After the Corrupt Official Was Coveted by the New Emperor - Chapter 17

Is it so hard to admit your own feelings?

Is it?

Ji Rong thought that, yes, it actually was quite difficult.

Moreover, he had not quite figured it out himself.

Fan Qing sat back up properly and asked seriously, “Come on, tell me. Where exactly is the point of your hesitation?”

“I just do not understand. If it is true, when did the transition happen?”

As soon as Fan Qing opened his mouth, Ji Rong anticipated him and spoke first. “Do not speak yet. Let me finish.”

“By the order of the Late Emperor, I was appointed as the Crown Prince’s Junior Tutor when he was twelve. I taught him for over two years, and when he turned fourteen, I stopped.”

“I did indeed have people keep a close watch on him for the following two years, just as you said. But there was absolutely no hint of what you are suggesting in that. It was simply because I saw that he was pitiable. It was more like the concern of an older brother for a younger brother.”

Ji Rong was slowly sorting through the timeline.

“When he was eighteen and nineteen, I was extremely busy, as you know. I did not have any spare time to pay attention to him. Therefore, for almost those two years, I had no contact with him.”

“If it really is as you say, where was the turning point where things changed?”

Ji Rong frowned and said, “I truly cannot figure it out, Fan Qing. Speaking now, it seems it is no longer that pure relationship of a brother to a younger brother. On the contrary, there really is a bit of”

He did not continue speaking; he stopped right there.

“Hmm.”

Fan Qing was deep in thought.

“I think I understand what you mean,” Fan Qing said. “Then think about it again. Is there anything you missed? You said yourself you have been very busy these past few years. Maybe you were so busy you forgot.”

“How could I forget something like this?”

Fan Qing: “Think about it.”

Think.

Ji Rong forced himself to start remembering.

Fan Qing was afraid of the heat. Seeing that Ji Rong would not be able to come up with anything in a short amount of time, he simply ran over to crouch by the ice basin. The servants had been sent away, so he had to rely on himself to fan the air with a folding fan.

Ji Rong bit his lip, his thoughts drifting.

His thoughts wandered for a long while, but he still could not grasp the key point.

Fan Qing had grown bored of waiting and casually chatted about other things. “In the eyes of the common people, you are currently both a dead man and notorious. I will not mention the former, but are you really going to let the latter go ignored?”

Ji Rong said indifferently, “Whatever.”

“How can you say whatever? Do you want your name to stink for ten thousand years?”

Fan Qing yawned. “Do not think about it. What is there to think about?”

“To use the words of that bookshop clerk,” Fan Qing smiled craftily, “love knows not where it starts, nor where it ends. Why agonize over it? It is enough that you understand whether these feelings are true for yourself.”

Ji Rong: “…”

It was fine until it was mentioned. Now that Fan Qing had brought it up, Ji Rong’s mind was filled with that wretched book.

“I am leaving.”

Ji Rong stood up. Since he could not find an answer from Fan Qing, he did not want to stay here any longer.

Fan Qing did not want to go out into the heat. He stayed crouched by the ice basin and waved a hand as a farewell.

It was hot outside. After leaving Fan Qing’s place, Ji Rong had nowhere else to go, so he could only return once again to the Emperor’s residence in the temporary palace.

Qi Zhaoxuan was still in a coma and had not woken up. Ji Rong sat for a while, and drowsiness slowly crept into his heart. He leaned against a small table and fell asleep.

He had a dream.

The dream was somewhat distorted. The visible range was only a small spot centered on him.

Dark mist swirled around him, but the thick fog gradually dissipated as he walked forward.

Conversations seemed to drift from the dark mist ahead. The voices sounded familiar, but he could not place them for a moment.

“What do you think of the reforms Ji Rong proposed the other day?”

“What is there to think? A wicked man doing wicked deeds. He simply wants to win over the nobility for profit,” the speaker sneered. “But we must be on guard. We cannot let all this profit fall into Ji Rong’s pocket alone.”

Ji Rong heard this and finally remembered.

No wonder he could not recall them earlier. These two were killed by him a year ago for opposing him.

Why would he dream of such unlucky people?

There was a tree in front of him. Ji Rong used it to hide his silhouette. He could not remember which year this had taken place.

After all, over the past few years, there were countless people who found him eyesore. Those who spoke ill of him to his face or behind his back were beyond numbering. He could not possibly remember every single one of them.

“It is simply lawlessness. Old Wei is a veteran of three reigns, yet yesterday, Ji Rong directly stripped him of his power and forced him to resign and return to his hometown.”

The other person chimed in, “They say it was a voluntary retirement, but everyone knows it was Ji Rong’s doing.”

Ji Rong remembered now.

He stood behind the tree, quietly listening without moving. Although his heart felt no ripples now, a faint, phantom anger welled up, though it was not prominent.

Ji Rong pondered it and felt that this emotion probably belonged to his younger self.

Since it was a dream, it was restoring his state of mind from back then, not the present.

He had long since been tempered into steel.

Ji Rong would no longer have emotional fluctuations because of these things.

He vaguely remembered what happened next that day.

As those two spoke, footsteps gradually approached from not far away.

For some reason, it was a bit sweltering. Ji Rong opened his folding fan, and the light movement brought a slight breeze.

The conversation between the two officials stopped abruptly. Ji Rong looked up.

At nineteen, Qi Zhaoxuan’s stature was already tall. The greenness and naivety of the past had long since faded. He stood straight as a pine, with broad shoulders and a narrow waist. His features had already gained steady, sharp edges.

The only thing that had not changed was Qi Zhaoxuan’s pale complexion, which had remained the same for a decade.

The two officials exchanged a glance. They clearly had not expected to be caught by the Crown Prince and performed their bows with a guilty conscience.

“Since you are court officials, instead of thinking about fulfilling your duties and keeping to your places, you discuss high-ranking ministers behind their backs.”

Qi Zhaoxuan’s tone was grim. “Discussing matters without knowing the full picture, is this how you two conduct yourselves as officials?”

Cold sweat surfaced on the brows of the two officials. They did not know which part had displeased the Crown Prince.

They muttered, “The Crown Prince’s reprimand is just. We shall certainly be cautious in word and deed in the future and would never dare to do such things that go against rules and etiquette.”

In the dream, his body was not under his control. After those two left, Ji Rong met Qi Zhaoxuan’s deep, bottomless gaze.

Emotions he could not understand flickered in those eyes. Ji Rong stood rooted to the spot, his words and actions not under his control. He could only watch as Qi Zhaoxuan walked toward him.

Qi Zhaoxuan walked up to him and called out softly, “Father Chancellor.”

He heard his former self say gently, “Your Highness, I have long since ceased to be the Junior Tutor. I cannot bear this title.”

Perhaps out of their years of friendship, he advised, “The Emperor does not like Your Highness being too close to me. Next time, Your Highness should not speak on my behalf.”

“I am unwilling.”

“Why?” Qi Zhaoxuan said. “Clearly, you are only acting on orders. Why do they, as outsiders, get to comment as they please without distinguishing black from white?”

“It is not important,” he said. “The ruler and the minister each have their own mission. Since I am a minister, I should naturally serve the ruler.”

“How others evaluate or speak of me is not important to me.”

At this point, he gave a self-deprecating laugh. “How could a monarch ever be wrong?”

How could a monarch be wrong? The only ones at fault are the ministers who did not offer timely advice.

History is easily rewritten. In a thousand years, the only name filled with countless crimes will be his.

He saw Qi Zhaoxuan’s expression of forbearance, as if he did not want to hear those words.

The thick fog swept in once more, swallowing everything in the dream.

Ji Rong was lost in thought.

If he remembered correctly, this seemed to be the last time he and Qi Zhaoxuan met before the Late Emperor died.

After that, he was drugged by Qi Zhaoxuan and imprisoned in Qianqing Palace until today.

The face of Qi Zhaoxuan in the dream had just disappeared when Ji Rong woke up. The moment he opened his eyes, he was faced with that familiar face again.

He had fallen asleep unknowingly, so he naturally did not know when Qi Zhaoxuan had woken up. Moreover, the man was sitting right in front of him, staring at him without blinking, like a tiger or leopard locking onto its prey.

Ji Rong’s movements paused. Then, he sat up as if nothing had happened and asked naturally, “How is the wound?”

He was no longer in a hurry. The only reason he had been so anxious at the bottom of the canyon was the fear of the wound worsening. Now that they were back, the imperial physicians had superb skills; there was nothing to worry about.

Qi Zhaoxuan answered with a different question. “Is Father Chancellor injured?”

“No.”

“Falling from such a height, are there no injuries at all?” Qi Zhaoxuan did not seem to believe Ji Rong’s words.

At those words, Ji Rong fell into silence.

What could he say?

Ji Rong was a bit distracted.

Although Qi Zhaoxuan was semi-conscious when he fell off the cliff, it seemed that out of physical instinct, the moment Ji Rong grabbed his hand, he turned the tables. He pulled Ji Rong into his chest and protected him firmly. Ji Rong had basically suffered no injuries.

He just did not know why he had lost consciousness under those circumstances.

Because of this, Qi Zhaoxuan’s body was covered in many wounds of various sizes.

Ji Rong denied it again. “No.”

“I heard from Li Youde that we fell into the water?”

As if he had no reason when he woke up in the cave, Qi Zhaoxuan only now thought to ask this question.

“Yes,” Ji Rong nodded. “Fan Qing fished us out.”

Upon receiving the affirmative answer, Qi Zhaoxuan’s face suddenly became very unsightly. But after a short while, it returned to normal.

Qi Zhaoxuan looked at him.

The two stared at each other for a long time. Ji Rong was the first to give in and moved his gaze away.

He had just stood up when he was pulled down by Qi Zhaoxuan and forced to sit back down.

Even though his right hand was still injured, his strength was not small. He gripped Ji Rong’s wrist until it pained.

“Ji Rong, why did you not run?”

Qi Zhaoxuan’s voice was very low, and his gaze shifted away. He lowered his eyes as if he were afraid to receive an answer.

Ji Rong said calmly, “Did you not say that if I ran, you would not give me a peaceful life?”

His tone was calm, but his heart was not.

Ji Rong broke free from Qi Zhaoxuan’s restraint, stood up, and walked outside.

The blazing summer sun shone down on him. The heat swept through his body, and the intense light made it impossible to keep his eyes open. Even the breeze was filled with sweltering air.

Why did I not run?

The feelings he had been afraid to face reached a climax at this moment. Every part of his body was shouting, and he finally admitted it.

Ji Rong raised his hand to block the scorching sun and suddenly let out a cold laugh, finding it inexplicably funny.

I actually really do like him.