After a Fake Death, the Emotionless Dao Senior Sister Became Obsessed - Chapter 60

Si Jing plunged into a confused and chaotic dream.

She watched herself meet, get to know, and finally naturally bond and perform the marriage rites with a lively and charming little fish.

She was never one who cultivated the Dao of Ruthlessness. Her fingertips touched her chest, where a heartbeat no different from an ordinary person’s pulsed, no longer having lost her past.

The little fish, dressed in magnificent silk wedding attire, nestled against her chest, her body soft and warm.

First, she sweetly called out, “Zhi Zhi,” and then unexpectedly leaned in, innocently pecking her lips.

She took Si Jing’s hand and guided it all the way to her own soft chest, tilting her head, “Why is it going thump-thump, thump-thump here?”

Si Jing naturally knew the reason.

She was also a little shy, and softly replied, “Because, Zhaozhao and I are married.”

Just like her at this moment, face warm and heart burning, all manner of joy seemed about to spill out from her chest.

But when she reached out to touch the little fish, she only felt a cold and sticky sensation.

The wedding feast and the scene of marriage shattered like a bubble.

The girl’s face was bloodless, lying on her lap amidst the cold, desolate mountain wind, a bloody hole ripped open in her chest.

With the demon core gouged out, how could there be a throbbing sound in her chest?

Clear tears fell, staining the little fish’s chest with a patch of blood.

Why, after she had gained a heart, was Zhaozhao no longer willing to wait for her?

Si Jing sat up in a panic, her chest heavy and aching.

Her vision was still completely dark. Her fingers trembled as she lifted a hand to cover the cloth blindfold, which was already soaked with bloody tears.

This… would scare the little fish.

Si Jing hurriedly untied it, enduring the pain to summon a surge of water vapor to wash it clean. She accidentally touched the soft straw mat beneath her, which was still warm, and a satisfied smile spread on her lips.

She reached out towards the direction where she remembered the girl sleeping soundly last night, and gently called, “Bei Yue?”

There was no response, and the sensation of what she touched was cold.

Had her Zhaozhao gone out to forage again?

Si Jing held the cushion the girl had slept on last night, patiently waiting for her little fish dragon to return.

During this time, she fumbled around and found the roasted mealworms she had painstakingly prepared last night, which were completely untouched, and a small plate of plum blossom pastries.

Zhaozhao might be a picky eater.

If she preferred mushrooms, why not go out and gather some herself before she returned?

Si Jing embraced her sword. The hilt, however, accidentally snagged on something.

Cold jade stones lightly knocked together, making a crisp sound. It was the ice bracelet and the ice ring she had forged with spiritual power last night.

The little fish had left without wearing them.

Si Jing held the cold objects in her palm, pressing them close to her chest. She thought, they are indeed a bit chilling. Zhaozhao is sensitive to cold, so she probably doesn’t like them very much.

What about warm jade? If it were carved into the shape of a little fish, would the girl like it?

She smiled tenderly, imagining Chu Zhao’s expression when she received the gift. Her thoughts drifted far away, and she couldn’t help but speculate.

The little fish left so early today. After leaving the stone cave, would she specifically go looking for the gold thread grass flower jade ring that she lost yesterday?

It wasn’t anything good, crude and formed from demonic energy.

But if Zhaozhao truly held her gift in her heart… how wonderful that would be.

Si Jing rekindled the fire. Like yesterday, she slowly fumbled around, tidying up the stone cave to be neat and cozy.

She bent down and picked up the dagger that had been dropped sometime.

It was the one Chu Zhao had given her at the deserted mountain cave-dwelling. She hadn’t known that the tail scale held so much affection from the little fish.

Zhaozhao wanted to spend the rest of her life with her.

Si Jing’s smile was tender and lingering, and she carefully hid the dagger in her sleeve, cherishing it immensely.

But the curve of her lips gradually dropped.

She remembered another time when this dagger had uncontrollably fallen out.

It was on Verdant Peak, the day she bid farewell to Chu Zhao.

Si Jing had almost never thought about personally killing the little fish.

When she was afflicted by the demonic energy in the Cloud Water Realm, she had never associated it with Chu Zhao.

Or perhaps, she had always regarded the rumor of the Demon Venerable Jiang Yun’s reincarnation as a ridiculously deceitful lie.

When the little fish curled up in her palm, she was always soft and harmless, never having hurt anyone. Even when angry, she would only cast an illusion to turn someone’s hands into crab claws.

She had also asked her innocently, “Zhi Zhi, is A-Chu a good demon?”

Of course, she was.

But at that time, she remained silent, lightly shifting her gaze.

Si Jing disliked her original self, who was so indifferent that she had lost all humanity. The extent to which she craved Chu Zhao’s pulsing, warm heart was the extent to which she loathed herself.

But it seemed fate had played a cruel joke on her alone.

It told her that if she wanted a heart, she must trade it for another.

And so, the blood-stained dagger dropped. The little fish was lifeless, no longer able to open her eyes to look at her, and she immediately became a demon, only then gaining the seven emotions and six desires.

Si Jing didn’t understand.

She didn’t understand why that day, while she was just mourning a fellow disciple in front of her Uncle-Master Huai Ning, her thoughts had occasionally drifted far away.

Thinking about the deserted mountain, thinking about the extremely disappointed look Chu Zhao had cast her way.

When she opened her eyes again, the little fish she had yearned for day and night was lying lifeless in her arms?

The girl’s life force slowly draining away, her empty, bewildered eyes overlapping with the memory, nearly drove Si Jing to madness.

Was it because her nature was inherently evil, and she was being punished by the heavens?

Or… someone else.

…Was it Luo Yu, who cast the Soul Severing technique on the dagger?

Si Jing leaned against a corner of the stone cave, drained of strength.

However, she had no way to refute it.

In the end, what remained in her mind was still the image of her own hands plunging the dagger into the girl’s chest.

The rain had stopped. Her arms were empty, as if all the joy of something lost and regained was nothing but a false and fleeting illusion of the past few days.

The little fish still hadn’t returned.

Si Jing roasted the completely cold mealworms over and over, sensing the sunlight seeping into the stone cave gradually shift from faint warmth to a comfortable heat, before finally sinking into cold silence.

Just like yesterday, waiting in the stone cave from dawn until dusk.

She lightly pursed her lips, clinging to a sliver of hope, thinking, Zhaozhao’s pace is just like this.

If she waited a few more moments, she would be able to catch the sight of the figure she longed for at the cave entrance.

The girl would be holding a skirt-full of mushrooms, and apologetically ask her in a soft voice if she was hungry.

She would still be the frail sword cultivator, Jing Si, and she wouldn’t mind the silly dragon dangling on Zhaozhao’s forearm.

That dragon… she’d find a chance to kill it later.

Si Jing held her sword and walked to the cave entrance to wait. The wind lifted the snowy cloth covering her eyes, and her figure was thin. Beneath the cloth, her eyes were hollow, and a hint of crimson habitually stained the corners of her eyes.

She lifted her chin, wanting to look at tonight’s moonlight, but belatedly realized that she had been blind for a long time.

She couldn’t even catch a glimpse of Zhaozhao’s current appearance.

She could only rely on physical contact to perceive the rise and fall of the girl’s body, and in her dreams, use the illusory phantoms she conjured to repeatedly sketch the little fish’s appearance in her mind.

The girl’s soft palm, her slender waist, and those pink jade eyes had appeared countless times before Si Jing in her dreams last night.

She felt as if by embracing the person sleeping soundly in her arms, she had filled all the emptiness and loss of her past.

But the little fish had quietly slipped away when she awoke, and still hadn’t returned.

Had Zhaozhao gotten lost?

Or, had she encountered a troublesome demon?

Si Jing’s face was pale, and an unprecedented fear suddenly arose in her heart.

She remembered that Zhaozhao valued beauty the most.

Would she despise her for being blind, severely injured, and frail, and abandon her?

Borrowing the demonic energy detected by her Sea of Consciousness, Si Jing used her sword to probe the way, stumbling as she left the dwelling.

It was raining outside again at night. Just like last night, her entire body, including her hair, quickly became soaked, resembling a snowy, beautiful ghost in the rain.

Forcing herself to remain calm, she took out the dagger from her sleeve and slowly, skillfully carved the shape of a little fish onto her forearm.

Drip, drop.

The falling drops of blood gradually condensed into several terrifying blood demons, feeding on her blood-red energy saturated with demonic power, letting out satisfied, low hisses.

Si Jing curved her lips, as if possessed, frantically carving more.

She thought, the more she drew, perhaps the little fish would be able to sense her affection?

From the moment she fell into the Silent Sea, amidst the chaotic turbulence, she was always thinking of Chu Zhao.

Initially, she would masturbate while calling out “Zhaozhao.” Later, when she could no longer feel the bone-deep pleasure, she tried to keep the little fish on her body.

Every time she outlined a little fish with the dagger, it was as if the girl was embracing her neck, softly calling her “Zhi Zhi.”

Some phantoms would shed tears of pity, sweetly asking her if it hurt. Other phantoms would look at her with disappointment, saying the pain was not even one-tenth of having her demon core gouged out.

Si Jing carved more, drinking the poison as if it were sweet nectar.

The pain gradually became numb. She feigned a weak appearance and asked with hope, “Zhaozhao, I—I know exactly how much the Soul Severing technique hurts now.”

“…Could you come back and see me, alright?”

Finally, the little fish was willing to return to her side.

She personally bandaged her wounds, and last night, she even docilely curled up in her arms and slept with her.

And now, Zhaozhao was merely lost.

Si Jing had lost too much blood, her steps were unsteady. She indifferently killed the blood demons greedily climbing onto her forearm, and deep demonic energy permeated her surroundings.

“Find Zhaozhao for me like you did last night, understood?” she whispered, parting her lips.

The demons dared not disobey and scattered in fear.

If she set another trap like last night, and she… suffered even more severe injuries, would the little fish take pity on her again?

“Zhao…” Si Jing’s voice slightly paused, then she used a wet voice, calling out in panic, “Bei Yue.”

As if self-torturing, she mobilized the Xuanmen Sword Art. A metallic sweetness quickly churned in her throat, and fresh blood uncontrollably spilled out.

Si Jing lowered her face, weakly lifting her lips.

She knew that Zhaozhao liked her appearance of pure, snowy grace. Then she would be a good actor, portraying a sword cultivator of impeccable integrity.

The sound of the rain trickled in her ears. She had walked very far, so far that she could barely make out the flickering firelight in the stone cave behind her. She was cold all over.

For a moment, it felt as though she had returned to the bone-chilling, corrosive blood water of the Silent Sea.

But she still hadn’t found that figure.

Just like she had found the wandering souls of her sixteen fellow disciples in what the world recognized as the Devil’s Den, and even properly recovered the souls of the demons on the deserted mountain.

She wanted to please the girl on some future day.

But the little fish she most wanted to keep confined, despite her exhausting all efforts, still broke free from her grasp.

Si Jing collapsed to her knees, exhausted.

The red silk tied around her left palm was now damp and heavy. She pressed it against the side of her face, warming it up little by little.

She whispered, “…Zhaozhao.”

It seemed as though she heard auditory hallucinations again. She vaguely reached out her hand to search.

Instead of being held by the girl’s soft palm as she had wished, she only touched a cold jade ring shaped like a gold thread grass flower.

Zhaozhao had discarded the gift she gave her, crushing it into the dust.

That’s why she didn’t wear it back last night.

All her ridiculous pretenses, her painstakingly calculated prying, and the affection she suppressed to the point where it was almost unspeakable, were worthless in Chu Zhao’s eyes.

Si Jing braced her hands on the ground, gradually clenching her fingers. The jade ring cut her palm, and crimson blood spilled out.

The little fish no longer liked her.

So… she heartlessly abandoned her.

The rain poured down, soaking her robes completely. Her hair clung to the pale side of her cheek. Beneath the snowy cloth covering her eyes, her gaze was filled with crimson desire. She gave a desolate smile.

But she clearly still couldn’t forget Zhaozhao.

Zhaozhao, Zhaozhao.

How could Zhaozhao just run out of her palm like this?

Si Jing knelt in the heavy rain, untied the red silk wrapped around her palm, and fumbled to fold it into the shape of the lively little fish from her memory.

She first held it lightly, then gradually closed her palm until not a single drop of the wet rain could penetrate.

“Zhaozhao…” Her lips were a seductive, blood-red color as she softly murmured, like a wet wisp of a soul in the rain.

“You must forever, forever stay well in Yingzhi’s palm.”

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