After a Flash Marriage with a Professor - Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Guilt

Before her blind date, Yan Mingshu had played out over a hundred different scenarios in her head. The one she thought about most was that a professor with such excellent credentials must also have some kind of difficulty, just like her, that required her to find a partner through a dating service.

But when she looked up, her gaze passing over the semi-transparent green glass table and the two green orchids leaning against each other in a slender-necked vase, her brain felt like a smart appliance that had suddenly short-circuited. She saw Professor Shen seated across from her, smiling gently.

Could a person like Professor Shen possibly have a difficulty she couldn’t overcome?

Shen Junlan was in no rush. Her smile was warm, and she patiently waited for Yan Mingshu to process her shock and fear.

They hadn’t interacted much when Yan Mingshu was in school. As Shen Junlan thought about it, she recalled that every time they met, Yan Mingshu had seemed nervous and unsettled.

Just then, a server who had been observing them for a moment approached. With his hands clasped in front of him, he smiled and asked if they would like to order.

Shen Junlan nodded and looked down at the menu. She always ordered the same thing at this restaurant. However, because the young woman across from her hadn’t yet composed herself, Shen Junlan looked at the menu for a little longer. After about two minutes, she turned the menu around and handed it to Yan Mingshu, gesturing for her to order.

Yan Mingshu was trembling. Discovering that her blind date was her former university professor had left her completely flustered. She even wanted to flee the awkward situation immediately, but her physical exhaustion and the image of Mr. Huang’s oily, jowly face stopped her.

Could she really go on a date with Professor Shen?

She could. They hadn’t been student and teacher for over a year now.

It took Yan Mingshu five minutes to convince herself. When she finally mustered the courage to look up, Professor Shen asked her with a smile, “Mingshu, is it alright if I call you that?”

It felt like being back in the classroom, with the professor’s gaze fixed on her alone. Yan Mingshu straightened her back rigidly and folded her hands on her lap, clutching the edge of her white dress. She told herself not to look down, that it would be rude, but her eyes instinctively dropped anyway.

“Y-yes… it’s fine.”

“You seem very nervous, Mingshu.”

“I…” Yan Mingshu didn’t know what to say. She had never had a one-on-one conversation with a teacher outside of school like this.

“Relax, don’t be nervous.” Shen Junlan leaned forward slightly and chuckled softly. “You’ve graduated, so we’re no longer student and teacher. Or perhaps my clothes today make you feel constrained?”

“No, no, no… it’s my problem.” Yan Mingshu was on the verge of tears. She truly didn’t know how to face Professor Shen, who was now wearing a dark blue shirt.

Even though she had graduated, in her mind, Professor Shen was still her teacher, and she was still the student. How could she make that thought disappear?

Yan Mingshu looked down at her clenched hands, completely surprised that Professor Shen even remembered her.

“Mingshu, you seemed lost in thought, so I took the liberty of ordering a sirloin steak for you. The menu is in front of you. Take a look and see if you’d like anything else.” Professor Shen’s voice was still gentle, with no hint of impatience at Yan Mingshu’s panicked and flustered state.

Feeling a little calmer, Yan Mingshu looked up slightly and saw a menu. She didn’t know when it had been placed there. Her eyes landed on the prices, which were mostly in the four-digit range, and her heart jumped.

“Drinks are on the back,” Shen Junlan reminded her.

Yan Mingshu’s hands were still clutching her dress. She stiffly released her grip, raised one hand, and turned the menu over. The drinks weren’t cheap either; they were in the three-digit range.

“One steak is enough, thank you, Professor Shen.” Yan Mingshu pulled her hand back and hid it under the table to smooth out the wrinkles in her skirt.

Shen Junlan noticed the strangeness in Yan Mingshu’s voice, which was a little raspy. She gestured to a waiter and asked for a cup of monk fruit herbal tea. The waiter immediately went to the kitchen to relay the order.

Yan Mingshu looked up, confused. She didn’t remember that drink being on the menu. She glanced at the menu again; it wasn’t there.

“My friend owns this restaurant. It’s not difficult to ask her to make a tea they don’t have on the menu.”

The voice came from across the table. Professor Shen was explaining it to her? Yan Mingshu was slightly surprised but didn’t know how to respond.

Just as she was at her wits’ end, the server brought out two plates of steak, one cooked medium-rare and the other well-done.

“Mingshu, which one would you like?”

“The well-done one,” Yan Mingshu answered, her voice still very hoarse. She turned her head, covered her mouth with her hand, and coughed lightly.

“I apologize. I was too eager, and I made you come out even though you’re not feeling well.” Shen Junlan looked apologetic.

“It’s not your fault, Professor Shen. I might have been more eager than you were,” Yan Mingshu said, lowering her head in embarrassment.

Shen Junlan remembered the specially marked form and looked at the young woman who couldn’t even raise her head. Her heart suddenly softened. She reached out and took the forgotten steak from in front of the girl, picked up her fork and knife, and began to carefully cut the entire piece of steak into smaller bites.

Even though they were only seven years apart in age, Shen Junlan felt like it was more than that. Was it because she had been the young woman’s professor?

Shen Junlan shook her head and smiled.

When the steak was cut, she placed the plate in front of the young woman, who was too nervous to look up and didn’t know what to do with her hands and feet. With a gentle smile, she said, “Mingshu, eat something first. We can talk after.”

Yan Mingshu saw Professor Shen hand her the white porcelain plate with the steak already cut into small pieces. She looked at the professor’s long, slender fingers on the edge of the plate, as white and beautiful as jade. She was momentarily dazed, then she anxiously stood up.

“What’s wrong, Mingshu?” Shen Junlan asked.

“I…” Yan Mingshu was too embarrassed to say it was because she was so overwhelmed that Professor Shen had cut her steak for her.

Shen Junlan took a white napkin and dabbed the corner of her mouth, her smile gentle. “Do you need to use the restroom?”

Even though she didn’t, Yan Mingshu nodded gratefully. For someone with such severe social anxiety, any other blind date would not have had the patience Professor Shen was showing.

“The restroom is over there. Just follow the signs.” Shen Junlan gestured with her hand.

“Thank you, Professor Shen,” Yan Mingshu said before hurrying away as if her life depended on it.

After Yan Mingshu left, Shen Junlan paused her meal to quietly reflect on everything she knew about Yan Mingshu, trying to learn a little more about her from her memories.

“Professor Shen, what are you thinking about? You’re so lost in thought.”

“Yu Le, why did you bring the drinks yourself?” Shen Junlan hadn’t expected her friend, the restaurant owner, to personally deliver the beverages. He was even wearing a white uniform like the servers. Something felt off. She slightly raised her chin and said, “Put it across from me. It’s not for me to drink.”

“Tsk, tsk, tsk, Professor Shen…” Yu Le stood with his arms crossed, one foot planted firmly on the ground and the other on its heel, its toe pointed up. He had a look of wild abandon, not at all like the owner of a high-end Western restaurant, but more like a playful and reckless troublemaker.

“Are you here to watch the show?”

“I’m here to care about Professor Shen’s lifelong happiness. How can you say I’m watching a show?” Yu Le said with a grin, his small, narrow eyes squinting into slits. “To make it seem less obvious, I even changed into an employee uniform. What do you think, am I a good friend or what?”

Shen Junlan just looked at him.

She and Yu Le had met while studying abroad in the US. Among their group of students, they had the closest relationship, which everyone found strange because their personalities were completely different. One was excessively formal, and the other was overly uninhibited. The fact that two such people could become friends was truly shocking.

“Professor Shen, don’t be so stingy. My staff told me your blind date was incredibly gorgeous, so I couldn’t help but come over to take a look. I promise I won’t steal her from you. Be more generous!” Yu Le used his ultimate weapon: he started to flirt with Shen Junlan.

Yu Le’s voice was androgynous, so his flirting was very awkward. As he deliberately put on a sickly sweet, fake voice to flirt with Shen Junlan, she immediately raised her hands to cover her ears.

The ear-piercing sound finally stopped.

“Don’t scare her,” Shen Junlan said, feeling a headache coming on.

“Huh? Scare her?” Yu Le asked, confused. “She’ll be scared if I just peek at her?”

Shen Junlan fell silent. She didn’t know how to accurately describe Yan Mingshu to Yu Le. They didn’t know each other well enough yet.

She just felt that Yan Mingshu… that Yan Mingshu was…

She couldn’t find the right words to describe her.

A sudden sense of guilt washed over her. She felt like she was taking advantage of her.

“I apologize, Professor Shen, for making you wait.”

Yan Mingshu had returned from the restroom and was walking softly back to her seat. She noticed a new server standing by their table, looking at her.

The moment Yan Mingshu looked up, Yu Le caught a clear glimpse of her face. He thought she looked like a jade-faced fox, but with a startled expression. She looked timid, and her thin shoulders even twitched a little as she shrank back, as if she was about to run away at any second.

No wonder Professor Shen was worried he’d scare her.

“She’s gorgeous, alright! You can do it, Professor Shen!” Yu Le turned his head and mouthed to Shen Junlan. Then he turned back to Yan Mingshu and said, “This is the monk fruit tea Professor Shen ordered specially for you. It’s good for your throat. Please, enjoy.”

Yan Mingshu nodded gently and thanked him again, her voice soft and sweet, making Yu Le’s heart flutter.

Yu Le also saw Yan Mingshu’s thick, long eyelashes lowered, and a faint blush on her cheeks. Her beauty was mesmerizing. He pressed a hand to his heart, which always beat so fast when he saw a beautiful woman, and thought that Professor Shen’s taste was truly sharp.

Yu Le turned to leave but couldn’t help but look back at Yan Mingshu twice. He told himself that the next time he saw this girl, he really needed to speak more softly. He had a feeling that even a slightly loud voice would startle her.

After Yan Mingshu returned to her seat, a new problem arose in her mind. She had specifically studied Western dining etiquette: fork in the left hand and knife in the right. But Professor Shen had already cut the steak for her. She only needed her fork, but holding the fork with just her left hand felt strange.

As she was fretting over this, she heard Professor Shen across from her say, “Don’t be so formal, Mingshu. This isn’t a business setting. Just pretend you’re having a meal with a friend and don’t overthink it.”

“Okay,” Yan Mingshu said, nodding gratefully. It was as if Professor Shen could read her mind and knew exactly what was bothering her.

She was now aware of Professor Shen’s attention and care, and she was able to stop feeling so overwhelmed.

Yan Mingshu lowered her head and imagined that she wasn’t sitting across from the kind and tolerant Professor Shen, but her friend Jiang Lingyu. She chose to use her right hand to hold the fork and began to carefully taste the four-digit steak. It was cooked to a perfect medium-well, tender and delicious. It was far better than any beef she bought at the market.

Yan Mingshu slowly chewed and finished the entire steak. She put down her silver fork, wiped her mouth with a white napkin, and looked up at Professor Shen, who was putting the last piece of steak into her mouth. She quickly averted her gaze.

A few seconds later, she heard the gentle sound of a fork being placed on a plate across from her.

What was coming couldn’t be avoided. Yan Mingshu looked up again, ready to tell Professor Shen everything she had rehearsed in the restroom. She wanted to explain her family’s situation. She didn’t want such an outstanding person to be dragged into her mess for no reason.

“Mingshu, did you not like the monk fruit tea?” Shen Junlan asked, looking at the drink that Yan Mingshu hadn’t even taken a sip of.

Yan Mingshu froze, her mind going blank. The heartfelt speech she had prepared was scattered by Professor Shen’s single question. She looked up in confusion, meeting the professor’s apologetic and gentle eyes.

“I’m sorry, I should have asked what you prefer first.”

Yan Mingshu swallowed. Her sore throat suddenly felt soothed.

With her speech center in disarray, Yan Mingshu responded with action. She picked up the liquid, which looked like pale brown sugar water, and took a sip. It was sweet and tasted better than she had expected, with no hint of a medicinal flavor.

Yan Mingshu’s throat immediately felt much better. She was about to try to find the words to explain everything again. She knew Professor Shen was a perfect partner, but she also knew she wasn’t worthy of her.

“Professor Shen.”

“Mingshu.”

They both spoke at the same time.

Shen Junlan smiled gently and deferred to her. “Mingshu, you go first.”

“No, Professor Shen, you go first. I haven’t figured out what to say yet,” Yan Mingshu said, sitting up straight with a formal expression, as if she were a student waiting to be lectured. Her cheeks, for some reason, were now flushed.

Shen Junlan’s gentle smile lingered. “Then I’ll be direct. Mingshu, I think you would make a very suitable wife for me.”

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