After Appearing On A Marriage Reality Show, The Top Star Cried and Says She Doesn't Want a Divorce - Chapter 43

“Goodbye.”

Yan Mengyi gave Li Tang one last, forceful hug.

She moved out without looking back even once.

Li Tang’s feet seemed rooted to the spot, unable to chase after her. She watched helplessly as Yan Mengyi’s figure stretched long in the dim yellow streetlight.

She wore an old light blue dress, its skirt swaying gently in the night breeze, and dragged an old suitcase she’d used in high school. Her only possession was a bank card holding the earnings from her self-media work.

Yan Mengyi’s gait was labored in her mid-height heels, straining to pull the suitcase.

Li Tang watched her clumsy movements, feeling a sense of unfamiliarity, as if she were in a dream.

The housekeeper, unaware of Li Tang’s reaction, glanced repeatedly at her, sensing no intention to stop the departure.

Finally, Yan Mengyi hailed a taxi, and the driver helped load her luggage.

As the door closed, all that remained visible was Yan Mengyi sitting upright in the back seat.

Then, that yellow taxi vanished into the bustling streets of Beijing.

Only then did Li Tang finally take two steps forward.

“Did she… really leave?”

Li Tang didn’t know why she had stood frozen in place earlier.

Perhaps from the beginning, she hadn’t truly believed Yan Mengyi would leave her.

Beijing was such a vast city, but without the support of money, it seemed so small, with only the most obscure corners offering refuge for a body.

Basements, subdivided five-bedroom apartments, park benches. These were the places that accommodated bodies stripped of financial backing.

Yan Mengyi was so socially anxious, so frail, so vulnerable. Could she withstand the clamor and jostling of the outside world?

Had she ever seen the sun at six in the morning? Ridden the crowded Line 5 subway? Gripped the handrail in a car reeking of sweat and fermentation?

She had never experienced any of it.

In that moment, Li Tang realized was this a kind of contempt she held for Yan Mengyi?

She had thought this little butterfly had long been tamed, never imagining the butterfly would still fly away.

******

Yan Mengyi didn’t go to see Song Yujing.

Although Song Yujing owned property and lived alone in an empty house, Yan Mengyi didn’t want to bother her Senior Sister.

Instead, she walked into a real estate agency on the street, quickly viewed an apartment, and signed a one-year lease.

It wasn’t that she was particularly good at making decisions; her bank balance left her with little choice.

After buying toiletries at a small convenience store, Yan Mengyi took a shower and finally settled in, at least for the moment.

Lying on the creaking bed, surrounded by the unpleasant smell of the apartment, her mind echoed with memories of the dirty and uncomfortable bathroom.

Yan Mengyi kept telling herself she had to get used to this.

The phone on the bedside table rang.

Her heart skipped a beat as she picked it up.

It was Li Tang, who rarely ever texted her.

The message was simple and emotionless: “Even if we’re splitting up, the apartment is yours. It’s time for me to leave.”

Yan Mengyi stared at the screen, a bitter taste rising in her mouth. She didn’t reply. Her silence weighed heavier than any words.

Due to the overwhelmingly positive response to the pilot episode, the full series was rushed into release, debuting precisely at 8 PM on Thursday.

No matter which app Yan Mengyi opened, she saw people discussing Pillowside Lovers. She tossed her phone aside and buried her face in her pillow.

But in the silence, she heard the lonely beat of her own heart.

Once, scientists discovered a killer whale whose vocalizations differed from those of its kind, leaving it perpetually isolated.

“Do you miss me too?”

Yan Mengyi sat by the window, the night outside dark as ink. The lamplight illuminated her pale face, her eyes hollow, as if her soul had fled.

But then she couldn’t help but imagine Li Tang and Hua Jingyan on the phone.

Why can she talk to Hua Jingyan for so long?

Why are there only a few words for me?

By 11 PM, her roommates returned one by one.

They slammed the security door shut, then began speaking loudly in their native dialect.

The walls in their shared apartment were merely partitions, not solid, so every sound from outside echoed clearly through the thin barriers.

They discussed the content of Pillowside Lovers, Li Tang’s performance on the show, her cooking skills, and every detail of her marriage.

Just a wall away, Yan Mengyi listened quietly. She could feel the wind and time passing through her, flowing past, but she couldn’t do anything.

Yan Mengyi’s bitterness was like a cup of unsweetened coffee, something she couldn’t explain and didn’t want to explain.

She simply sat quietly by the window, waiting for a certain figure to appear. She began to daydream, imagining Li Tang arriving at her door with flowers, just as she had always hoped.

Her anticipation grew so intense that she started drawing back the curtains, hoping Li Tang might somehow find her trace. She craned her neck to look, but of course, all she found was disappointment.

She burst into tears, hating her own weakness. She muttered to herself over and over, “This is just an emotional reaction. It will all pass.”

Memories replayed in Yan Mengyi’s mind like an old film.

They had been classmates, friends, lovers. Those hazy days, those carefree times, now seemed impossibly distant.

Perhaps, from the very beginning, it had all been a mistake.

Perhaps we were never meant to be together, but I desperately wanted to walk with you.

It was all so muddled.

But Li Tang was clear-headed.

After that day, Li Tang received a call saying she needed to return home urgently.

The two didn’t communicate for an entire day.

Yan Mengyi’s mind was consumed by those scenes, leaving her in a daze.

Finally, she couldn’t resist asking:

“What is our relationship now?”

Yan Mengyi braced herself for tears.

Everyone makes mistakes in life.

If Li Tang had said “friends,” Yan Mengyi would have turned and left, thinking it would be easy to walk away.

But she said, “We should be considered girlfriend and boyfriend.”

Yan Mengyi was overjoyed. She had a girlfriend! Was she actually in a relationship?

But in the week after confirming their relationship, Li Tang seemed very busy and rarely texted her.

With each sparse message, Yan Mengyi’s heart sank deeper into the silence.

She met with Li Tang again and asked the same question. Li Tang’s answer was the same, but Yan Mengyi’s heart could no longer find peace.

“Didn’t you ask already?” Li Tang’s voice was calm, but Yan Mengyi’s heart churned with turmoil.

“I could tell you weren’t keen on the idea, so I wanted to ask again.”

“Let’s go get the license,” Li Tang said, her words detonating like a bomb in Yan Mengyi’s heart.

Now, as Yan Mengyi replayed the scene over and over in her mind, she began to suspect that Li Tang didn’t love her at all, only needed her. She began to wonder if her own feelings for Li Tang were nothing more than mere dependence.

She started defining their relationship using psychological terms: NPD (narcissistic personality disorder), BPD (borderline personality disorder). These cold, clinical labels became shackles in her heart.

******

“Did you see today’s show?” Wan Cuirong asked Li Tang.

Li Tang seemed to be sitting at the piano. The occasional sound of keys tinkling came through the phone, but they weren’t part of any melody. Li Tang wasn’t even fond of playing the piano.

“The netizens’ reviews of you and Xiao Yi are really positive,” Wan Cuirong said. “To be honest, I was worried you’d be too aloof. I didn’t expect you to learn so much for her sake. It’s a relief. But what surprised me even more was Xiao Yi’s popularity. She’s just an ordinary person, but fans created a dedicated forum for her—not because of her marriage status, but because she’s so unexpected. Did you know how many people are trying to replicate the hairpins she makes? But so far, no one online has succeeded!”

Li Tang sighed. It wasn’t as if Yan Mengyi, having been a full-time homemaker for years, lacked the ability to survive on her own.

Probing her own heart, Li Tang realized she too couldn’t withstand such scrutiny.

Hadn’t Li Tang tacitly encouraged Yan Mengyi to stay home for seven years?

She knew how exceptional Yan Mengyi was, how dazzlingly brilliant she was.

Perhaps she tacitly allowed this pearl to be buried in the dust, perhaps she even hoped for such a thing to happen.

Only then could she keep Yan Mengyi.

Wan Cuirong finally sensed something was wrong. “Is something wrong at home?”

“No.”

“Have Xiao Yi answer the phone.”

Silence.

Li Tang’s reaction was strangely perfunctory. Her eyes were vacant, her mind seemed to have left this world.

Even when she absentmindedly played a discordant melody, she showed no concern.

“I’ll be there right away.”

With those words, Wan Cuirong hung up the phone. Without hesitation, she immediately drove over.

Walking into Li Tang’s home, she didn’t smell the familiar scent of incense. Everything had changed, becoming unfamiliar and cold.

This home had lost its mistress.

Li Tang sat in the music room, her fingers weakly plucking at the piano keys. Her gaze was empty and distant.

She wore a wrinkled white blouse, its collar slightly open, revealing the line of her collarbone. It was a melancholy, desolate beauty.

“Where’s your wife?” A trace of anger crept into Wan Cuirong’s voice.

Li Tang didn’t answer. She just sat there quietly, like a statue, lifeless and emotionless.

“Your wife ran away? It’s all your fault. You know what she cares about, yet you deliberately upset her. Go after her. Are you too proud to do that?”

Wan Cuirong’s words cut Li Tang’s heart like a sharp knife.

“She doesn’t want to see me.”

Li Tang’s voice was low and weak, her eyes even emptier than before.

Li Tang began to remember, recalling every little moment, their laughter, their arguments, their love, their hatred.

Her fingers unconsciously sped up on the strings, producing a chaotic flurry of notes.

She would never forget the clumsiness of their first encounter. During that stressful time, when her stepmother was forcing her to sign away everything, Yan Mengyi’s presence had given her infinite strength.

She had been afraid Yan Mengyi would dislike her, so when Yan Mengyi asked about their relationship, she had answered, “We’re sort of girlfriend and boyfriend.”

If Yan Mengyi had rejected her, they could have still fallen back on being friends.

Right?

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