The Ultimate Glow-Up Guide for Straight Men - Chapter 15

Under the dim lighting of the bar, amidst the gazes of the crowd, Fu Yanshi’s peach blossom eyes curved slightly, a smile lifting the corners of his lips as he looked at Shen Zhinan.

Shen Zhinan stared blankly at the alpha.

Thump-thump.

An overwhelmingly loud sound echoed in Shen Zhinan’s ears.

Why was someone still drumming after the song had ended?

Fu Yanshi waved a hand in front of Shen Zhinan’s face. “Hey, why’d you suddenly freeze up?”

Thump-thump.

The drumming grew even louder.

Someone else was about to start the next song, so Fu Yanshi stood up from the stool and pulled the dazed Shen Zhinan away.

Shen Zhinan, like a robot that had suddenly short-circuited, let Fu Yanshi lead him out of the bar.

His gaze fell on the hand Fu Yanshi was using to pull him along.

Even after leaving the bar, Shen Zhinan could still hear the incessant “thump-thump” sound in his ears.

Only then did he realize no one was drumming. This was… the sound of his own heartbeat.

For some reason, his heart felt as if it were clamoring to burst out of his chest.

It was beating wildly.

Shen Zhinan thought perhaps it was because he had drunk too much today.

He could feel his face growing warm now too.

Seeing that Shen Zhinan still looked dazed, Fu Yanshi pinched his palm lightly and couldn’t help but chuckle. “What’s up with you today?”

That pinch snapped Shen Zhinan out of his trance, and he somewhat awkwardly pulled his hand back.

“Wh-why did we leave?” Shen Zhinan asked.

“I just felt like a lot of people were staring at me,” Fu Yanshi said. “Now that I’m older, I’m not as shameless as I was when I was young. It feels weird being watched by so many people.”

This wasn’t Fu Yanshi being overly self-conscious. Shen Zhinan knew very well how many people had been watching Fu Yanshi after he took the stage, captivated by his singing.

Shen Zhinan himself was one of them.

The two walked one behind the other. The hotel wasn’t far from the bar, just a short walk away.

The evening breeze brushed gently past, rustling the trees along the roadside. Shen Zhinan’s slight drunkenness dissipated a little in the wind, though his heart continued to pound like a drum.

Shen Zhinan looked up and saw Fu Yanshi’s hair slightly tousled by the wind, giving him an untamed, carefree aura.

“That song just now was really nice,” Shen Zhinan suddenly said. “Who’s the original singer? I’ll add it to my playlist when I get back. It’s perfect for listening to when falling asleep.”

“The original singer?” Fu Yanshi glanced back at Shen Zhinan and raised an eyebrow. “Far away in the distance, yet right before your eyes.”

Shen Zhinan stopped walking, surprised. “You’re the original singer!”

“Didn’t I tell you I played in a band during college?” Fu Yanshi smiled. “I wrote that song.”

“That’s amazing,” Shen Zhinan praised sincerely. “You can even write songs.”

“It’s not that well-written,” Fu Yanshi said, slipping his hands into his jacket pockets. “But it was the first song I ever wrote, so it holds some meaning.”

Shen Zhinan quickly added, “I think it’s really well-written, and you sang it beautifully too.”

Hearing this, Fu Yanshi’s peach blossom eyes curved again. “Thank you.”

Shen Zhinan clenched his hands at his sides, a faint blush spreading across his cheeks in the night.

The two chatted intermittently as they walked, soon arriving at the hotel.

Perhaps because they had fooled around too much on the mountain during the day, that night they truly just lay on the hotel bed, leaning against the headboard, tucked under the covers, and talked nothing more.

Fu Yanshi asked, “You’re already a junior in college, right? Any plans for the future?”

Shen Zhinan already had some ideas in mind, but he didn’t want to mention things that weren’t yet certain it would be awkward if he couldn’t follow through. So he replied, “Haven’t really thought about it yet.”

Fu Yanshi suggested, “How about interning at my company?”

Fu Yanshi thought to himself, I’m 27, and Shen Zhinan is only 20 no matter how you look at it, I’d be the one taking advantage.

Even though this kid is a bit clueless and doesn’t know what he wants, I can’t let him walk away with nothing.

Shen Zhinan froze for a moment, locking eyes with Fu Yanshi for two seconds.

Suddenly, Fu Yanshi’s words from the bar echoed in his ears: “He’s taken.”

Shen Zhinan didn’t believe that anyone in this world would be good to someone without a reason. Fu Yanshi had already done many things that went beyond the boundaries of their friends-with-benefits relationship.

At first, Shen Zhinan had only gotten involved with Fu Yanshi because he couldn’t stand his troublesome heat cycle, and by some twist of fate, they’d started this bizarre arrangement.

It was supposed to be a mutual exchange neither owing the other anything.

But then Fu Yanshi had celebrated his birthday, carried him down the mountain, and now even wanted to arrange his internship.

It was all a bit too much.

Shen Zhinan felt something was off.

Before, he’d only had a vague suspicion, but now he was absolutely certain Fu Yanshi had feelings for him!

But!

I only want a physical relationship, not an emotional one!

I really don’t like men!

Shen Zhinan let out a few internal screams.

His head slid slowly from the headboard down to the pillow. “No need. I was thinking of interning next semester.”

Fu Yanshi watched as Shen Zhinan burrowed completely under the covers, leaving only his round head exposed. Unable to resist, he ruffled Shen Zhinan’s hair. “Alright, we can talk about it then.” He reached out to turn off the light and added, “Good night.”

This was the first time Fu Yanshi had ever said “good night” to Shen Zhinan.

And he’d said it while stroking his head.

Good night.

Wan an.

I love you, love you.

Shen Zhinan clenched his fists under the covers. This has to be a hint, right?!

Ever since Shen Zhinan realized Fu Yanshi’s little secret, he’d been feeling uneasy.

On Monday, halfway through his 8 a.m. class, he couldn’t help but zone out.

When Shen Zhinan needed to think things through, he liked to write them down. On a piece of paper, he wrote:

First, I, Shen Zhinan, am straight.

The reason being with Fu Yanshi feels good is because my current body is that of an omega, but my soul is still Shen Zhinan a fine young man from the 21st century.

Even though due to various circumstances I’ve ended up entangled with Fu Yanshi, deep down, I still can’t accept the idea of actually being with a man.

After all, I’ve lived in a heterosexual society for twenty years. Many of my beliefs are deeply ingrained and hard to change.

Second, sex does not equal love.

Being with Fu Yanshi is just a matter of dealing with this body’s needs. We’re simply helping each other out with our physical urges.

Physical reactions and emotional needs shouldn’t be confused.

Third, the class gap.

Even if we set everything else aside, Shen Zhinan was acutely aware of the vast class difference between him and Fu Yanshi.

To put it simply, Fu Yanshi has everything, while I have nothing. It’s like a rich young lady and a poor boy such relationships never last.

Shen Zhinan didn’t believe that love could conquer all obstacles.

So

Even if Fu Yanshi is incredibly handsome, has a great body, sings pretty well, and treats me… decently, based on the above, there’s no way we could work out.

Shen Zhinan scribbled and doodled, then suddenly paused. He let out a sigh.

Anyway… anyway, he couldn’t respond to Fu Yanshi’s feelings they were bound to part sooner or later!

Fu Yanshi, oh Fu Yanshi, stop loving me it’s hopeless!

On Wednesday, the scholarship from the previous semester was deposited, and the income from the few software projects he had recently completed was also decent.

Shen Zhinan glanced at his bank balance and breathed a small sigh of relief.

With the ACM competition approaching, Shen Zhinan found himself thinking every day: why are there only 24 hours in a day? Time was simply not enough.

His junior-year course load was heavy. After the recent academic stream division, there were hardly any general education classes left only specialized courses remained.

Due to the stream division, two of his roommates had been replaced. The two new roommates seemed to have heard about Shen Zhinan’s “glorious past” and often treated him with sarcasm and veiled mockery.

Their words were always dripping with insinuation.

Shen Zhinan later accidentally discovered the reason: one of the new roommates had a crush on Gu Yunshen.

Recently, Gu Yunshen and Lin Xunchuan had been spending a lot of time with him training together, eating together. After the stream division, all three ended up in the same class, sticking together from morning till night. Combined with the earlier rumors, it seemed they thought Shen Zhinan and Gu Yunshen were getting close.

Shen Zhinan hadn’t paid much attention to these comments. After graduation, they probably wouldn’t even see each other again no point in stooping to their level.

Arguing back and forth would only drain his energy.

But one day, when Zhou Luo the roommate who had a crush on Gu Yunshen accused Shen Zhinan of stealing his watch, Shen Zhinan finally reached his limit.

He could brush off idle gossip, but a theft accusation would tarnish his character and credibility.

That day, Shen Zhinan happened to return to the dorm earlier than usual. As soon as he stepped inside, he heard Zhou Luo exclaim loudly, “Hey? Where’s my watch?!”

Shen Zhinan ignored him, sat down at his desk, opened his laptop, and started typing code.

Zhou Luo rummaged around while muttering to himself, “Where did it go? Has anyone seen my watch? My dad gave it to me for my birthday last year it’s really expensive!”

The other two roommates said they hadn’t seen it, so Zhou Luo came over and asked Shen Zhinan, “Shen Zhinan, have you seen my watch?”

Shen Zhinan, busy with his work, replied without looking up, “No.” But Zhou Luo only pressed further, “I’ve searched the whole dorm everywhere except your area. Open your wardrobe and let me check.”

Hearing this, Shen Zhinan’s brow furrowed instantly.

In a low voice, Shen Zhinan said, “I didn’t take your things, and you have no right to search my personal belongings.”

Zhou Luo retorted, “You say you didn’t take it, so prove it just open the wardrobe. Are you avoiding the issue because you’re guilty?”

The implication was unmistakable.

At first, Shen Zhinan thought the guy was just acting out of the blue, but with that remark, he suddenly realized something.

Why was Zhou Luo so fixated on having him open the wardrobe from the start?

Normally, one would begin by checking visible areas like the desk that would be more in line with typical behavior.

Shen Zhinan stared into Zhou Luo’s eyes and faintly sensed a hidden confidence, as if the other was certain the watch was inside his wardrobe.

Shen Zhinan’s lips tightened. He stood firmly in front of his wardrobe, but Zhou Luo tried to push past him regardless.

Just as the two were locked in a standoff, their academic advisor arrived.

Zhou Luo had already contacted the advisor earlier, claiming his expensive watch had gone missing.

As soon as the counselor arrived, students from several neighboring dorm rooms gathered at the doorway to watch the commotion.

“Counselor, I’ve searched the entire dorm except for Shen Zhinan’s area,” Zhou Luo said. “I just want to check his wardrobe. Once I’ve looked, I can clear everyone’s name. But for some reason, Shen Zhinan absolutely refuses to open it.”

The counselor turned to Shen Zhinan and said, “Zhinan, just open it for a quick look.”

Shen Zhinan’s lips were pressed into a tight line, his face dark as he glared at Zhou Luo. Even a fool would have realized by now that this was a setup targeting him.

Shen Zhinan said coldly, “If you want to look, fine but I’m calling the police.”