Dear Ex-Fiancé, I Hope You Regret Everything - Chapter 44

“Lady Windia!! You’re being far too unruly today!! We still haven’t finished your geology, history, and dance lessons!!”

“Ehh… It’s fine to skip just one day, right? I can do it tomorrow. ”

“You said that yesterday and the day before too!”

“Ah, enough! You’re so annoying! Fine, I’ll do it! I’ll do it!”

My tutor Castine pushed up her magic tool glasses that could automatically grade assignments. Even though she already looked strict, this made her appear even stricter.

“Very well then, now, today we’ll be working through this textbook…” While she was rustling through her papers, I slipped out of the room.

As I ran down the hallway, I could hear Castine shouting from behind me.

“L-Lady Windia!!!!”

When I glanced back, I saw her desperately chasing after me.

That just made it more fun, so I made a funny face to tease her.

THUD!!!

“Owwww!!!!”

Since I’d been running while looking backward, I seemed to have crashed into someone.

As I sat there on my bottom, I looked up at the person offering me a hand.

“F-Father…!?”

“Is that you, Windia? Are you hurt? …Oh?”

(Oh no…)

“Y-Your Majesty… huff, huff,”

“Castine… Hah-hum, Windia, have you slipped out of your lessons again?”

Just as I was about to say “It’s not like that…” Castine tattled on me.

“That’s right! Please say something to her, Your Majesty. It’s impossible to conduct proper lessons!”

At Castine’s complaint, Father twitched slightly.

“…Windia. You will likely become this country’s queen someday. Governing a nation without knowledge isn’t something that can be done so easily.”

“But I never wanted that! You and Mother decided that on your own! If this is how it’s going to be, I wish I’d been born a commoner who could live freely and play as I please!!!”

I didn’t really understand what I was saying myself. It felt like I’d just punched Father with words, driven purely by emotion. Strangely, I didn’t feel any sense of relief. Instead, an even more wicked emotion swelled up inside me, making me want to say something even worse.

But Father looked at me with such a deeply hurt expression that I suddenly felt unbearably ashamed and ran from the spot.

“Lady Windia!!!”

“Leave her be.”

“Your Majesty… b-but…”

“I didn’t willingly accept everything either. I understand that child’s feelings all too well, painfully so.”

Anxiety swirled where Castine was staring.

✳︎ ✳︎ ✳︎

“Oh my, Windia said that?”

“That’s probably why she barely touched her dinner. So, I’m sorry, but could you talk to her as well? There’s something that’s got me a bit worried…”

“It’s about time for her to go to bed, I suppose. Perfect timing—shall I sleep with Windia tonight?”

“Eh…?”

Instantly, Lord Skyford froze solid like ice. Stiff and brittle.

“Is something wrong?”

“Then who am I supposed to sleep with…?”

“Once in a while, it would do you good to sleep alone peacefully.”

“I don’t want that!!!”

“Is that something you should declare so boldly…?”

“No—I will say it boldly! If I can’t sleep with Iris, I’d rather not sleep at all!”

“Goodness, what a troublesome man. Anyway, I’m sleeping with Windia tonight.”

“Don’t go! I-Iris…!!”

✳︎ ✳︎ ✳︎

I heard three modest knocks. Just from that, I knew (It’s Mother).

“Win! Dia”

A distinctive way of calling my name, like a song, with a bouncing, lilting tone.

In private, when calling me for the first time, Mother always calls me like that.

“Mother, I’m sorry, but I’m not in the mood for a picture book today.”

“Oh, is that so? How sad… Mother doesn’t think she’ll be able to sleep tonight for some reason. Shall we talk a little?”

“…You heard from Father, didn’t you?”

“Was I that obvious?”

“Painfully so.”

We both sat down on the bed and drank hot milk with cinnamon. After adding honey, we stirred it with cinnamon sticks.

“You wouldn’t understand, Mother. Even Yonshua from Starelesska gets to play more than I do.”

“Listen, Windia. Your suffering is yours alone. But do you really think nobody else struggles at all? Even Mother thought, when she was a child, ‘I wish I could play a little more.'”

“Hmph. But you’re the one making me study. Do adults forget how they felt when they were children?”

“Perhaps they do. That’s why Mother wants to properly listen to your feelings. Because adults forget all about how they felt as children.”

I nodded repeatedly and began to speak, haltingly.

“You know, when I was born, I heard a voice.”

“Eh… You, that…”

“It said, ‘If you wish for anything, I’ll grant it for you.’ But even when I wish I could play, I never get to. It’s just study, study, dance, study, every single day. They’re liars. Hey, was that your voice, Mother? Or Father’s? Either way, they’re huge liars!”

Mother seemed to hold within her an emotion different from hurt—one I didn’t yet know. She simply gazed at me quietly and said only, “I see.”

That night, Mother stroked my head until I fell asleep, and probably even after.

✳︎ ✳︎ ✳︎

BANG BANG BANG!! BANG BANG BANG!!!

“So noisy, what is that sound?”

When I tried to push aside the rough, scratchy blanket, it felt incredibly damp and heavy, and I wondered if I’d wet the bed.

(That’s strange, the last time I wet the bed was when I was five…)

Cautiously, I lowered my gaze and saw that, for some reason, I was wearing clothes patched up all over.

“Wha…”

With heavy, stomping footsteps, something hit me on the head.

“Windia! What are you doing! Get up and fetch some water!”

“…Huh?”

A large-bellied woman, sweating, was yelling angrily at me.

Is she a new maid? How disrespectful.

“Y-You insolent fool! Who do you think I am?”

“Are you still dreaming or something? Princess playtime is over!! I never should have let you be named after the princess!!! All you have is a haughty attitude!!”

When I looked down at my own hands, the slightly smaller palms were clearly covered in calluses. These aren’t my hands.

“If you understand, then hurry up and fetch the water! And wash your face while you’re at it!”

Terrified, I rushed out. Unfamiliar shoes, an unfamiliar well.

Of course, I’ve never drawn well water before. But for some reason, my body remembered the motions.

(Heavy!!!)

Then, when I splashed water on my face, a reflection of black hair and a sun-tanned face stared back from the water’s surface.

“Who? What’s happened to me!?”

(But I have blonde hair and fair skin.)

Every aspect of the identity I inherited from my parents had vanished.

Plop—I squatted down, and the weeds heavy with morning dew soaked my bottom.

How utterly miserable.

At times like this, calling for someone would usually help, but I clearly understood that wouldn’t work here.

“Ah! Windia!! Slacking off here! What are you doing! Hurry up and bring the water! I can’t do the laundry!”

“…If you’re going to say that…”

“Huh?”

“…If you’re going to say that, why don’t you carry it yourself?”

The woman in front of me looked like she was about to hit me, so I instinctively braced myself.

But surprisingly, she simply said, “Is that so?” and lifted the water bucket.

(What, if you could carry it from the start…)

Something seemed off. Her breathing was ragged, she kept setting the bucket down, and she wasn’t making any progress.

“Um…”

“Ugh…”

Finally, she clutched her stomach and crouched down.

“Are you alright? Um…”

“Someone… g-go call…”

“Call who…?”

“The usual midwife… hurry…”

Who’s the usual “Sanba”?

Before I could think, my feet were racing faster than the wind. Strangely, I wasn’t even out of breath.

Ahead lay unfamiliar places and an unknown way of life.

Passing houses showing signs of repairs, my body automatically knocked on the door of one particular home. I don’t know this house. But my body acted naturally.

“Who is it? Oh, from Yuran’s place. Did something happen to your mom!?”

Seeing my frantic state, their expression changed immediately.

When she said “mom,” I realized that woman must be my mother, and my head nodded naturally.

“Wait here a moment,” they said, grabbing some kind of bag, then “Let’s hurry,” and we retraced my path back.

✳︎ ✳︎ ✳︎

When I woke up the next day, I was sleeping in an unbelievably luxurious room.

I’m sure yesterday, I was gathering firewood when night fell before I knew it, and though I hurried back, I got scolded badly by Mom.

(But why…)

Sleeping beside me must be Her Highness, Queen Iris.

This must mean I’ve become a princess!! I thought.

(What do I do! My dream came true!)

Blonde hair and fair skin… so many dresses, necklaces, brooches.

In front of the mirror, I spun around again and again, pinching my cheeks.

(Now I can live elegantly and play every single day!)

I gazed dreamily at my smooth, callus-free palms.

“Lady Windia, it’s time for your studies. Please attend your lessons properly today!”

“Huh?”

“It’s not ‘huh.’ Yes, today we’ll begin with history.”

“Wait, let me change my dress! I have so many now!”

“Wh-What are you saying?”

“Well, don’t all royals get to change clothes every hour?”

The woman with upturned eyes and glasses looked bewildered, holding her head.

“Is that not right?”

“Lady Windia, I had been reflecting that perhaps I spoke too harshly yesterday. Sigh. I knew you were a handful, but I thought for certain you had been properly taught by your parents to avoid excessive luxury.”

“Hey, you…”

“You!? My! Where did you learn such language! It seems I must thoroughly educate you today!!”

She thrust a textbook at me, but it was just packed with difficult things, and I couldn’t make heads or tails of it.

(What is this! So boring!!)

What drove me to utter despair was realizing that, although I thought we’d get a break at 12:00, only 30 minutes had passed.

I was forced to just listen to incomprehensible talk, repeatedly write things down on paper, and sometimes take tests. This was the most painful experience of my life.

(If it’s like this, fetching water was better!)

The only saving grace was that even for things I didn’t know, my hand moved smoothly on its own.

(My bottom hurts…)

It was going numb. When I fidgeted, wanting to move, I was scolded to sit up straight.

(I hate this!! Mom!!!)