I Heard That I am a HeartBreaker - Chapter 73

Qiu Shuang felt that the fact she hadn’t physically beaten the other person already showed she was being extremely rational. She was just about to go to sleep when she saw the other girl staring at her intently with wide eyes.

“Senior… am I really that detestable?”

Qiu Shuang was truly speechless. She didn’t want to insult or attack her, but Qi Sijiao’s current expression genuinely made her feel as if she had somehow let the girl down.

Qiu Shuang was just about to tell her to get lost when she watched tears slide down from the corners of the girl’s eyes, falling one by one. Beautiful people are beautiful even when they cry; Qi Sijiao might not be a top-tier beauty, but she was close enough.

Unfortunately, the person standing before her was Qiu Shuang, not some ordinary individual. She had long since grown accustomed to this kind of “beauty attack.” Right now, what Qiu Shuang cared about more was her poor pillowcase.

Even when a top-tier beauty like Chen Wanjun had thrown herself into her arms, Qiu Shuang hadn’t reacted. What use was Qi Sijiao’s crying? As it turned out, it was completely useless.

Qi Sijiao had originally thought that Qiu Shuang might coax her, or failing that, at least scold her—anything to give a reaction.

Instead, upon closer inspection, the other woman was simply looking at her with a serious expression, seemingly contemplating some sort of problem.

“Senior… I…”

“I’m pondering a question,” Qiu Shuang said. “If you cry all night, do you think you’ll soak my entire pillowcase?”

Qi Sijiao had looked like a pear blossom bathed in rain a moment ago, but now she was more like a leaky faucet that couldn’t be turned off. She was so heartbroken, yet instead of comforting her, her Senior was saying this?

Qiu Shuang had originally just wanted to watch the spectacle, but seeing the other girl cry louder and louder—even starting to sob convulsively—she quickly covered the girl’s mouth. What kind of international joke was this? If her mother found out, she’d never be able to explain it.

Qi Sijiao was still crying and feeling miserable when she suddenly felt the other’s hand cover her face. It was a bit cool and smelled slightly fragrant, likely the scent of hand soap.

At this thought, she felt even more sorrowful. Why was it hand soap? Otherwise, she might have sneaked a lick. Now, Qi Sijiao didn’t dare; what if she accidentally poisoned herself to death?

Qiu Shuang breathed a sigh of relief when she saw the other girl’s emotions stabilize slightly. Just as she was about to let go, she saw the girl’s hand reach up to touch her own. Touching was one thing, but Qiu Shuang didn’t know how to describe the strange sensation.

She felt the girl’s fingertips tracing her skin, lightly pinching and rubbing—it felt like… flirtation?

Qiu Shuang tried to pull her hand back, but the other girl held on. She sighed. Perhaps there were always conflicts and personality clashes between people; when the two of them were together, the “magnetic field” just seemed wrong.

Qi Sijiao was still feeling happy that the Senior hadn’t scolded her immediately, but then she received several light “punches.”

The two scuffled together—or rather, it was Qiu Shuang’s unilateral venting. However, calling it a fight wasn’t quite right; it was more like a pillow fight or a bit of playfulness.

“Senior, why is it that Chen Wanjun can do that, but I can’t?”

Qiu Shuang was stunned by these words. She had no idea what the girl was talking about.

“What are you talking about? Is there something wrong with your brain?”

Qiu Shuang looked at her. She was truly fed up. Since when had these people started thinking she was someone who could be offended so casually?

“Senior, these things are matters of mutual consent. You can do anything you want to me.”

Qi Sijiao lay there, her clothes loosened, revealing a large expanse of snow-white skin. She still had some confidence in her appearance; even if she couldn’t beat Chen Wanjun, so what?

There was no rule stating a woman’s sense of morality had to be high. Qi Sijiao didn’t believe it—if she was willing to throw away her shame entirely, could she really not succeed even once?

When Qiu Shuang realized what the other was implying, she fell silent. She looked at Qi Sijiao, unsure of what to say.

It could be said that Qiu Shuang was a lesbian by nature, so she naturally paid attention to beautiful girls. To be fair, was Qi Sijiao completely unattractive? Honestly, she had charm—but so what? Was she supposed to just get together with anyone she liked?

“Don’t you think this is very… dirty?”

Qiu Shuang really didn’t understand the other girl’s behavior. How could she be so casual? Were they really that close? Did the girl even know her? What if she were actually a pervert who would hurt her? Did the girl not consider that at all?

One couldn’t blame Qiu Shuang for thinking this way. Given her life experience over the past few years, she could never have imagined someone doing something like this.

Song Ya and Chen Wanjun were not on the same path as Qi Sijiao. To put it another way, those two took the “proper” route; they were incredibly proud. Asking them to do what Qi Sijiao was doing was something they would never be willing to do.

Even Chen Wanjun’s previous bold move was ultimately just to test a baseline and a boundary; it wasn’t actually for that purpose.

What they sought was a “position,” not the person’s entire body. If they were after the person, they would have made their move years ago; there was no need to wait until today.

Qiu Shuang was even less likely to be so casual. What she wanted was to engage in such things only with her lover, the person most important to her. If she were casual about it, wouldn’t that make her affection seem shallow?

In this fast-paced modern world, Qiu Shuang’s standards seemed remarkably high.

She felt that her partner should be like her—loyal to one person (Zhong Yi), possessing their own thoughts, not accepting so-called rules and constraints, having a life they wanted to lead, and working hard for it.

Qiu Shuang had never considered Qi Sijiao, nor had she ever thought about deciding on a relationship so easily. Thus, she didn’t understand her, and she didn’t accept her. They would always be people from two different worlds.

Hearing those words, Qi Sijiao fell into silence. It was hard to describe the feeling. She admired the other’s outward appearance and everything about her, but she couldn’t explain her love for Qiu Shuang—because she didn’t even understand what love was herself.

In that moment, she wanted to cry. Let it be, she thought. It seemed like everything she did was wrong. When Qi Sijiao had heard that there was no longer anything between “them,” she had been happy to death. Her only fear had been that Chen Wanjun.

She was afraid she couldn’t compete with a “White Moonlight” (first love) and couldn’t become a “Cinnabar Mole” (unforgettable passion), so she desperately wanted to use every means possible to prove herself and find a small place for herself.

As it turned out, she seemed to be making more and more mistakes, because from the very beginning, everything she had imagined was false.

Qi Sijiao thought everything followed her logic, but in reality, the playing field had changed long ago, and the opponent was already someone else.

She couldn’t see what she wanted or what she could obtain. She thought she could protect, possess, and love others, and that others could love her back.

But while she loved others, others did not love her.

The self-righteous shepherd raises a wolf in his home, foolishly believing it will protect the sheepfold. The wolf, raised as a sheepdog, grows into a very obedient “dog.” It helps the shepherd guard a great deal of wealth, and then, at the shepherd’s happiest moment…

The wolf eats the sheep.

“Senior, are you happy? If you’re not happy, you can hit me. I am your dog.”

Listening to these words, Qiu Shuang’s expression grew increasingly solemn. She sensed a much more serious issue: this wasn’t some ethereal love. The other girl’s mental state and moral compass seemed to have major problems.

If this were at school, she would definitely tell the girl to get lost and then do everything in her power to change dorms. However, since they were at her home, kicking her out would likely cause a domestic storm.

As for a guest from afar, no matter what, Qiu Shuang couldn’t let her lose face completely. Otherwise, it would look quite unseemly.

“Senior, whatever you want, I can help you achieve it. I only want to continue staying by your side.”

“Why must you be so humble?”

Qiu Shuang truly found it inexplicable. She had never seen anyone place themselves so low in a pursuit of love. Was she some kind of magic spell? Was there some massive profit to be gained by being with her? Why else would the girl be so obsessed with her for no reason?

“Because I want to stay by your side. Everything has an equivalent exchange, and this is all I have to give.”

Qi Sijiao had roughly gauged the other’s bottom line. The “gentle” Senior was actually far less simple than they imagined; she had her own desires, but she didn’t shy away from them. Between people, it was all just “food and sex” (yin shi nan nv).

If Qiu Shuang didn’t want to play along, Qi Sijiao was willing to throw herself at her for free.

Qiu Shuang thought the girl’s brain might be broken. That strange set of logic almost brainwashed her as well.

She had to admit the girl had a nice face and an even better figure, but regardless of that, it had nothing to do with her current self.

Qiu Shuang even wondered if this was some kind of “honey trap” designed to challenge her willpower, or if there was some massive pit waiting for her behind all this.

Qi Sijiao watched as the other’s eyes, which had initially held a hint of appreciation, instantly turned into a cold scrutiny.

“I don’t know what you’re thinking, but this behavior is entirely wrong. We are just ordinary friends, ordinary roommates—at best, good friends. Good friends don’t do things like this.”

Qi Sijiao didn’t know what to say. She felt as if she had stripped herself naked, and instead of doing anything, the other person had simply turned on the evening news and started lecturing her on current events. It was absurd.

Actually, Qi Sijiao didn’t feel she was losing face, nor did she see a problem. After all, pleasing someone was just a bit of “flirtatious fun” between a couple.

Although she wasn’t the Senior’s girlfriend yet and hadn’t successfully “leveled up,” as long as she worked hard, she could take the position. At worst, she would start as a friend and develop from there.

“But Senior, what am I supposed to do? You keep rejecting me, and it feels like I have no chance at all. The only silver lining seems to be that you’re like this with others too—otherwise, I think I really would go crazy.”

At this moment, Qiu Shuang became very “traditional.” She didn’t care for the girl’s fawning at all. Qiu Shuang believed that being together meant thinking about the long term.

She didn’t believe she was wrong. What was the problem with a person wanting a stable life and a warm family?

“I never do one-night stands. If you don’t put your clothes back on properly, get out.”

Seeing the other’s face darken and her speech become very stern, Qi Sijiao said nothing. She dressed herself and lay back on the bed properly, her hands clasped over her chest. If you didn’t know better, you’d think she was a corpse ready for burial.

Having settled the matter, Qiu Shuang felt relieved. Just as she was about to close her eyes and sleep, she heard the girl’s crying again. She was truly done. Why was she still crying?

“What on earth do you want?!”

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