Inertial Dependence - Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Do You Like It?

The first time Yan Ciwei saw An Chixu’s body was during their middle school years.

There was only a half-year difference between their birthdays, and they were in the same high school class.

At the time, An Chixu was introverted and quiet, with only two or three friends she ate with; her presence was very low. Yan Ciwei was a star pupil at school—her grades were excellent, she was passionate about explaining problems to classmates, and she would share exercise materials.

No matter how much she tried to stay low-key, everyone could see the difference in her every gesture, and her occasional flashes of insight were something people looked up to.

The two were like clouds and mud, worlds apart, and should have had no interaction at all.

It was Yan Ciwei who first noticed this kitten hidden in the corner. Like a kind-hearted human, she approached with the posture of someone tending to a stray cat, personally shattering the tranquility of An Chixu’s life.

That day, there was a sudden downpour, and An Chixu was splashed with mud. Her parents were divorced and living apart, each having started a new life. As the “old” daughter, An Chixu had nowhere to go, and there was no one to care for her even if she went home. Yan Ciwei quietly took her back to her own house.

At that time, An Chixu still trusted her “human” deeply. The summer rain drenched her lashes, and her almond-shaped eyes carried a watery light as she crouched on the floor, looking up at Yan Ciwei. Yan Ciwei took down a towel and, without a word, covered her head, muffling her face in a layer of dampness.

The pampered Young Mistress didn’t know how to care for a stray cat, let alone a person of her own age. She rubbed helplessly and haphazardly. An Chixu closed her eyes and let herself be swayed. Her heart swayed too, thumping in a way that left her at a loss.

The dining table was right beside them, the chairs made of fine wood and padded with soft cushions. Yet Yan Ciwei preferred to kneel on the cold floor with An Chixu. She was a good owner; she wanted to be with the kitten she was raising.

“Are your mothers not home?” Once the water was wiped dry, An Chixu was picked up by Yan Ciwei. Leaning in her arms, smelling the earthy scent of rain and mud, An Chixu’s voice became thick and indistinct, sounding almost like a cat’s purr.

“I count as an out-of-town student,” Yan Ciwei said with a light chuckle, leading An Chixu to the bathroom. Her mind was full of self-mockery regarding her attention-seeking methods, yet her smile radiated a gentle kindness, slowly drying the humid heat of the sudden storm.

An Chixu relaxed her brow and stood still, waiting for Yan Ciwei to unbutton her school uniform. She was completely defenseless. That outer shell was fragile, and Yan Ciwei unfastened it carefully and slowly. Any faster, and she feared she wouldn’t be able to restrain the impulse in her heart. But An Chixu was pressed right against her; in those misty eyes, aside from a sudden downpour, there was only Yan Ciwei.

She wouldn’t go anywhere. Sixteen-year-old An Chixu felt a fullness of care for the first time and mistook it for love. She was a stray cat abandoned by love, her instinct always pointing toward the center of love’s mass. Yan Ciwei read all of this through the haze of the rainwater.

The moment the clothes were shed, An Chixu chose her, falling completely into her embrace. Sixteen-year-old Yan Ciwei thought that the touch of that fair skin was called “forever.”

So, eighteen-year-old Yan Ciwei repaid An Chixu. In the apartment near the university, Yan Ciwei reached her hand out to An Chixu. Her clothes were half-open, the tips of her hair carrying the lingering scent of geranium. Her face was covered in a light sweat, showing a healthy flush under the setting sun. She knew how much of an attraction this appearance held for An Chixu. It was deliberate, yet innocent.

An Chixu had long ago fallen into her trap and would not break free, so she learned from her, embracing her from behind. Her hands braided Yan Ciwei’s waist-length black hair, coiling the smooth, fragrant locks at the back of her head. Then she locked her arms tightly around her waist, pressing her head against her shoulder.

“Weiwei… Sister,” An Chixu whispered softly, slowly fumbling with Yan Ciwei’s buttons. The pajamas she had seen countless times now felt foreign. She seemed blind, tracing them dozens of times before barely finding the position of the buttons. Her hand started from the very bottom. As she unbuttoned the shirt, her sleeve intentionally or unintentionally brushed against Yan Ciwei’s waist and abdomen.

Yan Ciwei tilted her head against hers, her breath lightly grazing the tip of her nose, making her lashes itch. An Chixu was still as well-behaved as a kitten, diligently pecking at her foster mother’s neck. Only, two years had passed, and she had long since grown into a cheetah. However, having been tamed in her youth, she remained gentle even as she grew up, always crouching at her owner’s feet, asking for a few caresses or a bit of milk.

At this moment, she was merely being led by Yan Ciwei to unfasten that layer of barrier, to meet her with absolute honesty, and then to serve her.

“Good Tuantuan,” Yan Ciwei’s hand covered the back of An Chixu’s hand in silent encouragement. With a single movement, she guided the inexperienced An Chixu to explore. She possessed An Chixu’s entire world, leaving only herself. She used herself to teach An Chixu what desire and seeking meant.

“Do you like it?” Yan Ciwei remembered the words she had said when An Chixu raised her hand.

Do you like it?

Yan Ciwei was cruelly pushed back to reality by the vibration of her phone. The hand she had placed by her side slowly rose. Just now, she had actually…

Perhaps the longing was too heavy, overflowing into a river. Yan Ciwei withdrew her hand and, in silence, used her dry hand to pick up the phone. During the five minutes she had spent in a daze, the person on the other side had sent her a flood of messages as if they were going crazy.

Yan Ciwei’s eyes grew slightly cold; her emotions felt hollow. At this moment, she didn’t know how to hope. If the person on the other side was An Chixu, her jealousy would erupt into a torrent. If not, then what was the point of all the effort she spent opening a new account and adding Pei Yuxi to act this out?

Yan Ciwei never did useless work. Yet, because of the other person’s attitude toward the cat, she felt a twinge of jealousy.

Five minutes ago, the message Yan Ciwei sent was very short: “Purring constantly? Is there a problem with the respiratory system?”

And the suspected An Chixu cat-boarder, upon seeing this sentence, began a message bombardment. The phrase “What should I do” was sent ten times, followed by a string of apologies.

This was not her Tuantuan.

This wasn’t An Chixu’s way of speaking. She was introverted and quiet; if something happened, she would only shrink into a corner and cry by herself. Or, she would tell her—Yan Ciwei—her only lover. She would always solve things for her, handling them perfectly every time. That was why An Chixu had once loved her so much. How could her Tuantuan send so many messages to a stranger, expressing her feelings so directly?

Yan Ciwei looked at the unfamiliar tone with boredom and clicked on the new video. It’s just a cat…

Yan Ciwei pinched her hand and looked carefully at the screen. This cat looked incredibly healthy. Pei Yuxi had raised it well; it wasn’t delicate, so how could it fall seriously ill the day after changing environments?

“I misspoke. The cat is fine. Relax.” Yan Ciwei sent a perfunctory sentence and switched accounts.

An Chixu looked at the messages sent by “Pei Yuxi” and felt a bit reflective. When they had communicated face-to-face before, she hadn’t felt that this younger sister was so cold. Online, however, she had become aloof, seemingly not caring much for her beloved Orange, even getting it wrong about whether there was a problem.

An Chixu ended her half-hour of anxiety, remembering that she had to rely on herself now and couldn’t let her emotions drown out her actions. She no longer had a “Sister” who could solve any trouble for her.

An Chixu opened a search engine. A few minutes later, she closed her phone with a flushed face.

It turned out that a cat purring was a sign of relaxation and closeness. What on earth had she been asking… Looking back at “Pei Yuxi’s” words now, An Chixu saw a faint sense of joking. No wonder she didn’t tell her; only she could get something so basic wrong.

“Orange… can I hold you?” An Chixu felt a sudden loneliness. The taste of being alone was too bitter; luckily, she had the company of a small animal. Even if it was someone else’s cat.

Orange hadn’t gone anywhere; seeing An Chixu reach out, she stood up again to rub against An Chixu’s hand.

“You’re so cute.” An Chixu grew a bit bolder, placing her palm on Orange’s back. Orange jumped up to headbutt An Chixu’s head, and after bumping a couple of times, she crawled into An Chixu’s lap.

“I should buy you a cat tree, little girl.” The only cat supply An Chixu had forgotten to buy was a cat tree. Seeing how agile Orange was, she probably really needed one.

And Orange pressed against her chest, standing up to meet her eyes. The cat had Persian-blue eyes, melancholic and elegant. When they made eye contact, An Chixu always had a delusion, as if she were looking at a person. Pei Luochen had a pair of eyes like this. An Chixu had a preference for exotic blue.

The next moment, the cat lay down and, like a human embrace, hugged An Chixu.

“…Hold me again.” An Chixu’s heart ached. She still couldn’t be like Yan Ciwei—a guide, a controller. Even a kitten that wasn’t afraid of strangers could easily take the initiative from her. Proactively getting close to her, embracing her. An Chixu didn’t have a shred of overbearingness; it was a pity that from beginning to end, she only ever wanted a pure, loving embrace.

Orange hugged her temporary “poop scooper,” kissing and rubbing against her.

A phone call interrupted An Chixu’s interaction with her new kitten.

“…” She reached out to answer, and after hearing the news, her breath caught halfway.

There was trouble with the group she had planned. The leader and a member had broken their public personas due to inappropriate comments. She had to go work overtime.

An Chixu set Orange down, poured her a scoop of cat food, hurriedly changed her clothes, and left. Although she wasn’t the persona planner for the leader Pei Luochen or the member in trouble, this incident would definitely require a scapegoat. Perhaps it would fall on the “sister” she was managing.

Shen Jibai’s popularity within the team had always been low, and the “CP” (couple pairing) she was bundled with for hype was completely dead. Sometimes An Chixu accompanied them to promotional events; seeing her few fans, she would feel heartach—therefore, she tried to give her a better persona with the least amount of change possible, but the results were negligible.

Perhaps it would even require An Chixu to take the blame.

An Chixu rolled her eyes. Who said this persona was written by her? When the persona proposal was submitted, the name stuck clearly on the cover was Tang Shu’s.

An Chixu made her decision.

Before arriving, An Chixu looked at the PR team’s methods and found that the comments were being controlled and the trending topics had been removed. But the video was clearly released by a rival; they wouldn’t let them off so easily.

An Chixu followed Tang Shu into the meeting room; the atmospheric pressure inside was very low. Pei Luochen’s popularity was unmatched, and she was currently in an upward phase of her career, competing for magazine covers and her team was fighting for the venue of the next stage performance. These were all reasons for rivals to attack her. Clearly, the company would not give up on her.

An Chixu turned over the words she wanted to say in her mind. She was just waiting for someone at the meeting to point the finger at her.

She just didn’t expect it.

Entering the meeting room, An Chixu looked up. She met Yan Ciwei’s eyes.

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