I Am A Husband Curser, And You Are A Wife Curser. - Chapter 15

Chapter 15: Xiangxi’s Little Thoughts

“It’s a minor thing, nothing much,” Yang Tongchuan said, leading Xiangxi toward the house by the hand.

“Tell me about it. I want to hear.”

“Sigh. While I was away on wedding leave, some things happened at the yamen.” When Yang Tongchuan returned to work today, he sensed the atmosphere was off immediately. After asking around, he found out something had gone wrong.

It happened on the day of Xiangxi’s Return Visit. A wealthy merchant came to the yamen to report that his late wife’s grave had been desecrated. Head Constable Wang led a team to the scene and confirmed it was indeed a case of grave robbing and body snatching. An investigation was launched immediately, but after several days, they had found nothing. Today, the County Magistrate summoned Head Constable Wang and gave him a severe dressing down, warning him that if the case wasn’t solved soon, he would be stripped of his position.

The post of Head Constable was a lucrative one. If Wang were to fall, those waiting in line behind him would be thrilled.

“When I joined this trade, I started under Head Constable Wang. He’s practically my mentor,” Yang explained. “If something happens to him and a new leader takes over, my life won’t be easy.” There were cliques within the constabulary. For a “remnant of the previous administration” like Yang Tongchuan, a change in leadership would not be friendly.

“Why would anyone steal a body? Is it useful for something?” When Xiangxi was a child fleeing disaster with his brother, he had seen unclaimed bodies by the roadside; everyone avoided them. He couldn’t fathom why someone would go out of their way to steal one.

“Head Constable Wang initially thought it was for funerary objects or a ‘ghost marriage’ (matching the dead). But the merchant’s wife died before he made his fortune; she wasn’t buried with anything valuable. They checked the surrounding areas, and there’s no local custom of ghost marriages. We truly can’t figure out why anyone would steal a female corpse that has been buried for years.”

There had been no natural disasters or wars recently, and the common folk were living in peace. Even crimes like arson and murder had decreased. No one knew where these body snatchers had come from.

At dinner, the day’s frustrations didn’t dampen Yang Tongchuan’s appetite; he finished two bowls of rice before setting down his chopsticks. Xiangxi served him a bowl of soup to round off the meal. Afterward, everyone retired to their rooms.

Xiangxi’s constitution was weak, and the doctor had advised moderation in their “marital affairs.” Consequently, the past few nights had been quite painful for Yang Tongchuan.

Tonight, however, Xiangxi was thinking about the day’s conversation. His mind, though simple, worked in its own way. As they lay in bed, Yang was still brooding over the case. He had spent the day interviewing the merchant’s neighbors; they all said the man was a well-known wealthy resident who was kind and had no known enemies.

A tingling sensation spread across Yang’s chest. He looked down to see Xiangxi leaning against him, his small hand tracing patterns restlessly.

“Still thinking about the case?” Xiangxi’s voice was as soft as his person.

“Mmh,” Yang’s voice shifted an octave.

“Humans eat grains and meat; how could they be like immortals, never making mistakes or making enemies? I think if it’s not for money, then it’s to spite someone, or maybe someone just finds that rich landlord eyesore,” Xiangxi said casually, knowing nothing of criminal investigation. His hand, however, was mimicking the techniques he’d seen in the “secret books,” learning by doing.

“Mm—wait, what did you just say?” Yang Tongchuan suddenly caught onto something.

“I said… maybe they dug it up just to spite him?” Xiangxi was startled by Yang’s sudden change in tone.

“Why would you think that?” Yang’s mouth was discussing business, but his hands were no longer behaving.

“Unless there’s a deep-seated grudge, who would do something so morally bankrupt? Besides, the wealthier people are, the more they believe in ghosts and gods. Maybe the culprit is targeting the merchant himself,” Xiangxi recalled how “particular” the successful ship captains at the docks were about metaphysics. Xiangxi didn’t understand it, but he believed in it.

“You have a point. I’ll mention this to Head Constable Wang tomorrow. So… are you feeling better? All recovered?”

Xiangxi sometimes admired Yang Tongchuan’s thick skin. Given what they were doing at this very moment, the man could still hold a perfectly serious conversation.

“Mmh… I’m fine now,” Xiangxi lowered his head shyly.

“So you’ve tasted the sweetness and learned to take the initiative?” Yang thought he was so impressive his tail would wag to the heavens if he had one.

“If you’re tired, then forget it. Let’s sleep,” Xiangxi whispered, thinking he had been too bold and annoyed Yang. He moved to give up.

“If you want it, tell your husband. Your husband has the strength to keep you full; don’t be shy.” Yang Tongchuan quickly turned the tables, reclaiming his dominance in this “exercise.”

Xiangxi wasn’t as timid as he had been at first. He was learning to accept this part of life, even trying to enjoy it as much as Yang did. Tonight, Xiangxi was exceptionally passionate, causing Yang to unlock several new “skills.”

“If you’re uncomfortable, tell me. Don’t hold it in,” Yang said, gently pulling Xiangxi’s hand away from his mouth. “Why bite yourself? If you can’t help it, bite me. I like it when you bite me.”

Xiangxi didn’t hold back; he bit down on Yang’s shoulder. With his strength, it felt like a kitten whose teeth hadn’t fully grown. It didn’t hinder Yang Tongchuan’s “early morning exercise” in the slightest.

In the East Side Room Parents’ Room

“Old man, do you hear that? Is that noise coming from Er-lang’s room?” Mother Yang was calculating the family expenses and had stayed up later than usual.

“Er-lang is at that age where his blood is hot. If there weren’t any noise every day, then you should be worried,” Father Yang replied. He’d been young once; it was nothing to be surprised about.

“That boy doesn’t know how to treasure people. With that kind of tossing around, can Xixi handle it?” Mother Yang listened for a while; Yang Tongchuan showed no signs of stopping.

“You’ve got too much time on your hands. Go to sleep.” Father Yang didn’t want to deal with her and lay down first.

“You old thing, you’re useless for everything.” Mother Yang cursed under her breath but made a mental note to have Yanzi soak some red dates for Xiangxi tomorrow to replenish his qi and blood.

In the East Wing, Yang Tongshan also heard something, though it was muffled by the distance. His own wife was on her period and in a bad mood, meaning he had no “meat” to eat.

“You’re not asleep yet?” As a long-married couple, Ming Le knew by his breathing alone whether her husband was awake.

“Just about to. I was just thinking about a few pawned items at the shop that are about to expire.”

“Still nothing this month. I don’t want to drink those medicines anymore; they’re useless.”

“Then don’t drink them. Maybe it’ll happen once you stop.”

“What if it never happens?” Ming Le whispered. “How about… the day after tomorrow is your day off, why don’t you go to the country estate and—”

“If you try to test me like that again, I will truly be angry.” Yang Tongshan, who was usually perfectly obedient to Ming Le, showed a rare flash of temper tonight.