The Scumbag A Really Doesn't Want to Become Famous [Entertainment Circle] - Chapter 55

“What did you say?”

Yu Youqing’s voice cracked as she spoke.

Even at her most oblivious, she knew exactly who Jiang Musheng was referring to.

Just five minutes ago, she had declared she didn’t want to end her singlehood. Yet no matter how she spun it, she couldn’t fathom that the person Jiang Musheng was talking about was actually her.

Yu Youqing: Frozen in shock.jpg

“Don’t believe me?” Jiang Musheng’s smile softened even further. “Or is it that you don’t dare to believe it?”

She gave Yu Youqing time to process, waiting patiently without rushing her.

But no matter how much time Jiang Musheng granted, Yu Youqing still couldn’t find the right words to articulate her shock.

Countless scenes flashed through Yu Youqing’s mind,

The way Jiang Musheng had looked at her when they first met. Every gesture, every word Jiang Musheng had offered her along the way.

If she really was the “white moonlight” in Jiang Musheng’s heart, then all of Jiang Musheng’s kindness suddenly made sense.

No way.

This couldn’t be real, could it?

Yu Youqing still didn’t dare believe it. She couldn’t even muster a sound.

What was happening? Just five minutes ago, she had been articulate enough to interrupt Jiang Musheng mid-sentence.

“I’m not sure how the host defined ‘white moonlight’ back then, but when I answered that question, I was only thinking of the person I’ve yearned for over the years, someone I’ve never had the courage to approach.” Jiang Musheng’s tone was calm, yet beneath it simmered a restrained intensity. “For me, this has been a years-long journey. So long that it’s become a habit, something I’ve hidden in my life without ever speaking of.”

“I was afraid of burdening her. Afraid she might not feel the same. Too timid to take a single step forward.”

Every word Jiang Musheng spoke resonated deeply with Yu Youqing.

She understood the turmoil behind each syllable because after coming into Jiang Musheng’s life, she had spent a long time tangled in those very same emotions.

It was textbook unrequited love, treating it as a solitary affair, terrified of disturbing the person you adored. Fearful, hesitant, dreading rejection. Wasn’t that exactly how she had felt?

How could…

How could Jiang Musheng’s feelings be for her? Their emotional journeys were identical.

Yet Jiang Musheng’s path seemed even longer, so much so that she described it as a hidden habit woven into her life.

Yu Youqing stared at Jiang Musheng, speechless.

If everything Jiang Musheng said was true, if she really was Jiang Musheng’s “white moonlight”then she had been jealous of herself? But how could Jiang Musheng have fallen for her? They’d had no connection in the past.

Jiang Musheng wasn’t wrong. She didn’t dare believe it.

Yet as absurd as it sounded, Jiang Musheng’s explanation was eerily plausible. Because no one understood the ache of secretly loving someone better than Yu Youqing.

“So I told you, it’s a long enough story that it’s no surprise you didn’t know.” Jiang Musheng spoke as if she could read Yu Youqing’s thoughts. “Xiaoyu.”

These two simple words, spoken in Jiang Musheng’s gentle tone, made Yu Youqing feel as if her heart had been lightly plucked.

It was strange. Others called her the same way, yet she felt nothing.

But when Jiang Musheng said it, it was as if there was an unspoken second half to her words, Trust me.

“What is this supposed to mean?” Yu Youqing asked abruptly.

“It’s not a confession,” Jiang Musheng immediately understood what was on her mind. “I just wanted you to know how I feel. I’ve imagined this moment many times, wondering how to say it without burdening you. But I know the moment I spoke, I already did. I’m not asking for an answer. I just don’t want you to think I have someone else in my heart.”

Jiang Musheng smiled helplessly. “It’s only because I’ve had some drinks tonight that I could say this at all. Normally, I wouldn’t.”

Just this alone made Yu Youqing feel that Jiang Musheng was far braver than her.

Jiang Musheng could still express herself after drinking, but Yu Youqing didn’t dare not even now, when Jiang Musheng had laid her heart bare. She couldn’t bring herself to say, I understand, because I’ve gone through the same.

And if nothing else, they still had to work together in the future.

Yu Youqing knew she was someone who struggled with insecurity. She wasn’t a teenager anymore, no longer brimming with the reckless courage to dive headfirst into a relationship. There were too many uncertainties. With so many upcoming collaborations with Jiang Musheng, she didn’t want her work and emotions to intertwine.

More importantly, how long had they even known each other? They had no foundation to speak of. It was only natural for her to feel something for Jiang Musheng, but that alone wasn’t enough to make her fall in love.

Not even Jiang Musheng’s admission that she had held Yu Youqing in her heart for years was enough to make Yu Youqing take that step.

She hadn’t even sorted out her own feelings yet. She couldn’t rush into something messy.

At the core of it all, she simply didn’t trust love. Deep down, she believed that to give herself over to someone was to hand them a blade, a privilege to stab her right in the heart.

So when Jiang Musheng said she wasn’t expecting a response, only wanting Yu Youqing to understand her feelings, Yu Youqing felt a complicated mix of emotions.

Jiang Musheng was undoubtedly considerate, but that very thoughtfulness and caution left Yu Youqing at a loss. She didn’t know what she had done to deserve such care.

“It’s late. You should get some rest,” Jiang Musheng said.

But Yu Youqing just stood there, unmoving, staring at her.

“Do you think I’m strange? Or cruel?” Yu Youqing’s voice was thick with an inexplicable urge to cry. She felt like she was betraying Jiang Musheng’s sincerity. “I’m sorry. I don’t know how to say this, but I just can’t start something so suddenly.”

“I know,” Jiang Musheng said softly. She had anticipated Yu Youqing’s hesitation the moment she spoke. “That’s why I said I didn’t want to burden you. But it seems I still have. That’s on me, not you.”

Yu Youqing whispered, “Is it?”

She and Jiang Musheng were sitting on the same couch, but nothing else was happening between them. There was still enough space for another person between them, creating a palpable distance.

After some thought, Jiang Musheng decided she should ask Yu Youqing for permission first. She said, “Can I hug you again?”

Yu Youqing: “…”

Jiang Musheng had no choice but to explain, “I wanted to just hug you directly, but I was afraid you might refuse, so I thought I’d ask.”

But how could Yu Youqing possibly say yes out loud? They had just agreed not to pursue a romantic relationship!

In the world of adult pursuits, there weren’t always clear-cut agreements or refusals. If Yu Youqing truly didn’t want this, why would she still be here having this conversation with Jiang Musheng?

Yu Youqing remained silent, and surprisingly, Jiang Musheng waited patiently for her response. Finally, Yu Youqing whispered, “Didn’t I say before that we should accommodate drunk people’s requests? After all, drunk people are the most shameless.”

Jiang Musheng wanted to say she wasn’t being shameless, but just as she was about to speak, she finally understood Yu Youqing’s implied meaning. So she simply moved closer, encircling Yu Youqing in a restrained embrace.

This time, she didn’t let go after hugging her.

Instead, she kept Yu Youqing in her arms, one hand gently cradling the back of Yu Youqing’s head. Her voice was softer than the bright moon in the night sky.

“This is my first time feeling this way about a girl, so there’s much I don’t understand.” Jiang Musheng’s voice carried an apology. “I know our current situation wouldn’t give you the security to fully commit to a relationship, it would feel unstable, unsettling. That’s why I said you don’t need to respond. I want you to watch what I do instead.”

Yu Youqing listened quietly.

“This was never about forcing you to make a decision, so don’t feel pressured.” Jiang Musheng chuckled, letting Yu Youqing lean against her. “Who in their right mind confesses their feelings and immediately demands commitment? That’s coercion, not courtship. To see if someone is worthy, you need time to observe.”

Feeling Yu Youqing’s slight tension, aware that she wasn’t comfortable with such closeness, Jiang Musheng simply stroked her hair soothingly. “Do you understand what I mean?”

“I do.” Yu Youqing’s chin rested on Jiang Musheng’s shoulder. From this angle where Jiang Musheng couldn’t possibly see, her expression was relaxed but she only allowed herself this brief moment of ease.

She couldn’t let herself drown in this.

Yu Youqing felt she was being remarkably clear-headed, almost excessively so. Jiang Musheng truly respected her, putting her needs first. Otherwise, as an alpha, Jiang Musheng could have easily used pheromones to pressure her. That primal instinct would have made resistance impossible, making her surrender completely, wanting nothing more than to belong to Jiang Musheng.

But Jiang Musheng didn’t do that.

Yu Youqing closed her eyes. Jiang Musheng’s embrace was so warm it made her want to lower all her defenses, to confess how she’d struggled through those two chaotic years, how waking up now felt like being reborn.

But she knew she couldn’t.

When Yu Youqing pulled away from Jiang Musheng’s arms, only then did her scattered thoughts begin to settle slightly.

“It’s time for bed, Teacher Jiang.” Yu Youqing said to Jiang Musheng face to face, “Remember what you promised me before we started talking today was just a drunken conversation, and you’ll forget everything when you wake up.”

Jiang Musheng watched as Yu Youqing stood up, her gaze following Yu Youqing’s movements. She suppressed the urge to get up after hearing Yu Youqing’s words.

“I’m dizzy, can’t walk,” Jiang Musheng said.

“Really?” Yu Youqing had just been listening to Jiang Musheng speak and found her words perfectly coherent, completely sober nothing like someone who was drunk. It even made her doubt Jiang Musheng’s alcohol tolerance.

“Really,” Jiang Musheng repeated, nodding. Seeing that Yu Youqing had stopped moving, she knew her tactic was working. “Aren’t you going to fulfill a drunk person’s request?”

Yu Youqing: “…”

She had no choice but to turn back.

Jiang Musheng was acting spoiled now. As a skilled actress, playing drunk was effortless for her.

She reached out to Yu Youqing.

Yu Youqing: “?”

“Help me up,” Jiang Musheng said. “I can’t get up on my own.”

Yu Youqing had no choice but to comply after all, she was still living in Jiang Musheng’s house. No matter what, this wasn’t just a superstar but also her landlord.

She helped Jiang Musheng up, supporting her arm over her shoulder. But Jiang Musheng couldn’t bear to actually lean her weight on Yu Youqing, using just enough of her pull to stand up on her own.

Yu Youqing guided Jiang Musheng to the second-floor staircase and stopped.

One more floor up was Jiang Musheng’s room.

Yu Youqing let go. “Can you manage from here?”

“No,” Jiang Musheng rubbed her forehead but spoke in a perfectly clear voice. “Could you take me up?”

Yu Youqing hesitated for two seconds before telling herself to be more considerate after all, Jiang Musheng had drunk so much tonight because of her.

“Let’s go.”

This was Yu Youqing’s first time on the third floor.

It was Jiang Musheng’s private space. Even when she had toured the house before moving in, Yu Youqing had never seen Jiang Musheng’s room. For some reason, as she stood before the door, she felt a flicker of nervousness.

“Don’t be nervous,” Jiang Musheng said.

“…” Yu Youqing took a deep breath. “Teacher Jiang, has anyone ever told you that some of the things you say when drunk make people want to hit you?”

“No,” Jiang Musheng casually turned the doorknob. “You’re the first.”

Yu Youqing stopped at the doorway. “I’m leaving.”

“But I haven’t made it to the bed yet,” Jiang Musheng said. “What if I fall on the way?”

Yu Youqing suspected Jiang Musheng was just being shameless, but when she met those sincere eyes, she couldn’t find any evidence.

Fine.

Jiang Musheng’s teasing had dispelled the last of Yu Youqing’s melancholy. She glanced inside and saw that Jiang Musheng’s room was simple cool gray-toned bed and furniture, minimalist, much like the impression Jiang Musheng gave off.

There was a sense of detachment from the world, nothing superfluous just the bare essentials.

Yu Youqing helped Jiang Musheng sit on the bed, ready to leave for real this time, but as she turned, Jiang Musheng caught her wrist.

“What’s wrong?” Yu Youqing thought Jiang Musheng was about to come up with another excuse to stop her from leaving, so she deliberately put on a stern face and said seriously, “Don’t say anything more! I won’t answer you anymore, I don’t believe you, you’re definitely not drunk!”

She looked like a little kitten about to puff up and bare its claws. Jiang Musheng smiled indulgently.

“Goodnight,” Jiang Musheng said, her eyes curving into crescents. “I just wanted to say goodnight to you.”

Yu Youqing froze, then after a moment completely forgot her declaration about never responding again and replied, “Goodnight.”

“I’m not drunk,” Jiang Musheng murmured, lowering her gaze to her fingertips where she could still faintly feel the lingering warmth of Yu Youqing’s skin. She slowly curled her fingers inward. “I’ll remember this.”

After a pause, she added, “And I’ll keep trying, until the day you’re willing to believe me.”

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