For the One Who Hates Me - Chapter 26

At that moment, Aura was reading a book on magic in front of a candle. She had borrowed it from the library on her way back from the funeral. She hoped to get a small hint on how to break the seal.

Knock, knock.

Aura looked up at the knock. “Come in.”

The door opened, and a maid on night duty came in.

“What is it at this late hour?”

“Your Majesty, the Head Knight is here.”

‘Josh?’ Aura put on her robe over her nightgown and went outside. Josh was pacing anxiously outside the door.

“Josh?”

“Your Majesty the Empress. I apologize for coming at such a late hour.” Josh bowed quickly.

“What’s the matter? As you said, it’s very late.”

“Well… actually, His Majesty the Emperor has been suffering from nightmares for several days. He hasn’t been able to sleep at all since Prince Isen passed away.”

‘So that was it. I knew his complexion wasn’t good.’ She was worried, but she also remembered what he had said on their walk. The voice that said he wouldn’t forgive her if she went into his study again.

Aura crossed her arms and leaned against the doorframe. “So?”

Josh was a little flustered by her indifferent reaction. He had expected Aura to at least pretend to be concerned.

“Well… Your Majesty, if it’s alright with you, would you be able to visit His Majesty’s room just for tonight?”

“I don’t think going will help him.”

“No! Absolutely not. He will find stability when he is with Your Majesty the Empress. Please, I beg you, Your Majesty.”

He was a great subordinate. To go so far for his master. However, Aura didn’t want to grant his request.

“I’m sorry, but there’s nothing I can do. His Majesty the Emperor doesn’t like me being in his space.”

“Pardon?”

“I have nothing more to say. I’ll be going inside now.”

“Y-Your Majesty!” Josh called out to her desperately. But Aura walked back into her room without hesitation.

“Haa… how could she be so heartless?” ‘I thought they were bickering on the surface but were actually in love. I guess I was wrong.’ Josh walked away with his head down.

Aura went back inside and opened her book again. ‘Whether he’s having nightmares or not, I’m not going. Not unless I’ve lost my mind.’

An hour later, Aura was standing in front of Karl’s room.

“Haa…” A sigh escaped her lips. ‘I must be crazy.’ She couldn’t understand herself. She could list a hundred reasons why she hated Karl, so why was she here?

After hesitating for a moment, she knocked on the door. Knock, knock. There was no answer. ‘Is he asleep?’

She thought about leaving but decided to at least make sure he was asleep. His complexion in the afternoon had been truly terrible.

Aura carefully turned the doorknob and opened the door. In the dim light, she saw Karl sitting on the bed. ‘He was awake all this time.’

She slowly stepped inside.

“Ka—”

Thud! A cushion flew past Aura’s face. It fell to her feet harmlessly.

“I said to get out—!” Karl yelled at the door. And then, he saw Aura standing there, her eyes wide with shock. Karl’s expression was the same as hers.

“Oh, right. I’ll leave.” Aura quickly turned around. She felt like anything could be thrown at her. ‘Why did I even come here…?’

As she was mumbling to herself and opening the door, she felt a shadow fall over her. His footsteps were urgent. Click. With his long arm, he closed the door.

Was it because it happened so fast, or was it because of his warmth that she could feel without him touching her? Aura’s heart pounded in her chest. She kept her back to him and tried to sound calm. “You told me to get out.”

“Why did you come here? Were you curious about how broken I am?” His voice was a low growl, foreign to her. He sounded like a wounded animal.

“…Yes. I’ve seen enough. I’ll leave as you wish. Let go of the door.” Aura tried to pull the doorknob, but Karl didn’t take his hand away.

His ragged breathing got closer. He let go of the door and grabbed her arms. Thump. His forehead touched her shoulder. “…Don’t go.”

“What…?”

“Stay with me for just one day.”

“No. How am I supposed to know what you’ll throw at me this time?!”

Karl suddenly hugged Aura tightly from behind. Aura was startled. His body was covered in sweat. She could also smell the strong scent of alcohol.

“Just a few hours. A few hours is all I need.”

“…No.”

“Have mercy on me, Aura.”

“…”

“Please.”

Were those words really coming from Karl? Aura turned around in disbelief. Karl looked like he was about to die. The cold sweat on his forehead and his bloodshot eyes confirmed it.

“…Alright. Let’s go to bed.”

“Haa…” Karl sighed in relief and wiped his face. Aura got into bed first. Karl followed her. He naturally rested his head on her thigh.

“I didn’t say I’d be your pillow.” He didn’t answer. She didn’t know if he was doing it on purpose or if he couldn’t hear her.

The moonlight shone on Karl’s face. His brow was furrowed in pain, and his forehead was beaded with sweat. Aura asked carefully, “…How long has this been happening?”

“It got worse after Tasha died, and it’s been… at its worst since Isen died.”

Aura flinched. She didn’t want to feel guilty, but she couldn’t help it. ‘Just like I lost my parents and brothers, I hope you lose the few people you have left. Whether it’s Isen or Tasha.’

‘I didn’t mean for you to suffer like this.’ And she hadn’t truly wanted them to die. She also hadn’t known that Karl would suffer so much if they did.

Karl, with his eyes half-closed, looked up at her through his sweaty hair. “You still can’t sleep?”

Aura asked. Karl reached out his hand and stroked Aura’s face. He spoke groggily, half-asleep. “The north tower… doesn’t suit you.”

“…”

“I forgot to tell you that… on the walk…”

“…”

“…The important things… I always forget to say them… I’m such a fool.” He sighed and closed his eyes. His hand, which was on her face, slowly moved down her neck and arm. It stopped at her hand. Karl intertwined his fingers with hers and kissed the back of her hand.

Aura quietly chided him. “…You do whatever you want.”

His breathing on the back of her hand was getting more stable. Karl, who she thought was asleep, slowly opened his eyes. “You’re in my dreams all the time.”

‘Am I in his nightmares too?’ “What do I do?”

Karl gripped Aura’s hand even tighter. A smile even crossed his face, as if he found it funny.

“…You’re beautiful.”

After saying that, Karl fell asleep like a lie. Aura’s lips parted a long time after. “What was that? You’re such a fool.” She looked at him with a mix of pity and affection. She gently stroked his hair.

The sun filled the room, and Karl opened his eyes. He sat up and looked around. He was alone in the bed. He still had a bit of a hangover, but his body and mind felt clear. It was a clean, deep sleep he hadn’t had in a long time.

The events of yesterday’s dawn came back to him. He had woken up from a nightmare, drank alcohol to escape his mind, and begged Aura to stay with him. ‘She must have put me to sleep… but I don’t remember much.’

Knock, knock. Theo came into the bedroom. “Your Majesty, you’re awake?”

“Yes. Where’s Aura?”

“Pardon?”

“The empress was here. In the early morning.”

“…I haven’t received any reports about that.”

‘Did Josh call her? It didn’t feel like a dream.’

“Your Majesty, your health hasn’t been very good lately, so I brought the imperial physician.”

“I’ve seen the imperial physician several times. I slept well today, so I’m fine.”

“Still, since he’s already here, why don’t you get an examination?” Theo insisted. Karl found it annoying, but it was more annoying to argue with Theo.

“Alright. Let him in.”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

A moment later, Karl and the imperial physician sat across from each other at the table. He had received some useless sleeping pills a few times before, but this was the first time they were having a serious conversation.

“I know you’ve been suffering from insomnia and nightmares for about three years. When did your condition get worse?”

“It got worse… after I returned to the palace.”

“How is your appetite? Do you have headaches or nausea?”

“There are no problems with my appetite. The only physical problem is the fatigue from not being able to sleep.”

The imperial physician nodded. Karl looked healthy at a glance.

“How do you feel emotionally?”

“Emotionally? What does that have to do with anything?”

“It’s a cautious opinion, but I think we should look into your mental state.”

Karl frowned at the words “mental state.” “I’m fine. I don’t have a mental illness.”

“Yes, yes. I know. But sometimes, mental triggers can manifest themselves physically. In your case, it could be the nightmares.”

It was a plausible theory. Karl fell into deep thought. He realized that the pain came from the nightmares, not the insomnia. The insomnia would only begin after he woke up from a nightmare.

The imperial physician asked carefully, “What kind of nightmares do you have?”

“The people I killed come back and chase me.” His answer was direct and unapologetic. There was no hint of guilt. The imperial physician slowly nodded.

“I apologize for my presumptuousness, but as a physician, I can tell you that no matter how strong a knight is, he cannot kill people without any emotional repercussions.”

“But it’s a knight’s job to kill people when necessary.” Karl said flatly.

“Yes, that is true… but that doesn’t mean they’re not affected. Judging from your personality, it seems you keep all the trauma inside.”

Even so, Karl didn’t want to feel sorry for himself. He just wanted to get better.

“Then give me a prescription for that.”

“I’m sorry, but there is no medicine for that. But… have you ever experienced an improvement in your condition?”

“…What if I have?”

The imperial physician sounded relieved. “Then we have to find a solution within that experience.”

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