Desk-mate, Do You Like Me? - Chapter 84

Chapter 84

“I’ve looked into you, Xu Qing.”

This sentence was like a piece of ice dropped into coffee, instantly freezing the surrounding air. Xu Qing’s knuckles gripping the cup turned slightly white, but he did not look away, instead calmly meeting Yu Wenxiu’s gaze, awaiting her next words.

The waiter arrived precisely with the Geisha coffee. The rich, fruity aroma momentarily broke the stagnation. Yu Wenxiu elegantly stirred the coffee with a small spoon, not rushing to drink, as if the sharp words she had just uttered were merely a casual greeting.

“Your family, your academics, your… performance during high school,” she paused, each word seemingly carefully chosen, “I even looked into your situation with Bai Sheng a little.”

Xu Qing’s heart sank. He had expected Yu Wenxiu to investigate, but not to this extent, digging up the long-buried past between him and Bai Sheng.

He, Bai Sheng, and his cousin Bai Ziqi, didn’t get along well. The two of them were completely different from the pristine appearances they presented. Not to mention, Bai Sheng was the first person he ever liked.

It felt like someone had forcibly peeled off his innermost layer of protection, exposing old wounds he didn’t want to show.

He took a breath, forcing his voice to remain steady: “So, what conclusion did you draw?”

Yu Wenxiu raised her eyes, her gaze sharp: “The conclusion is that you are a very hardworking and capable young man. Gaining admission to Peking University through recommendation, receiving scholarships, and even having a bit of a reputation in your professional field. Putting everything else aside, I personally admire people who work hard.”

This unexpected affirmation did not make Xu Qing feel relieved; he knew the ‘but’ was imminent.

“But,” Yu Wenxiu put down the silver spoon, the cup and saucer making a crisp clinking sound, “Xu Qing, life is not maintained solely by hard work and affection. Li Mo’s future should not be limited by your current… uncertain relationship. He deserves a life that is more stable, easier, and better able to help him soar. And you, along with your family background, are destined to become a burden to him.”

Her words were not aggressive; they were even calm. But it was this very calmness that made every word seem particularly cruel and true.

“The ‘burden’ you refer to, does it mean I can’t bring him career resources, or does it mean my existence will bring shame to your family?” Xu Qing asked directly, an almost imperceptible chill entering his voice.

“Both,” Yu Wenxiu answered without evasion. “Love can’t feed you, and passion always fades. When his sharp edges are worn down by reality, and he’s overwhelmed by trivial matters, he will regret his choice today. And I, as his mother, cannot watch him take the wrong path.”

She took a cream-colored envelope from her handbag and pushed it toward Xu Qing. Its thickness was considerable.

“Inside is a check, enough for you to complete your studies, and even support your further education abroad, to explore a broader world. Leaving Li Mo is a better choice for both you and him.”

Xu Qing looked at the envelope but did not reach for it.

He remembered Li Mo’s slightly furrowed brow while talking on the phone on the balcony, his late-night work for their future, and his firmness when he hugged him and said, “Don’t be afraid, I’m here.”

He slowly looked up, the previous tension and unease in his eyes receding, replaced by a clear resolve.

“Ms. Yu,” he began, his voice much steadier than before. “I understand your concerns. My background, everything I possess, is indeed incomparable to your family’s.”

He paused, his gaze unflinchingly meeting Yu Wenxiu’s scrutinizing eyes.

“However, you underestimate Li Mo, and you underestimate me. We are together not for fleeting passion, but to build a future of our own, together. That future may not be smooth sailing, but we will face it side by side. The resources and connections you mention, I can strive for with my own abilities; the stability you speak of, we will create together. Li Mo choosing me is not a detour on his life’s journey, but a straight path that we have jointly chosen and need to walk with effort.”

He gently pushed the envelope back.

“I don’t need this. I won’t use leaving him to prove anything, nor will I use money to measure our feelings.”

Yu Wenxiu looked at him, and for the first time, her face showed a noticeable emotional fluctuation—a mix of surprise, annoyance, and perhaps a hint of subtle, offended admiration. She seemed not to have expected Xu Qing to refuse so directly, and with such… forceful reasoning.

The coffee had cooled slightly, and the atmosphere between the two entered a stalemate again. The sunlight outside the window shifted a few degrees, falling on the rejected envelope, reflecting a cold sheen.

Yu Wenxiu was silent for a moment, finally speaking again, a trace of coldness in her voice: “It’s good for a young man to have integrity. But I hope your ability matches your integrity. I will not forcefully interfere with you two, but I will not offer any support either. How far your path goes depends on your own fate.”

She picked up her handbag, stood up, and looked down at Xu Qing: “Remember what you said today.”

With that, she didn’t linger, turned, and left, the sound of her high heels fading away.

Xu Qing sat alone in the booth, slowly exhaling a breath he had held for a long time. His palms were covered in cold sweat, and his heart was still beating fiercely.

He knew this was only the first round. Yu Wenxiu’s temporary retreat was not approval but rather a coolly observed test. The road ahead did not seem to become easier due to this candid confrontation. Instead, the thorns ahead were revealed more clearly.

He took out his phone, looked at Li Mo’s WeChat profile picture, hesitated, but finally did not call. He needed some time to process everything alone.

…

Xu Qing sat in the coffee shop for a long time until the long-cold Americano left a dark brown stain in the cup. Yu Wenxiu’s words were like cold needles, repeatedly piercing his forced composure. The name “Bai Sheng” particularly turned her accurate investigation into a kind of humiliating exposure. She knew his weak spot, the past he least wanted to revisit.

The first person he ever liked had trampled on his nascent feelings, and along with Bai Ziqi, made his already bleak youth even more unbearable. He had never fully confessed this to Li Mo, only vaguely mentioning a past feud with the two cousins.

Now, this past had become Yu Wenxiu’s leverage to prove his “complex background” and “impure” history.

His phone vibrated. Li Mo’s name flashed on the screen. Xu Qing stared at the name for a few seconds, took a deep breath, and answered the call.

“Qing Qing? Are you done with your business? I’m almost finished here. What do you want for dinner? I’ll come pick you up.” Li Mo’s voice carried a hint of post-work fatigue, but more so, concern for him.

Xu Qing’s throat tightened. He tried to make his voice sound normal: “Mhm, almost. No need to pick me up, I’ll head straight home. What do you want to eat? I’ll pick up some groceries on the way.”

“Anything, I like whatever you make.” Li Mo paused, his voice dropping slightly. “You sound a little low-spirited? Did you run into trouble?”

“No,” Xu Qing quickly denied, his tone even taking on a forced lightness. “Just… tired from reading for too long. I’m heading back now.”

Hanging up the phone, Xu Qing looked at the neon lights gradually illuminating outside the window, a heavy feeling in his heart. The concealment made him feel guilty, but he was even more unwilling, at the moment Yu Wenxiu had thrown out the name “Bai Sheng,” to fully disclose everything to Li Mo. That would bring up too much past that needed explaining, and he wasn’t ready.

He stood up and left the coffee shop. The evening breeze was cool but couldn’t blow away the vexation in his heart.

…

Back home, Xu Qing put on an apron and started working in the kitchen. Chopping vegetables, washing, heating oil in the wok—the familiar routine allowed him to momentarily clear his mind. When Li Mo returned, the aroma of dinner had already filled the living room.

“Smells good,” Li Mo hugged him from behind, resting his chin on his neck, taking a deep breath. Then he slightly frowned. “Why do you smell of coffee? The hand-brewed Geisha kind?”

Xu Qing’s body stiffened imperceptibly. Li Mo was always sensitive to smells. He steadied the spatula in his hand and pretended to be casual: “Such a keen nose, are you a dog? Someone I used to know works part-time at Blue Bay Coffee and insisted I go in to try a new item.”

Li Mo was silent for a moment, his arms tightening, his voice muffled against his shoulder: “What friend? Guy or girl?”

“Guy, you don’t know him, a primary school classmate.” Xu Qing turned his face, rubbing against Li Mo’s hair. “You’re getting jealous over this. Go wash your hands and eat.”

Li Mo didn’t press further, but Xu Qing could tell he wasn’t completely convinced. This made the stone in his heart feel a few pounds heavier.

At the dinner table, Li Mo seemed a little distracted, looking at Xu Qing several times, about to speak but stopping himself.

“What’s wrong? Trouble at the company?” Xu Qing proactively asked.

Li Mo put down his chopsticks, looking at him, his eyes serious: “Qing Qing, has my mom… contacted you again since then?”

Xu Qing’s heart fiercely skipped a beat. He almost thought Li Mo knew something. He forced himself to stay calm and shook his head: “No. Why?”

“Nothing,” Li Mo averted his gaze and took a bite of rice. “I just feel like she’s been too quiet lately. It’s not like her.”

Xu Qing lowered his eyelashes, quietly eating. Yu Wenxiu’s silence was because she had already made her move, a cold arrow aimed straight at the heart. All she had to do now was observe, watching how they would respond, or rather, watching how Xu Qing would prove he was not a “burden.”

“Don’t worry too much,” Xu Qing put a piece of spare rib on his plate. “Maybe… she’s come to terms with it.”

Li Mo looked at him, his expression complex, and finally just sighed: “I hope so.”

…

That night, Xu Qing did not sleep soundly. His dreams were a tangle of Yu Wenxiu’s cold face, Bai Sheng’s mocking eyes, and Li Mo’s figure turning away in disappointment.

He woke up with a start. Li Mo’s breathing was even beside him; he was fast asleep.

Xu Qing opened his eyes wide in the darkness. Yu Wenxiu’s last words clearly echoed in his ears—”I hope your ability matches your integrity.”

He knew he couldn’t afford to be passive anymore. He had to do something, not just through verbal refusal and statements, but through tangible action, to prove that his and Li Mo’s future was worth looking forward to.

Xu Qing sat quietly in the darkness for a moment, then quietly got out of bed, picked up his laptop, and walked to the living room. He needed action, needed to start planning immediately, to channel the suffocating feeling in his chest into a ladder to climb.

He opened his laptop, the cool white light reflecting on his serious face. He first searched the official website of Peking University’s School of Information Science and Technology, meticulously reviewing freshman admission guidelines, scholarship policies, and application requirements for various assistantship and research positions. He recorded key dates and application requirements in a document. This was his foundation, and he had to seize every opportunity the campus offered.

Next, he opened a few well-known programmer freelance platforms. He skillfully filtered tasks, looking for small projects that matched his current skills, had short cycles, and could yield quick returns. He knew that compared to vague “big company internships,” concrete project experience and income were more crucial to him at this stage, and would build his confidence faster.

Then, he searched for information on competitions like the “National College Student Computer Design Competition” and the “ACM-ICPC Asia Regional Contest.” These competitions carried high weight, and achieving a rank would undoubtedly be the most powerful proof of his abilities. He recorded the registration deadlines and competition formats one by one.

Finally, he clicked on a technical forum and bookmarked several essential posts about machine learning for beginners and contributing to open-source projects. He knew that merely completing coursework was insufficient; he had to maintain sensitivity to cutting-edge technology and self-learning ability.

After completing all of this, the sky outside was already turning gray. Xu Qing closed his laptop, rubbed his tired eyes. His body was exhausted, but his heart felt strangely settled. A clear and pragmatic path unfolded before him: secure financial independence through campus resources, accumulate experience and capital through practical projects, enhance his resume through competitions, and continuously learn to maintain technical acuity.

He returned to the bedroom. Li Mo was still sound asleep, a subtle weariness etched on his brows. Xu Qing gently lay down, looking at his peaceful sleeping face, a more resolute determination swelling within him. He would not let Yu Wenxiu’s prophecy come true. He would not become Li Mo’s “burden.” He would use his own hands to build the future they shared.

…

A few days later, Xu Qing’s life rhythm visibly accelerated. Besides preparing for the start of school, he took on two small code optimization projects, staying late at the library every day, debugging and modifying on the computer screen. Li Mo noticed his busyness.

“What are you busy with lately? Being so secretive,” Li Mo asked one evening, watching Xu Qing pick up his laptop immediately after dinner.

Xu Qing looked up from the screen and smiled. This time, he didn’t evade the question: “Took on some freelance work, to practice and earn some pocket money.”

Li Mo raised an eyebrow, walking behind him to look at the densely packed code on the screen: “What kind of freelance work? Is the difficulty high?”

“Not high, some basic stuff,” Xu Qing said lightly. He didn’t want to worry Li Mo, nor did he want to seem like he was trying to prove something on purpose. “Just taking it as an early start to university courses.”

Li Mo looked at his focused profile. The light cast a small shadow beneath his eyelashes, making him look particularly earnest. He reached out and ruffled Xu Qing’s hair: “Don’t overdo it. If you need any help, tell me.”

“I know,” Xu Qing felt a warmth in his heart and nodded.

However, just as Xu Qing was settling into his planned routine, an unexpected phone call broke the peace. The caller ID showed an unfamiliar local number.

Xu Qing hesitated, then walked to the balcony to answer.

“Hello, is this Xu Qing?” A somewhat familiar, yet slightly strange and hesitant male voice came from the other end.

Xu Qing’s heart inexplicably tightened: “It is. Who is this?”

The opposite end was silent for two seconds, then the person spoke, their voice carrying a hint of stiffness:

“It’s me, Bai Sheng. I heard you’re also going to Beijing? Long time no see. Want to meet up and chat?”