After Pretending to be an Idiot, I Was Targeted by the Cold-Blooded Zhangyin - Chapter 38

Gu Feiyi held Xie Changsheng for a while, then suddenly lowered his head, pressing the tip of his nose against the boy’s fluffy crown. He sniffed lightly.

Xie Changsheng flailed his hands in every direction to show his resistance: “Don’t wipe your snot on my head!!!”

Gu Feiyi: “…”

He was angered into a laugh by Xie Changsheng’s ridiculous thought. He was about to say something when Feng Wang’s voice came from outside.

“Master, it is time to go to the Hall of Mental Cultivation.”

Gu Feiyi let out a light tsk. With New Year’s Eve approaching, the palace was traditionally required to host family banquets, court feasts, and perform sacrifices to Heaven and the ancestors. Naturally, the Old Emperor had dumped all these tasks onto him. Logically, they should have been finished yesterday, but the matter with the Khan had caused delays.

As a result, there were still numerous details waiting for him to discuss with the Six Boards, and a small mountain of memorials remained on his desk.

Gu Feiyi slowly released Xie Changsheng. In the next instant, he felt his embrace go empty. Looking back at Xie Changsheng, the boy had already squatted back on the ground, picking up the red plum flower he had originally thrown down. He muttered: “Plum flower… how do you say plum flower? Oh, no flower. Heavens, I am a genius.”

Gu Feiyi took his cloak, put it on, and headed for the door. Xie Changsheng, meanwhile, was lying on the floor laughing and rolling around: “I left home young and returned old! How can one tell if I am male or female! …When friends come from afar, though far away, they must be executed!”

Gu Feiyi: “…”

What on earth is all this gibberish? And why was the little fool so happy to see him leaving?

He arched an eyebrow and suddenly changed direction. “The Little Highness is coming with this servant.”

Xie Changsheng’s rolling motion suddenly froze. He blinked and let out a fake, theatrical sigh: “Ah, alas! You’re already so old, you must learn to be independent. Don’t be so clingy.”

Clingy? Him?

Gu Feiyi curled his lips into a light, airy smile. Without a word, he grabbed Xie Changsheng’s cloak, forcefully hauled him up from the floor, dressed him, and dragged him out the door.

The moment Xie Changsheng stepped outside, he felt the biting cold. He instinctively tried to dive back into the charcoal-warmed room, but Gu Feiyi caught his wrist and led him forward, making him stumble along.

Xie Changsheng was fuming—he didn’t have to go to work, so why was Gu Feiyi bothering him?

A surge of “evil” rose from his heart. He simply hopped onto Gu Feiyi’s back. “Carry me!”

Feng Wang and the other attendants following not far behind were startled, stepping forward to stop him. Gu Feiyi arched an eyebrow, using his gaze to halt them. He reached back to support Xie Changsheng’s legs, hoisting him up a bit higher.

Xie Changsheng gave a silly giggle. “I’ll pull out your white hairs for you.”

Gu Feiyi said, “This servant has no white hairs.”

“Oh,” Xie Changsheng said. “Then I’ll pull out your black hairs.”

Gu Feiyi: “…”

His soft, flat voice came from ahead: “The Little Highness is more than welcome to try.”

Xie Changsheng pretended not to understand the threat, laughing foolishly. “Try and die (try and die/pass away).”

As he spoke, Xie Changsheng actually extended two fingers to poke at the top of Gu Feiyi’s head. But before he could choose a target, the two large hands supporting his thighs suddenly tightened with force.

Xie Changsheng was thoroughly startled and quickly let go. “I won’t pull them! I won’t pull them! I don’t want you to carry me anymore either!”

He tried to jump down, but Gu Feiyi wouldn’t let him. The hands gripping his thighs actually grew even tighter. Gradually, Xie Changsheng began to feel pain; he could feel the flesh of his upper thighs being squeezed between Gu Feiyi’s fingers.

He began to hiss from the pain: “Ow! Ow ow ow ow!”

Gu Feiyi suddenly snapped back to his senses. He loosened his fingers, which had unconsciously tightened. For some reason, a conversation he had heard when he first entered the palace flashed through his mind.

It was a small maid complaining to another: “Every time I make a mistake, Xiao Sheng-zi ties me up and torments me. He only lets me go once I’m crying like a river from the pain—do you think they’re all this crazy because they’re missing that ‘thing’?”

Pulling his thoughts back, Gu Feiyi rubbed the spot on Xie Changsheng’s thigh he had just pinched. “Does it still hurt?” He then remembered something. “Is the injury completely healed? Did it leave a scar?”

Xie Changsheng asked, “What injury?”

Gu Feiyi laughed in spite of himself. “The Little Highness truly has a large heart. The injury from riding during the autumn hunt—this servant personally applied the medicine for you. Do you not remember? Or perhaps…”

He paused, his large palm sliding slightly higher, pressing against the inner thigh. “Should this servant apply medicine for the Little Highness again to help you remember?”

Xie Changsheng shuddered at the touch and hurriedly said, “It’s all better, completely healed, fully recovered—wait, that sounds like a tongue twister.”

Gu Feiyi: “…”

He carried Xie Changsheng all the way to the Hall of Mental Cultivation before finally setting him down. Xie Changsheng hopped around twice. “Whew, I’m exhausted. My legs are sore.”

Gu Feiyi: “…” He reached out and tugged Xie Changsheng’s ear. “Heartless thing.”

Xie Changsheng’s expression froze, and the tips of his ears turned red. He cautiously retreated two steps, rescuing his ear from Gu Feiyi’s hand.

Gu Feiyi arched an eyebrow, about to say something, when the Old Emperor’s voice came from inside the hall: “Is that Feiyi?”

Gu Feiyi stopped talking and led Xie Changsheng inside. The Old Emperor was lying on a soft couch, eating an orange offered to his lips by a concubine. Seeing Xie Changsheng, he reached out a hand. “Changsheng is here too. Come to me.”

Xie Changsheng acted as if he hadn’t heard, squatting on the floor to study the patterns on the ground.

The Emperor’s brow furrowed. There was something he had never told anyone—he didn’t seem to like Xie Changsheng as much as he used to. Before the head injury, Xie Changsheng was arrogant and willful, but he was interesting. He would curl up on the Emperor’s knees like a cat to act spoiled; he could read the Emperor’s mind and knew if he wanted entertainment or beauties.

But the Xie Changsheng after the injury… he was no longer close to him, nor did he understand what he wanted. And last time, when the Emperor wanted a beauty, the boy had actually knocked over a vase in public. Although it wasn’t intentional… still…

In this state, what was the difference between Xie Changsheng and Xie Chengjing or Xie Hemiao?

The Old Emperor couldn’t help but feel pained. Fortunately, his heart was filled with many, many things—like beauties and Longevity Pills. Even if he felt pained for Xie Changsheng, it wouldn’t last long. If he truly could achieve longevity, he would have many more offspring in the future. There would eventually be one that suited his heart.

The Emperor thought muddledly with his alcohol-soaked brain. He ordered a servant to bring a brocade box from a small cabinet and took out a golden pill. He chewed and swallowed the pill in a few bites. Looking at the beauty on the couch, he felt a heat in his chest and lunged at her with a loud laugh: “Bear me a prince! You shall be greatly rewarded!”

The beauty looked at Gu Feiyi and Xie Changsheng in panic, seemingly shy. But in the end, she couldn’t resist the Emperor and finally let her body go limp on the couch. “Your Majesty, that East Sea pearl you promised me last time…”

Gu Feiyi hooked his finger, and an attendant immediately stepped forward to drop the curtains, isolating the two entwined figures within. He had long since ceased to have any reaction to this. He sat at the desk and picked up a memorial.

Just as he was about to read, he thought of something and looked at Xie Changsheng. He saw Xie Changsheng covering his ears with both hands, sneakily turning around—he looked like he was about to slip out.

Gu Feiyi reached out and grabbed Xie Changsheng’s belt, hauling him back. “Why is the Little Highness running?” His thin lips curled into a slightly mocking smile. “…His Majesty will be finished very soon. There is no need to avoid it.”

It won’t even take as long as a short walk.

Xie Changsheng blinked, covering his ears and laughing foolishly, making it unclear if he understood. Gu Feiyi pulled him down to sit beside him. True to his word, within a few moments, the commotion on the Emperor’s side quieted down.

Gu Feiyi called out: “Donglian.”

Immediately, a fair-skinned little eunuch stepped forward, offering two cups of warm wine to the Emperor and the beauty. The Emperor laughed loudly: “As expected, Feiyi understands me best.”

Gu Feiyi smiled. Seeing the Emperor and the beauty drain the wine—which was spiked with contraceptive medicine—to the last drop, he cursed them as idiots in his heart.

Outwardly, he said, “As long as Your Majesty is pleased.”

Over the next few hours, Xie Changsheng witnessed a glimpse of Gu Feiyi’s methods. He would occasionally ask the Emperor how to respond to a memorial; though it was framed as a discussion, he had already secretly provided the solution, subtly making the Emperor believe it was his own idea. The Emperor actually fell for it, believing it was his own brilliance, and was coaxed into a beaming joy by Gu Feiyi.

Xie Changsheng blinked, thinking that Gu Feiyi truly mastered the art of dog training—a slap followed by a sweet treat, and the Emperor fell for it every time.

Eventually, the Emperor grew sleepy, his voice becoming more and more muddled, so Gu Feiyi stopped asking him. He organized the reviewed memorials and realized Xie Changsheng hadn’t moved for a long time.

He glanced sideways at Xie Changsheng and saw him leaning against a small corner of the desk, also nodding off. His hands, however, were still covering his ears.

“Doesn’t sleeping like that make your arms sore?” Gu Feiyi murmured to himself, removing Xie Changsheng’s hands from his ears.

Xie Changsheng woke instantly. He straightened up, and the first thing he did was look toward the Emperor’s area with groggy eyes. Seeing the Emperor asleep, he let out a sigh of relief.

Gu Feiyi looked at the expression of disgust on Xie Changsheng’s face. He reached out and pinched the boy’s chin, forcing him to face him. “Has the Little Highness forgotten what this servant said last time?”

“Huh?”

“The union of Yin and Yang is a common occurrence; there is no need to be squeamish.” “If you are squeamish…”

Gu Feiyi’s finger slid upward, reaching Xie Changsheng’s ear. The Old Emperor on the couch seemed to wake slightly, turning over. “Feiyi…”

Gu Feiyi didn’t answer. He inserted his finger into Xie Changsheng’s ear canal, moving it slowly in and out. Xie Changsheng’s breath hitched, and he immediately tried to dodge, but Gu Feiyi used his other hand to press against the back of his neck.

The Emperor fell back into a deep sleep, letting out a loud snore.

Gu Feiyi leaned closer to Xie Changsheng, the fragrance of white plum instantly enveloping the boy. Gu Feiyi smiled: “If you are squeamish, it will be hard to experience the pleasure from last time again…”

Having finished, he straightened his back with a solemn expression. Xie Changsheng covered his ears, looking at him accusingly, and said in his characteristically flat, dazed voice: “Pervert!”

Pervert… is it? Gu Feiyi smiled.

In his heart, he was thinking: if he told Xie Changsheng that he had also discovered the boy’s inner thigh was a weakness, he wondered what words the little fool would use to scold him then.

Then again… where else on Xie Changsheng’s body were there weaknesses? Gu Feiyi’s Adam’s apple rolled twice. He was suddenly quite curious.