Fishing-Type Beauties Will Never Love Crematorium - Chapter 1

“He is moving out this afternoon. Our dorm will finally be comfortable.”

“He does not even stay in the dorm, yet he keeps his bed and desk occupied. As if anyone covets his spot.”

In the classroom, despite the freezing winter outside, the heating made the air feel stifling. Chen Qingtang was sleeping lightly at his desk, one hand cushioning his head while the other draped over his ear. The chaotic chatter from the front row sounded like scattered trash pouring into his ears, causing Chen Qingtang to knit his long, slender brows.

“He is too pretentious. It is annoying just looking at him.”

“Who are you talking about?”

“Chen Qingtang, obviously. A guy who is so obsessed with being fussy and high maintenance.”

Chu Xi heard it too. He rolled his eyes, silently cursing those gossiping wretches. Just as he was about to kick the chair in front of him to teach them a lesson, a slender, fair hand beat him to it, tapping the person’s shoulder.

The tap was not heavy, but it was gentle with a hint of something mischievous.

The person, mid-gossip, jumped in surprise. “Damn, who the hell is that?”

They turned back impatiently, only to be met by a pair of clear, limpid eyes. Because he was half-asleep, his gaze was still somewhat unfocused.

The person recoiled as if shocked by a spring. Oh god!

Chen Qingtang yawned, speaking unhurriedly: “Do not shake the desk by bouncing your leg; you woke me up.”

His voice was still groggy. It sounded like a lazy kitten waking up in the sun; the tone of reproach actually sounded more like a pampered, coquettish grumble.

The most awkward thing in the world is badmouthing someone only to be caught red-handed by the subject themselves. The person’s face flushed bright red, and their voice stiffened. “Oh, sorry.”

Chu Xi giggled, muttering, “Coward.” He pulled out his phone and typed a WeChat message to Chen Qingtang.

Chu Xi: So satisfying! You did not see the look on their faces when they realized you were sitting right behind them. Colorful and spectacular!

Chen Qingtang: [Smile]

Because Chen Qingtang had arrived early today, he had been sleeping with a mask on, so those people had not noticed him.

After dismissing the idiots, Chu Xi put his phone away, feeling bored. He turned his head and noticed that Chen Qingtang was resting his chin on his hand, staring fixedly at a boy sitting diagonally ahead.

The boy had thick eyebrows, deep-set eyes, a high nose bridge, and thin lips. His sharp facial contours made him look as cold and crisp as fresh snow on a high mountain. He was a typical intense-featured handsome guy.

An hour had passed, and the boy was still sitting as straight as he had been before class started. One hand pressed against his book, the other holding a pen, he was focused on reading, his posture impeccable. He was like a lone pine tree standing upright on a cliff.

Chu Xi glanced at Chen Qingtang, then at the boy. “Is Shen He really that good looking?”

Chen Qingtang looked intrigued. “He is sexy.”

Chu Xi looked horrified. “?? Where is he sexy?”

He is a robot who has not moved in half an hour, and his shirt buttons are done up to his throat. What does that have to do with being sexy?

Chen Qingtang tapped his cheek with his finger, smiling playfully. No one knew how alluring Shen He looked when he took off his glasses, his gaze as deep as the ocean, staring at him. No one knew how mesmerizing those long, bony hands now holding a pen were when they ignited flames all over his body, or how the scorching fingertips tracing his spine made him tremble and sink into oblivion.

And every time Shen He repressed his desire, his low, magnetic voice sounded like a taut string about to snap, yet still trying to maintain gentlemanly politeness: “Hold on a little longer, I have a while to go.” That hand, with its bulging veins, gripping Chen Qingtang’s trembling legs with absolute possessiveness.

Only Chen Qingtang knew about these intoxicating contradictions of Shen He.

Chu Xi looked at his spring-like expression and pouted. “Taken a liking to him?”

Chen Qingtang’s cold eyebrows and eyes slowly softened, like spring breaking through winter. “Yeah.”

It was simpler and more reasonable than explaining he was a reborn soul and Shen He was his husband from his previous life. He had been reborn for over a month, mostly during winter break, so this was his first time seeing Shen He.

Chu Xi covered his mouth in mock surprise, his expression exaggerated. “Oh my god, how rare. If you do not make a move on this now, the opportunity will cool down.”

They had grown up together, and he had never seen Chen Qingtang take a liking to anyone.

Chu Xi: “Shen He has a nickname. It is cheesy but accurate. Do you know it?”

Chen Qingtang: “What?”

Chu Xi gloated: “The Cold Robot.”

If you do not know Shen He well, no matter what you say to him, he will brush you off with “Hmm,” “Okay,” “No,” or “Thanks.” His personality is cold, and his actions are like a machine, hence the name Cold Robot. When freshmen started, many were seduced by Shen He’s hormone-exploding handsome face and cold, charming aura, flocking to him. But because of his Cold Robot personality, their enthusiasm was extinguished after a few interactions, and they retreated in defeat.

Chen Qingtang just raised an eyebrow. “So what?”

Chu Xi: “This is a high-end game. How do you plan to hook this high-mountain flower?”

Chen Qingtang hummed for a long time. “You should be asking how to make this high-mountain flower hook himself onto me.”

The best hunters often appear as prey.

Chu Xi widened his eyes, then chuckled wickedly two seconds later, wearing an expression that said, “You are crazy, but I appreciate it.”

The bell rang, and the classroom instantly grew noisy with shouting, joking, and the sound of chairs dragging across the floor.

Chu Xi slung his bag over his shoulder. “Let us go. You have to move into your dorm this afternoon, right? I will help you.”

Chen Qingtang was still watching Shen He, packing his books while looking, his expression thoughtful.

Chu Xi reached out to hook his leg, wanting to shove his head onto Shen He. “Still looking? If you like him that much, just go over and ask for his WeChat.”

Chen Qingtang said unhurriedly: “No, he has to ask for mine.”

“He has to be the one to add me, to approach me, to pursue me.”

Chu Xi’s scoff was loud and mocking. “Your ego is huge, and your skin is thick. You must be quite durable if you get hit.”

The two walked out of the classroom together. They had already passed Shen He’s seat, but Chu Xi suddenly noticed Chen Qingtang had not followed. Looking back, he saw Chen Qingtang taking advantage of the crowd to accidentally drop his campus card onto the umbrella by Shen He’s feet.

Chu Xi: “??!!”

Outside the classroom, Chu Xi kept looking back, wanting to see if Shen He would pick up that card. Seeing he was about to walk into a wall, Chen Qingtang grabbed his head with one hand and turned it back around.

Chu Xi slowly gave a thumbs up. “You are really confident. What if he does not pick it up? What if he picks it up but does not contact you or return it?”

Chen Qingtang just hooked his lips nonchalantly.

When the classroom was mostly empty, Shen He closed his book with one hand and packed his things to leave. Just then, his roommate called. Shen He put on his Bluetooth headset, his voice clean and cold, like the drizzling rain and snow outside: “What is it?”

In such freezing weather, his roommate had skipped class and was comfortably huddled in the dorm eating. “Shen Ge, do you know that we are getting a new roommate?”

Shen He: “Hmm. I saw the notice.”

It was already the second semester of freshman year, so there should not be changes, but someone had left their dorm last semester, so it was normal to have someone move in now.

Wei Yan: “His name is Chen Qingtang. Do you have an impression of him?”

Shen He neatly stacked his books out of habit before putting them in his bag. “No.”

Wei Yan raised his volume: “Chen Qingtang! Class 2. The one who tied for first in grades with you last semester. Any impression now?”

Shen He was very focused on his grades: “I remember.”

Shen He was someone who valued efficiency, never wasting time or energy on meaningless social relations. So, even though their classes often overlapped, Shen He did not know Chen Qingtang, only his name, and did not even know what he looked like.

Wei Yan: “The new roommate concerns the harmony of our dorm for the next three and a half years. Shen Ge, you should at least care…”

Wei Yan was still chattering away, but Shen He had already put on his bag to leave. When he bent down to pick up his umbrella from the floor, he saw a campus card stuck in the umbrella frame. He picked it up to examine it.

The card had a photo of its owner, a stunning boy with delicate features. He was gazing at the camera, but his eyes were unfocused, as if he had been daydreaming when the shutter clicked. Shen He now had a concrete impression of Chen Qingtang: good grades and good looking.

Wei Yan: “Hello? Are you still listening? I am talking about the new roommate?”

Shen He was silent for two seconds: “The new roommate is Chen Qingtang, Business Management Class 2, student ID 2023020219, right.”

Wei Yan was stunned: “Ah, yeah. Did you run a background check on him? How do you know his student ID?”

Shen He wiped the campus card with a tissue and put it in his pocket: “I found his campus card.”

Wei Yan: “Hey, is that not a coincidence.”

Now Shen He had to care, whether he wanted to or not.

Wei Yan: “He is moving in tonight. Shen Ge, you should come back tonight to meet him. Since you are the dorm leader.”

Because Shen He rented a place off-campus, his roommate specifically called to remind him.

Wei Yan: “It just so happens you can return his card. He is probably anxious about losing it.”

Shen He said “Hmm”: “Tell him not to worry. I have something to do this afternoon, but I will return to the dorm tonight to give him the card.”

After saying that, Shen He hung up. As he walked, he created a note on his phone and set an alarm. The note had only one sentence: Return to the dorm at 8 PM to return the campus card.

Shen He was just that kind of person, straightforward, serious, and disciplined.

Around 7:40 PM, Wei Yan was the first to return to the dorm. When he pushed the door open and saw the clean, neat room, he almost wanted to cry. Oh heavens, I really wish the school would come for a surprise inspection now; our dorm might actually win an award for once.

Wei Yan paced around the dorm, eventually exclaiming: “Clean. Too clean.”

Just then, Chen Qingtang walked in after hanging laundry on the balcony. Wei Yan rushed up to him, enthusiastic and open: “Hi, I am Wei Yan! Sorry, I went to get textbooks for the class this afternoon, or I definitely would have helped with the deep cleaning.”

Chen Qingtang smiled professionally: “Hello.”

Wei Yan reached out to pat his shoulder naturally, but Chen Qingtang leaned away to avoid it. Wei Yan was stunned, but not embarrassed. He scratched his head and laughed: “Well, it is my turn to clean next week, and Luo Xin the week after. We rotate.”

Chen Qingtang keenly noticed something: “Did you guys clean once a week before?”

Wei Yan suddenly began to avoid his gaze: “Uh, let us not talk about that. You are waiting for Shen Ge, right? He will be here soon.”

Chen Qingtang: “…”

Okay, I get it now.

Wei Yan pulled out a chair and sat down: “There are four of us. The other one is called Luo Xin, but he lives far away, so he is still on the train. You will meet him tomorrow.”

“Oh, by the way, do you have any taboos? Just say them so we can respect each other and keep the dorm atmosphere harmonious.”

Chen Qingtang tilted his head slightly: “Taboos?”

Wei Yan smiled: “Yeah, like I do not like people bothering me when I am gaming, and Xinzi does not like people moving his things.”

This way of setting boundaries from the start was something Shen He had proposed. It could effectively avoid unnecessary friction and conflict, making the relationship between roommates more relaxed, while also screening out insincere or troublesome people.

Wei Yan: “As for Shen Ge…”

Chen Qingtang quietly waited for him to continue. Although he knew Shen He better than Wei Yan did, he was curious about what Shen He was like in the eyes of others.

Wei Yan laughed: “Shen Ge might seem cold and hard to get along with, but he is actually a kind person. You will know once you get to know him.”

Chen Qingtang: “Is that so?”

Wei Yan: “Yeah, and one more thing: Shen Ge is anti-gay. He cannot really accept male homosexuality.”

Chen Qingtang nodded ambiguously.

Anti-gay my ass.

Who was it that slept with me for four years in our past life?

Wei Yan rubbed his head and laughed: “You are not one, right?”

“Gay” was still pretty rare; the probability of them running into one in their dorm could not be that high.

Chen Qingtang did not respond, just watched him peacefully with a smile, blinking once in the silence.

I really want to admit it maliciously and see his broken and helpless expression.

At that moment, the door creaked open.

Shen He had returned.