Falling After Marriage - Chapter 36

Chapter 36: I Have a Disease Where I’m Only Addicted to You

The road outside the alley was not as busy as it was in the morning. A few of the streetlights, lined up one after another, had faulty connections, hissing with electric current and flickering with an eerie light.

Occasional stray vehicles sped past, creating a momentary clamor before quickly returning to silence.

Lin Jin stood with one hand tucked into her trousers. The car headlights illuminated the oscillating shadow of her high heels, casting a cold, faint glow.

Her unhurried steps carried a powerful sense of coercion. Even without speaking, she could overlay the relaxed atmosphere with intense gloom.

“Is President Shu suggesting I interrupted a warm farewell?” Lin Jin acknowledged Shu Guan’s teasing. Her tone was flat, yet it contained a discernible anger, like gasoline spilled on the ground—a slight ignition could trigger an immediate danger.

As she countered the question with one of her own, she maintained a posture of looking intently at Cheng Sangluo. The question sounded more like it was directed at the puppy.

Cheng Sangluo met her dark, lightless eyes. She wanted to speak but felt her throat tighten. The explanation was stuck in her throat, uncomfortable to spit out or swallow.

Shu Guan turned halfway, her eyes blazing as she gazed at Cheng Sangluo, and quickly seized the conversation: “Miss Cheng, fishing with you and having dinner together made today exceptionally interesting. Thank you for being my driver. I hope the next time we meet, we can still be so fortunate.”

This seemingly kind woman adopted Lin Jin’s method of ignoring her, and her farewell was quite clever, having a double meaning.

To Cheng Sangluo, it was a farewell and a hopeful expectation for a future meeting. To Lin Jin, it was blatant provocation.

Every word was intentionally filtered, clearly outlining everything that happened today, even the setting.

After speaking, Shu Guan opened the car door and slid into the driver’s seat.

While starting the engine, she leaned out slightly and smiled sweetly at Cheng Sangluo, reminding her again: “Remember to apply sunscreen before going out tomorrow. It would pain me if you got sunburned.”

This remark carried a hint of flirtation, causing Cheng Sangluo’s heart to skip a beat.

She glanced at Lin Jin’s placid face, finding the lack of visible emotion the most unnerving thing.

But the farewell needed to conclude. Cheng Sangluo could only nod awkwardly: “Miss Shu, please drive safely at night.”

“Farewell. I wish you sweet dreams tonight.” Shu Guan maintained a proper smile, and after leaving a gentle blessing, she drove away.

She didn’t take the opportunity to savor Lin Jin’s discomfort, instead folding that silent rage into her imagination, which made it far more interesting.

Cheng Sangluo watched the car disappear around the corner, then had to confront the confrontation Shu Guan had orchestrated.

She looked at the silent Lin Jin, only having one thought: to leave quickly. But the spirit of kindness whispered in her ear, urging her to offer gentle comfort.

Lin Jin slowly calmed her numb mind. Her gaze seemed glued to the puppy’s face, taking in all her complicated expressions.

In her first glance, she showed no blame, instead trying to fill the void of the past half-day of yearning. In the second glance, after blinking, a resentment of questioning gradually swirled up.

But she still didn’t speak, not even a simple “Why.” She hoped Cheng Sangluo would take the initiative to say something, even if it was a perfunctory excuse, even if it was a lie.

In truth, Cheng Sangluo was not a perfunctory person, nor prone to lying.

She kept a two-step distance from Lin Jin, intending to demonstrate detachment. “Why are you here?”

Lin Jin’s eyes flickered with fragmented light, and her tightly pursed lips turned down slightly. “Why were you with her?”

“Did you instruct someone to beat up those young ‘ghost fire’ riders?”

“Did you have fun on your date with her today?”

“You know how much I liked that job. Why did you force me into a corner?”

“So, are you developing feelings for her?”

This conversation of non-sequiturs grew increasingly volatile as more questions were asked.

The person who became emotionally agitated was Cheng Sangluo, who was usually best at self-control. Lin Jin, who was prone to losing control, surprisingly appeared calm as still water.

They asked each other the answers they most wanted to know, yet they were so stingy, refusing to give a reply.

Cheng Sangluo put her hands on her hips. After a heavy sigh, she turned and walked into the alley.

Her attitude was determined, leaving Lin Jin alone on the nighttime road.

Lin Jin felt she had lost her true self at that moment. She didn’t know if it was fatigue or a thoroughly cooled heart. She slumped her shoulders in dejection. When she lowered her head, a strand of messy long hair fell, adding to her disheveled appearance.

She didn’t look at Cheng Sangluo’s retreating back but stood stubbornly in place, just as she stubbornly guarded the memories where that person had forgotten her.

She should pull the leaving person back. She should aggressively interrogate her. She should explode.

This is who you are, Lin Jin.

The demon clinging to the depths of Lin Jin’s soul clamored, driving her to take two steps towards the alley, but she quickly stopped, conflicted.

What then? After catching up with Cheng Sangluo, what?

Will she listen to her incessant curses, or offer warmth only to be met with cold indifference, or perhaps be treated violently?

No, she cannot have that woman’s scent on her. Not a trace is allowed to remain. If you don’t pull her back, how will you know the outcome?

The encouraging clamor tore at Lin Jin’s reason. Every word was like a temptation from the abyss, trying to pull her from the edge of sobriety.

Cheng Sangluo is yours. She can only be yours. Always yours. Hurry and hide her! Hide her in your safe, hide her in your closet. You can even lock her in that secret room.

Go quickly! Strip away her dignity, tear apart her stubbornness, bend her proud backbone, and play with her like a real dog. Don’t you love seeing her wag her tail and beg?

Go on, hurry!

Lin Jin painfully covered her forehead, unable to push back the terrifying demon.

She didn’t know which sentence touched her heart, unleashing her runaway emotions like a flood. This caused her shoulders to continually twitch, letting out a chilling, grating laugh.

When she proudly raised her chin again, she pathologically twitched her stiff neck, reaching up to gather her scattered hair. She transformed back into her overbearing self, the corners of her eyes tinged with a wild, reddish glow.

In the pitch-black alley, Cheng Sangluo was not walking fast.

She was thinking and hesitating, worried about leaving Lin Jin alone on the road and questioning why she was still feeling soft towards the madwoman.

Until the high heels clicked on the stone pavement of the small alley, the rhythm growing faster.

Cheng Sangluo stopped. The moment she turned around, Lin Jin’s hands were tightly gripping her collar, forcing her against the wall.

The first thing Lin Jin did was snatch the sunscreen from Cheng Sangluo’s hand and viciously smash it on the ground. “You take other people’s leftovers?”

In the darkness, she concealed a pair of moist, red eyes, staring intensely at Cheng Sangluo. Her high heel ground the long, thin tube over and over, as if she wished she were crushing Shu Guan’s face.

Cheng Sangluo was stunned but didn’t answer the humiliating question.

The cramped, damp alley only had faint, patchy light filtering from the exit, so the entwining in the chaos was unseen.

Cheng Sangluo couldn’t clearly see Lin Jin’s expression, but she could distinctly sense her terrible mood.

Receiving no response, Lin Jin grew more frantic. “You cannot, you cannot be so intimate with another woman! I won’t allow it!”

As she spoke, she pressed her hands onto Cheng Sangluo’s broad shoulders, slightly standing on her toes. The kiss she delivered to her neck instantly turned into a bite. “Why can’t you treat me kindly like you treat others? Why, why… why…”

It was a full-force bite, the tips of her teeth sinking into the flesh, determined to draw blood—it was resentment, it was utter desolation.

Cheng Sangluo hissed in pain, instinctively squeezing Lin Jin’s jaw with the web of her hand, intending to push her away.

But every time this happened, she repeatedly told herself internally: Don’t hurt her. Don’t hurt her. Don’t hurt her like last time.

So, she silently permitted it, allowing the madwoman to frenziedly bite her, which ultimately became the cold indifference Lin Jin despised.

Lin Jin was having an episode; all her actions were out of control.

She bit forcefully, her tongue tasting Cheng Sangluo’s metallic sweetness. She kissed forcefully, leaving mottled red marks on her neck.

It was that sweet, metallic taste that pulled a sliver of rationality back into her unbridled emotions.

She clung to Cheng Sangluo’s neck, trembling all over.

After finding a moment of calm amid her burning breaths, she called out urgently: “Cheng Sangluo… take me home… quickly…”

Cheng Sangluo had been absent-minded. She refused to admit she craved this intimacy, and she refused to admit she was developing any different feelings for Lin Jin.

But she was also perfectly lucid, lucid enough that with just a little force, she could push away the frail Lin Jin.

Yet, she didn’t.

She endured the itching and pain creeping from her neck, even subconsciously wrapping one arm tightly around the slender waist she could span with her hands.

It wasn’t until Lin Jin’s low murmur, filled with plea, that she finally escaped the trance of nearly losing herself.

Cheng Sangluo finally recalled the Lin Jin who was out of control, violent, and unfamiliar on the yacht.

This time, she didn’t ask for reasons, nor did she flee. Instead, she chose to take Lin Jin away without a moment’s hesitation.

She grabbed Lin Jin’s arm, slightly bent her knees, and, with a lift of her shoulder, hoisted the light, beautiful woman onto her shoulder.

Her steps were rushed but she tried extremely hard to maintain stable balance.

To ease Lin Jin’s emotional state, she spoke between gasps about a certain unknown past: “Do you know why I constantly carry you? It was the summer of my first year in the military. Zhouhai suffered a once-in-a-century heavy rain. It rained incessantly for a week, followed by a typhoon. Inland flooding mixed with seawater backflow. I was deployed for disaster relief. Those flood-control sandbags never stopped needing to be carried… Lin Jin, you are so light, lighter than those sandbags…”

Lin Jin slumped against her back, silently listening to the out-of-place story.

As if a memory was triggered, the fingertips kneading the back of Cheng Sangluo’s shirt gradually tightened until her pads turned bloodless.

Cheng Sangluo felt a bit ridiculous talking to herself and stopped reminiscing. Instead, she pleaded softly: “Will you promise me something? I’ll drive you home, and you tell me what’s wrong with you. That’s a fair trade.”

How could a woman’s back be so broad?

This was the strange question that abruptly popped into Lin Jin’s mind when she was semi-conscious, and it wasn’t the first time.

She had been surprised last night when Cheng Sangluo enveloped her in her arms.

Her arms clung to that back, needing to be embraced to the extreme to hold tightly. Although the touch of the old scars was uneven, it provided an extraordinary sense of security, a reassuring tension.

Of course, Lin Jin had this question because Cheng Sangluo had carried her all the way, except while driving, and hadn’t even put her down inside the Linxi Terrace elevator.

Not until she rushed through the door of the large apartment and gently placed Lin Jin on the sofa did Cheng Sangluo collapse onto the carpet, taking deep breaths continuously. “I can’t… I can’t… I trained daily in prison… my intensity isn’t what it used to be… my body isn’t what it used to be…”

Lin Jin lay supine on the sofa for only a moment.

She struggled to sit up, taking out several different medicine bottles from the coffee table drawer.

Her hands shook violently as she took the medicine, causing several pills to drop onto the floor. Without stopping to pick them up or waiting for water, she hastily swallowed a handful.

This set of actions was seamless, catching Cheng Sangluo’s eye and prompting brief surprise: “A handful of medicine? Don’t you need water?”

Lin Jin’s face was pale, and her mouth tasted intensely bitter. She shook her head and ordered: “Go get me a bottle of alcohol.”

“Are you crazy? Who washes down medicine with alcohol?!”

“Alcohol!” Lin Jin braced herself against the sofa, a thin layer of sweat covering her forehead. “Forget it… I’ll get it myself…”

She struggled to stand up but was instantly pushed back onto the sofa by Cheng Sangluo. “No. You’ll kill yourself.”

Lin Jin weakly scrutinized her expression and sneered: “Wouldn’t you be happy if I died?”

“If you died, the police would look for me first.” Cheng Sangluo left that remark and rushed to the kitchen for bottled water, running back before Lin Jin could move for the alcohol.

She twisted the cap off and handed the bottle to the madwoman, urging: “Drink the water, quickly, quickly.”

Lin Jin snatched the mineral water grumpily and drank too quickly, nearly choking.

Cheng Sangluo handed her a few tissues, asking again: “So, you’re sick. Can you tell me what kind of sickness it is?”

Lin Jin’s emotions were slightly relieved, and the familiar, often-seen fake smile finally curled on her lips.

She tilted her head to examine the puppy, who was waiting for an answer. She leaned closer, coaxing: “Yes, I’m sick. I have a disease where I’m only addicted to you, so…”

As she spoke, she moved off the sofa and slowly kneeled behind Cheng Sangluo, her soft lower abdomen rubbing subtly against the broad, solid back.

Only when she gently rested her chin on Cheng Sangluo’s neck did she continue in a whisper: “So… I always want to be near you, always want to tease you, and always want to possess you… Let’s make love. Like last night, like this morning. I just want to be endless with you…”

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