of the uninvited visitor who had entered the estate.

Kail Letius, the ruler of the Empire and the man who brought down the royal family of Charlier.

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