I Really Want to Pet My Wife's Cat Ears - Chapter 23.1

Chapter 23.1

The earring sent by No. 001 was wrapped in layers of bubble wrap; it wasn’t even in a proper jewelry box, just casually placed in a plastic ziplock bag.

Shuoyu frowned as she examined it closely. It was a sterilized silver needle adorned with a tiny silver cat head the size of a grain of rice. It was a far cry from the multi-functional, high-tech earrings she had imagined from sci-fi movies; it looked remarkably simple.

Still, the cat head was cute. She decided to treat it as game merchandise; the low-profile accessory was something she could wear daily.

Looking up, she saw that Cat Island Diary on the TV was updating. This time, it seemed a significant amount of content was being added, as the progress bar indicated several minutes of downloading.

Shuoyu walked gracefully to the full-length mirror, wiped the silver needle with an alcohol pad for disinfection, and carefully put the earring in. Her movements were extremely gentle, as if she feared a gust of wind might blow such a tiny thing away.

The material of the cat-head earring seemed special. It was ice-cold yet smooth to the touch, not feeling like simple silver. Once it was in, the chill seeped directly from the ear hole into the surrounding skin.

Shuoyu took a few selfies, her lips curving slightly as she saw the metallic glint like a tiny star on her right ear in the photos. “It looks so small, but it’s actually quite pretty when worn.”

She just wondered how the legendary “hearing system” was supposed to be activated.

While she was lost in thought, the update for Cat Island Diary finished. Upon entering the game, just as the mist dispersed, Shuoyu felt a sudden sharp pain in her right ear. She reached up and felt a trace of fresh blood.

Frowning, the woman looked into the mirror and found that the silver needle of the earring had actually pierced into her flesh along the ear hole. It hadn’t been mentioned before that opening the hearing system required bleeding!

Worried that forcibly removing the earring now might cause secondary injury, Shuoyu, with a trace of anger between her brows, moved the controller straight toward the Trade Shop.

Then, she froze.

The rustling of the wind through the treetops, the creaking of the wooden door opening, the vibrating sound of No. 001’s joints as it flew over, and the sound of cat grass hitting the ground after being brushed by its flight… everything was transmitted clearly to her ears.

“Good morning, Shuoyu, meow! You rarely come online this early. Did you sleep well last night?”

No. 001 had been tidying up the cat grass stock, but upon seeing her, the halo atop its head rotated, and it immediately flew toward her.

Shuoyu saw No. 001’s “bun-like” mouth opening and closing. She closed her eyes and realized the voice wasn’t coming through the TV speakers at all; it was as if the sound was being produced right in front of her three-dimensional and real.

The angry interrogation that had been on the tip of her tongue softened and turned into: “I… I received the earring. But why did it bleed when I put it on?”

No. 001’s eyes went wide, and it rubbed its front paws with a look of chagrin. “I forgot to tell you, meow. This earring works by stimulating nerves to simulate the five senses in the brain, meow. It does happen like that the first time you use it, but it won’t bleed again, meow… It wasn’t too painful, was it?”

Its concern and regret seemed entirely genuine, its pink paw pads almost turning red from rubbing. The reason provided was also quite convincing. Shuoyu found herself unable to say anything harsh.

“It bled a little, but it doesn’t hurt now.”

So the hearing was formed directly in her brain; compared to real-life hearing, it was indeed much clearer. Driven by curiosity, she moved the controller and touched every item in the shop, narrowing her eyes to listen to the subtle sounds they made when picked up and put back.

“This black technology is amazing!” Shuoyu couldn’t help but praise repeatedly.

No. 001’s racing heart finally settled. It squinted its eyes and flew back to the counter to comfortably “make biscuits.”

“By the way!” Shuoyu touched her ear, where the blood had already scabbed over, and asked, “This only takes effect when the game is open, right? If I’m playing the game while talking to someone else, will it be too noisy?”

No. 001 revealed a confident little expression. “You can try it, meow. When there are other sounds, the sounds you actually hear in reality will take priority, meow!”

Half-doubting, Shuoyu opened her phone and started playing music. As she moved the phone further away or closer, the sounds from Cat Island also waxed and waned. When the sound source was close enough to a certain point, the sounds from Cat Island disappeared entirely. Just as No. 001 said, it wouldn’t interfere with real life at all.

Shuoyu couldn’t wait to find Ji Mianmian to hear her real voice, transmitted without electronic devices—to see if it was as sweet and pleasant as she imagined. However, she restrained that urge and turned back to ask No. 001: “Then how do I unlock the other five senses?”

No. 001 dazed for a moment and said shyly, “To avoid people farming achievements, the rewards can only be viewed the first time you enter the top-up page, meow…”

In the face of Shuoyu’s disappointed “missing out on millions” gaze, it waved its paw. “But since you asked, I’ll help you reveal some of the achievement requirements, meow.”

Touch: ***** Use 1000 times *** 10 times. Currently completed 236 times, 1 time. Vision: ********* Reach 100 cats. Currently completed 6. Smell: **** or ** 100 cats, **** 100 cats. Currently completed 9 and 8. Taste: ***** Provide ** 1000 portions. Currently completed 119.

Looking at the long, censored asterisks, a black line appeared on Shuoyu’s forehead. “…You didn’t really need to show me these achievements.”

The key parts were all blocked; this “consort” couldn’t guess the answers! Fortunately, every progress bar was growing. As long as she played the game step-by-step, the remaining senses should unlock one by one. Shuoyu had already prepared herself mentally for a long-term battle since she started spending money on this game.

She packed up the goods she was interested in today and accepted a few crafting missions from the bounty page. She turned back to No. 001: “I’ve finished browsing the shop for today. You don’t have to keep guarding the door; you can go out and play.”

In the past, when playing Cat Island Diary, Shuoyu’s attention would be drawn away by the realistic and detailed scenery, but today she specifically calmed her mind to “listen” to the world. The rustling leaves, the noisy seagulls, the faint sea breeze… she couldn’t help but praise the game’s attention to detail again. It was as if she had been transported to another real world.

After growing up, it had been a long time since Shuoyu had felt the world so clearly and vividly. She touched the earring on her right ear, feeling an immense sense of tranquility.

Ji Mianmian was currently with Little White and the others at the training ground. Having gradually adapted to the weight of the bow, her accuracy at the target was becoming higher and higher. When the Meow Power arrowheads hit the ground and suffered wear, the wild grass there seemed to grow exceptionally lush.

Listening to the constant “swish-swish” of arrows slicing through the air, Shuoyu could feel how hard Ji Mianmian was practicing without even zooming in. She intentionally moved the joystick slowly, wanting to see when the girl, focused on aiming at the target, would notice her.

The answer was less than three seconds. The moment Ji Mianmian turned her head, Shuoyu’s own video feed appeared in the top right corner of the game. Shuoyu had only been awake for a short while; the moment her eyes met Ji Mianmian’s, her heart skipped a beat.

Sure enough, the next moment, the “housekeeper girl” twitched her fluffy ears and blossomed into a smile toward her. “Good morning, Sister! Have you had breakfast yet?”

It was clearly a very beautiful and cute face, so why did the way she managed her feel like a “smile hiding a blade”? The feeling of being managed by a “paper wife” was equally nerve-wracking; Shuoyu, having prematurely become a henpecked spouse, gave a dry laugh.

“I haven’t eaten yet. As soon as I got the earring to unlock hearing, I came up to see the effect. I just wanted to hear you speak and then I’ll go eat immediately! Baby, your voice is so sweet and pleasant—it’s a bit different than when it comes through the phone or TV!”

The girl on the screen blinked and smiled. Then she cleared her throat, cupped her left hand to her lips, and intentionally made a lingering, flirtatious breathy sound. Shuoyu heard Ji Mianmian’s voice, which was much softer than usual, whispering: “Can you hear me like this? Sister Shuoyu? Do you like my voice?”

A current of electricity shot straight from her ear to her cervical spine. Shuoyu even felt as though Ji Mianmian was leaning against her ear, breathing hot air.

In the past, when Shuoyu scrolled through videos out of boredom, she often saw people using high-pitched “baby voices” or raspy “bubble voices.” Hearing others use such wet and hot tones always gave her goosebumps, making her feel as though her ears were being violated it was quite disgusting.

But Ji Mianmian merely added a few hints of thick sweetness, and Shuoyu’s body involuntarily began to feel hot. Shuoyu helplessly bit her lower lip and took a deep breath. “I can hear you. This directly affects the auditory nerves; even the smallest sound becomes very clear. It’s just… if you speak like that, baby, I won’t be able to control myself…”

This feeling that her every word and action could manipulate the emotions of the woman before her… it was too satisfying! Ji Mianmian’s playful side emerged. She continued to ask in a raspy and sweet voice: “Mmm… what can Sister not control? Mianmian doesn’t know. Can you teach Mianmian?”

“I’ll tell you once the touch system is unlocked!” Shuoyu accurately read the teasing in the girl’s eyes. She gritted her teeth, her gaze turning “green” as she stared at Ji Mianmian like a hungry wolf staring at its prey under its claws.

“You’re bad. I’m going to bully you back.” Shuoyu’s eyes darkened as she used the Stroke action. This time, she didn’t touch the safe zone on top of the head; instead, she went straight for the cat tail behind the girl’s bottom.

Starting from the base of the tail, she used the joystick to tease and play with it bit by bit—circling, alternating light and heavy pressure finally letting the black tail-tip wrap around her arm. While the transparent hand’s movements in stroking the cat contained no emotion, Shuoyu somehow managed to play out a few inches of desire.

“Ah… Shuoyu… don’t… don’t do that…” Ji Mianmian hadn’t expected this either. The overwhelming stimulation made her almost unable to stand firmly. The girl’s plea for help was very, very quiet, but it was all captured by Shuoyu’s ears.

With her voice, the woman felt her heart also become sore and swollen, filled with longing. She licked her lips.

This was the training ground Shuoyu had specifically built, planted with palm trees and shrubs, and placed with sandbags, arrow targets, and training dummies. Little White, Little Flower, and A-Jin were not far away, practicing how to quickly scratch the weak points of the training dummies.

They had seen Shuoyu arrive earlier, but seeing her talking to Ji Mianmian, they didn’t come over to say hello. The human and the Cat-Eared Girl always had endless things to say; not needing to come over to “perform service,” the three cats were happy and free.

To avoid losing her composure in front of the other cats, even though the fur on her tail had puffed up from being stroked, Ji Mianmian’s facial expression remained as usual. But as Shuoyu zoomed in for a closer look, she knew the corners of her eyes were red and watery. Even her speech carried a cute nasal quality: “Shuoyu, go eat quickly… stop touching me… I-I won’t speak to you in that voice anymore… quickly stop…”

“Baby, you’re so cute. I like this ‘lewd’ voice very much. But in the future, it can only be used in the room, when it’s just you and me…” Shuoyu’s inner world was incredibly noisy, like a rising thundercloud. She gripped the fabric sofa and took several deep breaths to distract herself from the craving Ji Mianmian had ignited. At the same time, her mind was filled with countless processes of meticulously serving her baby, Ji Mianmian…

As the emptiness in her body reached its peak, Shuoyu inadvertently glanced at the video feed in the top right corner. She couldn’t help but daze. She had taken many photos, but it was the first time she had revealed such an indescribable, bedroom-eyed expression.

She realized she had fallen deeper than she imagined, and a dense fear suddenly surged in her heart. Perhaps Ji Mianmian was merely reacting according to a program and didn’t possess real emotions at all. Then, was the emotion she unilaterally imposed on her—believing Mianmian liked her real?

Thinking about how, no matter how realistic the five senses simulated by this game were, they would always be in two different dimensions, Shuoyu for a moment felt a hint of disgust at herself for falling for a “paper person.”

“Be good. I’m going to eat.” This time, her exit from the game had the aura of a frantic escape.

She went out and had a simple breakfast, but all along the way, Shuoyu was absent-minded and the food was tasteless. She thought she was the type of person who was very frank about emotions someone who could pick things up and let them go—but today she realized something had gone wrong.

Today, Shuoyu had truly felt a direct physiological desire triggered by Ji Mianmian’s beautiful voice; it was the first time in her life. Her mind was a complete mess. One moment she was thinking that if only Ji Mianmian were a real person, they would be so compatible, and she would definitely cherish their relationship, work hard, and build a small home with her.

But the next moment, she thought of her being a virtual character on the other side of a screen. Perhaps the copywriter who wrote her personality program was a bunch of rough, middle-aged men wouldn’t her feelings be misplaced then?

Returning home, Shuoyu instinctively walked to the sofa, but as she picked up the controller to project the game, she hesitated. Shuoyu let out a bitter laugh and put down the controller: “Until I’ve thought it through, it’s best not to go to Cat Island.”

She sat dazed on the sofa for a long time. she remembered news that would occasionally pop up online about people falling in love with AIs or marrying virtual characters. She wondered how those people balanced the misery of never being able to touch their lover. So, Shuoyu opened her tablet and started searching for related news, wanting to understand more.

Only then did she realize that there were so many people in the world who developed sincere feelings for virtual characters. People who played otome or “raising” games like her were the most numerous. Through slow interaction, quite a few people developed a psychological reliance on characters with good looks and varying personalities.

Humans are impulsive animals; the massive revenue of major game companies is built on the real gold and silver thrown in by players to support their “paper wives.”

Beyond that, quite a few people had their hearts captured by AIs in chat software that were empathetic and gentle in their speech and mannerisms, thereby healing emotional wounds suffered in real life. Some even bypassed various worldly obstacles to hold grand, solemn weddings with virtual characters. Even virtual characters with only hollow appearances and fixed dialogue programs had so many people who liked them.

Ji Mianmian on Cat Island was exquisitely beautiful, not much different from a human, had her own petty emotions and thoughts, never repeated sentences during chats, and would even care if Shuoyu had eaten breakfast… she was too real; it was hard for Shuoyu not to like her.

After seeing all kinds of cases, she gradually understood her own heart. A “paper wife” is a “paper wife.” Compared to a real person, the only difference for Ji Mianmian was that she couldn’t be touched. But she also had the benefit of being simpler and easier to understand than a human, never cheating, and being able to accompany her whenever she opened her phone.

Shuoyu had thought it through; her own sexual orientation did seem a bit niche. Over the years, she neither liked interacting with strangers nor wanted to “eat the grass near her burrow” (date friends); the only certainty was that she liked women. But so far, she truly hadn’t met a “heart-throb guest” in the third dimension. Calculated this way, the probability of her remaining alone for life was very high.

Coming to Cat Island and meeting a girl as “to her taste” as Ji Mianmian was in itself a stroke of extreme luck. Today she had opened the hearing system, and she could open the simulations for the other four senses later; not being able to hold her wife’s body didn’t seem like something unacceptable. When the touch system opened, maybe she really could touch Ji Mianmian.

And thinking carefully, she was someone with low physiological desire. The restlessness built up from a mature body’s hormones could be solved naturally in dreams without concern, so there was even less need to find a living person to date.

She drank cup after cup of bitter tea, and after completely clearing her mind, Shuoyu decisively opened her phone to project Cat Island Diary. She, Shuoyu, had unilaterally decided to be with Ji Mianmian; the only thing that could tear them apart was the game’s servers shutting down!

The video avatar only appeared in the top right corner when she was within a certain distance of a cat. After getting used to it, Shuoyu gradually ignored her own appearance. She returned to the training ground and found Ji Mianmian and the others still practicing there.

Shuoyu used the Stroke action on Ji Mianmian’s head again. Looking at the girl’s usual sunshine smile on the screen, the small interlude from the morning was easily turned over. Shuoyu checked the cats’ attributes and showed a look of joy: “Little White and the others’ talent proficiency has reached over 10%!”

When the talents were first awakened, this value was only around 5%. Now, as her gaze fell on the wooden training dummy that had been scratched apart nearby, she knew the strength of the cat claws had increased significantly.

Since welcoming Big Yellow, Second Yellow, and Little Seashell, Shuoyu had learned that the layout of Cat Island had changed significantly compared to before. After evil spirits became able to possess cats, life for the cats on the island became noticeably more chaotic than before. Not only did the cats need to find safe spots at night, but they also had to be extra cautious when looking for spawned food during the day.

Although quite a lot of different varieties of cat grass grew scattered across Cat Island, the cats didn’t seem to know they had to eat it for three days to awaken combat talents; cats like Little White who mastered combat abilities were very few.

Shuoyu remembered the new goods refreshed in the Trade Shop today and had an idea.

Spirit-Attracting Incense (A bundle of 12): When lit, it can simulate the aura of a weak cat, attracting evil spirits. Each stick is effective for 30 minutes. Spirit-Dispelling Incense (A bundle of 12): When lit, it can clear the scent of the Spirit-Attracting Incense, ending the attraction of evil spirits early. Takes effect immediately after being lit.

By using these two types of incense together, she could attract evil spirits within a controllable range and defeat them one by one!

Shuoyu’s lips curved slightly as she looked at the cats: “Stop training for a bit, go eat something and rest. I’m going to build a temporary safe zone that’s easy to defend and hard to attack. In a little while, we’re going to fight evil spirits!”

Shuoyu opened the map and looked at it, circling a spot in the forest far from the safe zone. Considering the evil spirits’ fear of sunlight, the area was seventy percent meadow and thirty percent woods, specifically leaving a patch of shade under trees for them to hide in. She placed the obstacles she had been crafting intermittently over the past few days onto the site one by one, creating many corners for the cats to hide in.

The hard training of these past few days was finally going to be put to use. Little White, Little Flower, A-Jin, and even Ji Mianmian were all very excited. The first three cats had incredibly itchy claws and would occasionally dash to a fallen rotted log to sharpen them fiercely. The latter clutched her bow tightly, her eyes bright as she observed her surroundings.

Before officially lighting the Spirit-Attracting Incense, Shuoyu looked at Ji Mianmian. “Baby, open your quiver. I’ll replenish your Meow Power arrows.” Daily training caused some wear on the arrows, but including the spares, Ji Mianmian was carrying a full forty. For the first time trying to proactively attack evil spirits, Shuoyu only planned to light one stick of incense; forty arrows definitely wouldn’t be enough for half an hour.

A line of cats marched grandly toward the “trench,” each finding a place to lie in ambush according to their talent. The Spirit-Attracting Incense slowly ignited, and crimson smoke drifted into the wind. Amidst the quiet burning, Shuoyu soon heard an unpleasant, piercing shriek. She switched the camera to the forest and saw thick black smoke flickering in the shadows. She turned back and gave the cats a “stay calm” gesture.

The cat squad was very patient, waiting quietly until the evil spirit reached the vicinity of the incense before leaping out from various directions to extend their claws. Upon discovering they had been deceived by the incense and that there were no weak cats here to produce delicious fear, the two human-shaped black mists became increasingly wild and angry.

Sensing Little White and the others, the evil spirits immediately charged, intending to pull the cats into a spiritual space without a second thought. Shuoyu saw that after being wrapped in the thick black mist, all three cats panicked. Only Ji Mianmian, the long-range archer who was furthest away, was still drawing her bow with trembling hands to fire arrows. Facing the enemy for the first time, they still had too little experience.

Her eyes turned sharp, and she reminded them in time: “Little Flower, use Damage Reflect quickly! Little White, drain the spirit! A-Jin, jump up and scratch!”

Ji Mianmian’s archery was surprisingly accurate this time, successfully dissipating the human-shaped black mist closest to the cats. Before it could regroup into a human shape, the cats also reacted. While Little Flower bit into the black mist, a faint circle of white light radiated from its body; this light, like protective armor, spread synchronously to the other cats.

Ji Mianmian drew her bow and fired; the Meow Power arrow left a large hole in the evil spirit’s body. Little White touched the flowing black mist, narrowing its eyes to drain the mental energy and shrink the mist’s range. A-Jin moved with light agility, jumping left and right and delivering several scratches… the cat squad’s first battle was a grand victory!

Besides clicking on the black mist to distract it, the system didn’t give Shuoyu any useful offensive means, but she could observe the overall situation, offering timely reminders and acting as the cats’ best commander!

Hearing a piercing scream, Shuoyu rubbed her ears. She saw one evil spirit unable to withstand the attack and soon becoming unable to form a human shape. The black mist grew lighter and lighter, finally dissipating completely, leaving several shining drops on the ground. Seeing another mass of black mist, which had shrunk significantly, trying to retreat into the forest, Shuoyu hurriedly pressed the controller repeatedly to affect its judgment, while shouting: “Careful! The other one is trying to run!”

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