After My Death, I Became a Heartless Madman - Chapter 48.1

There were many ways to make Su Ziqing change the nickname she used for Shizhou, yet Bai Ruowei had chosen the most foolish one.

Her brows slightly furrowed, the emotions swirling in her light green eyes as dark and heavy as ink unnaturally deep and somber.

She was desperately restraining the obsessive urges brought on by her possessiveness. The reason she had to hold back was because Song Shizhou found it unhealthy excessive possessiveness was a shackle between them. So she had to suppress it, had to discard those maddening thoughts in her mind.

But what if she couldn’t hold back?

Thump, thump the sound echoed in her chest as her heartbeat quickened. Even though she stood right in front of Song Shizhou, the faint fragrance of night-blooming cereus seemed to evade her no matter how she tried to catch it, how desperately she longed for it, as if deliberately avoiding her presence.

The person before her looked utterly disheartened. Song Shizhou raised an eyebrow in mild confusion.

“It’s just a nickname. Such a trivial thing isn’t worth upsetting Miss Bai over.”

“No.”

Bai Ruowei frowned, gripping Shizhou’s hand first.

Song Shizhou froze for a moment, listening as she continued,

“Whether it’s ‘Zhou Zhou’ or ‘Little Boat,’ they’re all nicknames I gave you. They’re important. Even a single nickname matters.”

If the nicknames she gave were so important, then were the gifts she had received insignificant? If she could so easily forget them, why was she now fixated on something so minor?

Song Shizhou paused. “What exactly are you trying to say?”

A silent tension surged between them. Though no words were spoken, it felt as though countless phrases swirled around Bai Ruowei’s ears, leaving her momentarily flustered her carefully prepared words now lost.

Just before Song Shizhou’s disappointment could fully settle, Bai Ruowei spoke.

“I’m just, a little angry.”

Song Shizhou blinked.

“Angry?”

“Because someone else called me ‘Zhou Zhou,’ so you’re angry?”

Miss Bai nodded.

For some reason, the usually domineering Miss Bai seemed frighteningly childish in matters of love. The light in her eyes dimmed, as if she were drowning in sorrow.

She knew how immature and unfair this was even hypocritical. She had forgotten the gifts Shizhou had given her, something so important. How could she demand perfection from Shizhou in return? Miss Bai instinctively wanted to explain, but her steps faltered.

Besides, hadn’t she been the one who once held all the power in their relationship? How many times had she overlooked Song Shizhou’s feelings?

Images of the past flooded Bai Ruowei’s mind, announcing their relationship in front of subordinates without considering Shizhou’s feelings, subjecting her to suspicion and ridicule; promising to have dinner together only to stand her up, returning home to find Shizhou curled up on the couch, drowsily waiting with a small nightlight; ignoring Shizhou’s obvious distress, leaving her with nothing but self-centered words when she needed comfort the most.

She was so cruel.

Her body swayed, nearly buckling under the weight of these past mistakes. She felt horrible like the worst person in the world.

Song Shizhou instinctively steadied her.

The scent of osmanthus brushed past her nose, carrying a faint sweetness. As her hand grazed Bai Ruowei’s skin, she noticed an unusual heat

A feverish warmth.

Song Shizhou hesitated.

“There’s a place to relax and rest on the second floor, Miss Bai. Your hands got dirty from the clay, you should go wash them.”

The studio fell quiet again. The faint scent of osmanthus lingered in the air. Though Miss Bai had left decisively, her pheromones clung stubbornly to Song Shizhou’s side, refusing to dissipate.

The weather in Houhai was humid, and the spring breeze carried a lingering tenderness. Shizhou tidied up the first floor, then opened the windows. Gusts of wind rushed in as the evening sun, a deep orange, hung heavily in the dusky sky. Despite its warm hue, it inexplicably cast a stifling atmosphere.

as if something was about to break through the surface, both tantalizing and unbearable.

About half an hour later, Su Ziqing called. The girl’s voice on the other end was full of energy.

“Shizhou, I’m at the alley entrance! I brought so much stuff, but they won’t let me drive in. Come meet me!”

Shizhou threw on her jacket and stepped outside. Bathed in the orange glow of sunset, Su Ziqing had somehow procured a cart piled high with all kinds of flower baskets.

a sight both ridiculous and sincere.

Shizhou sighed.

“Why did you buy so many flowers? I told you it’s not a formal opening. Where am I supposed to put all this?”

Ziqing stuck out her tongue.

“It’s not that much! Just a few pots. If you really don’t have space, give some to the nearby shops. You’ll need good relations with them anyway.”

Her voice was sheepish, betraying a hint of guilt.

Together, they pulled the cart along Houhai’s cobblestone alley, the wheels clattering noisily. It took them a while to finally reach the studio.

Shizhou opened the door, and Ziqing, exhausted, immediately plopped onto the sofa, helping herself to a glass of water like it was her own home.

Shizhou reminded her, “There’s someone upstairs.”

Ziqing raised an eyebrow.

“Who? Don’t tell me it’s Little White Dragon?”

When Shizhou didn’t answer, Ziqing gasped in belated realization.

“No way, it really is her?! I love her! Where is she? I need her autograph!”

A hopeless admirer of beauty, Ziqing was known throughout the Inner City for being Bai Ruowei’s die-hard fan someone who would abandon all reason at the sight of Miss Bai’s ethereal face.

Shizhou chuckled.

“Go ahead, she’s upstairs. But she might not be feeling well.”

Ziqing immediately hushed.

“Then I’ll keep quiet. Don’t want to disturb her.”

Her gaze drifted back to the flowers.

“These cost me a fortune. If you don’t like the baskets, fine but at least cherish those two lilies.”

Shizhou sighed at the cart overflowing with flowers. The whole way here, passersby had eyed them suspiciously, as if they’d robbed a florist.

“Thanks for the thought. I do like them, it’s just too much.”

Hearing about Shizhou’s studio opening, Ziqing had gone all out. The cart was stacked with flower baskets and two enormous bouquets of lilies one white, the other champagne-colored.

Ziqing paused, scratching her head sheepishly.

“Shizhou! Actually, about Sister Yu’s matter last time.”

Song Shizhou asked her, “What matter?”

Su Ziqing: “It’s about Sister Yu helping you find a studio.”

“I really didn’t mean to reveal your situation on purpose. It’s just that Sister Yu was very anxious, and considering you’re sisters with a good relationship, I told her about your plan to open a studio.”

“Alright, I know you didn’t mean to.”

Song Shizhou rested her hand on the sofa armrest.

“The Song family situation is complicated far more than you think.”

“I’m grateful for your help during this time, but regarding Sister Yu, I don’t want you to trouble her on my behalf anymore.”

She spoke euphemistically, saying she didn’t want Su Ziqing to trouble Sister Yu for her, but what she really meant was that she didn’t want Su Ziqing to keep reporting to Feng Yu. Having been close friends for so many years, Su Ziqing understood perfectly.

“Actually, I thought once Sister Yu learned you wanted to work with ceramics, she’d hand over the Song family’s porcelain business to you directly. I never expected her to show no such intention at all, even going so far as to…”

Feng Yu and Shizhou’s backgrounds were no secret in the Inner City. Almost everyone in high society knew Shizhou was the real one, Feng Yu the fake.

Song Shizhou said calmly,

“Qingqing, I have no ties to the Song family anymore. Song Enterprises is the life’s work of Madam Song Lanyi and Sister Yu. Whoever they choose to give it to, and whenever, has nothing to do with me.”

Su Ziqing nodded.

“Shizhou, I didn’t mean anything by saying this. You know me, I always speak my mind. Maybe Sister Yu has her own unspoken difficulties too. Your family matters are indeed complicated, and I won’t interfere anymore.”

Song Shizhou listened quietly, then suddenly smiled.

“Of course I believe you. We’ve been friends for so long, how could I not know what you’re thinking? Since you didn’t mean anything else, let’s not talk about this again.”

Su Ziqing scratched her head, looking a little embarrassed.

“Alright, I get it. I won’t let you down like this again.”

She sat on the sofa for a while, idly scanning the room, when her eyes suddenly lit up at the sight of the pottery wheel in the center.

“Shizhou, you’ve got great equipment here! A lot of people are into handmade ceramics these days. Even beginners can use a pottery wheel there should be plenty interested in trying it out.”

Song Shizhou nodded.

“Right. Once the property deal goes through, I plan to set aside a dedicated space as a DIY workshop.”

Su Ziqing’s family was in jewelry design, so she’d always been hands-on. Plus, being close to Sun Mengchen, she’d picked up some knowledge about ceramics. She stood and walked over to the wheel.

“Shizhou, can I give it a try?”

Song Shizhou nodded.

Su Ziqing sat down.

Though Little Su usually seemed carefree, she was actually quite meticulous. The unruly clay obediently took shape under her hands, and soon a slender, delicate form emerged.

Pottery requires talent. Some can shape decent pieces on their first try, while others struggle no matter how much they practice.

“Here’s my humble attempt, Sister Mengchen, come and give me your critique. Am I still as skilled as ever, shaping it just like before?”

Su Ziqing opened WeChat, snapped a photo, and sent it to Sun Mengchen to show off.

Sun Mengchen was probably resting, as she replied with a voice message a few minutes later,

“Yes, yes, you’re still as good as ever. Just don’t let my grandfather see it, or he’ll definitely take you on as his last disciple.”

Su Ziqing burst into laughter, utterly delighted.

Noticing Song Shizhou had been silent the whole time, she scratched her head sheepishly,

“Shizhou, do you think I’m too noisy?”

Song Shizhou shook her head,

“Not at all.”

In truth, she found Su Ziqing’s personality quite endearing like a little sun, seemingly carefree and full of energy.

Su Ziqing stuck out her tongue,

“That’s good.”

“None of my friends ever complain about me being noisy. You’re the best, you don’t mind my chatter and even seek me out to talk. The others aren’t as nice.”

Song Shizhou chuckled,

“What, even a social butterfly like you gets lonely sometimes?”

Su Ziqing wiped her hands with a tissue and sprawled onto the sofa,

“Of course! Being a social butterfly is exhausting, you know.”

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