I’ve Decided to Let You Go - Chapter 5

Was Sieghart truly embarrassed? Or had he simply run away because he wasn’t ready?

In truth, it was Natasha who turned away from the obvious answer. She clung to foolish excuses to defend him, insisting there must be a reason. And in the end, she reached the absurd conclusion: she should at least hear him out.

After the wedding ceremony, Natasha returned to the mansion and waited for her husband in her room.

She wasn’t sure how much time had passed when she suddenly heard a sound outside the door. It was so quiet, one would have to strain to hear it, but Natasha noticed it and swallowed hard. Though tired from waiting, she straightened her back, ready to welcome him.

She couldn’t tell who it was beyond the door, but in her heart, she wished it was Sieghart.

The moment she realized the footsteps didn’t match his, disappointment crept in.

Turning back with that disappointment still in her chest, she was startled when she finally saw who it was.

“…Kayeina?”

Light wheat-colored hair, perfectly straight without a hint of curl. Cat-like eyes and vivid green irises.

It was Kayeina Ten—her dear friend and former maid from the royal palace, someone who had been with Natasha for many years.

“Yes, Princess. It’s me.”

Natasha was surprised, not just by Kayeina’s sudden appearance, but also by the uniform she was wearing—she was dressed as a maid of House Aschart.

“Kayeina… what are you doing here?”

“What do you think? I’ve been working here at the duke’s estate, as you can see.”

Kayeina stepped forward and gently took Natasha’s hand. Her hands were warm and comforting.

“I heard about Sir Dante. I was told he’s staying at the countryside villa. We’ve exchanged letters from time to time… He mentioned you here and there. You’ve had a hard time, haven’t you?”

Natasha had so many questions she wanted to ask, but as soon as Kayeina spoke, all of them vanished from her mind.

The quiet waves that had been stirring inside her heart suddenly crashed over her like a storm. The feelings she had buried deep within her finally broke free.

“…Yes, a little…”

“I regret not being there for you when you needed someone. If I had been by your side, maybe things would’ve been a little easier. I missed you so much, Princess. I used to ask Sir Dante about you whenever I could, just to ease my worries.”

With those kind words, Kayeina embraced the pain Natasha had carried alone for so long—and that was all it took. Natasha, unable to hold back any longer, finally burst into tears. She had tried to keep her emotions in check, but her grief and loneliness overwhelmed her resolve.

And for the first time, she let it all out—the words and emotions she had kept hidden. The guilt of surviving after losing her family. The fear and sadness over an uncertain future. Things she had kept to herself so she wouldn’t worry Sir Dante.

“You’ve been through so much… From now on, don’t keep it to yourself. Tell me everything. I’ve always been on your side, Princess. And even now—here—I’ll do everything I can to take care of you… not just as a maid, but as someone who truly cares.”

Kayeina gently brushed Natasha’s cheek. Her soft touch tilted Natasha’s face so their eyes met.

“I missed you. So much.”

Those deep green eyes studied her face intensely, as if trying to take in everything she had lost and endured. Natasha felt strangely shy under the weight of that gaze.

“By the way… can I ask when you started working here? I don’t think I saw you at all during the past month.”

“Oh, I had to visit my hometown for a while. But I’ve actually been working for House Aschart for quite a while now—over a year, in fact.”

Kayeina then explained how she ended up working for the duke’s household.

She told Natasha that Sieghart had recognized her when she disguised herself as Natasha and, thanks to that, spared her life. Afterward, she needed to find work—but no one was willing to hire a former maid of the fallen royal family. House Aschart was the only place that took her in.

“You were going to die in my place? That’s reckless! What if His Grace hadn’t recognized you? You could’ve been executed!”

“I only did what I had to. I was your maid, after all. Honestly, if you hadn’t taken me in back then, I would’ve died anyway—poor and mistreated. So, it doesn’t matter.”

With a gentle smile, Kayeina tried to shift the mood and change the subject.

“Actually, His Grace used to ask about you now and then. He’d come to me with questions about what you liked. I had no idea the two of you would end up getting married while I was away!”

She had brought up a name Natasha wasn’t ready to face—Sieghart Aschart.

“His Grace is a good man. You know that, don’t you?”

Natasha, who had spent the last six months with him, knew better than anyone just how good he was.

But still…

“Kayeina…”

After a moment of hesitation, Natasha spoke quietly.

But before she could finish, the door suddenly opened. Both women turned their eyes toward the sound.

“Oh no.”

“…”

“Seems I’ve unintentionally interrupted your time together.”

The man who stood there stared closely at them. Despite his words, there wasn’t a trace of apology in his expression. On the contrary, his gaze clearly expected Kayeina to step aside—almost as if her departure was inevitable now that he had arrived.

“No, I’m the one who interrupted. I’m terribly sorry. I’ll get out of your way right now.”

Kayeina bowed politely and quickly left the room.

Kayeina stood up abruptly and stepped out of the room. The door slammed shut with a clatter, echoing the commotion it had caused when it opened. And when all the noise faded, only silence remained between the two.

“Princess.”

Sieghart walked toward her and finally bowed slightly. His eyes were fixed on the tear marks that had stained Natasha’s cheeks. Reaching out, he gently brushed his hand against them.

Natasha wondered what he was about to say.

Would he, at last, explain what happened at the wedding?

“Marriage.”

Yes, now that they were alone, surely, he would speak in detail—so she wouldn’t be left feeling hurt.

“Congratulations.”

“…What?”

“And welcome to House Aschart.”

Sieghart gave a soft smile as he spoke. A clean, uncomplicated expression—one that almost seemed to declare his innocence.

Ah…

The first words out of his mouth weren’t an explanation.

Not even an apology that hinted at guilt. Instead, they were oddly off-topic—a congratulation and a welcome, as though the events of the wedding had been completely forgotten.

Her fragile hopes were crushed, and the disappointment showed plainly on her face. Natasha gently pulled his hand away from her cheek.

“Your Grace… about the wedding… Why didn’t you kiss me?”

It made her feel pathetic—like she had been suffering alone all this time. The frustration she had suppressed for three weeks finally broke loose.

“That’s not all. How could you go three whole weeks without seeing me even once? Now that I think about it… is it because I’m a princess from a fallen kingdom? Did you change your mind? Is that why you didn’t want to have dinner with me… or kiss me…? If that’s how you truly feel… then let’s call it off. We can annul the marriage, and I’ll return to where I belong. Just let me go.”

She couldn’t bear to say the word goodbye while looking him in the eyes, so she kept her gaze distant, speaking more to herself than to him.

Legally, it took about two days after the ceremony for a marriage to be fully registered. Until then, it could be annulled without going through the process of divorce.

So, if she left now, it could all be undone. She could pretend the sweet moments shared with Sieghart were nothing more than a dream.

Yes… a princess from a fallen kingdom was far better suited to life as a commoner—Tisha Winter—than to the title Natasha Aschart. That name didn’t belong to her.

“Tisha.”

The man stepped closer to her, his voice low and quiet as he called out her nickname. A name he’d never been permitted to use until now—but one he could call her freely, as her husband.

He stared into her eyes, now damp and red from crying, and gently touched the corner of her eyes, then her cheek.

Then, without hesitation, he leaned in. Close enough for their noses to brush.

His hair tickled her forehead. His breath was heavier, sweeter—so thick it felt like it might suffocate her. Their noses bumped as their faces grew closer.

In an instant, everything between them closed. That included the space between their lips.

Sieghart gently took her upper and lower lip between his own, one at a time. As Natasha reacted to the unfamiliar sensation, he slid something warm into her parted mouth.

His tongue.

It moved as though it knew the way—grazing her teeth, brushing softly against the roof of her mouth, then deeper, teasing and exploring. It swept with a delicate touch, occasionally meeting hers with a carnal hunger.

Eventually, Natasha let out a soft gasp. A thin string of saliva stretched between their lips. The taste in her mouth was unfamiliar—a mixture of warmth and something subtly foreign.

“…Your Grace?”

“You were adorably mistaken.”

Still cupping her flushed cheeks, Sieghart finally offered the explanation—far too late.

“I didn’t kiss you at the wedding because I was trying to be considerate. I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to hold back. I didn’t want to lose control in front of everyone and… ravish you.”

“…”

“And I didn’t like the idea of our first kiss—something so meaningful—being watched by others.”

With his quiet confession complete, Sieghart moved his hand down, resting it on the pale curve of her neck. His fingers slowly traced the delicate skin before gripping the back of her head.

As if bound by natural law, their bodies leaned in and pressed against each other. It was a silent signal of a second, deeper hunger.

The sound of birds chirping woke Natasha from sleep. She winced at the ache in her lower back and gave up on trying to sit up, lying back down instead. Now that she noticed the pain, it throbbed even when she stayed still.

“You’re awake.”

A deep, low voice made her snap to full consciousness. She stirred under the blanket, then poked her head out, startled to find Sieghart already awake and sitting at the table.

He folded the newspaper he’d been reading and walked over to her. He pressed a kiss to her forehead and handed her a teacup, still steaming from freshly brewed tea.

“Good morning, Princess.”

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