I Refuse This Life, Your Highness! - Chapter 77

“Is that what you call Liseon’s brilliant memory?”

“With all due respect… the vision composed of Sir Liseon’s memories was truly lovely.”

“…”

“Sir Liseon’s feelings were overwhelming and happy.”

“That means…”

“At the very least, it means that Sir Liseon has cherished you since childhood.”

The Archduke spoke. There was a faint sense of relief in his voice, which felt warm. At least Liseon had thought of me as a younger sibling. Not just since the day he came to the forest to save me, but from childhood—he had always cherished me as if I were his own younger sibling. To me, that was a great comfort.

“Vi, do you know why I shielded Sir Liseon that day?”

“Do you mean when Revien and Liseon came to the Grand Duchy?” I shook my head. I had some guesses from the conversation with the Count, but I wasn’t certain. The Archduke lightly kissed my cheek and said:

“I thought that if there was anyone in your family who saw you as family, it would be Sir Liseon.”

“…”

For a moment, I stayed silent, then tightly gripped the hem of the Archduke’s robe.

“Your Highness, may I go see Liseon?”

“Why not wait until tomorrow? You must be tired.”

Outside the window, the darkness was like spilled black ink. It was the darkest hour before dawn. We had stayed up all night. Even so, I didn’t feel tired. When I shook my head firmly, the Archduke rose as if he had no choice.

“I’ll accompany you.”

The Count stepped forward.

“Thank you.”

“It’s only natural.”

Thus, the three of us headed to Liseon’s quarters. His room was in a tower. As we climbed the spiral staircase that clung to the wall, many thoughts came to mind. After a long ascent, we arrived at the door guarded by two knights.

“Is Sir Liseon resting?”

At the Count’s question, one of the knights saluted briskly and knocked on the door. A response came from inside. Although I wanted to meet him alone, I couldn’t go that far, so I entered with the Archduke and the Count.

Liseon was sitting blankly in a chair, but when he saw me, he jumped to his feet.

“…Brother.”

“Your Grace.”

“You can call me Yuraine.”

“…Yuraine.”

His voice, as he said my name, was filled with emotion. It felt like something long suppressed, something endlessly piled up, finally burst. His face contorted.

“All this time… I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that this is all I can say, but truly, I am.”

“Why are you sorry?”

“I’ve known for a long time that our family was strange. But I thought I was doing my best to treat you well.”

“…”

“It was deceit.”

Deceit. Like affection given to a pitiful younger sibling next door—a love that cared and looked after, but not enough to include me in the family’s fold. But perhaps Liseon had unconsciously loved me as a true younger brother. I could guess why he hadn’t openly treated me as family.

“I wasn’t meant to be recognized as a family member or truly loved.”

“…”

“Because if that happened, our parents would just look for another scapegoat.”

Not all parents love their children equally. Some families need a scapegoat. The world isn’t full of good people. When such people form a family, some members are bound to live unhappily.

I was born with all the conditions to be hated. To my parents, it was as if God had given permission: “You may take all your frustrations out on this child.” Simply because of my circumstances at birth.

Thus, I became the target of their malice and hatred. But what if my parents had decided to love and cherish me instead? My parents were cold and irritable people who needed someone to vent their dark emotions onto.

For such people, a child was the most convenient trash bin. No matter how much you torment them, a little affection makes them blindly loyal again. What could be more perfect?

That’s why it had to be me. The one with Lamia, the one who stole my brother’s magic. From birth until now. Even so, I had deceived myself by saying that deep down, my parents loved me. It wasn’t deception; I had just refused to acknowledge the truth. But if my parents ever truly began to love me…

Then they would need a new target.

Liseon was afraid of that. He loved me as a younger brother but didn’t want to give up his position as the beloved second son. I couldn’t blame Liseon for that. That’s just human nature. It was even understandable.

“I don’t blame you for that.”

“…I wish you’d just get angry. Blame me and resent me.”

“No, wasting energy on that would be pointless.”

“…”

“I believe you really came here to help me.”

Because you couldn’t bear to watch any longer. Because you couldn’t keep following our parents. Because you were… worried about me. That’s why you came to help me.

“You can believe that. I swear it, to anyone.”

“Really?”

“Really. Besides, right now…”

Liseon furrowed his brow and muttered:

“Even our parents and Revien aren’t in their right minds.”

“…”

Did that play a part in his decision to leave them and come to me? Probably. But even so, I was happy that he had come to help me, his “younger brother.”

“Alright… Good night, Brother.”

“Good night, Yuraine. My regards to His Grace and the Count as well.”

Liseon bowed politely. Leaving the tower where he stayed, the Count headed to the guest quarters, while the Archduke and I returned to my bedroom. Dawn was breaking.

“You should get some rest.”

After dismissing all the attendants, the Archduke personally drew the bed curtains. By the time the outermost layer of thick silk was closed, the inside of the canopy was so dim that I couldn’t even tell morning had arrived. Only the faint glow of the bedside lamp provided a soft light.

The Archduke even helped me change into my nightclothes and brought a warm, damp towel to clean my face, hands, and feet. It was the kind of task usually done by attendants, so I was startled and tried to stop him, but he paid no heed.

The damp towel brushing between my fingers felt pleasant. After laying me down, he rested one hand on the pillow and kissed me. Following the brief kiss, he looked down at me and smiled gently.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep…”

“Close your eyes, and it will come.”

“Hmm…”

I felt so alert that falling asleep seemed impossible, but as he said, the moment I closed my eyes, my mind began to grow hazy. It felt strange to be falling asleep in the morning, a time when everyone else would be waking up, but the fatigue weighing on my body and mind bound me tightly under the covers.

The last thing I remembered was the Archduke quietly stroking my hair as I drifted off to sleep.

“Your Highness, did you cough?”

Bohenn’s cautious voice came from outside the curtains. Inside, it was still as dark as midnight. When I said I was awake, the outermost curtain was slowly drawn aside, and clear winter sunlight filtered through the fabric.

It seemed to be around noon. Since arriving at the Grand Duchy, this was the umpteenth time I’d woken up at this hour. One might think me a lazy master, but Bohenn showed no such thoughts as he instructed a servant to bring washing water.

“His Grace the Archduke has invited you to join him for lunch.”

“What? Then I should hurry…”

“He instructed us to allow you to prepare at your own pace after waking.”

The number of servants who think of me as a lazy master is bound to increase. After washing, changing clothes, and combing my hair, I headed to the dining room. It was not the banquet hall but the smaller room used for meals with just the Archduke and me. He was already there.

“Apologies for being late.”

“Not at all. You’re here quickly enough.”

Blushing slightly, I sat in the chair the attendant pulled out for me. Soon, the dining staff brought out the food. I had just finished a clear soup and was cutting a small roasted tomato in half when the Archduke suddenly spoke.

“Airdren has accused me to the Emperor.”

“….”

His tone was so casual that, for a moment, I wondered if I’d misheard him and thought he’d said, “The tomatoes are fresh.” I had to pause and think before the meaning of his words sank in, and when it did, I dropped my utensils. Almost immediately, an attendant came to retrieve the fallen items and replaced them with new ones.

“W-what?!”

“Airdren has accused me to the Emperor.”

The Archduke repeated the statement calmly.

“W-what… What do you mean? Why would he… On what grounds…?”

“There’s no need to be so agitated.”

“How can I not be?!”

“Aren’t you curious about the charges?”

The Archduke appeared composed. I couldn’t fathom why he alone was so calm about this. My family—Airdren—had accused the Archduke. I could think of a few possible reasons.

“Did he claim that you’ve been abused by me or something?”

“Precisely.”

“…”

Shameless. That was the only thought that came to mind. I hadn’t expected this approach at all. Of course, it was likely the Emperor’s orders. The goal was probably to summon both me and the Archduke to the capital.

“The Emperor’s command came with it. He said he needed your testimony, so only you are to come to the capital.”

“Ha…”

It was a transparent ploy. Summoning me alone to the capital meant they surely had measures in place to ensure the Archduke wouldn’t be able to move.

“For now, finish your meal. We’ll discuss it further when everyone has gathered after lunch.”

“…I doubt I’ll be able to digest anything.”

“Ah, I’ve miscalculated again.”

The Archduke frowned sincerely. Strangely, seeing that expression made me feel more at ease. It reassured me that this was truly a minor matter to him, enough that he could bring it up casually at the start of a meal.

Feeling reassured, I managed to eat without much difficulty. Occasionally, the Archduke would glance up to check on me. By now, such gestures no longer made me uncomfortable.

After lunch, in the parlor.

Sir Raon was absent, but instead, Liseon was present.

“Did you know about this, Sir Liseon?”

“No, I didn’t. It must have been a plan hastily made after my departure.”

“I see…”

The Archduke tapped the armrest of his chair lightly with his fingertips and said:

“Raon has gone to monitor Airdren. Prince Liohl… isn’t of much use.”

The Archduke’s glance at Liohl prompted a grumble from the prince.

“That’s too harsh.”

“Am I wrong?”

After all, someone whose skills are limited to basic self-defense isn’t much help.

“For now, Count Kiara and…”

There were too many secrets surrounding this matter. No matter how loyal the Archduke’s knights might be, it wasn’t wise to entrust them carelessly. Yet traveling without protection would be reckless, and Raon’s abilities were better utilized keeping tabs on Airdren.

As the Archduke deliberated, someone unexpected spoke up.

“I will go.”

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