I Became the Heroine’s Stand-in - Chapter 98

Ersivan sat perfectly still, doing nothing but listening intently to the faint, rhythmic sound of Diana’s breathing. Her face, when he checked it, was still deathly pale. He needed to call a doctor to examine her as soon as possible, but it would be at least another few dozen minutes before they reached the Duchy. His patience, already worn thin, gave way to a doubling of his anxiety.

I should have killed him then.

He regretted it. If he had killed the Count back then, today’s disaster would never have occurred.

No, I should have killed him today.

He shouldn’t have let himself be swayed by the way her hand hesitated, unsure whether to grasp his sleeve or not. Regardless of the consequences, he should have ended the Count’s life before returning.

He looked down quietly at his own palms—the hands that had failed to act. Had he not stained them with blood countless times before? Why was it that in the most critical moment, he couldn’t bring himself to draw his blade?

Is it because…

For a split second, her terror-stricken face flashed in his mind. He knew, logically, that her expression had been directed at the Count. Yet, a part of his heart warned him not to be so certain. It whispered that perhaps that face of fear was directed at him.

He was afraid she might fear the version of him covered in blood. He was terrified she might loathe how much he had changed. Because those trivial worries held him back, he had been unable to take the Count’s head. He was always running away from his own ideals, simply because his true nature was incompatible with the values Diana Valencia held dear.

The stars sparkled dimly, and the thick darkness began to lift as the sky turned a pale, dawn-blue. The two arrived at the manor in the early hours of the morning, just before daybreak.

“Travel safely, My Lord.”

The coachman bowed politely as he saw Ersivan off. Having arrived at the Duchy of Valencia, his duty was complete. Now, it was time for him to return to the Count’s estate.

“You there.”

Ersivan called out to the coachman, who was about to climb back onto the horse.

“Yes, Your Grace?”

“How would you like to work at my manor? I can offer you quite a generous wage.”

“…At your manor? Here?”

The coachman blinked, stunned by the sudden proposal. He even repeated the subject to make sure he hadn’t misheard. Ersivan gave a firm nod in confirmation. The coachman’s eyes, which had been flickering like a dying lightbulb, now bulged like balloons.

“It… it would be an honor!”

The Mernard Countship wasn’t a terrible workplace, but compared to the Valencia Duchy, it was nothing. Valencia was a dream workplace for servants. It was said that even when the Duke’s reputation was at its worst, there were still more applicants than positions available.

“The honor is mine, to have someone as capable as you join us.”

“Then… I shall return to the Count’s estate to give my notice and—”

“There is no need to return. I will handle the notice personally via letter.”

“Pardon? But the carriage must be returned…”

“I will take care of that as well. You simply need to show up for work here tomorrow.”

Ersivan smiled quietly. Despite the beauty of his expression, the coachman could sense the unspoken command within it: Do not ask further.

“The stables are that way. Unharness the horse there. There will be a sentry on duty; they will explain where to leave the carriage.”

“Yes, yes, I understand!”

Satisfied that the business was concluded, Ersivan approached the carriage. The tense coachman quickly opened the door for him, fearing he might lose favor. Inside, Diana lay wrapped in Ersivan’s coat. He moved toward her with careful steps and lifted her light frame into his arms.

“I shall see you next time.”

Though he offered a parting greeting, his attitude suggested he was weary of everything. The coachman, sensing the mood, bowed respectfully and disappeared with the carriage. As Ersivan watched the vehicle bearing the Mernard crest leave, his expression darkened. He wanted to burn that ominous thing as soon as possible.

He then moved toward the rear of the main gate, avoiding the sentries posted at the front. The back gate, which lacked guards, could only be entered with a key. With one hand, Ersivan fumbled through his pocket before inserting the key and turning it.

Creaaak. The sound suggested the back gate hadn’t been maintained in a long time and desperately needed oil. He nudged the door with the toe of his boot, and the narrow gap widened like a opening gill. Supporting Diana’s weight with both hands again, he walked briskly toward his destination.

As he passed through the desolate garden, a black shadow—dark as the night—leapt out from the bushes.

“What on earth are you doing at this hour…”

Since it spoke human language, it wasn’t a beast. Since it didn’t look surprised to see Ersivan, it wasn’t a mere sentry.

“I knew you’d come.”

“Knew what? Am I your subordinate?”

Ersivan spoke with a familiar tone, clearly on friendly terms with the figure.

“Be careful. Support her with both hands.”

“What is this now…”

The grumbling figure took the object from Ersivan’s arms—the mysterious bundle he had been cradling. As his hands were occupied with the transfer, a dawn breeze swept by. The hood he had used to hide his face fell back.

Shining white hair, fluttering in the wind, caught the light. Next came features that were just as dazzling as the hair.

“I asked what’s going on at this hour! Phew, I thought my heart was going to drop out of my chest trying to sneak past the old geezers.”

The man possessed a delicate beauty that made it hard to believe he was a man. However, his voice was deep enough to give away his gender, and unlike his refined appearance, his speech was rather irreverent.

“…Thank you for coming.”

The gratitude seemed like nothing more than a tool to change the subject.

“No, forget the thanks, let me hear the reason.”

“…”

“Hey, why aren’t you saying anything! And what are you holding in your arms!”

Choosing silence when cornered was one of Ersivan’s bad habits. He had been told multiple times that frequent avoidance was a poor trait, but it showed no signs of improving. Still, he should at least tell me. I came running in the middle of the night; what kind of etiquette ignores the explanation entirely!

A flabbergasted Kardel shouted at him several times. Normally, Ersivan would have confessed out of sheer annoyance, but today, he was unyielding. Kardel realized that in this mood, Ersivan wouldn’t reveal a thing no matter what. Recognizing that now wasn’t the time, Kardel finally stopped his investigation.

He lifted the jacket covering the person he was holding to see who it was.

“…This is.”

His hand froze mid-air. Just as he thought the silhouette looked familiar, the clouds parted, and the moonlight shone down. As the light illuminated her features, the identity of the person became clear.

“It’s your wife, isn’t it?”

But something was wrong with her. Her beauty was still there, but she looked haggard, like a terminal patient facing death. Kardel quickly grasped the situation and the heavy atmosphere surrounding it.

In short, the situation was suffocating. If he added any more thoughtless words, the guy in front of him would likely explode—or burst into tears. I wondered why he’d wrapped her in his own coat like she was some precious treasure. I should have realized the moment they got out of that fancy carriage.

Kardel looked at Ersivan with a worried face. He had been restless, wondering if Ersivan was up to something strange, but Ersivan looked surprisingly calm. He pulled a note from his pocket to check it, but stopped the moment his eyes met Kardel’s.

He tucked the note back into Diana’s coat. His actions were perfectly composed, yet something felt unsettling about them. He looked like a stray cat caught stealing a fish—only, because the cat was Ersivan, the movement was clean.

Noticing Kardel scanning him with suspicious eyes, Ersivan smiled quietly. Offering a pure, innocent smile as if to say don’t suspect a thing, he patted Kardel on the shoulder.

“I’m counting on you.”

“…Eh? What?”

“Take good care of her.”

Kardel was flustered by the implication that he was being left in charge of Diana. He hadn’t given his consent yet. But then again, he couldn’t exactly turn away a patient. Ultimately, Kardel nodded reluctantly.

He adjusted his awkward posture and held Diana comfortably. As he shifted his grip to find the most stable position, it struck him how incredibly light she was. He could almost understand why that stiff-necked fellow was so anxious about his wife’s health all day.

Out of curiosity, he tried lifting and lowering his arms a few times. Even for Kardel, who was famous for his lack of physical stamina, she was light as a feather. Feeling a heavy gaze boring into the back of his head, Kardel looked up. He saw a look in Ersivan’s eyes that, contrary to his intent, suggested his trust was at rock bottom.

Kardel soon realized what he was thinking. Ersivan was already suspicious about leaving his wife with another man, and seeing Kardel “test” her weight like that had sparked his irritation. But Ersivan couldn’t really say anything, likely feeling guilty for dumping the responsibility.

What a selfish guy…

It was amazing how selfish his instincts could be. It was even more amazing that he had hidden that side of himself from specific people. Normally, Kardel would have teased him for his selfishness, but today, he decided to play along and rack up some favor. Suppressing a laugh, he pretended not to notice.

“Anyway, it looks like you’re going somewhere.”

“Yeah. I’ll be gone for a few days.”

“I’m asking where.”

“…Somewhere.”

“Right. I know very well you have a place to go, but I’m asking where.”

Of course, he won’t answer. Kardel sighed softly, having expected as much. Since no answer was coming, it seemed better not to ask anything else for now.

“I don’t know when you’ll be back, but make it quick. I can’t keep making excuses to your wife for days on end once she wakes up.”

“…”

“As you know, she’s quite suspicious.”

Still, it was better to instill some sense of urgency. Kardel deliberately mentioned Diana to plant a seed of anxiety in Ersivan.

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