Drunk on Madness - Chapter 66

Aunt Fang and Pearl immediately knelt beside them. Aunt Fang spoke earnestly, “Your Highness, please calm your anger. The consort is with child and must not be startled. I beg you not to harm her or the imperial heir in her womb.”

Zhou Mingxuan’s heart burned with fury. As the favored son of heaven, he had never humbled himself or tread so carefully around anyone before.

Suppressing his rage with the last shred of his rationality, he released his grip on Li Xiang.

Zhou Mingxuan looked at the kneeling palace servants and slowly regained his composure. Once the hall was empty except for the two of them, his patience wore thin. “What must I do for you to forgive me?” he demanded.

Seeing her still cold and distant, he finally sneered, “Didn’t you also sleep with Su Mo? How many times did the two of you do it in that cave in Youzhou? I endured it all, yet you can’t tolerate even one slip from me? Why must you demand absolute fidelity from me?”

Li Xiang paled at his words. He was dredging up her past with Su Mo to justify his own wrongdoing.

She laughed, a bitter laugh at the guilt she had long buried in her heart, now callously exposed by him.

Some things, once done, could never be undone. Neither of them could move past it. They had both betrayed each other. “Is this how you want to treat me? To make things ‘fair,’ is that it?”

Her soft laughter only enraged him further. “Yes! What right do you have to that position? Even your status as consort was begged for by me. You lack even the most basic virtue of chastity, yet you dare make demands of me. Isn’t that a bit too tyrannical?”

The secret thoughts he had harbored spilled out as he vented his emotions. Proud as he was, his pride had been drenched in cold water time and again by her. Now, he was tired, tired of groveling for her affection.

Li Xiang turned away. Pregnancy had made her emotions fragile, prone to tears. She quickly wiped them away. “If that’s the case, Your Highness, why trouble yourself seeking forgiveness from someone as ‘impure’ as me?”

“You are the Crown Prince. There will be no shortage of noble ladies vying for your favor. There’s no need to force yourself, or me.”

Zhou Mingxuan’s hatred flared at her words. In a fit of rage, he swept all the dishes from the table onto the floor.

Gripping her gaze, he demanded, “Is this truly how you feel?”

Li Xiang stared into the depths of the palace walls, forcing a smile. “At this point, truth or falsehood no longer matters. Your Highness, please leave. I’m tired.”

With that, she turned away without another glance and retreated to her chamber, shutting the door behind her.

Zhou Mingxuan stood amidst the wreckage, his fury unspent. He kicked the overturned table and chairs before storming out.

By the next day, Qingyi had already heard the news from the palace servants.

When Li Xiang had been moved out of Shaoyang Courtyard, Qingyi had been indignant, wanting to plead her case to their parents, but Li Xiang had stopped her.

Now that her brother had publicly berated Li Xiang in front of the servants, Qingyi felt her sister-in-law had been wronged.

She deliberately brought along Yiyi and Shiqing, two little bundles of joy borrowed from the Empress. The four of them sat on the courtyard swing, chatting idly.

“Sister-in-law, don’t worry. No matter what happens in the future, you’ll always be the best sister-in-law in my heart. I won’t accept anyone else.”

Li Xiang couldn’t help but laugh at Qingyi’s childish words, though she sighed softly. “Yiyi, don’t call me sister-in-law anymore. When his official consort enters the palace, how will you explain yourself?”

Qingyi complained resentfully, “How is she worthy of me calling her sister-in-law? If it weren’t for her prominent family background, how could she possibly have such a hold over my brother?”

Li Xiang felt touched that Qingyi held such strong opinions about Chen Minying on her behalf, but she still advised her gently, “Yiyi, as a friend, I understand why you feel wronged on my behalf. Thank you for standing up for me. But women have it hard in this world, there’s nothing wrong with pursuing one’s own happiness.”

“I don’t blame her. Given your brother’s status, even if it weren’t her, there would inevitably be someone else. This era allows men to take multiple wives and concubines. Women have long been conditioned by these norms, so the concept of ‘interfering in someone else’s relationship’ doesn’t exist, it’s a product of the times.”

“Though, ironically, she and your brother were already betrothed. Who’s interfering with whom is hard to say.” Li Xiang smiled bitterly.

Zhou Qingyi was puzzled. “If you don’t blame her, then have you been avoiding my brother these past days because you blame him?”

Li Xiang opened her mouth slightly, pausing for a long moment before replying, “To say I don’t resent him would be a lie. Honestly, how many women can truly be magnanimous enough to share their man with others?”

“But I blame myself more.” She had known the abyss lay ahead, yet she had sunk deeper and deeper. She had brought this upon herself. For a fleeting moment, she regretted her impulsive decision to give up Su Mo for him.

The moment this thought surfaced, Li Xiang despised herself even more. It was utterly unfair to Su Mo, he wasn’t someone she could summon or dismiss at will whenever she felt wronged.

Once harm was done, there was no turning back.

She blamed herself for clinging to Zhou Mingxuan while still entangled with Su Mo. If only she had gone along with the mistake and left with Su Mo back then, it would have been better than the three of them now trapped in this quagmire, unable to escape.

She had gambled on love and lost. She accepted it. Everything was her own doing. She had fought for them both, there was nothing left to regret.

Li Xiang asked Qingyi to buy some vegetable seeds for her. She cleared a patch of land in the courtyard and sowed them. Without Qingyi’s company, Li Xiang had no desire to go out.

She spent her days holed up in Wanxiang Hall, either embroidering baby clothes, swinging on the swing, or watering and fertilizing her vegetables.

Aunt Fang had told her this child would be a girl, so she often talked to her belly in solitude. Without Zhou Mingxuan’s disturbances, her days passed peacefully. However, as time went on, the servants in her palace, seeing that the Crown Prince no longer visited while their mistress busied herself with gardening, gradually grew lax in their duties.

Li Xiang noticed but didn’t reprimand them. Everyone had their own path, she turned a blind eye and lived her life as she pleased.

She had no intention of entangling herself with Zhou Mingxuan again in the future. All she wanted was to stay quietly in the palace, raise her child, and find some small joys to pass the time. The thoughts of others were beyond her concern.

In the blink of an eye, the Crown Prince’s wedding arrived. Using her pregnancy as an excuse, Li Xiang secluded herself in Wanxiang Hall, refusing to attend. She sat alone beneath the locust tree, listening to the distant sounds of ceremonial music.

At that moment, she truly wished him a lifetime of happiness and peace, and that he would never come to disturb her again.