You Are My Omega - Chapter 37

The car accident came so suddenly that their mother instinctively shielded Shijiu with her own body.

There was blood.

Shijiu felt a sharp, unbearable pain. Tears streamed uncontrollably down her face. When she opened her eyes, trying to find her mother, all she could see was a sea of blood.

Everything hurt. Her forehead throbbed, her legs ached, but the worst pain of all was in her heart.

Whenever she tried to remember what she saw after opening her eyes, she couldn’t. Maybe it was too traumatic. Maybe it was too overwhelming. No matter how many times she tried, she simply could not recall that moment.

She had blacked out. And when she woke up, her body was wrapped in layers of bandages, like a mummy. The first thing she saw was her sister’s tear-streaked face. Her expression was filled with emotion, and she was smiling. That smile was directed at her.

It was the first time her sister had ever smiled at her.

But that smile wasn’t just happy. It wasn’t just joyful. It was a complicated mix of emotions, so layered that it was impossible to tell what any of them truly were. Her eyes and smile were filled with something much deeper than happiness.

“My sister always thought it was her fault. She believed it was because she insisted that our mother attend her birthday party on time. She pressured her to be there, so Mom didn’t wait for the family driver. She rented a car and drove herself. That’s why she left. That’s why my leg ended up like this.”

“She’s been blaming herself ever since. You see her smiling and acting like everything is fine, but no one really knows if those smiles are real.”

“She was raised by our grandfather to be the heir. Even as a child, she was exposed to the adult world. At first, she treated people with sincerity, but she got hurt badly. She’s not as simple as she looks. She’s actually very calculating. Of course, she’s never like that around us, but I still don’t know if her happiness or her calm is genuine anymore.”

“After we had a huge fight when I couldn’t take the guilt and sorrow in her eyes, she never showed those emotions again. At first, I thought it meant she had moved on. I was happy.”

“But over time, I couldn’t tell the difference between her real smile and her fake one. I didn’t know what she was really thinking. But one thing I was sure of was that she had never truly forgiven herself.”

It wasn’t until one night, when her sister was completely drunk and didn’t even recognize anyone, that Shijiu knew for certain. Her sister held her tightly and cried her heart out. In that moment, Shijiu realized her sister had never let herself off the hook.

Liu Lingyan listened quietly. Everything Shijiu said surprised her, yet somehow felt expected. At least now, she could be sure that all those moments she saw Xu Manyue in a low mood, those dark shadows in her eyes, had been real. They weren’t just her imagination.

She had known that Shijiu’s legs were injured in an accident and that their mother had died in one too. But she never imagined there was such a painful story behind it all.

No wonder Xu Manyue always looked that way whenever her mother was mentioned. No wonder she had never fully explained what happened.

“There’s actually one more thing,” Shijiu said softly, after giving Liu Lingyan a moment to process everything. “It’s about my sister and my mom.”

Liu Lingyan didn’t respond. She listened quietly, though her heart was beginning to ache for Shijiu. Revisiting the accident was like tearing open a wound. Liu Lingyan could only imagine how much pain she was in. Watching her own mother die to protect her must have left a deep scar. And now, to bring it all back up just for her sister’s sake, showed how much Shijiu wanted Xu Manyue to let go.

Shijiu thought she was telling the story calmly. But what Liu Lingyan saw was a girl stubbornly clinging to her mask of composure. What she heard was a trembling voice trying hard to stay strong.

“I don’t know what really happened between my sister and my mom. But for as long as I can remember, my sister didn’t like me. She thought Mom didn’t love her. And Mom thought my sister resented her. The two of them never sat down to talk.”

“I tried really hard to fix things between them. But no matter how I explained, both of them would just say, ‘This is grown-up business. Children shouldn’t get involved.’ And that would shut me down.”

As she said this, Shijiu’s voice filled with quiet frustration.

She still remembered that day at the airport. After all her pleading, her mother had finally agreed to sit down and have a real conversation with her sister once they returned.

But it never happened.

Before they even had the chance, her mother was gone.

And the misunderstanding that had existed between them was never resolved. It remained just a misunderstanding, forever frozen in time.

Liu Lingyan took in every word, storing it carefully in her heart. But now, she couldn’t bear to see Shijiu still pretending to be okay. She spoke gently, “Shijiu, I understand now. I’ll talk to your sister. But for now, can we take a moment to breathe, alright?”

“I am calm,” Shijiu replied, clenching her fists tightly. She really believed she was in control.

“Shijiu…” Liu Lingyan couldn’t stay seated anymore. She didn’t care if Shijiu might be upset with her for getting too close. She quickly walked over and wrapped her arms around her, holding her tightly. Her voice was filled with compassion. “You don’t have to hold it in. If you want to cry, just cry. It’s not good to keep it all bottled up.”

Letting it out would always feel better than suffering alone in silence.

“I’m not crying,” Shijiu whispered, still not pushing Liu Lingyan away. Still trying to be strong.

Liu Lingyan didn’t say anything. She didn’t need to.

Because the girl in her arms had started to tremble. And soon, she could feel the warmth of tears soaking into her clothes, spreading slowly across her stomach.

Tiny drops of sadness, finally allowed to fall.

She was crying.

Liu Lingyan knew.

She had also lost her mother and younger brother in an accident. Luckily, she hadn’t been at the scene. She only saw it afterward, when everything was over. She saw how professionals had already applied makeup to her mother and brother, making them look nearly the same as they had in life.

But the coldness of their skin, the lifeless expressions on their faces, became her recurring nightmares.

For Xu Shijiu, who had been in the accident, who had watched her mother die in front of her, who didn’t even get to see her mother’s face intact, and who lost the use of her legs, that memory must have been unimaginably painful. Liu Lingyan couldn’t truly understand. She didn’t know how long that moment haunted Xu Shijiu’s dreams.

And then there was Xu Manyue.

Because she had insisted that their mother attend her birthday party, their mother had chosen to drive herself instead of waiting for the family driver. That decision led to the accident. Everything that followed was because of that. The guilt Xu Manyue felt could not possibly disappear so easily. That was something anyone could guess. But what surprised Liu Lingyan was how well Xu Manyue had hidden it. Her disguise was flawless. She had kept the truth from everyone around her.

Xu Shijiu and Liu Lingyan never shared with anyone what they had talked about. Naturally, Xu Manyue and Lin Xinyi had no idea. But the redness in their eyes made it obvious that something had happened, something the others weren’t aware of.

“Shijiu, Lingyan, were you crying?” Xu Manyue asked with concern. She didn’t notice how close the two of them were standing, closer than she had ever seen before.

“We just watched a movie. It was emotional, so we cried a little,” Liu Lingyan replied, casually offering an excuse. But her eyes were fixed on Xu Manyue, carefully observing her.

Only now, after learning the truth, did Liu Lingyan realize she had underestimated how much Xu Manyue had been hiding all along.

“Really?” Lin Xinyi didn’t believe it. She turned to Xu Shijiu, trying to get the truth from her. But Xu Shijiu turned her head away and avoided meeting her eyes.

Xu Manyue didn’t quite believe it either. It was somewhat believable that Liu Lingyan, who was pregnant and emotionally sensitive, might cry over a movie. But Xu Shijiu was not the kind of person who would cry over something like that.

“I’m going back to my room,” Xu Shijiu said, pretending not to notice the look Xu Manyue was giving her. She turned her wheelchair and quietly left.

She needed space. Somewhere she could be alone and calm down. And every time she saw Lin Xinyi, she was reminded of the situation between her and Mo Jinlan. That made her feel even more unsettled.

“Alright. I’ll call you when dinner is ready,” Liu Lingyan said gently as she watched Xu Shijiu leave. Xu Shijiu gave a small nod and answered softly, “Okay.”

Xu Manyue looked at them in surprise. She had only gone out for a short while to talk with Lin Xinyi, but when she came back, Xu Shijiu and Liu Lingyan seemed much closer than before.

Xu Shijiu had never really pushed Liu Lingyan away, but she had never fully warmed up to her either. This change was unexpected.

If Xu Manyue had known what the two of them had talked about, she wouldn’t be feeling so relaxed right now.

“Sister, Sister Liu, I’ll head back to my room too,” Lin Xinyi said with a gentle smile, giving them space to talk. She turned and left without another word.

Back in her room, Lin Xinyi felt restless. The things her sister had said still echoed in her mind, replaying over and over.

Xu Shijiu was someone who lacked a strong sense of security. That was why, when she asked Lin Xinyi not to visit Mo Jinlan, she had kept asking for promises again and again. And yet, not only had Lin Xinyi broken that promise, she had brushed her off when questioned about it. What did that say about her?

Was she slowly breaking down the trust Xu Shijiu had built toward her?

Xu Shijiu had always struggled to trust people. She found it hard to open up and let others in. Lin Xinyi had worked hard to slowly earn her trust, little by little. Even now, Xu Shijiu never really shared anything personal. That meant she hadn’t fully accepted her yet. And if things continued this way…

She would eventually destroy that fragile trust. She would shut the door that had only just begun to open.

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