Please Kill My Husband - Chapter 4

A flicker of bewilderment crossed Kedilen’s face.

Only one response had ever come from Ludmilla’s lips: “I’m sorry.”

He had trained her to say it. Conditioned her to believe it was the only acceptable answer.

But this time, her reply was different.

“Ludmilla. Are you defying me right now?”

He should have been apologizing. Instead, she was challenging him.

The unfamiliar defiance made him question what he’d just heard.

“Are you in your right mind?”

The confusion didn’t last. It curdled into anger.

Kedilen’s brow furrowed. His voice rose.

“I told you many times. This banquet is important. I said to memorize everything. Did you forget?”

“I was sick.”

“What?”

“I couldn’t eat properly for days because of a bad cold. Didn’t you receive the report?”

She had indeed been ill in the days leading up to the banquet. Despite her condition, she had pushed through hostess duties, day and night, trying to memorize the guest list. Her body had barely held up.

“You were sick? I never heard such a report.”

“That’s unfortunate. I both reported it and told you directly.”

“You speak well. But that doesn’t erase the sin of forgetting. And frankly, I’m embarrassed to even listen to the rest of what you’re saying.”

How easily he forgives himself, yet how merciless he is with me.

Ludmilla gave a dry laugh in her mind.

Kedilen turned away.

“When we return, you’ll fast for two days. It’s only natural to be punished for your mistakes, so don’t feel wronged. Furthermore…”

Kedilen, passing by Ludmilla’s side, looked her up and down and frowned.

“You seem to have gained weight lately.”

Just as she was thinking that only her husband could make such an outrageous comment about her gaining weight, when other noble ladies worried, she was too thin, Ludmilla’s lips curled up with a dry breath.

“Lose some weight while fasting. I don’t want to hear people say my wife has gotten fat and ugly.”

They had not had a single intimate experience as husband and wife in three years of marriage.

Yet Kedilen’s obsession and interest in Ludmilla’s body was because his own value increased the higher her reputation and standing became.

“Yes, I’ll be careful.”

Ludmilla replied briefly, feeling no value in further response.

Kedilen stared at her for a moment, then sighed shortly and turned to leave the terrace.

As soon as he opened the door and left, putting on his pleasant mask again, Ludmilla hesitated as if waiting for something, then took a short breath and stepped out of the terrace.

“Eek!”

At that moment, as soon as she came out, Ludmilla collided with a noblewoman who seemed to have been waiting, and wine as red as blood spread across her dress.

“Oh, oh my… Goodness, Marchioness!”

The noblewoman who had been making a fuss in surprise turned pale and trembled upon seeing Ludmilla’s face.

Spilling wine on Ludmilla, who was revered among the noblewomen, was an incident that could get her ostracized from high society with just one word from Ludmilla.

Indeed, eyes turned towards them, and people whispered as they saw Ludmilla’s dress-stained red.

Kedilen, who had been walking ahead, seemed to have noticed the situation and turned back towards Ludmilla after finishing his calculations.

“Are you alright, my lady!?”

The noblewomen and gentlemen were surprised to see him bending down to wipe Ludmilla’s dress with a handkerchief embroidered with his name. A marquis bending his knee for his wife everyone reacted with envy or amazement.

These fresh reactions could only come from those unaware that this was the conclusion reached by that cunning mind working disgustingly.

“I’m, I’m so sorry. I made a mistake…”

Ludmilla silently watched the noblewoman, who had suddenly become a sinner before the two of them, trembling. Then she put on a kind smile.

“It’s alright. Don’t worry about it.”

“But, but…”

“I should have been more careful coming out. It’s not your fault. So please don’t worry. I can just change clothes.”

Yes, it’s not your fault. It’s my fault for bumping into you on purpose, even though I knew.

If before I couldn’t avoid it because my body wasn’t normal due to the cold, this time I deliberately collided. Because I wanted to escape from here and also to check if I really had returned to the past.

“Thank you so much for saying that, Marchioness. I will absolutely compensate you for the dress. I really will!”

“Thank you.”

Only the noblewoman, unaware of this, kept bowing deeply. Meanwhile, Kedilen, who had been observing the situation, stood up.

“If you’re going to change clothes, I’ll go with you.”

“No, it’s fine. It’s an important banquet, so the Marquis should stay. I’ll be back soon.”

“But, Alright, I understand.”

To Ludmilla, his reluctant acquiescence was laughable.

Feeling no need for further conversation, Ludmilla gave a short nod and turned away.

Unlike before, she didn’t turn back several times to check her husband’s expression.

She simply retreated with her back straight, receiving people’s gazes.

The feeling was different from then. In the past, she had been miserable and afraid.

Even though it wasn’t her fault, she had been afraid of what harsh words and physical abuse she might face when she returned.

For Ludmilla, life was survival and a struggle to live.

As an illegitimate child of the imperial family with nowhere to go, Ludmilla tried to survive even on that dry and cracked dangerous plateau.

Like plantain spreading its seeds while being trampled by people’s feet in barren India, she too chose her own way of survival.

The only flaw was that it was a meaningless fluttering of wings, useless for anything.

“Marchioness…!?”

Ludmilla’s appearance as she entered the assigned room was enough to startle the maid who had been working inside.

A red stain had settled on the dress that had been shimmering with a subtle blue color.

It was the right size and color to mark a blemish on her perfect appearance.

“I’ll, I’ll prepare another dress right away!”

“Take your time.”

Unlike Ludmilla, who spoke calmly with a composed face, the maid’s feet were busy. Changing out of a stained dress was a difficult task.

From the corset to accessories and hair everything had to be redone. It was a challenging task for a maid to do alone.

Even the experienced and skilled maid seemed to find the current situation awkward, biting her lip as she began to disassemble Ludmilla’s dress.

In contrast to the noisy and busy maid, Ludmilla’s face was eerily calm.

For Ludmilla, changing clothes was like a doll play.

If she stood still, someone would come to undress her, attach accessories, style her hair, and put on a new dress.

All Ludmilla had to do in this process was stand still.

That was all. An ordinary process with nothing special about it. It was just a bit slower than before.

‘Back then, I got scolded for being late because of this.’

As Ludmilla calmly exhaled, recalling the memories of that day, her eyelids lifted slightly.

The time it took to change dresses was so delayed that she arrived as the banquet was ending, and ended up being slapped by Kedilen.

A faint smile formed on her dry face as her smooth lips moved slightly.

At that time, she had thought this much was fortunate.

She had expected to be hit more, so this much seemed lucky. But at the same time, it had also been the catalyst for deciding something.

What was it?

Ludmilla searched through her blurred memories to recall the events of that day.

Though it didn’t come to mind clearly, as if obscured by fog, there was definitely something. Something not particularly special, but some,

“Oh my!?”

The surprised voice of the maid rang in Ludmilla’s ear as she was lost in thought.

Ludmilla’s head, which had been fixed like a rooted tree, moved.

Her gaze fell on the maid who was fiddling with her dress beside her.

The maid was looking towards the door with a surprised expression, not at her.

Her neat and full eyelashes lifted. The red tint that had been slightly visible through the gap shone in an even more vivid color.

“…”

When her blood-red eyes, beautiful as crimson, reached the door, Ludmilla realized what she had forgotten.

A tall man with black hair standing in the doorway.

His golden eyes, reminiscent of a beast, were tinged red by the crimson sunset.

‘Aden-.’

Ludmilla bit her lip as she recalled his name upon seeing him. Yes, this was it. She had forgotten.

The cowardly man who had avoided her plea for protection like a buoy. At the same time, the man who had made the most realistic choice.

Ludmilla had completely forgotten about meeting this man. She couldn’t understand why.

Clearly, he was the man who had been at the fingertips of the hand she had reached out to live at the end of her life.

It seemed like something she should have remembered, yet she had forgotten.

The man’s reaction upon seeing the noblewoman’s back clearly exposed on both sides was singular.

“I’m sorry!”

“There’s no need to apologize, just leave. You don’t have to say you’ll help either.”

“…What?”

The tall man frowned his thick eyebrows, more bewildered than when he had seen the woman’s bare skin.

Ludmilla swallowed a small breath and turned her waist to face forward.

“You can go.”

She no longer intended to ask that man to kill her husband. It was survival of the fittest.

With no one to save her now, all Ludmilla could do was safely complete today’s banquet.

Then, whether she killed her husband Kedilen with her own hands or fled – all that was for later.

“Seeing a bit of my back doesn’t bother me.”

A voice so devoid of emotion it was even more chilling. Ludmilla’s back was painted rose-colored by the sunset.

Scars that looked as if they had been torn by something created the illusion of being soaked in blood. At that moment, Ludmilla’s red eyes, turned slightly, roughly tore through the man Aden’s field of vision.