This God-Awful Immortal Realm [GL] - Chapter 2

Chapter 2: This Really Is Ancient Times

“…” A bolt of lightning might as well have struck from the clear sky; Ling Xiyao was instantly fried by the revelation, rendered completely speechless.

Heavens!! Ancient times!!

She was this shocked not because she couldn’t accept the fact that she had transmigrated to ancient times (though that was also true), but because that wasn’t the main point… The point was that this—this—this girl, when asked where they were, actually answered directly with the word “Ancient!” If the person in front of her were truly an ancient woman, shouldn’t the normal answer be “The X Year of the XX Reign, XX City/Village”?!

Thus, in the following instant, her mind rapidly formulated two possible explanations for this bizarre event: 1. It was a joke, and she had simply happened to fall into some film studio complex currently shooting a period drama and was rescued by this woman; or 2. The girl in front of her was also a transmigrator just like herself.

—Any normal person would feel the first possibility was more likely.

As if seeing through her thoughts, the woman sat down sideways on the edge of the bed and added, “I’m also a transmigrator.”

“This person probably read too many transmigration novels and lost her mind, and now she’s using this to mess with people,” Ling Xiyao thought disdainfully. However, since the woman before her was likely her savior, it would be rude to say that out loud. So, she tried her best to remain polite and asked, “Excuse me, what’s the name of the drama being filmed here?”

“This really is ancient times,” the woman shook her head and answered expressionlessly.

“Uh… thank you very much for saving me. May I be so bold as to ask your name? I’ll definitely thank you properly once I get home. Or maybe leave a phone number? Oh, if it’s inconvenient, then never mind.” Ling Xiyao suddenly remembered that actors are usually very unwilling to let others know their phone numbers for fear of being harassed by fans or paparazzi… So she hurriedly corrected herself, “But when I get back, I’ll definitely do my best to help promote this drama and contribute a bit to its viewership ratings.”

“You don’t believe me, do you? This really is ancient times!” the woman replied, emphasizing her tone.

Ling Xiyao stared at the woman’s face, trying to recall if she had ever seen her on TV. Usually, Ling Xiyao didn’t watch TV dramas at all; plus, she had a mild case of face-blindness, so she had no way of determining if this woman was an actress. Besides, even if she were an actress, she might just be an obscure one playing “Maid A,” so her failure to recognize the face proved nothing.

“That joke… is really cold. But, um… I’m very sorry, I really must get back now,” Ling Xiyao ignored her words, pulled back the quilt, crawled out of bed, and slid her feet into her shoes. “I have two good friends who came to Hainan with me; they’re all waiting for me. Er, provided they weren’t swept away by another tornado. If I don’t show up for this long, they’ll be worried sick. But don’t worry, I’ll definitely pay you back for the medical expenses. As long as you have the hospital bill, I definitely won’t dodge the debt. I’ll give you my mobile number and ID number right now…” As she spoke, she began looking around for her bag.

“Please, this really is ancient times!!” the woman interrupted her. “At first, I refused to believe it just like you, but transmigration really isn’t fun! It’s boring to a certain extreme; even having a computer is useless.”

“Having a computer? What does that mean…” Ling Xiyao paused slightly in her surprise at those words, but quickly followed her own train of thought. “Er… Ma’am, could you please return my bag to me first, if you found it? If you’ve taken a liking to me and want me to play a bit-part in your drama, I definitely won’t refuse. After all, you saved me… right?” Ling Xiyao suddenly thought, perhaps it wasn’t her who saved her, but someone else?

The woman showed a frustrated expression, waving her hands about. “I’m telling you, this really is ancient times! What do I have to do to make you believe me?” Then she reached out and pointed to the cabinet by the bed. “There, your bag is here. See for yourself; if your phone isn’t broken, it definitely won’t have a signal. Then you’ll have to believe it.”

Ling Xiyao picked up her handbag and fished out her phone. “Hold on, I need to call those two first to let them know I’m safe, or—hey, what’s going on!” She looked closely; sure enough, there was zero signal. “Is it broken? The legendary Nokia that can crack walnuts shouldn’t be this fragile…” She fiddled with her phone over and over. “It doesn’t look like it; all other functions are normal, and there’s no sign of water damage… Why are you using a signal jammer here?” Weren’t signal jammers used for teachers drafting the National College Entrance Exam? Why use one on her? Did she carry some secret she didn’t know about?

“Now you believe me.” The woman folded her arms across her chest, looking like she was enjoying the show.

“…” Ling Xiyao was speechless once again. “No, look, before you lock me up here, can you tell me why? Even if I die, let me be a ghost who understands! Honestly, my family’s financial situation is very ordinary; even if you want to kidnap me, you won’t squeeze much money out. Please, be magnanimous and just let me go.”

The woman did a face-palm gesture. “Sigh, then what kind of evidence do you think I need to produce for you to believe this is ancient times?” As she spoke, she habitually picked up a cup from the table, held it in front of her but didn’t drink, instead staring at the water in the cup and muttering to herself, “This stuff… I can’t think of any big tricks. Forget it, I’ll just do something basic; the effect might actually be best.” She then turned to Ling Xiyao and said: “Watch me closely, keep your eyes peeled.”

With that, she stood up, extended her hands from her sleeves, gave them a lift and a shake, and spun around on her tiptoes. In the blink of an eye when Ling Xiyao blinked, her figure vanished into thin air. An instant later, a cute little rabbit appeared where she had originally stood. It held its two long ears upright and paced unhurriedly in the room, moving like an elegant lady—not at all like other rabbits that liked to hop and jump around. Even more peculiar was that while the rabbit was generally white, some of the fur on its upper body was tinged with blue, just like the color of the thin shirt she had been wearing.

Ling Xiyao watched all this with her mouth hanging open in shock, her tongue practically sticking out. It took her a long time to come to her senses and stutter, “You… what is this? C-could it be… Tr-transfiguration?!”

The next second, the rabbit vanished, and the woman from before instantly reappeared in the room.

“I think you’ve watched too much Harry Potter, talking about ‘Transfiguration.’ Where did you see me holding a wand?” She rolled her eyes at Ling Xiyao. “This is the Immortal Realm. This is Eastern Xianxia, not Western Fantasy.”

“…” Ling Xiyao felt her vocabulary had completely run dry. But she quickly calmed down. “This is nothing more than a magic trick. Just tell me what you want from me. Or how about this,” she said casually, “if you really can use magic, just send me to the world of Harry Potter. Be a good person and see it through to the end.” She closed her eyes, putting on a face as if ready to face death, but after waiting a few seconds, nothing happened. She only heard a “pfft” of laughter.

“Hey, your expression is way too funny!” She opened her eyes to see the woman pointing at her. The corner of her mouth twitched slightly before returning to a normal expression as she said: “Regardless, you saved me, so it’s only right that I repay you. There’s really no need for this kind of mystery-mongering…”

The woman gave a long sigh. “Then what do I have to turn into to make you believe me? A fox? A tree? A rock? Or make something bigger? Smaller?” She scratched her head, nearly knocking the buyao hairpin off in the process, and hurriedly readjusted it. “I don’t dare shrink you; if I can’t shrink you back later, that would be a real problem.”

Ling Xiyao thought for a moment and pointed at her pillow. “Why don’t you make this pillow bigger for me to see?” She felt that there probably weren’t any mechanical devices inside this pillow; after all, she had just been sleeping on it and felt it was very soft.

Without a word, the woman rolled up her sleeves, extended both hands toward the pillow, and slowly pushed forward as if channeling her power.

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