The Gentle Breeze Reflects in My Eyes - Chapter 20

Chapter 20

Gu Yitong realized that the harder she tried to pry Xia Lusheng’s hand open, the tighter the girl clenched it. She immediately let go, switching to a different way of reaching her.

“Lusheng, let go. Let go of your hand, Lusheng,” Gu Yitong’s voice trembled. As she spoke, she wrapped her arms around Lusheng’s shoulders and pulled her into a protective embrace.

Suppressing her own rising panic, Gu Yitong gently patted the girl’s back. “Be good, Lusheng. Listen to Yitong-jie. Let go of your hand.”

The name “Yitong” acted like a tiny switch. Xia Lusheng suddenly stirred, her consciousness slowly returning to the present.

“Let go, Lusheng,” Gu Yitong coaxed softly.

Xia Lusheng’s mouth opened, her voice sounding forced and distorted. “…Yitong-jie?”

“It’s me, I’m here,” Gu Yitong replied instantly. “Lusheng, don’t clench your fist. Be good and let go.”

The surrounding martial arts brothers, seeing the girl finally speak, were so tense they hardly dared to breathe, their eyes fixed on her every reaction.

Lusheng’s response was sluggish. It took a long time for her to process the words, and she eventually murmured a repetition: “Hand… hand.”

“That’s it, the hand. Lusheng, open your hand,” Gu Yitong guided her, gently prying the fingers outward.

Xia Lusheng remained in a daze and didn’t reply, but she followed the movement and slowly opened her palm. Three deep, bloody crescent marks from her fingernails were revealed in the center of her hand.

Gu Yitong averted her gaze, unable to bear looking closely. She held Lusheng close, whispering into her ear, “Lusheng, don’t move. Endure it for a bit and let Lu Feng clean and bandage it for you, okay?”

Lu Feng had already been waiting with the first-aid kit. Hearing the cue, he nimbly opened it and touched a cotton ball soaked in antiseptic to her palm.

The previously lethargic Lusheng suddenly jolted. Recalling something terrifying, she jerked her hand back and turned to lock her arms around Gu Yitong’s waist. She squeezed so hard it actually hurt; the force felt as if she wanted to embed Gu Yitong into her own bones.

Gu Yitong patted her gently and whispered more words of comfort, trying to get her to let go so her wound could be treated. But Lusheng was stubborn, and her grip only tightened.

Helpless, Gu Yitong allowed Lusheng to keep holding her, settling for a compromise where the girl hugged her with one arm while extending the injured hand. This time, after a moment’s hesitation, Lusheng obeyed. Lu Feng carefully finished the bandaging.

Throughout the process, Lusheng leaned into Gu Yitong’s embrace without a word, holding on as if Gu Yitong would vanish the moment she let go.

Once the bandages were on, Gu Yitong wanted to ask Lu Feng what had happened, but she couldn’t bring herself to push the clingy girl away. She pulled out her phone and sent a text to Lu Feng.

— What happened? Why did Lusheng suddenly lose control?

Lu Feng shook his head frantically, indicating he truly didn’t know. He deleted her text and typed back:

— Senior Sister! I have no idea! She was already like that when I noticed!! That’s when I called you!!! If you don’t know what’s wrong with her, how would I?!!!

The screen was full of exclamation marks. Gu Yitong sighed and pocketed her phone, looking down to comfort Lusheng. Finally, Lusheng spoke in a low, raspy voice. “…I want to go home.”

“Okay,” Gu Yitong said immediately. “We’re going home.”

…

After getting into the car and buckling Lusheng’s seatbelt, Gu Yitong noticed the girl’s face was still deathly pale. Gu Yitong felt a mixture of pity, irritability, and… fear.

Yes, fear.

Lusheng’s behavior reminded her of the self-harm from their previous life. She was terrified that despite her efforts, history was repeating itself. They sat in silence in the car even after arriving at the apartment.

Suddenly, Gu Yitong’s phone rang. She ignored it twice, but it rang a third time. It was Mother Gu.

“Hello? Mom?”

“Why do you sound so listless?” Mother Gu asked. “And you’ve got a nasally voice—did you catch a cold?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Is something wrong?”

“Jingwen’s teacher called,” Mother Gu said energetically. “There’s a parent-teacher meeting in a month. You’re going!”

“That’s a month away. We’ll talk about it then.”

“No! I’m telling you now so you keep the time free. November 9th, Monday. Mark it down!”

Gu Yitong didn’t have the energy to argue. “I got it.”

…

After a quick shower and changing her clothes, Gu Yitong brought her pillow into the master bedroom. Seeing Lusheng sitting on the bed tracing Braille with one hand, she said, “Lusheng, I’m sleeping with you tonight.”

Lusheng froze, put the book down, and nimbly crawled further onto the bed.

“Be careful! Don’t hit your hand!” Gu Yitong warned.

Lusheng’s emotions had stabilized. She followed the sound of Gu Yitong’s voice, kneeling on the bed and reaching out until she touched her. She sat down and tugged at Gu Yitong’s shirt.

Gu Yitong stood by the bedside as Lusheng leaned her head against her. The girl looked like a child who had done something wrong. “I’m sorry, Yitong-jie,” she whispered softly.

Gu Yitong remained silent.

“I didn’t mean to make you worry… I’m sorry…”

Gu Yitong let out a long sigh and rubbed the girl’s head. Just those few words were enough to melt her heart.

“Why did you get like that?” Gu Yitong asked eventually.

Lusheng bit her lip. “I… I don’t know. I heard them say you were knocked down. I couldn’t control myself. I kept thinking if you were badly hurt, if you couldn’t move… the more I thought, the more scared I got. I… I had to pinch myself to try and stay calm. And then… I didn’t know anything else…”

Her voice grew smaller, afraid Gu Yitong would be angry.

Gu Yitong was stunned. She never expected that to be the reason. She didn’t know how to feel—knowing Lusheng lost control out of concern for her was a comfort, but the self-inflicted pain was like a knife to her heart.