Frivolous - Chapter 24

Chapter 24

Her beautiful dream had only just begun.

Without waiting for an answer, her hand moved downward once more. A weak sound escaped Yu Lanzhou’s lips.

Chen Ran marveled silently: She is so soft. Her body is soft, her ears are soft, and even her heart is soft.

But the more submissive Yu Lanzhou became, the stronger the jealousy grew in Chen Ran’s heart. She didn’t understand what stood between Yu Lanzhou and Zhou Jingting what could possibly exist between them to make Yu Lanzhou go to this extent?

But on second thought, what right did she have to be jealous? Only in this moment did she have the right to love. The right to love tenderly.

Watching Yu Lanzhou’s expression closely, Chen Ran shifted her movements, a “flower” tracing its way up Yu Lanzhou’s leg.

Before kissing the bloom, Chen Ran lowered her already deep voice even further and asked, “Can I do this?”

Yu Lanzhou’s face was flushed, yet she offered no resistance. She had never experienced anything like this. She could feel that it was Chen Ran’s first time too; it was clumsy and fumbling, yet handled with cautious care.

When flower kissed flower, Chen Ran’s tears fell uncontrollably onto Yu Lanzhou. Through her blurred vision, she saw the tiny red mole in Yu Lanzhou’s eye become enchantingly vivid.

Those lips, already kissed to ripeness, were claimed once more by Chen Ran. Covering, turning, grinding, lingering.

That terrifying desire surfaced again: she wanted to consume Yu Lanzhou. And she was consuming her, stroke by stroke.

Coincidence, intersection. Fireworks. Crimson roses. White light.

After an unknown amount of time, the waves settled. A sliver of hazy light filtered through the curtains. Chen Ran’s intoxication had completely vanished, her upper body exposed to the air. Feeling a bit cold, she wrapped herself in the quilt, her hand still tightly clutching Yu Lanzhou’s, refusing to let go. Her eyelids drooped as she drifted into sleep.

A while later, Yu Lanzhou withdrew her hand, stood up, wrapped herself in a robe, and went to another room.

When Yu Lanzhou finished showering and returned to the room to retrieve her misplaced clothes, Chen Ran was huddled under the covers, one eye half-open. The floor lamp remained lit in the semi-bright room.

“Are you awake?” Yu Lanzhou knew Chen Ran was pretending to sleep.

“I am,” Chen Ran’s voice was half-hidden under the quilt as she spoke bashfully. “We… I… last night… why am I here?”

Yu Lanzhou was dressed in a white silk shirt and a black tailored pencil skirt. Her lips were slightly redder than before. She was methodically adjusting her cuffs. Looking at the reflection of Chen Ran wrapped only in a white quilt through the mirror, she said calmly, “You were drunk.”

That’s not what I was asking.

Chen Ran knew clearly that everything last night wasn’t a dream. Yu Lanzhou’s moans, her soft body and tongue. Their intertwined breaths. And… the white light.

“Why did you come to Linxi…” Chen Ran bit her lip, asking nervously.

“What do you think?” Yu Lanzhou looked up at her, walking toward the head of the bed. She stopped less than a meter away and picked up the sandalwood necklace from the nightstand. As she tried to put it on, perhaps her hands were shaking, but the clasp failed to catch several times.

Chen Ran’s heart skipped a beat. She saw the faint red marks on Yu Lanzhou’s neck that hadn’t fully faded. Instinctively, she wanted to reach out and help her guide the clasp into place. But as soon as she moved, the quilt slipped, exposing her. She could only watch.

Glancing at Yu Lanzhou’s wrist beneath her long sleeve, she noticed faint red welts there too. A question surfaced: Did I actually… restrain her last night?

Yu Lanzhou walked to the mirror, pulling her curls out from under the necklace and smoothing her sleeves. With a tone of feigned naturalness, she said, “Stay in Linxi for a few days to have fun before heading back. Don’t be too late.”

This sentence seemed to hum with care for her. Chen Ran’s heart felt as if it were being eaten away bit by bit, burned through until not even ash remained. Her heart tugged at her fingers, and a warm, damp resonance of the previous night rose in her fingertips.

Her eyelashes fluttered rapidly, her earlobes turning a deep red. She murmured, “But we…”

Yu Lanzhou shot her a side-glance through the mirror. Chen Ran swallowed the words she hadn’t intended to say aloud anyway.

“Nothing happened,” Yu Lanzhou said tonelessly. She turned back and looked at her. “Do you remember that?”

Usually, this is where it would end—a fleeting affair never to be revisited. But Chen Ran shifted the conversation, turning a corner into the unexpected.

She stared at the necklace on Yu Lanzhou’s neck, then moved her gaze to the red marks on her wrist. Her nose stung instinctively, and tears fell without warning. She asked with a sob, “Did I… force you?”

Yu Lanzhou’s expression turned visibly displeased. Who could possibly force me?

“I’m not using the alcohol as an excuse, but I really have some gaps in my memory. I don’t know… I don’t know if I forced it.”

“There was no forcing,” Yu Lanzhou looked at her own wrist, following Chen Ran’s gaze. “You didn’t force me.”

“If it wasn’t forced, can I ask you why? Why didn’t you reject me? Was it because of Zhou Jingting?”

Yu Lanzhou neither admitted nor denied it. She simply waited for Chen Ran’s next words.

“You aren’t with her yet, right? …Do you need me to do anything?”

At the first question, Yu Lanzhou’s eyes flickered away. “I only need you to forget.”

“I’m afraid I can’t forget,” Chen Ran gave a bitter smile, one that felt like a sour hawthorn berry. How could she forget? She wouldn’t forget for the rest of her life.

“Then what are you thinking?” What do you think is the next step after getting me and sleeping with me?

Yu Lanzhou walked two steps toward the door and placed a neatly folded pile of washed and dried clothes by the bed. “Xu Wan prepared these on short notice, but they should fit.”

Chen Ran remembered what Yu Zhou had told her—that Yu Lanzhou adopted her out of spite against Zhou Jingting. Clenching the white bedding in her palms, she asked in a tiny voice, “Do you need me?”

“Why do you ask that?”

“I need you to need me.” Only if you need me can I shamelessly have a reason to stay by your side. My status is different from Yu Zhou’s, but my function can be the same—I can be your pawn.

“What can you do?”

“Anything, as long as I can be near you. I’ll do whatever you want me to do. I only hope you can come see me occasionally, or let me come see you. Just treat me like a kitten you’re raising—I’ll be very good. Can I?”

“Even if it’s just staying by your side temporarily. A year, half a year, a month, a day.”

Chen Ran thought for a second, then shook her head seriously. “No, no, a day isn’t enough.”

Yu Lanzhou looked at the girl huddled obediently in the quilt; she really did have the delicate charm of a kitten. “Is a month enough, then?” she asked, feeling a sudden urge to tease her.

“…Yes.” If she truly had such a month, Chen Ran would spend it like a festival before the end of the world.

Chen Ran ignored everything else, rising to take Yu Lanzhou’s hand. She pressed her face into Yu Lanzhou’s palm, rubbing against it gently. “Yes. Just… use me however you like.”

Yu Lanzhou’s palm felt as if it had been touched by fire. She withdrew her hand and said, “It’s not about ‘using’ you.” She pulled the quilt back over Chen Ran, her tone slightly helpless. “Chen Ran, let me think about it, alright?”

Chen Ran rose from the bed, using the quilt to cover her movements as she dressed. A muffled voice came from under the fabric: “Okay! I know! I understand! I’m not in a hurry, but can you please not reject me too quickly either?”

Yu Lanzhou didn’t answer.

Afraid she would leave, Chen Ran poked her head out from a gap in the quilt and saw a pair of deep, indigo eyes—so profound one could easily drown in them. Outside the window, the sea was vast and bright.

She asked the deep sea once more, “Can I?”

Yu Lanzhou nodded.

“Are you going back to Beijing? Can you wait a moment? I’ll make you breakfast. Is porridge okay? The corn porridge I make is very fragrant.” Chen Ran, wearing only a top and underwear, hurriedly got out of bed and stepped into her slippers. Standing before Yu Lanzhou, she asked, “Also, do you need any medicine? I saw your neck looked quite red. Do you have a fever?”

Yu Lanzhou shook her head first, then said, “Chen Ran, this is my house.”

“Huh?” Chen Ran didn’t understand why she suddenly said that.

“It’s been empty for a long time. There are no ingredients.”

“I’ll go buy some now!” Chen Ran hopped off the bed and ran toward the door.

“No need.” Yu Lanzhou didn’t explain why and quickly walked out of the bedroom.

As soon as she got into the car, Xu Wan asked cautiously, “Are you having an allergic reaction?”

Yu Lanzhou gave a faint “Mhm.”

Xu Wan told the driver to pull over. As she got out, she said, “I’ll go buy medicine.”

Chen Ran felt that after Yu Lanzhou left, all the air in the house had left with her.

The panic and helplessness she felt when she woke up after a short nap weren’t faked. She constantly felt it was a beautiful illusion. So much so that even when fully awake, she found it hard to believe. She couldn’t believe she had really “gotten” Yu Lanzhou.

She wanted to cry. She even wanted to slap herself—why did it have to happen while she was drunk? Why was it that events from just a few hours ago were already starting to fade? She only remembered that later on, she had stopped being gentle; her intrusion became difficult and laced with a certain ferocity.

She vaguely remembered Yu Lanzhou shedding tears, grabbing her hand, and hoarsely telling her to stop. Only now did Chen Ran notice the scratches on the back of her hand; the skin was slightly broken, though it didn’t hurt. But seeing Yu Lanzhou pretend to be unbothered that morning made Chen Ran’s heart feel so full, yet so empty, and so painful.

What on earth did I do? Taking advantage of someone? How shameless.

But mostly, it was a shameless joy a joy that completely clouded her mind, leaving her with no strength to consider anything else. Her heart hammered, seemingly incapable of stopping.

She instinctively found her phone and unlocked it. More than a dozen missed calls. Dozens of messages on WeChat. Among them, she saw a name she hadn’t seen in a long time.

It was a message from Su Ping’an:

Where are you? Are you okay? Can we meet?

Since lending her the motorcycle on May 14th, Su Ping’an had disappeared. Later, Chen Ran heard from a nurse that a woman with a faint mole on her ear had visited her while she was in the hospital. It was Su Ping’an. She likely knew her gamble had won, so she hadn’t met her again.

Chen Ran couldn’t describe her feelings it was strange and awkward. It felt as if she had used many people. Her index finger tapped twice on the side of the phone, and then she replied with two messages:

I’m okay. I’m sorry.] [I’m sorry. And thank you. Really.

The “I’m sorry” in the first message was for not being in contact. The second message was the answer: We cannot meet.

The current Chen Ran was like a startled bird. She had finally seen a glimmer of happiness; she couldn’t allow that hope to vanish in an instant.

Su: Chen Ran, I didn’t run away. When I left, I told you to wait for me to come back. Su: To be honest, I’m truly floored by your gambler’s mentality. I really… admire it.

Chen Ran didn’t reply again. She called her manager, Ruan Qinglu, but it took a dozen seconds for the call to connect. Chen Ran had barely started her apology when she was interrupted. Ruan Qinglu said, “I’m being serious, not acting out of spite. You don’t need to apologize to me; you did nothing wrong.” She added, “You bought a fake flight ticket; were you intentionally trying to avoid everyone?”

“I didn’t want anyone to find me at the time.” Chen Ran told the truth. She didn’t want anyone to find her except Yu Lanzhou. After apologizing repeatedly, Chen Ran hung up, thinking the matter had been reasonably resolved.

After learning from Xu Wan that Yu Lanzhou was in Beijing, Chen Ran returned the next day. This relationship couldn’t be allowed to cool down; once Yu Lanzhou thought things through, Chen Ran would be finished.

The first moment she saw Yu Zhou after entering, the girl didn’t fly toward her as usual. Instead, she stood by the spiral mahogany staircase, one hand on the railing. Chen Ran rubbed her nose, feeling guilty, and called out, “Xiao Zhou.”

“Mhm. Sister, you’re back.” Her feet didn’t move.

“Mhm.”

“Was Linxi fun?”

Chen Ran sensed a hint of blame in Yu Zhou’s words. She walked over, placed her hands on Yu Zhou’s shoulders, and gently massaged them. “It was okay.”

Yu Zhou tilted her head, saw the scratches on Chen Ran’s hand, and said expressionlessly, “Dinner is almost ready. Sister, go wash your hands.”

Yu Lanzhou also returned for the evening meal. The expensive white dress she wore looked even more noble on her, and a black belt emphasized her slender waist. Her vacant gaze flicked toward Chen Ran, making Chen Ran’s heart race once more.

Chen Ran sat next to Yu Zhou, taking small sips from a glass. There was spicy chicken on the table Yu Zhou’s favorite and she ate while tears fell. Twice, Chen Ran passed her tissues, but they were ignored. The meal was terrifying and tasteless. Chen Ran instinctively looked at Yu Lanzhou’s expression; she remained expressionless.

Sensing Chen Ran looking at her several times, Yu Lanzhou put down her chopsticks and turned toward her. “There’s a music festival on the 6th of next month. Your new manager has already verbally accepted it for you. Any issues?”

“New manager?” Chen Ran choked on her food. Yu Zhou wordlessly pushed the tissue box toward her.

Yu Lanzhou nodded. Chen Ran finally dared to make brief eye contact. She wanted to ask, “What about Teacher Ruan?” But she didn’t. She realized it was because of her. When she had called Ruan Qinglu earlier, she hadn’t noticed anything abnormal. What have I done?

Chen Ran pulled out a tissue and dabbed at her eyes. “No. No problem.”

The phone on the table lit up. Chen Ran unlocked it to check, then immediately pressed it off and looked at Yu Lanzhou unnaturally. It seemed Yu Lanzhou saw it, but also seemed as if she wasn’t looking.

After dinner, Yu Lanzhou went to the study and stayed there until 11:00 PM. After showering, Chen Ran paced outside the study in her pajamas. The sound of music was drifting out—a recording of the violin concerto The Butterfly Lovers performed by the Yuanshan Symphony Orchestra. She couldn’t be mistaken; that was Yu Lanzhou’s second performance at the Haisheng Arts Hall when she was twenty-four.

Even after the music ended, Chen Ran didn’t dare push the door open. The phone in her pocket vibrated. It was a message from Yu Lanzhou: Why are you pacing at the door?

Chen Ran’s heart leaped how did she know it was her? She replied: Can I come in?] Yu replied: Mhm.

Chen Ran gave two symbolic knocks and entered.

“What is it?” Yu Lanzhou leaned against the sofa, her hand supporting her forehead, eyes half-closed.

Chen Ran didn’t sit. She clasped her hands in front of her, looked down, and said, “I… I want to move back.”

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