I Refuse This Life, Your Highness! - Chapter 54

Pregnant?

It was a lie. The Grand Duke and I had never shared such intimacy. The Emperor rested his chin on his hand, smirking.

“And how do you intend to prove that? A Lamia’s pregnancy is difficult for even a physician to detect. Even with a final diagnosis, it’s uncertain until the belly swells. That’s the nature of a Lamia’s pregnancy.”

“You’re correct,” the Grand Duke replied evenly. “The individual and their spouse may have a sense of it, but of course, you wouldn’t trust just that. Guardsman.”

A nearby guard hesitated before stepping forward. The Grand Duke turned to me, his gaze steady.

“It’ll hurt a little, but bear it. Do you have a dagger?”

The first part was for me; the latter, for the guard. The guard reluctantly produced a dagger, and the Grand Duke took it firmly in hand. He gently lifted my shackled arms, rolling up my sleeve. His intention was unmistakable.

The guard seemed conflicted but yielded to the Grand Duke’s commanding presence. Gripping the dagger, the Grand Duke met my eyes. Time seemed to slow as his gaze locked with mine.

‘Don’t panic,’ his eyes seemed to say.

Before I could react, the blade sliced through my skin with a sickening shick. Blood welled up instantly, dark and viscous. Without hesitation, the Grand Duke lowered his lips to the wound and drank.

“…!”

My heart dropped. I tried to pull away, but his grip held firm. His lips remained pressed to my skin. The sight of him, the man I trusted above all else, drinking my blood, froze me in place.

After what felt like an eternity, he lifted his head and wrapped a handkerchief tightly around my wound. His lips were stained red. Trembling, I reached up to wipe away the blood, my shackled hands fumbling. No matter how much I wiped, it seemed to smear more than clean.

Finally, when his lips were clear, the sound of clapping echoed through the courtroom.

I turned toward the sound to find the Emperor applauding, a mocking grin plastered on his face.

“What a beautiful display of love. Truly, the bond between the Grand Duke and Duchess is… inspiring.”

The sarcasm in his voice grated on my ears. Yet the courtroom was abuzz with murmurs. Everyone had witnessed the same shocking fact: the Grand Duke had consumed a lethal dose of my blood—enough to kill any normal person—and remained unharmed. Even I couldn’t look away, astonished.

The Grand Duke stood tall, his voice steady as he spoke.

“It has been stated that Millen Ail’s body contained traces of the Duchess’s blood. However, the toxic compounds found in Airdren blood can also be replicated through a specific combination of herbs.”

“Oh? Do you believe such a claim will stand?”

“It is not a matter of belief but fact. I call for testimony from an apothecary. Any apothecary of your choosing.”

The Grand Duke gestured to the back of the courtroom. Sir Raon stepped forward, carrying a small wooden box. When he opened it, it revealed a single vial of dark red liquid, nestled beside compartments containing various herbs.

Shortly after, an apothecary and coroner were summoned to the courtroom. Before the gathered crowd, the apothecary meticulously ground the herbs and brewed them together. The bubbling concoction was then compared to samples from the vial and Millen’s body. The coroner, adjusting his spectacles, made the announcement.

“They are identical. The toxins match perfectly.”

“Interesting,” the Emperor said, leaning forward with a broad grin.

“Then surely…” His piercing gaze turned toward a specific corner of the courtroom.

I couldn’t bear to follow his line of sight.

“Airdren Count, would you care to explain yourself?”

The murmurs in the courtroom swelled to a roar. The revelation that my blood could be replicated was significant—enough to cast doubt on my culpability. If my family had known this, they wouldn’t have remained silent.

“My deepest apologies, Your Majesty,” my father said, his voice trembling. “Yuraine is my beloved child. How could I have feigned ignorance?”

Of course. My parents and siblings would never have stood idly by if they knew. Relief washed over me, and I turned to the Grand Duke.

His expression was conflicted—regretful, sorrowful, burdened.

“Your Majesty,” he continued, redirecting attention. “It’s unlikely the Duchess’s family knew the exact formulation.”

Turning back to the Emperor, he added, “However, I am aware of certain herbs that negatively affect her health. Using these, the Grand Duke’s steward, Erma, likely concocted the poison.”

“The steward?”

“Impossible!”

Erma’s voice rang out from the gallery, shrill and panicked. The Emperor, however, didn’t spare him a glance. Instead, he watched the Grand Duke with avid interest, as if enjoying a particularly thrilling spectacle.

“Very well. I order a renewed investigation, focusing on the steward Erma,” the Emperor declared. “Additionally, the Grand Duchess may return to Iserre. However, she is to remain within the duchy grounds and observe a period of probation.”

Relief washed over me. My life had been spared. The Emperor’s gavel struck lazily as he dismissed the court. Somewhere, Erma continued to shout in protest, but his cries were drowned by the weight of the verdict.

“Yuraine.”

“Ah… yes, Your Majesty.”

“Let’s return to Iserre.”

“May I say goodbye to my family first—”

The guards removed my shackles, but before I could move toward my family, the Grand Duke pulled me into his arms, preventing me from uttering so much as their names. Reluctantly, I followed as he led me out of the courtroom.

Sir Raon was waiting outside with a thick coat and a cloak. The Grand Duke took them and personally wrapped me in the layers before lifting me onto his horse.

“We’ll discuss everything once we’re home. It’s been a grueling day.”

With that, he spurred the horse forward. Sir Raon followed closely behind as we left the capital. The powerful steed galloped tirelessly, carrying us through the night. As I dozed fitfully in the Grand Duke’s arms, the familiar lands of Iserre came into view.

“We’re almost there.”

Sir Raon was nowhere in sight, likely trailing behind. The Grand Duke pressed onward, his unrelenting pace bringing us swiftly into the duchy’s gates. The stable hands rushed out to tend to the foaming, exhausted horse as we dismounted.

The Grand Duke appeared perfectly composed, yet guilt gnawed at me for showing even a fraction of my weariness. He had carried me in his arms, yet I felt utterly drained. Right now, all I wanted was to sink into a steaming bath until my skin turned red and then collapse into a deep sleep.

“…Are you very tired?”

“No, Your Majesty. I’m more concerned about you…”

“Go in and bathe. I’ll come shortly.”

I nodded and made my way to my chambers. Resilie and Bohein were already waiting to greet me. Their presence, while comforting, made me feel even more self-conscious about my disheveled state. As I walked, they trailed silently behind me, and I couldn’t help but feel how oddly familiar this place had become. It had only been three months, yet stepping back into the Grand Duke’s castle felt strangely like coming home.

Word of our arrival must have reached ahead of us because my bath and meal were ready. I thought my appetite had vanished completely, but once I emerged from the bath, the ache in my body seemed to transform into hunger.

After a light meal, accompanied by a single glass of wine, drowsiness overtook me. I didn’t even realize I had fallen asleep on the chaise lounge until I stirred to the sensation of someone adjusting my clothing.

It was him.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Your Majesty. When did I fall asleep…?”

“Ten minutes ago, I’m told. Rest properly when I’m done here.”

“Yes…”

I was still groggy, the lingering haze of sleep making everything feel distant. The Grand Duke stood silent for a moment before he suddenly spoke.

“Are you alright?”

“…”

Of course, I wasn’t. Spending an entire day on horseback at breakneck speed had been a grueling first for me. But I knew he wasn’t asking about that.

“Yuraine.”

“…”

“There’s someone who taught Erma how to recreate your blood.”

I… didn’t respond. I couldn’t.

“Only four people know how to synthesize your blood.”

“…”

“Erma, myself, and… Count Airdren and his heir, Rievein Sierra.”

I closed my eyes. My family had always protected me, believed in me, and loved me. They always had. Always.

“It wouldn’t have been Father or my brother. There must be some other…”

There had to be another explanation. My father and brother wouldn’t have revealed the formula. But it couldn’t have been the Grand Duke either. My family… my family…

“Yuraine.”

“…”

“You knew, didn’t you?”

The Grand Duke’s expression twisted in anguish.

“…Ah.”

It should have been me feeling this pain, not him.

…Yes.

I knew.

I had fought desperately to deny it, convincing myself over and over that I was loved. I told myself I was cherished, that I belonged. But deep down, I had always known. I was an anomaly in my family—a weed among roses.

In a family that had never borne a Lamia, my existence was an anomaly, a stain on our lineage. When the current Emperor had not yet ascended the throne, the birth of a Lamia had been regarded as the utmost disgrace.

And yet this Lamia—me—had inherited the magic meant for the eldest son. My parents resented me, and my brothers carried ambiguous feelings toward me. To them, I was a pitiable child, subjected to our parents’ scorn. But I was never truly regarded as their sibling. My brothers were kind and gentle, but they never saw me as part of the family.

Perhaps my family had struck some deal with the Emperor during this incident—just as they might have done in my previous life. Perhaps they were betrayed and led to the gallows by the Emperor, just as I was.

I didn’t know what to say. My thoughts stumbled over themselves as I looked up at the Grand Duke. And then I froze.

“Your Majesty?”

The Grand Duke’s face was pale as wax, and he pressed a hand to his forehead.

“…Don’t cause a commotion. Not yet. Call Nyian and Reya… immediately.”

He gripped my arm as he spoke, and then, without warning, he collapsed. A thin trickle of blood escaped the corner of his mouth.

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