His Sunday Substitute - Chapter 48

Realizing today might be the end of her life

Qin Cangye packed a lot of food from the restaurant.

Su Yinuo wasn’t picky, so he got a little of everything, including fruit and desserts for after the meal. Worried she might not have much of an appetite, he also packed some sweet congee. Besides that, he picked up a carton of yogurt from the supermarket near the restaurant, planning to store it in the suite’s fridge so Su Yinuo could grab one whenever she wanted later.

Afraid he might have overlooked something, he took his time, but then worried Su Yinuo might be waiting impatiently, he quickly picked up his pace.

This cautious state didn’t irritate him at all. As long as it was for Su Yinuo, no matter how troublesome, he found it delightful and fulfilling.

After venting his emotions thoroughly all afternoon and soaking in the warm bathtub with Su Yinuo in his arms, his mood had improved significantly. His anger had mostly dissipated, and as he stepped out to buy things, his body felt incredibly light, as if the boulder weighing on his heart had been shattered. He even felt a surge of confidence, convinced he could win Su Yinuo’s heart back.

After all, recalling the past, it was a fact that Su Yinuo had preferred him.

He still believed Su Yinuo had relationships with those men, perhaps still entangled with Ji Wenjun, or maybe she had developed feelings for Qin Wangxuan without his knowledge. But he didn’t blame her. He thought it was her softness, kindness, and sentimentality that made her unable to refuse the men who approached her. And he was one of those she couldn’t refuse.

But I’m better-looking than Ji Wenjun and Qin Wangxuan, right? I’m richer than them, right? I care about her more than they do, right? I can make her feel good too, we’re perfectly compatible in bed.

After making these comparisons, Qin Cangye’s confidence grew even firmer.

If she can’t refuse others, then I’ll just keep a close eye on her from now on and make sure she doesn’t interact with other men. I’ll tell Wang Yiliu to assign her directly to my work, or maybe just move her desk into my office.

But that might be distracting. If Su Yinuo keeps swaying in front of me with her pretty, adorable face every day, how am I supposed to focus on work?

I really want to lay her out on the desk and…

At this thought, Qin Cangye abruptly stopped walking, his ears turning red.

Shaking off the wild thoughts in his head, he took a deep breath and stepped into the elevator.

Qin Cangye had never considered himself to have psychological issues. The painful memories from his childhood that had shattered his mind had long been erased by his own will. The eight years of therapy that followed were nothing more than what he saw as Qin Weishu’s methods of tormenting him.

After reaching adulthood, he never saw a psychologist again. He knew his emotions were prone to extreme fluctuations, but he also knew how to restrain them and how to vent them properly. He had never made a mistake in crucial situations, so he firmly believed there was nothing wrong with him.

Four years ago, that sudden episode had shaken his self-perception slightly. But afterward, he couldn’t clearly recall what had happened. Faced with Qin Weishu’s accusations after rushing back from abroad, he flew into a rage, adamantly refusing to follow Qin Weishu’s arrangements for treatment. In the end, he simply dismissed the episode as an isolated incident caused by a momentary loss of control.

He never believed he was ill, never believed there was anything wrong with the overwhelming adoration, the obsessive greed, the possessive fixation, or the increasingly twisted desires he harboured for Su Yinuo. He could never imagine himself harming Su Yinuo, for she was a treasure far more precious than his own life.

He had never thought that one day, standing before Su Yinuo, he would be seized by the impulse to kill her.

He had already reached the bedroom door and saw Su Yinuo standing on the open balcony. The crimson plaid dress stabbed at his eyes, stirring within him an inexplicable fury and hatred.

The items in his hands clattered to the floor. He took a step forward, then abruptly halted.

The red dress billowed in the cold night wind. She stood on the balcony, arms wrapped around herself, shivering from the cold, looking exactly like that…

The scene before him suddenly began to tremble, distort, then violently rewind, as if caught in a torrent of time reversal, dragging Qin Cangye back seventeen years.

Seventeen years ago, on that night, the dim bedroom had been filled with nothing but fear, rage, and sorrow.

Agony tore through Qin Cangye’s entire being. He trembled, just like that ten-year-old child, and let out a hoarse roar: “What the hell are you doing?! Did you even watch over my mother? She’s dead, why are you wearing her dress? What the hell are you doing?!”

Shattered, dizzying spots of light clouded his vision. The face he could no longer see had completely transformed into the terrified expression of that vain maid from his childhood.

“Get out of the Qin family! No, you can’t just leave. You should go to hell, you should die, you should pay with your life for my mother’s!”

Su Yinuo, standing on the balcony, was terrified. Fear made her numb to the biting night wind as she stood frozen before the railing. She couldn’t understand a single word Qin Cangye was saying. His state was nothing like the remorse and self-blame Qin Weishu had described, it was hatred, deep and searing.

Seeing Qin Cangye advance, she hastily took a step back, pressing herself against the railing of the thirty-sixth-floor balcony.

Suddenly, a fierce gust of wind swept through, lifting Su Yinuo’s long black hair. The howling wind carried icy raindrops that splashed against her bare shoulders and neck. Trembling, she hugged her arms and glanced back at the dark abyss behind her.

A profound regret, an overwhelming unwillingness, and despair surged from the depths of her heart. She realized she had been deceived, and that today might very well be the end of her life.

There was no escape. She had no strength left, and after standing on the balcony in a dress for ten minutes on this winter night, her body was so stiff she could barely lift a hand.

It seemed like the end, but she didn’t want this, didn’t want to die at Qin Cangye’s hands and leave him drowning in endless guilt and torment. She had wanted to help him, not destroy him.

Tears streamed down her face as she looked at Qin Cangye, who had completely lost his senses and was relentlessly advancing toward her. Sobbing, she said, “I love you, Qin Cangye. Remember that I love you. I want you to live well. This isn’t your fault. No matter what you see when you come to your senses, none of this is your fault.”

Qin Cangye suddenly halted, stopping just a meter away from Su Yinuo.

Behind him came the violent sound of someone pounding on the door, as if someone outside was shouting a name.

But Qin Cangye seemed to hear nothing. The world before him had turned into chaos, with only hatred driving him forward. Yet, in a few fleeting moments, his muddled mind suddenly cleared, filling him with despair as he realized that the other self within him was about to kill the person he loved most.

No, this can’t happen!!!

His soul trembled in terror. There was no time to hate the out-of-control version of himself, he could only beg for someone to appear and stop him, even if it meant killing him. He didn’t care!

Please, please, someone save Su Yinuo. Someone save my Su Yinuo!!

His face twisted grotesquely, half filled with hatred, the other half streaked with tears. Slowly, he raised his hand toward Su Yinuo, his voice hoarse and strained as he forced out the words, “Nuo… don’t… don’t stand there. It’s dangerous.”

Yet his hand clamped down tightly on Su Yinuo’s shoulder.

BANG!!!

The door was flung open, and two frantic figures appeared at the bedroom entrance.

“Qin Cangye, stop!” Qin Wangxuan shouted, lunging at him. Using his uninjured arm, he shoved Qin Cangye with all his weight, knocking him to the ground.

Wang Yiliu rushed in right after, wrapping her arms around Su Yinuo, who stood frozen and shivering at the edge of the balcony.

…

After that day, Su Yinuo fell seriously ill.

Burning with fever for days, she drifted in and out of consciousness in the hospital for nearly a week before slowly regaining her senses. During that time, she vaguely sensed many people coming and going around her, their voices clamoring indistinctly. But she couldn’t make out a single word.

When she finally regained clarity and could see the world before her, the only person she found at her bedside was Qin Wangxuan.

“Where’s Qin Cangye?” she rasped.

“You’re awake! You’re finally awake!” Qin Wangxuan exclaimed, jumping to his feet and pressing the call button beside the bed. “I’ll get the doctor to check on you!”

“Where is Qin Cangye?!” Su Yinuo pushed herself up, her voice urgent and her emotions raw. When Qin Wangxuan hesitated, she stretched out a frail hand and demanded, “Give me my phone. I need to call Qin Cangye!”

“He… probably can’t be reached right now,” Qin Wangxuan replied cautiously, not handing over the phone.

“Why?” Tears rolled down Su Yinuo’s pale face. After a few stunned seconds, her lips trembled as she whimpered pitifully, “I need to see him. I need to tell him it was my fault, that I listened to Qin Weishu’s words and provoked him. It wasn’t his doing. I’m afraid he’ll overthink it, that he’ll do something reckless in a moment of despair. Please, bring him to me, won’t you?”

Fresh from her illness, even her lips were drained of color. The way she trembled and wept made her seem unbearably fragile and heart-wrenching.

Unable to bear seeing her like this, Qin Wangxuan walked over and gently patted her back, comforting her, “Don’t worry, he’ll be fine. He’s seeing a psychologist.”

Su Yinuo stopped crying and looked up at Qin Wangxuan in surprise.

“The psychologist said his condition wasn’t caused by just one or two incidents. It was the result of long-term childhood repression and the outburst from that one event. By the way, you still don’t know what really happened back then, do you?”

Qin Wangxuan helped Su Yinuo sit up, handed her a cup of warm water, and then sat down beside her, revealing the truth about Li Ruyin’s death.

After he finished, the doctor came in to examine Su Yinuo. She remained silent the entire time, only speaking up calmly after the doctor left: “Why are you telling me all this? And why did you save me? What’s your stance in all this?”

Qin Wangxuan gave a bitter smile, adjusting her IV drip as he replied, “There’s a lot you don’t know. Focus on recovering first, and I’ll tell you everything.”

For the rest of the afternoon, Qin Wangxuan stayed in the hospital room, explaining his true relationship with Qin Cangye and their plan to overthrow Qin Weishu together.

Then he updated her on Qin Cangye’s treatment: “He’s currently at Qiyuan Sanatorium. His doctor recommended a phased treatment plan. The first stage is isolation, keeping him away from anything or anyone that might trigger memories of his childhood. He needs to let go of all his emotional burdens and undergo medication until he can face his past traumas with clarity and calm. This stage won’t take too long, anywhere from a month to six months.”

“A month… I won’t be able to see him for a whole month?” Su Yinuo lowered her head, staring at her fingers tangled in her hair as tears rolled down her cheeks one by one.

“Just one month, why are you crying again?” Qin Wangxuan quickly grabbed some tissues, reaching out to wipe her tears, but Su Yinuo snatched them away.

Watching her huddle into a pitiful ball, wiping her tears furiously, Qin Wangxuan leaned on the hospital bed, tilting his head to look at her. He poked her leg lightly and said, “Sis, before he went into the sanatorium, he asked me to take good care of you.”