After Failing To Tame The Scumbag - Chapter 5

“I won’t mention it again.”

Yun Chuxiu put down her phone and glanced at her, her tone devoid of much emotion. “There seem to be simpler ways to achieve such a goal.”

“…Is that so?” Ji Jin avoided the subject, instead reaching out to hand over her phone, which she had been holding beside her. She presented it to Yun Chuxiu and said, “If someone does something wrong, they should be punished. I’ve already collected the debt from them on your behalf, Xiu. As for my share of the blame, you can do whatever you want with me.”

The phone screen emitted a faint glow. Yun Chuxiu scanned it briefly, skipping over the words of apology and begging with a lack of interest, not bothering to think about what Ji Jin had done behind the scenes.

That wasn’t the point.

Yun Chuxiu gave Ji Jin a light kick. Looking into those cautious and uneasy eyes, she suddenly felt an indescribable sense of powerlessness.

“I forgive you,” she said, waving her own phone. Right in front of Ji Jin, she deleted the eight-minute-long recording. Her eyes remained cool, but her voice softened considerably. “I won’t mention the past again. But Ji Jin, you won’t get another chance.”

Ji Jin gave a muffled response, resting her head on Yun Chuxiu’s lap while her hands, which were hugging Yun Chuxiu’s calves, inched slightly forward.

Yun Chuxiu looked down and stroked the fluffy head in front of her. Her lips moved slightly as if to speak, but in the end, she said nothing. She simply stared into the distance, her thoughts drifting away.

“…There are indeed some problems between us.”

Inside a quiet private booth, Yun Chuxiu looked at Lin Xing who was acting guilty yet remained stubbornly silent and tapped the table helplessly to bring her back to reality.

Lin Xing let out a short “Ah,” rubbed her face, and without even listening to what Yun Chuxiu had said, lowered her voice and apologized first: “I’m sorry, Sister Xiu. I didn’t mean to make such a scene.”

The things those people said had made her blood boil. If she hadn’t guessed that it might have been an arrangement by Jiang Fanyin, she wouldn’t have been able to resist snapping back at them.

“Those people…”

“It’s okay,” Yun Chuxiu interrupted her explanation with a reassuring smile. “I know your intentions were for my sake.”

Regarding this younger sister she had picked up from the streets halfway through life, Yun Chuxiu knew she had no ill intent. Because of that, she couldn’t bring herself to scold or intimidate her.

She pushed a beautiful dessert forward and said, “Mango flavor. You used to love it.”

Lin Xing rubbed her eyes, unable to control her emotions any longer. “Sister Xiu, I didn’t think you’d still remember… When you took me home from the street back then, that’s what you brought me.”

“Back then, you didn’t even know how to cry when you were wronged. I asked you for a long time, and you only said you wanted mango cake,” Yun Chuxiu said with a gentle gaze. “I’ve never forgotten. It’s just that lately, work has been piling up at ‘Yun Jian,’ and I haven’t been able to look after you.”

“I made a mistake and Sister Xiu still has to comfort me, honestly…” Lin Xing took a bite of the dessert. With the spoon still in her mouth, tears began to pool in her eyes. She choked up, complaining to no one in particular: “Sister Xiu is such a good person; she should get everything she wants.”

How could Ji Jin, how dared she fail such sincere devotion time and time again…

“It doesn’t work that way,” Yun Chuxiu said, the smile on her face fading slightly as she sensed the resentment in Lin Xing’s heart. “Eight or nine times out of ten, life doesn’t go as planned. Besides, both consent and refusal are her rights. If I forced her to follow my every whim, I’d truly deserve the reputation of being a control freak.”

“But she keeps clinging to you like nothing happened after she pushes you away,” Lin Xing pouted, completely unconvinced. Her resentment only grew. “Sister Xiu, you clearly want to start a family of your own, right? Why are you acting like you’re possessed, indulging her again and again?”

Yun Chuxiu froze for a moment, her smile stiffening.

Lin Xing didn’t look at her, intent on laying out all the frustration she had suppressed for so long. She continued, “She’s a rich second-generation heir, but Sister Xiu, you built your own brand from scratch!”

“Because she keeps dodging the issue, you have no idea how horribly those young masters and socialites talk about you! Why should they? Clearly”

“Don’t cry,” Yun Chuxiu stood up and pulled out a tissue to wipe Lin Xing’s tears. She had been feeling a bit down herself, but looking at those swollen, tearful eyes, she was left with nothing but helplessness. “I know you’re worried about me, but the matters between her and me aren’t something that can be explained in simple terms.”

“I know everything you’ve said,” Yun Chuxiu sighed, a flash of complex emotion appearing in her eyes before quickly returning to a calm state. She looked down at Lin Xing’s clenched hands beneath the table and said calmly, “Lin Xing, you should trust me a bit more. At the very least, I am not afraid of failure.”

“Just as you said, I came out of an orphanage. Everything I have, I earned myself. It won’t be easily taken away.”

Ji Jin simply refused to get married.

That, too, was a mutual choice.

Yun Chuxiu fell silent for a moment, glancing at her phone which was constantly lighting up despite being on silent. A faint, ambiguous smile touched her face. “…Things are fine as they are now.”

Is that really true?

Lin Xing ate her dessert in silence. Her mind was still a mess, but her heart had involuntarily quieted down.

“I’ll find a chance to apologize to Ji Jin,” Lin Xing promised in a muffled voice. After a pause, she added with a childish streak, “But not right now.”

“…If I saw her right now, I wouldn’t be able to say anything nice.”

Yun Chuxiu agreed. After confirming that Lin Xing’s mood had returned to normal, she picked up her phone which was still buzzing with messages and prepared to go out and settle the bill.

“A-Xiu.”

The moment the door opened, Ji Jin’s mournful voice squeezed through the gap.

Not wanting her to see Lin Xing’s distressed state, Yun Chuxiu had to pull her away. After walking a short distance, she asked expressionlessly, “According to the schedule, you should be at the company right now.”

“I sent you messages,” Ji Jin pointed to Yun Chuxiu’s phone and shrugged innocently. “You ignored me and rejected my lunch invitation. I was worried.”

Yun Chuxiu didn’t fall for it, but seeing the unconcealable anxiety on Ji Jin’s face, her heart softened anyway. “I told you before I left that I had an appointment with Lin Xing and couldn’t have lunch with you… there was no need to worry.”

“Ah, did you say that? I might have been too busy looking at you to notice!” Nonsense, she thought. It was precisely because the appointment was with Lin Xing that she needed to worry!

Given Lin Xing’s attitude toward her, who knew what she would say during such a long period of one-on-one time with Yun Chuxiu!

Ji Jin blinked, continuing to play dumb. “A-Xiu, I already settled the bill for you guys. After paying, I just waited here for you. I haven’t even had lunch yet.”

Yun Chuxiu: “.”

Yun Chuxiu was too tired to call her out on her obvious excuses. “Let’s go then. That restaurant you like happens to be nearby.”

Ji Jin naturally took her hand and pulled her into the car before asking, “Are you going to stay with me, Xiu?”

Yun Chuxiu: “…”

Yun Chuxiu pinched her face as she leaned in. “Are you still a child? Do you need someone to accompany you just to eat a meal?”

Ji Jin turned her body toward her. Without saying a word, she simply stared at her intently.

Yun Chuxiu pressed a hand to her forehead, utterly defeated by her. “…Fine, let’s go.”

Ji Jin arched an eyebrow, a slightly triumphant smile spreading across her face.

The heavy rain that had been falling for a long time finally stopped as noon approached.

Flashes of sunlight glinted off the damp road. Ji Jin was the first to push the car door open. The sapphire around her neck swayed, shimmering like the surface of a flowing sea.

The two walked inside together. After ordering with practiced familiarity, Yun Chuxiu took a sip of water, calmly opened her messages, and placed her phone openly on the table.

In the span of less than three hours since they had been apart, the chat box under Ji Jin’s name was already stuffed with over thirty messages, the list seemed endless.

Ji Jin tactically picked up her glass, and even though she realized it was empty, she didn’t put it down. She said evasively, “I just… didn’t want you to worry about me, Xiu.”

“I’m not blaming you,” Yun Chuxiu pinched the bridge of her nose, a real headache starting to form this time. “Ji Jin, I know you haven’t quite recovered from what happened before, but you should also know that not every little thing needs to be reported to me.”

When she was in a meeting, when she was too busy to check messages, even when she left the office to pick something up, she sent a text for everything.

Looking at these, Yun Chuxiu didn’t feel the peace of mind that comes with having everything under control instead, she glimpsed the unspeakable guilt and anxiety within Ji Jin.

It always seemed to be this way: the moment Ji Jin felt she had done something wrong, her attitude became cautious and timid. If an argument was unfortunately added to the mix, her uncontrollable insecurity became even more glaring, impossible to hide.

This was not a good sign. Yun Chuxiu looked at her calmly, realizing with absolute clarity the imbalance in their relationship.

“Ji Jin, what exactly are you afraid of?” she asked.

“…Nothing,” Ji Jin bit her lip and closed her eyes. A polite smile was forced onto her face as she tried her best to mask any potential loss of composure. “I just want you to feel more at ease, Xiu.”

Yun Chuxiu frowned, her voice rising in confusion: “Hmm?”

“You’re always trying to stay ahead of every change because I haven’t given you enough security, right?” Ji Jin quietly squeezed her knuckles. She paused for a moment, then leaned in further, putting on an air of effortless ease. She feigned helplessness as she said, “It’s my fault for making your desire for control grow so heavy. Of course, I have to make some changes. After all, I am your closest girlfriend. I can’t fail in my duties, no matter what.”

“…”

Yun Chuxiu fell silent. She leaned back, took a deep breath, and calmly suppressed certain emotions that were on the verge of erupting.

After a long silence, under Ji Jin’s increasingly apprehensive gaze, she laughed.

“So it was just a desire for control… It was actually only a desire for control,” Yun Chuxiu murmured under her breath. She tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear and let out a silent, bitter laugh.

Looking at her smile, Ji Jin’s vision suddenly blurred. It was as if an alarm had been triggered, her perception of time slowed down to an infinite crawl.

Her heart felt as if it were being squeezed, a wave of sharp pain washing through her.

“Xiu, don’t be like this, it’s me…” It was me who said the wrong thing, me who had such an excessive avoidant reaction…

Ji Jin felt as if sharp barbs had grown on the tip of her tongue. She wanted to open her mouth to explain, but she tasted the metallic blood of her own wounds first. In that moment of daze, she completely lost her chance to speak.

“You’re right.” Everything Ji Jin wanted to vaguely avoid, Yun Chuxiu understood perfectly.

She knew. “Desire for control” wasn’t necessarily the truth in Ji Jin’s heart. This lady, so accustomed to running away, was simply too ashamed to utter words related to “refusing marriage,” yet she craved for Yun Chuxiu to be “understanding” to never again bring up that blood-stained, blunt knife.

One man’s meat is another man’s poison.

She had always thought it was just a matter of time, but looking back now, the signs had been there all along.

They had simply been deliberately ignored. Her repeated attempts and persistence, the moments she thought she and Ji Jin shared a tacit understanding… it was all devastatingly ridiculous.

“I won’t mention it again,” Yun Chuxiu exhaled. Looking at the table separating them, she suddenly felt very, very tired.