Empress, Can I? [Transmigration + GL] - Chapter 53

Time flew by swiftly.

Before long, it was already March—the season when warblers soared over lush grass, and willow catkins drifted across the entire city.

One day, after dismissing court, Xuan Jingchi watched as a fish suddenly leaped out of the lake, its silver scales glinting before plunging back into the water with a splash, leaving no trace behind except ripples spreading across the surface.

A report came in that the trusted subordinate of Lin Zaifu, the governor of Bingzhou, had engaged in corruption and abuse of power, driving several people to their deaths.

An investigation was absolutely necessary!

But she needed irrefutable evidence to leave Lin Zaifu with no room for excuses, to justify the charges. The question was whether the Censorate officials could uncover it.

As Xuan Jingchi strolled along, lost in thought, the chief eunuch Liu Jili approached with an ingratiating smile. “Your Majesty, the sun is quite strong today. Be careful not to overheat. This servant will escort Your Majesty to the Qionghua Pavilion for a rest.”

The Qionghua Pavilion wasn’t far from the Imperial Garden, but getting there required a detour. Not wanting to trouble herself, Xuan Jingchi said, “I’ll just rest at the Phoenix Palace instead.”

Liu Jili froze for a moment before quickly stepping closer, staying right by Xuan Jingchi’s side. “Your Majesty, the Empress is no longer at the Phoenix Palace. What’s the point of going there? Besides, with the master absent, this servant worries the attendants might have grown lazy and neglected upkeep. If Your Majesty insists, this servant will send someone to announce your arrival and have them clean up first.”

Hearing how troublesome it would be, Xuan Jingchi immediately halted. Liu Jili’s eyes brightened, and he eagerly added, “Your Majesty, the Qionghua Pavilion would be much better. The path there is lined with willow trees. Didn’t Your Majesty once speak of ‘listening to orioles among willow waves’? Walking under the shade, you won’t feel the sun, nor will the detour seem long.”

To his surprise, Xuan Jingchi replied, “I won’t rest after all. I’m returning to the Hall of Mental Cultivation.”

Liu Jili: “Ah!”

Xuan Jingchi glanced at Liu Jili, noting the forced smile on his face and the hesitation in his eyes. “Liu Jili, you’re so insistent on taking me to the Qionghua Pavilion. Is there something special there?”

“No, no, how would this servant dare to play any tricks? Even if I had such thoughts, with Your Majesty’s brilliant discernment, you’d surely see through it at a glance…”

“Liu Jili, if you keep spouting flattery, believe me, I’ll reward you with twenty strokes of the rod right now—so you can have a nice, quiet rest!”

Liu Jili hurriedly covered his mouth in fright.

Xuan Jingchi turned to look at him. “Speak. What exactly is in the Qionghua Pavilion?”

“This… there’s nothing, really nothing. It’s just that seeing Your Majesty sweating from the sun, I thought to invite you to rest…”

Xuan Jingchi glanced at him, then turned to Chenxiang. “Take some people to the Qionghua Pavilion and see what treasures Liu Jili is so reluctant to reveal.”

Chenxiang acknowledged the order and was about to leave with two maids when Liu Jili panicked and stepped forward to block her path, calling out, “Wait, Miss Chenxiang!”

Xuan Jingchi stared at him. “Still not talking?”

Left with no choice, he leaned in close to Xuan Jingchi’s ear. “Your Majesty, Minister Li noticed that Your Majesty’s harem only has the Empress… heh heh… you understand. He presented two beauties as tribute.” He deliberately lowered his voice. “Both as lovely as flowers. Rest assured, Your Majesty, this servant will keep it absolutely secret. The Empress won’t find out.”

“Which Minister Li?”

Liu Jili replied, “This servant wouldn’t dare deceive Your Majesty. Minister Li was originally under Prime Minister Lin, but he is utterly loyal to Your Majesty. He specially begged this servant to present these two beauties to you.”

Hearing that the man was under Lin Zaifu, Xuan Jingchi was somewhat surprised. Her eyebrows arched slightly, and she let out a cold laugh. “Liu Jili, I’ve treated you well, yet you scheme to harm me.”

Liu Jili looked utterly terrified. “Your Majesty, how would this servant dare harm you? Even with ten thousand guts, I wouldn’t dare harm Your Majesty. You are the sovereign of the highest honor—since ancient times, which emperor hasn’t had three palaces and six courtyards filled with consorts and beauties? Even if you took a few more, who could say anything? This servant only fears Your Majesty might suffer in solitude.”

Xuan Jingchi studied him, puzzled as to why a eunuch was so fixated on matters of romance. After a moment’s thought, she said, “Bring those two women to see me.”

Overjoyed, Liu Jili hurried off to summon them himself.

Upon meeting them, they were indeed two beauties—adorned with tinkling jewelry, their hair styled in elegant palace coiffures, their faces as radiant as flowers and the moon. Both were in the bloom of youth, around sixteen or seventeen.

Xuan Jingchi had initially intended to send them back immediately. But then it occurred to her: Minister Li, as Lin Zaifu’s subordinate, had gone out of his way to present these beauties, undoubtedly to curry favor. If she rejected them outright, wouldn’t that be a direct slap in the face? Wouldn’t it sever any possibility of division within Lin Zaifu’s faction?

She sighed and asked, “What are your plans? If you wish to return home, I’ll release you now and grant you gold and silver.”

To her surprise, both women expressed reluctance to leave.

As it turned out, one was an orphan from a poor family. After her parents died, she was sold by relatives. Minister Li, struck by her exceptional beauty, had purchased her. The other was the descendant of a disgraced official, exiled with her family executed, leaving her no home to return to. Her striking looks had caught Minister Li’s eye, leading him to free her from servitude and offer her to the emperor.

Even knowing the emperor they were to serve was a woman, for both of them, it was far better than enduring abuse or exile.

Liu Jili said considerately, “Your Majesty, this servant has thoroughly investigated the backgrounds of these two individuals. Rest assured, they harbor no disloyalty towards Your Majesty.”

After pondering for a long while, Xuan Jingchi allowed them to continue residing at Qionghua Pavilion, granting them freedom to move about the palace except in areas of military and political importance. However, she made no mention whatsoever of taking them into the imperial harem.

Unable to discern the emperor’s thoughts, Liu Jili kept stealing glances at her with his small eyes, hesitating to speak. When Xuan Jingchi shot him a cold look, he immediately became subdued and lowered his head sheepishly.

Xuan Jingchi returned directly to the Hall of Mental Cultivation. As she reviewed memorials, she glanced at Meng Wan, who sat upright below.

Noticing her meticulous demeanor, straight posture, and elegant beauty, the emperor remarked, “Wan’er is seventeen this year, isn’t she?”

At that age in ancient times, she was absolutely of marriageable age.

Xuan Jingchi wondered whether Meng Wan preferred men or women. If she liked women, perhaps those two beauties could be bestowed upon her.

Then again, she didn’t know if those two beauties preferred men or women either. If they didn’t like women, giving them to Meng Wan would be rather cruel.

Caught off guard by the emperor’s question, Meng Wan paused her writing brush and replied, “Your Majesty remembers correctly. This subject is indeed seventeen.”

Xuan Jingchi continued, “Does Wan’er have someone special in mind?”

Meng Wan hadn’t expected such a direct question from the emperor. Her face flushed red. Just as she was about to answer negatively, a thought suddenly occurred to her—was Her Majesty considering arranging a marriage for her?

The idea of an arranged marriage made Meng Wan feel unexpectedly reluctant. She hadn’t yet contemplated married life with its domestic responsibilities. Quickly she said, “This subject is wholly devoted to assisting Your Majesty and thinks of nothing else.”

Seeing her usually composed and steady right-hand woman display rare signs of fluster, Xuan Jingchi smiled at her response.

“What are you afraid of? I wouldn’t force you to marry anyone. Wan’er, assisting me doesn’t conflict with having someone you love. You’re still a bit young—your words tend to be too absolute. Very well, when you find someone you wish to spend your life with, tell me, and I’ll arrange the marriage for you.”

Someone to spend her life with?

The clarity in Meng Wan’s eyes gradually gave way to confusion.

Who would that be?

Other than her mother, who could she possibly long for?

Suddenly struck by a thought, she was startled. A drop of ink fell from the tip of the brush she was holding, landing on the pristine white paper and slowly spreading.

Meng Wan felt dazed. Before her eyes appeared the corner of a white garment. Gradually, like the spreading ink, this image grew larger until a graceful figure in white danced before her.

She guiltily stole a glance at Her Majesty, who was absorbed in reviewing memorials and hadn’t noticed her lapse in composure. Secretly sighing in relief, she steadied herself and refocused on handling the documents.

There weren’t too many memorials today. Xuan Jingchi concentrated hard and managed to finish reviewing them all before the end of the workday.

After being Emperor for so long, it was rare to leave on time even once.

Xiao Yueli hadn’t expected her to return so early. Noticing the smile on her face, she went forward to greet her, “Your Majesty seems in good spirits today.”

Xuan Jingchi nodded—who wouldn’t be happy to leave work on time?

Beaming, she replied, “Naturally!” Without calling for Nuanxiang or Chenxiang, she changed out of the heavy ceremonial robes herself into lighter casual attire. Then, as usual, she moved to kiss Xiao Yueli’s cheek.

Unexpectedly, the Empress pushed her away firmly this time. “Dinner!”

“Alright, alright, let’s eat.” Completely oblivious to the coldness in the Empress’s eyes, Xuan Jingchi cheerfully walked to the dining table. Watching Nuanxiang and Xiao Rong set out the dishes, she asked, “What delicacies do we have today?”

Xiao Fu answered with a grin, “Her Majesty specially instructed the kitchen to prepare Chinese toon shoots today, along with the shepherd’s purse meatballs Your Majesty loves.”

“Really? Then I must savor them properly!” Xuan Jingchi grew even more delighted.

Dinner was soon served. Xiao Yueli personally picked up a shepherd’s purse meatball for Xuan Jingchi.

Xuan Jingchi took a bite, and instantly her enchanting face twisted in discomfort. “This shepherd’s purse tastes off.”

The Empress asked calmly, “How so?”

“It’s a bit sour—too much vinegar.” Xuan Jingchi wanted to spit it out, but meeting the Empress’s smiling gaze, she forced herself to swallow the meatball.

“Then Your Majesty should try this.” Xiao Yueli scooped a spoonful of Chinese toon shoots and brought it to her lips—clearly intending to feed her.

The usually reserved Xiao Yueli was actually feeding her! Xuan Jingchi was overjoyed. Amidst the muffled giggles of the palace maids, she ate the offering from the Empress’s hand.

But after just one chew, her smile vanished, replaced by sheer agony. If she hadn’t known this was Chinese toon, she would have sworn she was eating poison—so foul and bitter that even feces might taste better.

“Your Majesty, is it not to your liking? I specifically asked the kitchen to make this.” The Empress blinked her innocent large eyes, staring unwaveringly.

Xuan Jingchi gulped down the “poison,” forcing a smile through gritted teeth. “G-good. Delicious. I like it very much.”

“As long as Your Majesty is pleased.” Xiao Yueli moved to serve her more toon shoots.

Horrified, Xuan Jingchi quickly stopped her. “No! Don’t give me any more!”

The Empress blinked again. “Didn’t Your Majesty say you liked it?”

“Well… even if I like it, I shouldn’t focus on just one dish. There are so many others to try.”

With that, Xuan Jingchi picked up her chopsticks, aiming for a piece of rose-scented oil chicken.

“Your Majesty, you’ve been overworking lately with late nights, causing excessive internal heat. You should eat more heat-clearing dishes.”

Xiao Yueli intercepted, placing a piece of bitter gourd stuffed with meat on her plate instead.

Xuan Jingchi gazed at the Empress with deep affection, thinking to herself, Yueli really cares about me. Just a few sleepless nights, and she’s already making sure I eat well. If I could have her concern like this, I wouldn’t mind staying up late every day.

Nuanxiang, Chenxiang, and Xiao Fu lowered their heads, their lips curling as if stifling laughter, while Xiao Rong alone kept her head bowed so deeply that her expression couldn’t be seen.

Xuan Jingchi happily popped the stuffed bitter melon into her mouth, only for her brows to instantly furrow.

Damn! Is this even edible?! Bile isn’t this bitter!!

“Your Majesty, you should eat more of this dish. It’s good for you,” Xiao Yueli said, seemingly oblivious to her contorted expression, as she continued to serve her more bitter melon.

Only then did Xuan Jingchi notice that her Empress’s smile was unusual—her lips were curved, but her eyes held no warmth.

She finally realized: The Empress is deliberately messing with me!

But why would she do that?

Xuan Jingchi racked her brain but couldn’t figure it out.

Could it be because I asked Meng Wan today if she had someone she liked?

Does the Empress think I was hinting, actually trying to ask if Meng Wan has feelings for me?

No, I’ve already told the Empress I have no such intentions toward Meng Wan—it’s purely a professional, superior-subordinate relationship.

If not that, then what could have upset Xiao Yueli?

She glanced down at the “culinary bombs” in her bowl, forced a smile, and said, “We are full. The Empress may take your time.”

With that, her gaze swept over Nuanxiang, Chenxiang, Xiao Fu, and Xiao Rong before settling on the latter. “Xiao Rong, bring the shuttlecock and accompany us outside for some exercise.”

Xiao Rong complied, stealing a glance at Her Majesty to see if she would object. When no protest came, she picked up the shuttlecock and followed the Emperor out.

After they left, Xiao Yueli also stopped eating, ordering the meal to be cleared and requesting the kitchen to send a box of pine nut and lily pastries in the evening.

Though it was said that Xiao Rong was accompanying the Emperor to kick the shuttlecock, in reality, it was Xiao Rong doing all the kicking—now panting heavily and out of breath.

And the Emperor still wouldn’t let her stop.

“Xiao Rong, if you won’t tell us why the Empress is angry, then at least tell Us where she went today and who she met. Surely that’s fine?”

“Re—reply, Your Majesty… This servant isn’t… hiding anything… It’s just… I don’t know… why Her Majesty is… angry… Today, Her Majesty…”

“Alright, you can stop now. Speak slowly and clearly. Don’t leave out any details.”

Xiao Rong finally caught her breath, gasping several times before continuing, “Your Majesty, Her Majesty followed her usual routine today—after breakfast, she took a walk in the Imperial Garden along the lakeside. I accompanied her the whole time, and nothing unusual happened. But on our way back, we saw two women following a young eunuch under Liu Jili’s charge into the Qionghua Pavilion. Afterward, that eunuch came out and kept peering around, looking left and right.”

“At the time, the Empress also asked this servant, ‘Who are these two girls?'”

“This servant even laughed then, as the two looked unfamiliar—’Don’t know them, no idea why Liu Jili’s little eunuchs are hiding two beauties. Could they be new embroideresses to be assigned to the Imperial Costume Bureau?'”

“Her Majesty then stopped going forward and turned back immediately.”

By this point, Xuan Jingchi understood everything. It was all because of those two beauties!

She cursed Liu Jili in her heart before turning back toward Chenyuan Palace.

“Where is the Empress?”

Nuanxiang replied, “Your Majesty, the Empress is reading in the side hall.”

“Understood.” Xuan Jingchi deliberately walked to the side hall’s entrance and announced loudly, “Someone! Relay Our decree: Chief Eunuch Liu Jili is to forfeit a year’s salary.”

“Aye!” A young eunuch immediately scurried off to deliver the decree, trembling with fear. He walked cautiously, wondering to himself where the Emperor’s favored Liu Jili had gone wrong to incur such displeasure.

Truly, the Emperor’s mind is unfathomable—fortune and misfortune are unpredictable.

Xuan Jingchi said, “All of you, leave.” With that, she pushed open the side hall’s door and entered.

Xuan Jingchi noticed that Xiao Yueli was ignoring her, her gaze fixed on her book without even glancing her way.

“Yueli, don’t be angry.” Xuan Jingchi approached, her face all smiles, and reached out to embrace Xiao Yueli’s shoulders.

Xiao Yueli lifted her eyes and gave her a cool glance.

Xuan Jingchi’s smile instantly froze, her outstretched hand hanging awkwardly in midair before she sheepishly withdrew it.

“What does Your Majesty mean by such words? This consort is not angry—on the contrary, I am very happy, happy for Your Majesty!”

Xuan Jingchi was no fool. Hearing this, she knew the Empress was not just displeased but furious.

She took another step closer, bending down to explain, “Those two beauties were sent by someone else—I didn’t accept them! I never had any such intention. You heard me—I’ve already punished Liu Jili.”

“How strange, then. If you had no such intention, why would Liu Jili seek them out for you?”

“It wasn’t Liu Jili who sought them—they were sent by another official. I absolutely never ordered Liu Jili to gather any beauties, nor any handsome men either!”

Xiao Yueli scoffed but still refused to look at her. “If you didn’t want them, why did you summon them? And after meeting them, why keep them in the palace? Or is it that you couldn’t openly accept them but privately couldn’t bear to let them go?”

“No, no! I absolutely never thought that way! I intended to release them, but they both had pitiable backgrounds, tragic circumstances, and nowhere to go—that’s why I took them into the palace.”

Xiao Yueli gave a cold laugh. “Is that truly the case?”

Xuan Jingchi sighed and straightened up. “Empress, they are also subjects of Daqing. As their sovereign, how could I not help them in their time of need? Whether they were women, men, elders, or children—had I encountered them today, I would have helped them all. If even I refuse to save them, who else can the people of Daqing rely on?”

As she spoke, she watched Xiao Yueli, who still refused to meet her gaze. Knowing the resentment in her heart remained, Xuan Jingchi lowered her head and said, “Yueli, whether you believe me or not, I truly have no interest in them. I don’t need so many beauties—I only want you.”

This time, she waited for a long while, but Xiao Yueli never spoke a word.

The unusual silence made Xuan Jingchi feel uneasy.

Seeing that she remained silent, Xuan Jingchi also stopped speaking. She turned around, preparing to leave the hall.

However, the moment she moved, someone called out to her, “Your Majesty.”

Xuan Jingchi was overjoyed and turned back, saying, “Yueli, you believe me now, don’t you?”

Xiao Yueli set down her book and looked at her steadily, her tone calm. “Your Majesty, you are the supreme ruler. It is only natural for the imperial harem to house three thousand beauties.”

Xuan Jingchi froze. “Yueli, what are you saying? I don’t want anyone else. Having you alone is enough for me.”

“Your Majesty, if you truly desire beauties in the harem,” Xiao Yueli’s voice was eerily composed, “as the Empress, I will not stand in your way.”

Xuan Jingchi stared at her serene, unruffled expression and suddenly grew agitated. “Is that really what you think?”

“Do you feel I haven’t treated you well enough? Or do you not believe in my sincerity? Why would you even think that I would want more women?”

“Could it be that, in your eyes, I’m such a promiscuous person?!!”

Her voice grew louder, her tone more urgent, until finally, with reddened eyes, she spoke word by word: “Xiao Yueli, you have insulted me!”

With that, she strode to the door without looking back and flung it open with a loud bang, shaking dust loose from the beams.

Nuanxiang, Chenxiang, Xiao Fu, and Xiao Rong, startled by the commotion, were utterly shocked.

The Emperor had always been even-tempered, especially gentle and soft-spoken with the Empress. Never had they seen her raise her voice at the Empress, let alone lose her temper.

In their memory, this was the first time the Emperor had ever been enraged—and it was a quarrel with the Empress!

Fuming, Xuan Jingchi stormed toward the bedchamber but suddenly realized that after this falling-out with the Empress, they certainly wouldn’t be speaking tonight.

If she went to the bedchamber, where would the Empress sleep?

Thus, a crowd of palace attendants watched as the Emperor abruptly halted at the bedchamber door, turned around, and strode out of Chenyuan Palace, heading toward the Hall of Mental Cultivation instead.

Seeing this, Chenxiang hurried after her.

Upon arriving at the Hall of Mental Cultivation, Xuan Jingchi dismissed all her attendants, including Chenxiang.

Xiao Yueli, do you truly wish for me to have other women?!!

Could you watch me be intimate with others and remain indifferent?

Do you even love me at all?

The more she thought about it, the angrier she became, as if an unnamed fire raged fiercely in her chest.

This was the fury of having the pure love she offered tainted by the one she cherished most.

Her gaze swept around the room before landing on the inkstone on the desk. In a fit of anger, she grabbed it and smashed it heavily onto the ground.

With a crisp, loud crash, the attendants standing outside the hall trembled in fright, their hearts pounding with fear.

They didn’t know why the Emperor’s imperial countenance was so wrathful today.

Xuan Jingchi slumped weakly into her chair as the fury in her heart subsided, replaced by an overwhelming wave of sorrow.

She sat rigidly on the grand, solemn chair that symbolized royal majesty, tears streaming down her face before she even realized it.

Her chest felt suffocatingly tight, and silent tears fell like broken strings of pearls, growing heavier by the moment.

Night had long since fallen unnoticed, and she had no idea how much time had passed when footsteps echoed through the dark, gloomy hall.

Then, candles were lit.

“No, don’t light the lamps.”

Xuan Jingchi’s voice was hoarse, filled with exhaustion, weariness, and heartbreak.

Yet, the lamp remained lit, and the footsteps approached again.

Faced with the attendants’ blatant defiance of her order, Xuan Jingchi couldn’t bring herself to care.

Her vacant stare fixed on a corner of the window above the hall doors—there was nothing there. She was simply staring blankly, as if searching for a place to rest her aimless gaze.

A figure hurried to her side, kneeling on the floor and kowtowing deeply.

“This humble consort deserves death for causing Your Majesty such grief!”

It was the Empress!

Hearing the voice, Xuan Jingchi snapped out of her daze and turned her gaze to the figure kneeling before her.

It was truly Empress Xiao Yueli.

Xuan Jingchi should have been overjoyed—the Empress had come to her. She still cared, didn’t she?

But why did she feel no happiness at all? All she could sense was the bitterness in her heart.

She had only come because Xuan Jingchi was the Emperor, the ruler of the nation.

The virtuous Empress understood that to ensure the Emperor’s well-being, she must not distress her, lest it harm her health.

The bitterness spread, saturating her heart as if soaked in acid. The tears she had barely managed to stop now flowed silently once more.

Sitting in the dim light, she took a deep breath, struggling to keep her voice steady. “Rise, Empress. I pardon you.”

Xiao Yueli remained kneeling, straightening slightly but keeping her head bowed.

“I will be fine, Empress. Do not worry. I merely wish to be alone. You may leave,” Xuan Jingchi said flatly.

After speaking, she closed her eyes slowly, as if utterly drained.

The Empress did care for her, love her, didn’t she?

Then what was she fighting against?

And why was she so heartbroken?

She didn’t know. She couldn’t articulate it, couldn’t answer.

All she felt was an unbearable pain, as if something called “magnanimity” had stabbed her deeply.

Neither spoke, and the vast hall was eerily silent.

Seeing that the Empress showed no intention of leaving, Xuan Jingchi slowly stood and walked toward the exit.

Her back straight, she took one step after another, moving toward the doors.

She was the Son of Heaven. She had her dignity and pride. She couldn’t beg the Empress not to be so generous as to offer her, who loved her deeply, to another.

Once she stepped through those doors, she would still love the Empress, still treat her well.

But the pain in her heart would forever stand between them, a wound that would never fade.

Seeing Xuan Jingchi about to leave without even turning her head, Xiao Yueli rushed back and tightly embraced her from behind.

Tears fell one by one from her beautiful eyes, silently soaking into Xuan Jingchi’s robes.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Jingchi, I didn’t mean to insult you! I don’t want you to have other women! But I’m the Empress, I should be a virtuous and magnanimous Empress! I can’t be like this! I can’t monopolize you like this.”

Her arms around Xuan Jingchi tightened even more as she pressed her head firmly against her back.

She remembered there had once been a fatal scar there—Xuan Jingchi had been struck by an arrow during the autumn hunt and nearly died.

At that moment, she felt her entire world had completely collapsed.

“I’m sorry! I’ll never say such hypocritically magnanimous words again!”

Xuan Jingchi turned around, her face now streaked with tears that glistened heartbreakingly in the candlelight.

Holding the equally tearful Xiao Yueli, she said in a trembling voice, “Xiao Yueli, I love you! With my whole heart! Please never say such hurtful words to me again.”

“I am an emperor, but first and foremost, I am a human being—flesh and blood. I feel pain too!”

By the time Xuan Jingchi and Xiao Yueli returned to Chenyuan Palace, it was already deep into the night as usual.

The palace servants, terrified by the emperor’s fury after dinner, had not dared to sleep.

Only after hearing Xuan Jingchi’s orders did they finally retire.

It should have been a relaxed and pleasant evening for Xuan Jingchi, who had left work on time, but now she looked utterly drained, overwhelmed by endless fatigue.

Her heart was tired after the pain.

Her body was tired after the tears.

After a quick bath, she lay down on the bed, turning her back to Xiao Yueli as she settled in to sleep.

She didn’t want to say anything now, didn’t want to think about anything—just close her eyes and sleep.

Perhaps after some rest, her spirits would lift, her mood would improve, and the hidden ache in her heart would fade away.

“Jingchi, please forgive me, won’t you?” Xiao Yueli embraced her from behind.

Xuan Jingchi replied, “I’ve already forgiven you.”

“No, you haven’t truly forgiven me…” Xiao Yueli choked out.

“Yueli, believe me, I truly want to forgive you,” Xuan Jingchi said expressionlessly, still not turning around.

It was very late before Xuan Jingchi finally drifted into a fitful sleep.

That night, she slept very still, maintaining the same side-lying position she had fallen asleep in without moving.

She wasn’t sure if she had truly slept, waking unusually early the next morning—earlier than even the Empress.

Sitting up, she looked at Xiao Yueli beside her.

Still deep in sleep, Xiao Yueli must have cried—her eyes were swollen and red, tear stains streaked her cheeks. Her sleep seemed restless, her brows still furrowed.

Xuan Jingchi’s heart ached inexplicably. She shouldn’t have treated Xiao Yueli this way, shouldn’t have neglected the woman she loved so deeply.

She reached out, wanting to smooth those knitted brows, but halfway there, that thorn in her heart suddenly stabbed sharply, making her shudder violently.

Slowly withdrawing her hand, she got out of bed, carefully tucking in the blankets around the sleeping figure before turning to dress.

She casually pinned up her long hair with a single hairpin and stepped outside.

Nuanxiang and Chenxiang, waiting outside the hall, were slightly surprised to see the Emperor—who usually slept in—appear so early. Chenxiang remarked, “Your Majesty is up unusually early.”

Xuan Jingchi forced a smile. “I’ll freshen up outside. Don’t disturb the Empress’s rest.”

The morning court session held nothing particularly noteworthy, except for the formal impeachment of the Bingzhou governor for corruption and abuse of power. Xuan Jingchi immediately tasked the Censorate with a thorough investigation.

“Investigate first. Whether the Censorate can uncover the truth or how deep they can dig—we’ll discuss that later.”

Perhaps because there had been fewer memorials yesterday, today’s stack was noticeably larger.

But her focus was clearly not as sharp as usual. After just an hour of reading, she felt dizzy, her head throbbing, and her eyes aching.

Meng Wan, noticing this, said worriedly, “Your Majesty, please take care of your health. These can wait until tomorrow.”

Xuan Jingchi smiled faintly. “Today’s matters should be settled today. Tomorrow will bring its own tasks.”

Seeing her determination, Meng Wan fell silent. When she had entered the Hall of Mental Cultivation earlier, she had seen the inkstone shattered into five pieces and ink splattered across the floor.

Clearly, it had been thrown down in a fit of rage.

This was the Hall of Mental Cultivation, where the nation’s highest military and political affairs were handled. The only person who could act so recklessly here—and whose mess the palace servants wouldn’t dare clean up without permission—was Emperor Xuan Jingchi herself.

She summoned the servants to wipe away the ink stains and clean up the debris.

By the time she finished reviewing the memorials, night had fallen again. As Xuan Jingchi returned, she saw the bedchamber brightly lit from afar. She knew Xiao Yueli was still awake, likely waiting for her.

At this thought, her heart ached again. The Empress stayed up night after night, never retiring until she returned.

She really shouldn’t have been so petty, shouldn’t have let that one remark from the Empress fester in her heart.

Unconsciously quickening her pace, she headed toward the bedchamber.

Just as she was about to enter, Xiao Rong stopped her. Seeing the maid’s hesitant expression and worried look, Xuan Jingchi asked, “What is it?”

Xiao Rong replied, “Your Majesty, Her Majesty cried several times today, murmuring things like ‘She’ll never forgive me…’ No matter how much I tried to console her, it was no use. She hasn’t eaten anything all day—no breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Her Majesty has always had a delicate constitution since childhood. If this continues, I fear she’ll fall ill.”

Shocked, Xuan Jingchi exclaimed, “The Empress hasn’t eaten all day?”

Xiao Rong nodded. “Not only has she not eaten, but she hasn’t even had a sip of water.”

Suddenly, Xiao Rong knelt and kowtowed. “Your Majesty, has Her Majesty somehow offended you? I beg you to forgive her. If punishment is needed, this servant is willing to bear it in her place.”

Xuan Jingchi helped her up and said, “You are very loyal to the Empress. Not only will I not punish you, but I will also reward you generously.”

With that, Xuan Jingchi turned to a eunuch and ordered, “Have the kitchen prepare a bowl of plain congee with a side of yam and jujube paste cakes. Be quick about it.”

“Yes, Your Majesty!” The eunuch, hearing the urgency, immediately hurried out of the courtyard and broke into a run as soon as he was outside.

Xiao Rong, upon hearing the Emperor’s arrangements, knew they were for the Empress and felt greatly relieved. She curtsied and said, “This servant thanks Your Majesty!”

Xuan Jingchi smiled, “You must have been worried all day. Go and rest now.”

With that, Xuan Jingchi quickly entered the bedchamber.

Xiao Yueli, seeing her return, wiped her tears and stepped forward, saying, “Your Majesty is back.”

Xuan Jingchi glanced at her and noticed the tear stains still on her cheeks, her weary expression, and her usually clear, watery eyes now bloodshot and filled with gloom.

She turned away, removing her outer robe, and asked, “It’s so late. Why hasn’t the Empress retired yet?”

Xiao Yueli didn’t answer but instead asked, “How did the affairs of state go today? Was everything handled smoothly?”

Xuan Jingchi nodded, “It was fine, just a lot of memorials. You know my handwriting is poor, so most of them were dictated by me and written by Meng Wan.”

Xiao Yueli bit her lip and said, “Minister Meng is always so capable, able to share Your Majesty’s burdens.”

As she spoke, her expression grew even more somber, and she lowered her head.

Meng Wan was learned, talented, steady, and efficient—she could truly lighten Jingchi’s load.

And herself? She only caused the Emperor unnecessary grief and sorrow.

Thinking of this, Xiao Yueli felt even more regretful and heartbroken.

Why had she said those words?

When she saw those two beauties in the Jade Flower Hall, she had been shocked, angry, disappointed, and uneasy.

She knew she couldn’t bear the thought of Xuan Jingchi having other women or men. She couldn’t imagine a day when Jingchi might fall in love with someone else.

Yet, she couldn’t face her own feelings. Deep down, she even believed that as the Emperor, Xuan Jingchi would inevitably have other women—just like any other emperor, with a steady stream of young, beautiful girls entering the palace every few years.

And then, amidst the company of so many beauties, Jingchi would gradually grow distant from her, eventually forgetting her altogether.

Because that was what her mother had told her, and her own father had three concubines.

If even her father was like that, how much more so for the ruler of a nation?

But when she heard Xuan Jingchi repeatedly assure her that she had no interest in those two beauties, the heavy stone pressing on her heart shifted slightly. She knew Jingchi was speaking the truth.

She wanted to say, “Xuan Jingchi, you can’t have other women. I can’t bear it.” But the words that came out were, “If you want beauties, I won’t stand in your way.”

The moment she saw Xuan Jingchi storm out in wounded fury, she immediately regretted it.

She knew her insincere words had deeply hurt someone with a pure and unblemished heart.

But why had things come to this?

She loved Jingchi, and she knew Jingchi loved her too.

Yet why, after that incident, had Xuan Jingchi’s tone when speaking to her changed so much? Last night, she’d even spoken without looking at her.

She vaguely sensed that those words had already carved an impassable chasm between them.

They could never go back to how things were before.

She feared that Xuan Jingchi—whether out of pique or disappointment—might actually turn to favor other women because of her words.

And all of this was something she herself had caused.

Tears welled up from her heart to her eyes once more, rolling down her cheeks.

Xiao Yueli’s heart trembled painfully with remorse, her delicate frame shaking uncontrollably.

Suddenly, she was pulled into a warm embrace.

“Yueli, don’t cry, don’t be sad,” the person kissed away her tears, “Seeing you like this breaks my heart.”

The same tender affection as before.

Xiao Yueli’s tears could no longer be restrained, flooding forth as she buried herself in Xuan Jingchi’s arms.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to say those things. I don’t know how they came out. I was afraid you might have other women someday, afraid you’d abandon me, afraid you’d stop loving me!”

In that moment, all the pain and insecurity in Xiao Yueli’s heart poured out like her tears—endless and overwhelming.

Xuan Jingchi held her tightly, kissing her hair, “How could I ever abandon you? You’re my Empress, my love, the only one I deeply cherish.”

“But you’re the Emperor. You’ll always have a harem eventually. Every emperor does, don’t they?”

Finally, Xuan Jingchi understood the deep-seated insecurity hidden within Xiao Yueli’s heart.

“Those emperors you speak of were men. Men who wanted to possess more women naturally claimed having three thousand beauties was their divine right. But I’m not a man, and I’ve no desire for so many women.”

Hearing this, Xiao Yueli realized there was truth to it. Then Xuan Jingchi continued, “Where I grew up, no matter how wealthy or powerful a man was, he could only have one wife—nominally, just one.”

Xiao Yueli found this unbelievable, “Truly? Even an emperor could only have one wife?”

Xuan Jingchi nodded, “Of course.”

She smiled, “Now can you rest easy? I won’t have other women, nor a vast harem. My inner court has only you, my Empress.”

A faint blush colored Xiao Yueli’s cheeks as the weight in her heart was finally lifted.

From then on, they would belong only to each other.

The two embraced in the silent bedchamber, with only the crackling of candlelight to be heard.

Xiao Yueli lay against her chest, listening to the steady heartbeat, feeling utterly at peace.

After a long while, she suddenly asked, “If you had to face only me for your whole life… would you grow tired of me?”

“Never.”

“Don’t answer so quickly. Seeing only me every day is like eating the same dish at every meal. No matter how delicious it is, over time, you’ll grow tired of it.”

Xuan Jingchi laughed, “Empress, why compare yourself to a dish? Well, if you were a dish, you’d definitely be my favorite! I could eat you every day without getting bored. I’d only feel like it’s never enough, always craving more.”

“Really?”

“Of course it’s true,” Xuan Jingchi whispered in her ear, “Shall we start eating tonight? It’s been several days, and I’ve missed it terribly.”

Xiao Yueli didn’t understand at first, but when realization dawned, her cheeks flushed crimson. She pouted, “People aren’t dishes that can be eaten and digested. Clearly, you enjoy spouting nonsense.”

Though her words scolded, Xuan Jingchi saw the shyness in her expression and the bashful smile in her eyes.

Leaning over, Xuan Jingchi planted a kiss on her cheek.

Just then, Xiao Rong arrived outside the hall with a tray of light congee and pastries, announcing, “Your Majesty, the kitchen has sent the refreshments.”

“Perfect, bring them in.”

Xiao Rong entered and set out bowls, chopsticks, the congee, side dishes, and a plate of snow-white, delicate cakes.

Noticing Xiao Yueli’s surprised look, Xuan Jingchi explained with a smile, “I’ve been reviewing memorials all day and got hungry, so I had the kitchen prepare some late-night snacks.”

She pulled Xiao Yueli to sit with her at the table. “Keep me company and have some too.”

Xiao Rong immediately grasped Xuan Jingchi’s intention—the Empress might refuse if asked to eat alone, but she would surely partake if it meant accompanying the Emperor.

Grateful, Xiao Rong said, “This servant will fetch another set of utensils for Her Majesty.”

Impressed by her quick understanding, Xuan Jingchi remarked to Xiao Yueli, “Your maid is truly excellent—loyal and clever.”

Xiao Yueli teased, “Since Your Majesty likes her so much, why not take her into the harem?”

Her tone was playful.

Xuan Jingchi rolled her eyes and retorted, “Fine, you’re deliberately provoking me again.”

“This consort wouldn’t dare.”

“If you didn’t dare, you wouldn’t say it! Hmph, just wait and see how I’ll ‘eat’ you tonight!”

“Your Majesty is speaking nonsense again.”

“You’ll see whether it’s nonsense or not.”

“Your Majesty, indulging in beauty makes you a foolish ruler.”

“You called me a foolish ruler again, so today I’ll show you just how foolish I can be.”

Their playful bickering back and forth made Xiao Yueli’s mood a world apart from how she felt during the day.

When Xiao Rong brought the utensils, she accompanied Xuan Jingchi in eating half a bowl of porridge and, at Xuan Jingchi’s insistence, also had a piece of cake.

Xuan Jingchi, seeing how soft, fragrant, and melt-in-the-mouth the cake was, felt reassured enough to let Xiao Yueli eat it.

After their late-night meal, Xiao Yueli wanted to bathe, but Xuan Jingchi said, “We just ate; it’s not good to bathe right away. Let’s go for a walk instead.”

Xiao Yueli covered her mouth and laughed, “It’s so late already, and you want to go for a walk?”

Xuan Jingchi replied, “We’ll just move around outside the hall. It’s perfect since no one’s out there now.” With that, she took Xiao Yueli’s hand and led her outside.

Above them, the bright moon hung in the sky, its light pure and clear.

Xuan Jingchi said, “Let’s dance.”

“Dance?” Xiao Yueli was stunned. “I don’t know how. Are you talking about that dance from the other night? The one on your birthday?”

“Hmm? You saw that! No, this is much simpler than that. You just need to follow the rhythm and move however you like.” Xuan Jingchi stepped forward, placed Xiao Yueli’s left hand on her own right shoulder, rested her own hand on Xiao Yueli’s waist, then lifted Xiao Yueli’s arm and held her hand.

“Just follow my lead. It’s fine if you step on me. We’ll dance a romantic step.” Xuan Jingchi chuckled softly and began humming a light, graceful melody.

Xiao Yueli found the tune quite unique, unlike any traditional music she had heard. Its rhythm was lively and beautiful, carrying an exotic charm.

She looked at the person before her, bathed in silver moonlight, gentle as water, her smiling eyes filled with tenderness, sparkling like gemstones under the moon.

Xiao Yueli followed those gentle, affectionate eyes, moving in step with her graceful figure, swaying back and forth.

From the initial nervousness and unfamiliarity, she gradually relaxed, merging with the melody.

She spun under Xuan Jingchi’s guidance, danced with her, spun again, was embraced by her, met her tender gaze, leaned into her soft embrace, and danced gracefully with her once more.

Her body grew lighter, her heart floating along, and she couldn’t help but smile.

In that moment, she felt all her worries vanish.

In their eyes, she saw only each other.

That night, they went to bed very late, kissing passionately, caressing each other’s smooth, delicate skin, whispering words of love, calling each other’s names, lost in the whirlpool of love.

Until Xiao Yueli, exhausted, fell asleep in Xuan Jingchi’s arms.

Before dawn, Xuan Jingchi glanced at the sleeping Xiao Yueli beside her, curled her lips into a smile, then quietly slipped out of bed to dress. It was time for the morning court session.

Nuanxiang noticed, once again, that the Emperor had risen first—how strange.

Xuan Jingchi yawned and said, “Come, help me with my attire. Don’t disturb the Empress’s sleep today, and don’t prepare breakfast for her either.”