After Pretending to be an Idiot, I Was Targeted by the Cold-Blooded Zhangyin - Chapter 1

“Your Highness, are you quite alright?”

A soft, gentle call pulled Xie Changsheng’s drifting attention back to reality.

He blinked and looked at the palace maid. “Ah?”

The maid held a handkerchief, dabbing the water from Xie Changsheng’s forehead. “Your Highness, the Imperial Physician will arrive momentarily. This servant was asking—since you fell into the water, does your body feel unwell?”

Xie Changsheng blinked again. “What?”

The maid pursed her lips, a vein throbbing slightly in her forehead as she asked again: “Your Highness, does your body feel unwell?”

The moment the maid finished speaking, Xie Changsheng suddenly burst into loud laughter and began clapping his hands.

He possessed a superb physical appearance: skin as delicate and white as fine porcelain; a pair of “peach blossom” eyes full of affection, the outer corners slightly downturned; and thick, long hair, drenched from the fall into the water, clinging to his cheeks and scattering across his back.

He was a youth so beautiful it was breathtaking.

His attire was also exquisite, adorned with a multitude of colorful gemstone pendants that jingled with a crisp, pleasant melody following his movements.

And yet…

Despite being a beautiful picture, there was a jarring dissonance—his eyes.

They were dull, stagnant, and wooden, devoid of any emotion.

The maid was startled by Xie Changsheng’s sudden laughter and couldn’t help but take a step back. “Your… Your Highness…”

After calling out anxiously for a long time and seeing Xie Changsheng laughing incessantly, the maid stomped her foot and rushed out.

“The Imperial Physician… when will the Imperial Physician arrive?! His Highness… His Highness is not right!”

Chaos erupted at the palace gates. Xie Changsheng heard someone muttering softly to themselves: “…It couldn’t be, could it? Has he gone mad?…”

Xie Changsheng blinked, gradually withdrawing his smile and sitting up straight.

Of course, he wasn’t a fool. In reality, he was merely pretending to be one.

The situation was as follows:

The current Xie Changsheng was not actually the original Prince Xie Changsheng. He was a transmigrator.

He had gone from being a “clear and foolish” drama student in the 21st century to inhabiting this small Imperial Prince in a book titled Storm of the Throne. He had landed in the body of someone with the same name, same surname, and even the same appearance.

In this book, the original host had relied on the fact that the old Emperor favored him most to act like a total tyrant. One day he would curse his brother the Crown Prince, the next he would beat the Young Marquis, and the day after that, he would bind the Zhangyin (Head Eunuch) to humiliate him relentlessly.

He was a textbook cannon-fodder villain.

Back when he was reading the book, every time he saw this “Xie Changsheng” acting up, he was so angry he wanted to go straight to the police station to change his own name. When he finally read the part where the original host was collectively tortured to death by the others, he was so satisfied he added an extra serving of ribs to his dinner.

Little did he expect the tables to turn. He had actually become the little villain Xie Changsheng from the book.

He had one year left. Once the old Emperor died of illness, he would meet his demise.

Xie Changsheng had a breakdown. He didn’t want to die.

Wrapped in his quilt, he pondered for an entire day before finally thinking of a way out.

He would feign idiocy.

Utilizing his decent acting skills, he would pretend to be a fool. A half-insane simpleton who stayed aloof from world affairs and no longer posed a threat to anyone.

In ancient times, Goujian and Zhu Di had feigned madness to escape death. He would do the same.

To make the act more convincing, just moments ago, under the pretext of taking a walk, he had pretended to lose his footing and tumbled into the lotus pond.

Since returning, he had sat dazed in his seat for a long time, refusing to let anyone wash or dress him. His behavior was bizarre.

Judging by the mutterings of the maid he just heard, Xie Changsheng’s “idiot plan” was showing its first signs of success.

After sitting for another ten minutes, Xie Changsheng heard hurried footsteps outside.

Looking back, several old men with white beards carrying medicine chests arrived in a rush.

“Your Highness, we heard you fell into the water. Does your body feel any discomfort? May this old official step forward to examine Your Highness…”

The speaker was an Imperial Physician named Chang Nianping, fifty-nine years of age.

Although he heard that Xie Changsheng had only been submerged for a brief moment before being quickly fished out, Chang Nianping was still breaking into a cold sweat. He was one of the top physicians in the Imperial Academy and had been specifically assigned by the old Emperor to oversee the health of his favorite youngest son.

Members of the Imperial family had bodies worth a thousand gold; they could catch a chill just by washing their hands, let alone taking a dip in cold water. If anything happened to Xie Changsheng, Chang Nianping’s life might not be preserved.

Just as he was trembling with fear, he heard Xie Changsheng’s voice: “Fine, come here.”

He sounded full of vigor, seemingly even healthier than before.

Chang Nianping stepped forward and placed his hand on Xie Changsheng’s pulse. The breath was steady, and the pulse was strong. There wasn’t much of an ailment.

However, remembering the little maid who had grabbed him before he entered, tearfully saying the Prince’s mind seemed to have failed, he felt he could not relax.

Taking a deep breath, Chang Nianping asked, “Does Your Highness have any discomfort?”

“My head… it hurts a little,” Xie Changsheng said.

Chang Nianping was startled again. One must know that Xie Changsheng usually addressed himself as “This Prince,” never as “I.”

He couldn’t help but believe half of the maid’s words. Seeing the physician waver, Xie Changsheng pressed his advantage.

He suddenly stood up abruptly, grabbed a paperweight from the table, and hurled it at a nearby half-height flower vase.

With a sharp crack, the vase shattered across the floor. The physicians and maids were shocked. Chang Nianping and the others, thinking Xie Changsheng was merely having another sudden tantrum, hurriedly knelt on the ground.

“Your Highness, this official knows—”

Just as he was about to admit fault, he saw Xie Changsheng run past him. Looking back, he saw the youth pounce onto the floor. Those porcelain-white hands grabbed several shards of the vase and were about to shove them into his mouth.

Chang Nianping: “…!!”

Terrified, the sixty-year-old man transformed into a sprinting champion, lunging forward to restrain Xie Changsheng.

“Your Highness! What are you doing?!”

“I’m eating something delicious,” Xie Changsheng said. Falling to the floor with hands full of sharp shards didn’t seem to hurt him. He giggled foolishly, offering a shard toward Chang Nianping’s mouth: “It’s delicious, hurry and eat. If you eat it, you’ll become smart.”

The physicians and maids crowded around Xie Changsheng, coaxing and pleading with him until he finally dropped the porcelain shards.

As they helped him sit on the couch, seeing Xie Changsheng laughing incessantly, Chang Nianping was already eighty to ninety percent convinced. However, he couldn’t rashly make a diagnosis.

He cautiously approached Xie Changsheng. “Your Highness, may this old official ask you a few questions?”

Xie Changsheng blinked. “Ask away.”

“Your Highness, when you fell into the water, did you hit your head?”

“Head?” Xie Changsheng reached out and touched the back of his head. “It hurts so much.”

“This old official understands… Your Highness, why did you say those shards were delicious? Did Your Highness truly wish to eat them?”

“I want to eat food; people get hungry if they don’t eat.”

Hearing Xie Changsheng’s nonsensical, “horse-jaw-to-cow-head” answers, Chang Nianping asked further: “Your Highness, do you still remember who you are? Do you remember how old you are? Can you name ten people you remember?”

“I am Xie Changsheng, I am seventeen years old.”

“I know Marx, David Copperfield, Leonardo, Michael Jackson, Charlie Chaplin…”

The physicians and maids looked at each other, utterly bewildered.

A physician standing at the end of the line asked, “Do any of you recognize the people His Highness is mentioning?”

“No… no… not a single one…”

As if he hadn’t heard them, Xie Changsheng continued to rattle off a string of strange names. At the very end, he suddenly became jubilant. Under the terrified gazes of the maids and physicians, he leapt down from the bed.

“Hahahahaha!! Like-charges repel, opposites attract! If in doubt, choose ‘C’! The dark side of a light surface cannot be brighter than the light side of a dark surface! If they are both large, take the larger one; if they are both small, take the smaller! Hahahahaha!! Good, good, good! Newton is good! Apples are good! Gravity is good!”

“What did you say?”

Inside a room filled with a fragrant aroma, Chang Nianping bowed deeply, his voice trembling.

“Answering the Zhangyin,” Chang Nianping said, his voice shaking: “This humble official is saying that the Little Highness… has gone mad.”

The figure that had been standing with its back to him finally turned around.

This person possessed a gorgeous physical form and a face as refined and ethereal as a celestial being. Yet, a faint, inscrutable smile gave him an air of unpredictable gloom.

This man was the Zhangyin Eunuch, Gu Feiyi.

“You say he is mad…” Gu Feiyi’s voice was not sharp like other eunuchs; instead, it was soft and slightly deep.

“Are you absolutely certain?” Gu Feiyi asked.

Chang Nianping replied: “…This humble official has diagnosed him. The Little Highness laughs and cries uncontrollably, his memory is a mess, and he even attempted to eat shards of a flower vase.”

“Furthermore, this official has heard that those who are simple-minded often speak in languages that others cannot understand.”

Recalling the “Heavenly Script” that Xie Changsheng had uttered—words that made one’s head throb just by hearing them—Chang Nianping said firmly:

“It is absolutely certain! The Little Highness has, without a doubt, gone mad!”