You’d Better Break the Engagement Soon - Chapter 3

Shi Zhi was awakened by the sounds coming from the bathroom.

The lights in the room were off, leaving only a faint, hazy glow filtering through the gaps in the curtains. After a series of rustling noises, the sound of pitter-pattering water soon followed.

Someone was taking a shower.

Shi Zhi was only dazed for a moment before his memories came rushing back. Entwining, colliding, trembling, panting. Untiring and insatiable.

He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and slowly exhaled. Then, supporting his aching, limp body, he sat up and began slowly looking for clothes to wear.

Fortunately, his pants had been taken off early the night before and hadn’t been stained much, so they were still wearable. His T-shirt was a bit wrinkled but manageable. It was the hoodie that was the problem…

Shi Zhi frowned as he looked at it; it was covered in fading pigments and other unknown substances. When he had lacked the strength to move, he simply had to endure it, but now that he could choose, he turned his gaze away in disgust.

He had to leave. That was Shi Zhi’s only thought right now.

They were both adults; they had been clear-headed yet swayed by desire. Shi Zhi didn’t feel regret or shame; he simply didn’t know how they were supposed to interact from here on out. They were strangers who had met by chance; perhaps the other person didn’t want any further involvement either. Leaving now was a form of consideration for both parties, not an act of irresponsibility or evasion.

Yes, exactly. He was simply making the most considerate choice. Shi Zhi convinced himself of this.

He endured the awkwardness and walked to the window, discovering it was raining outside. The sky was gloomy, looking very cold. Shi Zhi shuddered and looked around. Hanging by the entrance was a dark gray trench coat; he remembered the man hanging it there just after they had walked in.

Shi Zhi rubbed his fingers together, biting his lip in hesitation. In the end, choosing between a hotel bathrobe and the trench coat, he picked the coat.

He placed the 800 yuan in cash which he hadn’t managed to give away the night before—on the nightstand next to the man’s phone. Taking the trench coat, he left with quiet, light steps.

March in An City was a time when the warmth of spring still battled a lingering chill. The alternating rain and snow left the streets filled with a damp, sticky atmosphere. Shi Zhi hailed a taxi while wrapped in the trench coat, returning home enveloped in a scent that was both foreign and familiar.

The first thing he did upon arriving home was take a shower.

Shi Zhi stood in the steaming shower, looking at himself in the mirror. Because he was a shut-in who rarely engaged in outdoor activities, his skin was much whiter than most men’s. Currently, it was covered in spots and marks that looked quite startling.

Shi Zhi leaned over and lightly touched a bruise on his knee. Images of the encounter in the bathroom flashed through his mind. At the time, he had been kneeling against the edge of the bathtub with the man behind him. Initially, his eyes had been blindfolded with a tie, but as his body swayed, the tie had slipped down to his neck. By the end, the tie had been gripped tight, and he had reached a peak he had never experienced before amidst the sensation of near-suffocation.

The marks on his neck would likely take a long time to fade, Shi Zhi thought.

He filled the bathtub with water, submerged himself, and closed his eyes. Whether it was the effect of the drug, the drive of desire, or simply a mutual physical attraction, Shi Zhi didn’t care. He only knew that he had been pleased, he had been satisfied, he had been clear-headed, and he had been lost in it.

If sex and love truly could be separated, then it seemed Xu Yining could be forgiven…

Vibrate, vibrate, vibrate—

Just as Shi Zhi was about to drift off, the phone on the vanity vibrated manically. Shi Zhi stepped out of the tub, wiped the water from his hands, and picked up the phone. Seeing the caller, he answered, “Hello, Yumeng.”

He hadn’t spoken since his return, and only now that he opened his mouth did he realize his throat was dry and itchy—it was incredibly uncomfortable. He had cried out too much last night.

“Little A-Zhi, what’s wrong with your voice?” Fu Yumeng asked worriedly over the phone. “Do you have a cold? Have you taken any medicine? Are you home alone? Do you want me to come over and see you?”

“I’m fine,” Shi Zhi said with a light cough.

“Really? Don’t just hide it if something’s wrong.”

Shi Zhi: “I’m really fine. Is there a reason you called?”

“Oh, right!” Fu Yumeng was quickly diverted. “That coffee brand you were talking about is back in stock. I sent you a message, but you didn’t reply. Do you want to come to the shop to pick it up, or should I drop it off at your house?”

Shi Zhi thought for a moment and said, “I’ll go to the shop. I want some cake.”

“Sure, I’ll bake it for you personally,” Fu Yumeng said. “When are you coming over?”

“Later. I’m going to sleep first.”

Fu Yumeng was long used to Shi Zhi’s “underworld” schedule of sleeping during the day and drawing at night, but she still couldn’t help but nag: “You pulled another all-nighter, didn’t you! You can’t keep doing this; turning day and night upside down—your body won’t be able to take it. If you really can’t finish that draft, just cancel the commission. At worst, you’ll pay a penalty; it’s not like we can’t afford it. Xu Yining is really something, too, only ever adding to your trouble!”

“I’m almost finished, it’s fine,” Shi Zhi said. “Go ahead and get busy. See you later.”

After hanging up, Shi Zhi opened WeChat. As expected, there were many messages. He first replied to Fu Yumeng with his arrival time, then scrolled down, stopping at an avatar featuring a watercolor sky.

Xu Yining had sent a message at 7:00 AM: [Wife, we’ve headed to Ning City. We’ll be back the day after tomorrow. Is there anything you want? I’ll bring it back for you.]

Shi Zhi pursed his lips. He didn’t like the term “Wife,” but after telling him several times, Xu Yining simply thought he was being shy and refused to change it. Eventually, Shi Zhi grew too tired to keep correcting him.

[No need.]

Shi Zhi planned to go to sleep after replying, but Xu Yining immediately placed a video call. After a moment’s thought, Shi Zhi switched it to a voice call and answered.

“Wife, you’re not asleep?” Xu Yining’s side was very noisy. “I thought you were catching up on sleep, so I didn’t dare call. Have you had lunch?”

Shi Zhi gave a soft “Mmh.” “I’m going to sleep now.”

Xu Yining didn’t notice anything wrong with Shi Zhi’s voice, continuing to talk about whatever he wanted: “We just finished the morning meeting and are having a meal. This restaurant does a roasted duck that’s quite good; you’d definitely like it. I’ll bring you here when there’s a chance.”

Shi Zhi said nothing.

“By the way, Mom called yesterday and said Grandpa is feeling a bit better. He’s clamoring to see you. We’ll go see him together once I’m back.”

Shi Zhi paused, then said, “Okay.”

After hanging up, Shi Zhi let out a deep sigh, threw himself onto his large bed, and fell asleep instantly.

By the afternoon, when it was time to head out, Shi Zhi ran into a dilemma regarding what to wear. Thanks to his preference for staying at home, most of his clothes were loose-fitting with low necklines.

Besides the marks from the tie on his neck, there were also hickeys near his collarbone; even a slight tilt of his head made them visible. In the end, he had no choice but to pick a mock-neck sweater, put on an overcoat, and wrap a scarf around himself to maintain a facade of peace.

“What happened to your neck!” The moment he arrived at Fu Yumeng’s shop and sat down after removing his scarf, Fu Yumeng’s sharp eyes caught the marks on his neck. She spoke incoherently, “Xu Yining actually laid a hand on you?!! I’ll curse his mother… how dare he touch you! I’ll have my brother find someone…”

“No,” Shi Zhi said, hurriedly grabbing her hand and whispering. “He’s been out of town all month; how could he hit me? I did it to myself by accident.”

Fu Yumeng didn’t quite believe him. How “accidental” would it have to be to turn out like this? Unless…

“You tried to hang yourself?” Fu Yumeng’s eyes went wide. “Holy crap, don’t do anything stupid just because you’re upset.”

Shi Zhi was speechless. What kind of logic was that? Even if he were feeling suicidal, he wouldn’t choose hanging; he didn’t even have a place to hang anything. However, Fu Yumeng was his only close friend; Shi Zhi didn’t want her to worry, nor did he want to keep secrets from her. He said, “I slept with someone last night.”

After speaking, he waited with trepidation for his friend’s outburst.

“Oh.”

Seeing no reaction, Shi Zhi repeated, “I said, I slept with someone last night.”

“I heard you. Was it good?” Fu Yumeng asked.

“…” Shi Zhi was at a loss for words. “That’s your only reaction? Nothing else to say?”

“What should I say?”

Shi Zhi was stumped. After waiting for a long time, he said stiffly, “Uh, for example, scolding me for cheating?” Fu Yumeng didn’t know he had broken up with Xu Yining yet; Shi Zhi had thought that with her cynical personality, she would surely denounce him.

Unexpectedly, Fu Yumeng simply waved her hand dismissively. “So what? Even if you cheated, it’s just Xu Yining being useless. I said it long ago: if the sex life isn’t harmonious, trouble is bound to happen sooner or later. Though, before this, I actually thought it would be Xu Yining who strayed.”

Shi Zhi blinked and said nothing.

Seeing this, Fu Yumeng’s brow furrowed. “Did something actually happen? Did Xu Yining really cheat?!!”

Shi Zhi coughed and said softly, “Yu Chongyao sought me out yesterday.”

“God damn it, Xu Yining! As expected, a dog can’t stop eating filth! What a piece of work!” Fu Yumeng cursed with frustration. “I told you back then not to trust him, but you wouldn’t listen. That kind of man thinks with his lower half. All that ‘I haven’t been with anyone since I met you’—bullshit! Only you would believe him.”

Shi Zhi: “Don’t say that. He’s not that bad.”

“Not that bad and he still cheated? He’s a cheater and he’s not bad? If it had been anyone other than Yu Chongyao who provoked you, I wouldn’t even be this angry!”

“I slept with someone, too,” Shi Zhi reminded her. “Yumeng, you’re being a bit double-standard.”

“The essence of humanity is being double-standard! You’re my best friend; what’s wrong with me being a bit biased? For you, I’ll always take your side over reason, even if my conscience suffers for it.”

Shi Zhi gave a happy laugh and said, “Then I can’t let your conscience suffer because of me. I broke up with him.”

Now it was Fu Yumeng’s turn to be stunned. “Ah? When did this happen? Why didn’t you tell me?”

Shi Zhi: “Two months ago?” Seeing Fu Yumeng about to get angry, he hurriedly added, “I proposed it back then. Brother Ning said to wait until he finished his current busy period before talking about it.”

Thinking of her friend’s personality, Fu Yumeng followed up with some concern: “How did you talk about it back then?”

Shi Zhi narrowed his eyes as he recalled. During that time, Xu Yining had said his company was very busy and hadn’t come home for several days. Then, Shi Zhi received a message from a stranger saying Xu Yining was with him, accompanied by a photo. The photo didn’t show faces, only two people embracing from the waist down. But Shi Zhi knew it was definitely Xu Yining because of a tattoo near his navel—a design Shi Zhi had created himself.

Later, when Xu Yining came home and they were having dinner together, Shi Zhi brought up the breakup. At the time, Xu Yining had said, “I’m too busy right now, and I have to go out of town for a while. Wait for me to come back.”

They had gotten engaged right after graduating from university last year, with the wedding set for National Day this year. All their friends and family had already been notified. Now that they were breaking up, the business of calling off the engagement would be a mess; it was bound to be a lot of work and drama. When Xu Yining said to wait until he was less busy, Shi Zhi could understand.

After hearing this, Fu Yumeng’s expression became complicated. She asked Shi Zhi, “Did Xu Yining explicitly say he would handle the engagement cancellation when he returned?” Fearing she was being too subtle for Shi Zhi to understand, she asked directly, “Did he actually agree to the breakup?”

Shi Zhi gave her a strange look and shook his head. “A breakup isn’t a divorce; you don’t need both parties to agree.” Besides, Xu Yining had already given his word.

Fu Yumeng: “…………”

That’s actually very logical. Impossible to argue with. As expected.

Fu Yumeng sighed helplessly. “When he gets back, you need to have a proper talk with him. Be explicit; don’t be vague or ambiguous.”

Although Shi Zhi felt he had already been very clear, he knew Fu Yumeng was only nagging out of concern for him, so he nodded and said, “Okay.”

Fu Yumeng brought Shi Zhi cake and black tea, watching pensively as he slowly ate. After a while, she suddenly asked, “Little A-Zhi, sleeping with someone last night… it wasn’t out of some kind of vengeful mindset, was it? Thinking that since Xu Yining cheated, you’d sleep with someone too just to get even?”

Shi Zhi choked on his tea, his face turning red from coughing. “What are you talking about! How could that be!”

Fu Yumeng thought about it and agreed. Shi Zhi had no need to do that, nor would he degrade himself that way. Xu Yining certainly wasn’t worth Shi Zhi seeking “balance” through revenge.

So, she asked curiously, “Then what happened last night?”

Shi Zhi told her about Yu Chongyao asking to meet, and how he had accidentally wandered to the entrance of a bar. At this point, Shi Zhi emphasized: “I really wasn’t drinking my sorrows away. I just happened to pass by and went in because I recognized the bar you mentioned. I didn’t expect it to be a gay bar!” Then he looked at Fu Yumeng suspiciously. “Yumeng, what do you usually do at a gay bar? It’s full of men; there are no women there.”

And they checked IDs—though as far as he could tell, they only checked his.

Fu Yumeng’s eyes darted around guiltily. “You remembered wrong. I wasn’t talking about [First Encounter]; I meant [Galloping Universe].”

“Oh.” Shi Zhi didn’t dwell on it.

Just as Shi Zhi didn’t challenge Fu Yumeng’s guilt, Fu Yumeng didn’t press Shi Zhi on whether he was drinking his sorrows away—even though that bar was in the completely opposite direction of where he lived. This was the silent understanding between best friends.

“How was your experience last night?” Fu Yumeng leaned over the table. “Was it good?”

Shi Zhi leaned over the table as well, blowing at his hair and giving an embarrassed laugh. “It was… okay.”

Fu Yumeng burst out laughing. “You should have been enjoying yourself long ago.”

“I was just afraid of the pain.”

“Well, it seems the person last night was either small or very skilled, since he didn’t make you hurt.”

Small? Shi Zhi shook his head hurriedly. Not small at all. As for whether he was skilled, Shi Zhi had no basis for comparison, but the man had been very patient and gentle, not crude. However…

“It was because of the drugs. those two thugs were a big help,” Shi Zhi said.

Fu Yumeng laughed loudly. After laughing, her expression turned serious. “Zhi, you and Xu Yining are too entangled. It’s going to be a hassle to call off the engagement, especially with his mother. Your things are still in Xu Yining’s hands. If… I’m just saying if, he uses them as leverage to refuse the breakup, it’ll be very messy. Maybe you should consult a lawyer and prepare in advance.”

Shi Zhi nodded.

“Saying this now is a bit of ‘hindsight is 20/20,’ but I really don’t understand you. Why would you give Xu Yining something so important just because he asked for it?” Fu Yumeng asked.

Shi Zhi gave a light smile. “Who knows.”

Watching him smile, Fu Yumeng felt a strange sense of loneliness. On a whim, she asked, “Shi Zhi, are you sad about separating from Xu Yining?”

Shi Zhi sat up blankly. He heard Fu Yumeng ask:

“Regarding Xu Yining… do you love him?”