Finding the Shape of Love - Chapter 7

And so, I managed to survive the crisis unscathed.

Whew, I was worried about how things would turn out, but Koume turned out to be a much nicer girl than I expected. She even forgave me for almost breaking up with her just because I was told to. And Yoko, even though her lie was exposed, probably won’t throw a tantrum and insist we break up now that things have come to this. All’s well that ends well. Everything’s resolved, I’d say.

I’ll still be dating Koume, and as for Yoko, even though her feelings have changed, I won’t do anything beyond keeping a certain distance from her.

“Big sis, do you like that type?”

“Hmm. I don’t know. I think I like her quite a bit, but it’s not like we’re deeply in love yet. And even if we were, I’m not sure if it’s because she’s that type.”

On the way home, Yoko asked with a serious face, so I answered honestly, but since I don’t really have a clear answer, it ended up sounding evasive.

I mean, isn’t figuring out your “type” something that comes from liking various people and noticing common traits among them? I can’t know my type when I haven’t even fallen in love yet.

Yoko looked exasperated by my reply.

“Big sis, why is your emotional intelligence below elementary school level?”

“On the contrary, did you think I was some kind of love expert?”

“…I thought maybe you were just dense because the other person was your sister.”

“Wait, really? Were you making some kind of moves on me?”

“No, not moves or anything like that… But you are dense. Way too dense.”

“Seriously?”

Even if she says that… But if anyone else asked me to hang out alone, I might think it was a date invitation, but if my sister says it, I’d just take it normally. I think that’s fine precisely because she’s my sister.

Besides, “below elementary school level”? I don’t want to hear that from someone who was literally an elementary schooler until recently. Even if I’ve lived far removed from romance, Yoko’s both looks and maturity are at elementary school level anyway.

I almost wanted to ask if throwing a screaming fit over someone getting a girlfriend counts as adult emotional intelligence, but she looked like she might cry so I held back. Well, even if Yoko is at elementary school level, that’s pretty much to be expected. That would be truly immature of me.

“Well, from now on, no matter what I do, I won’t let you think ‘it’s just because she’s my sister.'”

To me, silently keeping my complaints to myself, Yoko declared this with a determined expression.

Hmm. Just the day before yesterday she was so stubborn and selfish, but now she seems to have completely shifted to trying her best. Yoko’s not a bad kid, really.

She just flies off the handle momentarily, but she can actually listen to advice and reflect on herself. Romance isn’t a bad thing either, and I’d want to support her whoever she liked. Just not me, that’s the problem.

Well, even if it’s problematic, there’s nothing to be done about it.

“Speaking of which, you didn’t threaten to cry and tell our parents.”

“Ugh… Well, if they found out everything, it wouldn’t be your decision to break up, and you probably wouldn’t do it easily. Plus, if I became an obstacle that made your relationship more passionate, that would be trouble… If I actually did it, you’d really give up on me, wouldn’t you? I never seriously intended to do it anyway. Telling our parents would be embarrassing.”

“Ah, I’m really glad about that.”

Seriously, I was worried Yoko might go too far without restraint. The fact that she didn’t say it in front of Koume probably means she has some sense that it would be too cowardly from a third party’s perspective, and I doubted she’d bring it up later. But I’m really glad she wasn’t serious.

I haven’t done anything wrong, but if it seriously came to our parents separating and me being isolated, it would practically break up our family. Even without being told how to interact with my sister, just the thought would be burdensome, and even if no one thought anything of it, I’d probably regret it myself.

“…Sorry, yesterday was sudden, and I panicked and said horrible things without restraint. I love Mom and Dad too, so I won’t do anything that would cause trouble for them.”

“You’re causing trouble for me though.”

“You’re my big sis! Besides, I love you, so if you tell me that loving you is causing trouble, then maybe it is… But that can’t be helped, right…”

Yoko pouted, pushing out her lips. Ugh, come on. So, she’s reflecting on losing her temper and saying too much even though she didn’t mean it seriously. And aside from that, she doesn’t want me to deny her feelings for me themselves.

Well, the feelings themselves, I mean. It’s not like I made her feel that way, but Yoko probably didn’t decide to fall for me either. It would be cruel to blame her for that.

“…Well, I don’t mind being liked. But please, no more like yesterday.”

“…Yeah. I’m reflecting on it. From now on, I’ll work hard to make you see me as an individual person, to make you conscious of me in a way that you could come to like me.”

“…I see.”

I couldn’t tell her “good luck,” but telling her to stop feeling that way didn’t seem right either, so I just gave a vague response. Then we walked home in silence.

“Phew, I’m tired.”

“Mm. Big sis.”

“What?”

“Thanks for hanging out with me today.”

When we got home, Yoko thanked me with a slightly embarrassed, blunt expression that was unmistakably little-sister-like. Hmm, she really is a pain, but she’s a cute little sister—even the part about not being able to go buy underwear alone.

○

And so the weekend, full of unbelievable events, was finally coming to an end. Once I sleep, tomorrow it’s back to school—normally I’d dread it, but right now I’m even feeling relieved.

No matter what happens, time passes. Some things might resolve themselves given enough time. There’s a lot going on now, but people’s feelings change. There’s no guarantee Yoko or Koume will still like me tomorrow. Well, things will probably work out eventually.

I just got out of the bath, and it’s only 8:30. I didn’t sleep well last night, so maybe I’ll go to bed early, I thought, when my eyes fell on the bag hanging on the wall and I suddenly remembered. My handkerchief is still in my bag. I need to put it in the washing machine.

Handkerchief in hand, I doubled back to the bathroom. It serves as both a washroom and changing area, so I knocked first, waited a moment for a response, and when there was none, went in.

The sound of the shower came from the bath area. Yoko must be in there. I peered into the washing machine and… huh?

It’s fine that Yoko’s clothes are in there since she probably bathed after me, but something feels off. My shirt isn’t on top? Why?

“……”

Feeling creeped out, I gently reached in. Moving my own shirt aside, pushing Yoko’s shirt, pants, camisole, etc. away underneath is just the bottom of the machine. I was the first one in the bath, after all.

There are small items like socks, towels, and handkerchiefs, but my underwear isn’t there. I didn’t sweat much, so there aren’t larger items like pants or jackets either, and there are so few things in the machine that nothing could be hiding among them.

“……”

No way. That can’t be. Could something that ridiculous really happen? Maybe I just mistakenly didn’t put it in. I don’t remember throwing it in, but I just stuff things in haphazardly so I don’t really remember. Yeah. I thought, and peered around, but it’s not on the floor around the machine either.

There’s a ventilation window, but it opens to our property and there are screens. It’s not in a position where someone could enter anyway. Rather than someone breaking in just to steal underwear, the perverted girl right next door in the bathroom is far more suspicious.

But that… no way. Even if Yoko admitted to thinking about me every day, using someone else’s underwear is… that’s beyond perverted. That can’t be.

Hoping against hope, I flung open the door to the bathroom.

“Gah! Wha—aaaaah!?”

“……”

I gently closed the door. I didn’t see anything. I saw nothing. I didn’t see my real sister with my bra pressed against her face and my panties against her crotch.

Yes, because you shouldn’t peek into the bathroom without permission. Even if it’s your sister, you shouldn’t do that. I don’t do things like that.

“……”

I left the quiet bathroom behind. Well, I put my handkerchief in the washing machine too, so I’ll go back to my room and sleep. I should make sure not to forget to lock my door. After all, there seems to be an underwear thief lurking in this house.

“Hmm?”

When I returned to my room, my smartphone was blinking. For some reason, my sleepiness had vanished, so I opened it while lying on my bed. It was a message from Koume.

『Good evening, sorry for messaging at night. Starting tomorrow, if possible, I’d like to go to school together in the mornings too. Is that okay?』

What a devoted kouhai she is. My sister—no, nothing happened with my sister—but anyway, it feels cleansing.

I told her roughly what time I usually take the train from the nearest station. I didn’t want to pressure her, so we arranged to meet up if we happened to be on the same train.

『Thank you very much. I’m looking forward to tomorrow.』

My cheeks relaxed at her reply, full of excited hearts. She’s cute. I wish she were my sister. No deep meaning, though.

As the conversation wound down, I thought it was about time to sleep. Just as I put my phone down, perfectly timed, there was a knock on my door.

“Big sis, are you asleep?”

“I’m asleep.”

“…You’re awake though. Meanie.”

“Okay, okay, what is it?”

Click—the doorknob turned, but it just made a sound. Oh right, I locked it. I don’t usually lock it, so I consciously did it this time but forgot.

“…Why won’t you open it? Do you not even want to see my face anymore?”

I could hear her voice, on the verge of tears. Seriously, what a handful.

“Okay, okay. I’m opening it.”

Reluctantly, I got up and opened the door. What a pain to have to greet her every time. I wish there were a remote lock.

When I opened the door, Yoko was already half-crying. Ugh. Even though I haven’t done anything wrong, seeing that face makes me want to apologize. What a sneaky little sister.

Even though I opened the door, she just stared at me without moving, so I took her hand and sat her on my bed. She was wearing her favorite chick-patterned pajamas from last year—the very picture of an elementary schooler’s cute pajamas. It was hard to imagine her recent indecent behavior from how she looked now.

Her shoulders slumped dejectedly, and she kept glancing at my face. She’s acting spoiled. But this is really… “Don’t act spoiled” would be too harsh, wouldn’t it?

“So, what?”

“…Y-you saw, right? Earlier?”

“I didn’t see anything.”

“Huh?”

She probably asked after steeling herself, but I flashed a bright, cheerful smile and lightly denied it. Yoko looked bewildered. Now’s my chance! Press the advantage!

“Yoko, what are you joking about? Do you really think I’m the kind of big sister who would just open the bathroom door while my little sister is bathing?”

“Eh… D-don’t just pretend it didn’t happen, it’s okay. If you have something to say, say it. I know I was in the wrong…”

It didn’t work. Or rather, it wasn’t out of consideration, not wanting to treat Yoko like a criminal, but because I didn’t want to have a little sister like that, so I pretended not to see.

But now that things have come to this, it seems I can’t just pretend it didn’t happen. Fine. Let’s switch gears. How can we handle this with the least damage to both of us?

“Underwear is, well, sexy, right? I get it. Yeah, I understand the feeling. But actually using someone else’s is dirty, you know?”

“B-big sis’s isn’t dirty!”

“Thanks for the compliment. But that’s not the point. Anyway, let’s not do this anymore, okay?”

“…I’m sorry. Y-you hated it, right? It’s gross, right?”

She looked utterly dejected. It’s fine, I don’t mind. Let’s just be careful from now on, I thought, trying to brush it off, but it seemed Yoko’s feelings wouldn’t be brushed aside so easily.

Apparently, we need to have a proper, serious talk.

I decided to face this head-on. Yoko’s… extremely perverted side.