A Change of Husband - Chapter 100

“Honestly… I thought it was a dream.”

 

Maybe it was because they didn’t want to waste even a moment looking away from each other. Even after Esperad entered the bedroom, the two of them remained silent for a long time, simply gazing at one another.

 

It was Asilie who finally broke the silence.

 

“It was such a miracle. I thought I’d already used up all the luck in my life with the miracles I’ve experienced so far. Just meeting you… that alone was something I could never trade for anything else.”

 

“……”

 

“I thought it was already more than I deserved, just having memories of you. But you… you, so kindly…”

 

She tried to speak calmly, without crying.

 

“You came to find me…”

 

But that proved impossible.

 

Asilie bit her lip hard, feeling her voice tremble again, and her sorrow deepen with it.

 

She tried to hold back, but maybe from the moment she saw Esperad again, all her self-control had vanished.

 

“Thank you.”

 

“I’m the one who should thank you…”

 

When he heard the news that Asilie had died.
When he was told she was still another man’s wife, and that she loved that man.
When he thought she no longer remembered him.

 

Asilie was always Asilie—but even though he knew none of that could affect his love for her, sometimes waves of sorrow still overwhelmed him.

 

But when he realized that the two of them had been looking toward the same place from the very beginning, all of that sorrow seemed to be rewarded.

 

“Thank you for being there. What I feared most… was finding you gone from the place I believed you would be.”

 

“You didn’t spend too much time being lonely, did you? Because of me?”

 

“Sometimes, yes, I was lonely. Accepting the fact that you weren’t where you were supposed to be… that was too hard.”

 

“Hic… I—I’m sorry…”

 

“But what frightened me most… was that your face, your smile, the memories we shared… they started to fade in my mind. Every time I struggled to remember our conversations and the emotions we shared, I was terrified I would lose you completely…”

 

Only after hearing his low, trembling voice did Asilie realize Esperad was crying too—just like her.

 

“That was what scared me most. Everything else was fine. I believed that one day… even in death… I would see you again.”

 

“I left you alone for so long… hic… I’m so sorry. I’m truly sorry…”

 

“Just being able to see you again… that alone fills me with gratitude. So please, don’t say things like that, Asilie.”

 

“Ah…”

 

Asilie couldn’t help but run into his arms.

 

Did this man know? How desperately she had wished, over and over again…

 

Just once—if only once—she wanted to hear that gentle voice call her name again.

 

It was a simple sound, only the movement of his lips, but even so, that sound, that ordinary name, reminded her deeply that this man was still hers.

 

“…I missed you.”

 

“I did too.”

 

“I really, really missed you.”

 

He must have lived a far longer life than her.

 

He must have sat on the throne of Astel and ruled, experienced things she couldn’t even imagine, seen so much more, learned so much more—alone.

 

And yet, not even a little of his love for her had faded. Not for a single moment had he forgotten her.

 

The weight of that immense love overwhelmed her. She didn’t even know if she had the right to accept it—and so her tears kept falling.

 

“Asilie.”

 

“Yes.”

 

Tears sprang up again at the sound of her name.

 

She tried to answer naturally, but her voice was already soaked in emotion.

 

“…I will never let you go again. And I will never be apart from you. Even if you get tired of me someday, even if you say you want to run away…”

 

Asilie reached up, cradled his head in both hands, and pulled him in for a kiss.

 

No more words were needed. She, too, didn’t want to let him go, didn’t want to part from him—and even if he got tired of her, she had no intention of letting go.

 

The meaning she had finally regained in life, her one reason to keep living in this cruel world—

 

That was why Asilie could never give him up.

 

“I love you, Esperad.”

 

That confession came as she lifted her head after the long kiss. She hadn’t meant to say it aloud, but it slipped from her lips—her most sincere truth.

 

Esperad gently kissed her lips again and whispered above them,

 

“I love you, Asilie.”

 

At the tingling sensation, Esperad stepped back slightly, trying to distance himself.

 

He had always wanted her, but he didn’t want to pressure the woman he loved—especially after she’d been unconscious for days from the shock.

 

But when he felt her small hand gripping his collar, the resolve he had barely managed to keep started to shake again.

 

“Asilie?”

 

“Hold me.”

 

Just those few words—so small a request—were enough to capture his full attention.

 

Asilie knew better than anyone what she was doing to him. She gently brushed his cheek with her hand and whispered again, softly.

 

“So I can feel that I’m still your woman… hold me like that, Esperad.”

 

She was the lover he had reunited with after so long.

 

And she was also the only woman who had ever fully belonged to him.

 

He had been afraid of hurting her, so he’d hesitated to even touch her. But now that she was the one asking—he couldn’t step back. No, he didn’t want to.

 

Esperad pressed his lips to hers again, lifted her into his arms, and headed toward the bed.

 

It had been so long since he had kissed and made love to her on that bed—so long that he could barely remember it.

 

And after marrying Asilie, it had become routine for them to fall asleep together, so her absence only made the emptiness of the bed feel even greater.

 

The way she used to snuggle up to his warmth, the laugh that sounded like a song whenever she teased him, the beautiful amber eyes that looked up at him with tears…

 

Those memories of her had come to him naturally, making his nights feel even longer and lonelier.

 

But not anymore. Now, his lover was fully in his arms again.

 

The way she clung to him, wrapping her arms around his neck—that delicate, desperate gesture reminded him again.

 

“E-Esperad…”

 

Every time she called his name, the delicate skin on the back of her neck trembled, her face flushed red, her dazed eyes looked at him with that same sweet expression, and her body responded to each of his kisses and touches.

 

“Ah… I really can’t anymore…”

 

Unable to hold back, Esperad kissed her pale, slender neck and moved downward.

 

Thump, thump, thump.

 

Her heartbeat rang loudly in his ears.

 

Each time he unbuttoned his shirt, her fingers brushed his skin—each touch felt like it was setting him on fire.

 

His nerves, sensitive to even such a small gesture, screamed one thing clearly—

 

That Asilie was the only one who could make him feel this way.

 

“I missed you.”

 

Her voice was soaked with emotion.

 

Asilie realized she wasn’t crying from guilt anymore—she was crying because she was happy to be able to share this moment with him.

 

“I missed everything—so, so much. I thought I’d never see it again. Never again…”

 

She didn’t want to cry while making love. That would be pathetic.

 

She fought to hold back the tears welling up in her throat and raised her hand to gently stroke his soft lips. They were moist, and warm.

 

Esperad’s hand brushed through her hair, as if to comfort her.

 

Her soft hair slipped through his fingers, and soon he kissed her again.

 

Every kiss, every touch, every motion that explored her deeply brought back their past.

 

Even though she knew in her mind she had him back, whenever he touched her the way he used to, Asilie would flinch in surprise.

 

It was hard to tell—was it the miracle of their reunion that shocked her? Or the provocative sensations he gave her?

 

His hot hands sweeping across her soft skin, his persistent touch—it all made her body tremble uncontrollably.

 

“Ahh…”

 

“Shh, it’s okay.”

 

As she intermittently moaned, Asilie tightly held his firm and warm body. Slowly, the two of them became completely one.

 

“Ugh…”

 

“Ah, Asilie.”

 

With Esperad’s gentle yet rough movements, Asilie clung to him, letting out screams of pleasure. Only he, the one who could make her feel such fullness, could do so for her. And to him, she was the only one.

 

This wasn’t just a simple physical pleasure; it was a true exchange of hearts that made this sensation possible.

 

Asilie thought she could die like this. With him, by his side.

 

“I love you…”

 

That one confession was enough. Asilie felt a bliss so intense it nearly turned her mind blank, and she held his body even tighter.

 

 

“I… I don’t know if it’s right for His Majesty the King to be doing this,” Asilie said, looking uncertain.

 

“Ah.”

 

Though she tried to resist weakly, Esperad was determined. When Asilie finally reluctantly opened her mouth, he smiled in satisfaction and offered her a piece of bread, generously spread with butter and raspberry jam.

 

“If I keep eating like this every day, I’ll gain weight.”

 

“You’d still be beautiful.”

 

“People will criticize me for not taking care of my figure.”

 

“You don’t need to care about what people with decorative eyes say, Asilie.”

 

She couldn’t argue with him, but it wasn’t bad. Not at all.

 

Trying to suppress the smile that kept creeping up on her lips, she accepted the bread he offered and soon stiffened at a thought that came to mind.

 

She realized she had completely forgotten something.

 

“Esperad… Actually… there’s something I want to ask.”

 

“Anything, please.”

 

“I heard that you might marry the late queen.”

 

At Asilie’s words, Esperad, who had been busy spreading jam on his bread, finally looked up.

 

He wasn’t sure where to begin, but after a moment, he gathered his thoughts and spoke.

 

“I have no intention of marrying her. I just chose a faster and simpler way to handle things all at once.”

 

“I see.”

 

“The late queen has had long-standing ties with conservative aristocrats, so she knows a lot about them. She’ll try to cut ties with them for our marriage, but the conservatives won’t let her do that.”

 

“What are you planning to do about her?”

 

“The late queen wants to stay in Astel. However, I can never allow someone like her to live as one of my country’s citizens. And Asilie, if her very existence makes you uncomfortable, I will find another way. It won’t be difficult.”

 

Asilie appreciated his words, but she shook her head. There was no need to complicate things just because of discomfort.

 

Moreover, Esperad still had a lot to do. He wasn’t just dealing with hostile aristocrats; he was a ruler of this country. She couldn’t allow him to waste energy on unnecessary actions.

 

“I’m fine, Esperad. I trust you. But…”

 

Asilie suddenly became curious.

 

“How did you know that I remember everything? We’ve met and talked before, but we didn’t recognize each other.”

 

“That’s…”

 

Despite desperately searching, Esperad couldn’t find Jonathan’s whereabouts. But Asilie had used a pistol, which hadn’t yet been distributed in Astel, to protect him.

 

He had suspected something for a while, but it was then that he was certain.

 

“It’s because of the pistol. That weapon started being distributed to Astel ten years after your death. I realized then that you were with Jonathan. And if you were with Jonathan, I thought it was likely that you still had your memories.”

 

“Ah, now that you mention it, don’t you need Jonathan?”

 

“Looking at the situation now, it seems there’s no problem with the weapons merchants making and distributing guns without Jonathan. I could make weapons that won’t be produced for years through Jonathan, but that’s not necessary right now.”

 

“I see. Then, should I continue to keep Jonathan safe at the Grandier Duke’s house?”

 

“It would actually be safer there than at the Medici Mansion.”

 

After hearing Esperad’s words, Asilie hesitated before cautiously speaking.

 

“…Then, what about me?”

 

Her short question was enough for Esperad to immediately understand her concern. He knew exactly what she was worried about.

 

Asilie’s official status was the daughter of the Grandier Duke, who had returned after a divorce. However, in conservative Astel, divorced noblewomen were often looked down upon and treated badly.

 

What Asilie was really asking was whether she and Esperad, the king of this country, could be together despite the way others would see her.

 

“You should stay at the Grandier Duke’s house.”

 

Esperad’s answer was completely reasonable, especially from the perspective of a king ruling over the country. However, perhaps Asilie had hoped for something else, as she hesitated, unsure of how to respond.

 

At that moment, Esperad kissed her forehead and finished the words she had left unsaid.

 

“Until I formally propose and bring you to the palace, stay safe.”