After My Faked Death Failed, My Ex-Wife Came Chasing After Me - Chapter 7

Who was the one who poured slops onto Lin Zheng’s bedding?

At that very moment, Lu Ting’an was crouching at the top of the stairs, peeking down and laughing so hard she couldn’t close her mouth.

It worked! By giving her such a “grand gift,” Lin Zheng would have to owe her a favor no matter what in the future. How could there be someone as clever as her in this world?

“System, how’s that? Not OOC (out of character), right? I still achieved my goal.” Lu Ting’an couldn’t help but brag to the system.

The System: [Don’t get ahead of yourself. The Sect Exams are coming up soon. Once that plotline plays out, any favorability she has for you will be completely ruined.]

Thinking of this gave Lu Ting’an a headache. In a fit of pique, she smothered her face with a pillow. “Would it kill you to let me be happy for a second? You really know how to throw a wet blanket on things.”

But putting the plot aside, when she saw the faint smile that appeared on the corner of Lin Zheng’s mouth as she held the little snake, Lu Ting’an felt a sudden, inexplicable wave of happiness. She felt she had truly done a good deed.

Lin Zheng looks so good when she smiles. It would be nice if she smiled more often.

As she thought this, an image of Lin Zheng holding her hand to teach her swordplay inexplicably flashed through her mind, and her face began to feel slightly hot again.

Strange. Have I been overthinking things lately? I keep having these messy thoughts.

Tossing and turning had taken its toll, and sleepiness finally washed over Lu Ting’an. She haphazardly tossed her outer robe onto the desk and collapsed onto the bed, falling into a deep sleep.

The next day, just after the hour of the Rabbit (5:00 AM – 7:00 AM).

“Lu Ting’an, get up.”

Through a hazy fog, Lu Ting’an felt someone calling her. However, the lazy habits she had developed over the past few days had completely destroyed the “early to bed, early to rise” routine she had mastered back when she was studying for her post-grad exams. She was so sleepy she couldn’t open her eyes, mumbling incoherently, “Don’t bother me, let me sleep a bit longer.”

To her surprise, in the next moment, she was actually lifted up in a horizontal carry. The shock chased away most of her sleepiness. She widened her eyes and cried out in alarm, “You—what are you doing?”

As if she hadn’t heard a thing, Lin Zheng carried her with steady steps to the desk and set her down, saying calmly, “Dress and wash quickly. There are morning lessons today.”

Lu Ting’an glared at her fiercely. “Don’t you know I never attend morning lessons? Why are you calling me?”

Lin Zheng sat down across from her with practiced poise, looking at her calmly. “I know. But the Sect Exams are next month. If you want to achieve a Grade B or higher, you can no longer skip class.”

At the mention of this, Lu Ting’an completely wilted. What Lin Zheng said was the truth. With the original host’s brain, never mind exorcising demons or competing in sword matches—she probably wouldn’t even be able to copy the answers correctly if they were handed to her during the written exam.

Skipping class is fun for a moment, but the exam hall is a slaughterhouse.

Lu Ting’an sighed helplessly and began to dress sluggishly. Lin Zheng placed several delicate pastries and a bowl of plain porridge in front of her, saying, “Eat something to line your stomach first. Today, Elder Luo is setting up a sparring ring.”

“Huh?!” Lu Ting’an, who was sipping porridge, suddenly looked up in shock. “Then what am I supposed to do?”

Lin Zheng looked at her with some confusion. “It is merely a friendly match between fellow disciples. They certainly won’t hurt you. Why are you panicked?”

Lu Ting’an was at a loss for words, unable to explain. She screamed inwardly in desperation: Heavens! The key issue is that I don’t know a single bit of martial arts right now! Won’t I be exposed then?

Lin Zheng, misunderstood her silence: “There is no need to worry. Elder Luo knows you have never been skilled with a sword. You should just use your whip when the time comes.”

Lu Ting’an gave a bitter laugh. What a coincidence—the current “Little Junior Sister” didn’t know how to use the Black Gold Whip either.

Seeing that the porridge in Lu Ting’an’s bowl was nearly gone, Lin Zheng glanced at the sky and said, “It is getting late. Let’s go.”

Lu Ting’an gave an extremely reluctant “Oh.”

The morning bell atop the mountain had just finished tolling as the disciples emerged in twos and threes from the Guiyi Hall to attend morning lessons. As soon as they stepped into the Lingyan Pavilion, they saw Lin Zheng sitting upright at a desk, while Lu Ting’an was reclining crookedly. This drew murmurs of amazement from the crowd: “Little Junior Sister, what wind blew you here today?”

Lu Ting’an was so sleepy she could barely keep her eyes open. She waved them off, saying impatiently to the mocking crowd, “Can’t this young lady be diligent for once?”

“You can, of course you can.” The disciples swarmed around her to sit, instinctively isolating Lin Zheng on the outside. They whispered with a smile, “Little Junior Sister, surely Lin Zheng didn’t force you to come? She didn’t return to Guiyi Hall last night—could it be she was with you?”

Speaking of this, Lu Ting’an’s mind cleared a bit. She looked at her group of “lackeys” and said sternly, “By the way, regarding the fact that Lin Zheng didn’t return last night—if anyone dares to go gossip to the Master, I’ll break their legs.”

The disciples clicked their tongues, all finding it a bit unbelievable. “Little Junior Sister, what’s wrong with you? Why are you suddenly protecting that Lin Zheng? Did she put a curse on you?”

“What a load of rubbish.” Lu Ting’an glared at them unhappily and threatened, “Anyway, you’re not allowed to speak of it. Do you hear me?”

“Fine, fine, fine, we’ll do as you say.” The disciples felt rebuffed. Just then, an Elder stepped into the pavilion, and everyone immediately scattered with a “whoosh,” quickly returning to their seats.

Lu Ting’an forced her eyelids open. The newcomer was a pot-bellied old man. His silver-white hair was loosely tied back, yet he kept a jet-black short beard. His eyes were narrowed into thin slits, and his earlobes were full and round. His face was covered in a kind smile, making him look exactly like a benevolent Maitreya Buddha.

“Greetings, Elder Cheng!” the disciples shouted in unison.

Elder Cheng nodded to them. His gaze swept over Lu Ting’an, and he looked slightly surprised. He couldn’t help but chuckle. “An’an, you’re a rare guest. Why have you graced us with your presence today?”

Lu Ting’an rubbed her nose awkwardly. “Elder Cheng, well, isn’t the Sect Exam coming up? Please stop teasing me.”

Elder Cheng threw his head back and laughed. He slammed his book heavily onto the table with a sound like a great bell. “Quite right! Next month will be your first time descending the mountain to exorcise demons, and it is also the threshold to test the results of your daily cultivation.”

He scanned the crowd, his tone turning solemn. “At that time, what you face will not be the docile, captive spirits in the hunting grounds behind the mountain, but true monsters wreaking havoc in the world! When that time comes, whether you live or die depends entirely on your own skill.”

After he finished speaking, the Lingyan Pavilion fell into a pin-drop silence. Everyone couldn’t help but break into a cold sweat.

As he spoke, Elder Cheng gave a wide wave of his sleeve. Suddenly, a scroll several yards long flew out, slithering across the desks like a spirit snake. As it landed, it snapped into neat sections, transforming into individual exam papers that stopped in front of each disciple.

Elder Cheng took three sticks of incense from his robe and carefully placed them in an incense burner. “Therefore, today’s quiz is to test whether you have been studying diligently.” As he spoke, he lit one stick, and a curl of smoke rose. “The limit is three sticks of incense. Whoever ranks at the bottom will be responsible for cleaning the Lingyan Pavilion for an entire month.”

“Ugh…” A chorus of wails erupted in the pavilion.

Elder Cheng sat firmly in his rosewood chair, stroking his beard leisurely. He said lazily, “What are you ‘ugh-ing’ about? Start writing!”

As the incense burned down inch by inch, the Lingyan Pavilion was so quiet one could hear a pin drop.

Lu Ting’an felt like she was sitting on a bed of nails, with beads of sweat the size of beans rolling down her head.

“The origins of the Great Demon that plagued Shu during the 21st year of the Taoist Gate…” How am I supposed to know that? Lu Ting’an shook her head, sighed helplessly, and skipped to the next question.

“The ancestral weapon and totem of the Wu family in Hexi…” What on earth is this? A history of cultivation families?

Lu Ting’an wanted to cry but had no tears. If she had known, she would have worked harder after transmigrating. Truly, knowledge is only missed when it’s time to use it.

There was nothing for it; she still didn’t know the answers. She kept skipping.

After skipping several in a row, Lu Ting’an was almost ready to give up. She was even wondering if there were any methods in the cultivation world to sweep floors faster than in the mortal world. Suddenly, her gaze fell on the final major question, and she froze.

The diagram depicted a Nine-Tailed Fox Demon.

Lu Ting’an stared blankly and began to read carefully. The question stated that the Nine-Tailed Fox was a descendant of the ancient Qingqiu Fox tribe—cunning by nature, skilled in seduction, and difficult to kill. It asked them to analyze how to find the weakness of a Nine-Tailed Fox and write down the method to slay them.

Lu Ting’an uncontrollably glanced toward Lin Zheng, but the latter looked as usual, still answering the questions seriously.

She felt inexplicably angry. Did Elder Cheng not know that Lin Zheng was a fox demon? This was a bit too disrespectful.

But what made her feel worst was that she actually did know the answer.

In the original book, the reason the Little Junior Sister was able to successfully plot to destroy Lin Zheng’s entire meridian system was directly related to this fatal weakness of the Nine-Tailed Fox.

After an internal struggle, Lu Ting’an finally wrote down the answer. During the process, because she didn’t know how to use a calligraphy brush, she knocked over the inkstone, making a complete mess. She was scolded by Elder Cheng and ordered to stay behind after the exam to clean the room.

Of course, with a bunch of the original host’s “lackeys” around, Lu Ting’an certainly didn’t have to do the cleaning herself. As soon as the papers were handed in, several disciples scrambled over, snatching the bucket and rag from her hands. They said eagerly, “Little Junior Sister, how could you do such dirty, exhausting work? Let us do it.”

Lu Ting’an was happy to be idle. Additionally, she had been planning to deal with these people who were always targeting Lin Zheng. She sat down cross-legged, took an apple offered by a disciple with both hands, took a bite, and asked with feigned nonchalance:

“By the way, who was the one who poured slops on Lin Zheng’s bedding before?”

“It was me, it was me!” One of the disciples, who was huffing and puffing while scrubbing the floor, crawled over. He wiped the sweat from his face and said proudly, “How about it, Little Junior Sister? Was it satisfying?”

Lu Ting’an stared at him for a long while, truly unable to remember what this “trash” was called. “You are…”

The disciple waved his hand, smiling flatteringly. “Oh, Little Junior Sister, you really are a busy person with a short memory. It’s me, Guo Jingchen, your Seventh Senior Brother.”

“Oh~” Lu Ting’an nodded meaningfully. She stretched out her legs and beckoned him over. “I’ve been sitting for so long my legs are aching. Seventh Senior Brother, come over and massage them for me.”

Guo Jingchen clearly hadn’t expected this reaction from Lu Ting’an. He was a bit puzzled, but he still happily went over to knead her legs. He hadn’t even given two squeezes when Lu Ting’an suddenly cried “Ah!” and said in feigned anger, “What are you doing? That hurts!”

Before the words had even faded, Lu Ting’an used all her strength to deliver a heavy kick right to his chest.

Unprepared, Guo Jingchen was sent tumbling backward by the kick. Amidst the gasps of the crowd, he landed headfirst—with pinpoint accuracy—into the bucket full of filthy water.

“Pfft—”

Someone was the first to laugh, and in an instant, the disciples erupted into a chorus of laughter. Guo Jingchen struggled desperately on the ground. To make matters worse, his head was stuck in the bucket. He swallowed a few gulps of dirty water, so angry he let out a howl like a dying pig.

“Bastards! Stop laughing! Come over and help me!”

Naturally, no one paid him any mind. Lu Ting’an tried her best to suppress the corners of her mouth from curling up. She pretended to be panic-stricken and said, “Oh my, Seventh Senior Brother, are you alright? Whatever you do, don’t drink that water! It’s filthy!”

The more she spoke, the harder the surrounding disciples laughed.

Lu Ting’an folded her arms across her chest triumphantly, thinking to herself that she had finally taken a bit of revenge for Lin Zheng. She was just calculating how to subtly let Lin Zheng know about this when she looked up. Her eyes met those of Lin Zheng, who had just returned after helping Elder Cheng organize the exam papers.