A Guide to Raising the Straight Long Aotian - Chapter 1

“Buzz! Buzz! Buzz-buzz-buzz-buzz!”

The frantic vibration of his phone jolted Wen Zui from a beautiful dream. Guided by instinct, he fumbled for the cold device and pressed the answer button.

“Your delivery!”

The courier’s impatient voice crackled through the receiver. “I’ve called you ten times already! Do you want this package or not? Don’t hold me up from my next stop!”

“I’m busy enough as it is.”

Wen Zui did not react much to the courier’s muttered grumbling. Last night was Double Eleven. Being extremely poor, he had stayed up all night hunting for deals and only fell asleep at daybreak. His brain was still a fog.

Rubbing his eyes, he pulled on a heavy cotton coat and opened the door.

“I will take it, thanks.”

The courier stood at the door, shivering against the biting wind. Hearing Wen Zui, he looked up irritably but froze instantly.

The handsome man before him had vivid, striking features, like a thick morning mist in the depths of winter. His appearance was so impactful it felt utterly out of place in this dilapidated, rusting tenement, as if he had wandered onto the wrong movie set.

So what if he is handsome? He still lives in a dump like this. He is worse off than me!

Resentment flared in the courier’s heart. He gritted his teeth, hiding his jealousy, but moved quickly to shove the package into Wen Zui’s hands.

“Sign for it.”

Wen Zui signed subconsciously. It was not until the courier had headed downstairs that he realized the item in his hand did not feel like the tissues or laundry detergent he had ordered yesterday.

It was light, about the size of a tissue box, yet it felt strangely heavy, as if it had traveled from some remote corner across half of Country H. It carried a faint, fresh scent of shrubbery.

Wen Zui rubbed his eyes and glanced at the shipping label, confirming it was indeed his name.

Strange.

Before he could think further, sleepiness surged back. He tossed the package by the door, wrapped himself tightly in his thick duvet once more, and sank back into a dream.

The room fell into silence.

“Thump!”

Suddenly, the delivery box gave a violent lurch!

The next second, the ethereal blue shadow of a snake appeared instantly in Wen Zui’s cramped rental room.

“System, is this my mission target?”

“Yes, Host! Start your mission quickly! The death countdown is only ten days away!”

A small silver sphere spoke in the air, its tone light and lively.

“A ghost marriage.”

Yun Qi pondered. With a flash, his figure dove into Wen Zui’s mind.

There, he saw Wen Zui lying on a mountain of gold. His eyes were crinkled shut with joy as he happily counted money. The melancholy aura he possessed earlier was instantly washed away by the scent of wealth, leaving behind only the vibe of a total loser.

Yun Qi’s lip twitched slightly in distaste. His gaze drifted over Wen Zui’s pert backside as he spoke:

“System, is he really the Long Aotian protagonist from the original book? The one who marries five wives, fathers a hundred children, and causes a global population explosion?”

Silver light flickered, and the cute little silver ball appeared.

“That is right, Host! As long as you get this protagonist into a ghost marriage with you and eliminate any chance of him becoming a playboy, you can be resurrected and return to your cultivation path!”

“And later, of course, you will break him up with those five wives so the protagonist stays in a pure one-on-one love!”

Yun Qi looked thoughtful. With a shake of his body, he transformed from a blue snake back into his original form and drifted leisurely toward Wen Zui.

In his dream, a figure more dazzling than gold suddenly appeared. Wen Zui looked up blankly, seeing a man of peerless nobility with silver hair and golden eyes. The man’s features were blurred, but his extraordinary aura marked him as someone of immense power.

“You, who are you?”

Wen Zui was so startled he dropped a gold coin.

Where did this beauty come from? I never have these kinds of unhealthy dreams!

Seeing Wen Zui staring at him without blinking, Yun Qi smiled slightly. “I am Yun Qi, the last descendant of an ancient cultivation clan. Moved by your kindness, I am willing to pass my life’s learning to you. Are you willing?”

“I am! I am!”

Wen Zui’s narrow eyes widened. He nodded repeatedly, agreeing without a second thought.

“Then go open the package at the door.”

Before the words finished, the golden room collapsed. A murderous phone notification rang out, effectively kicking Yun Qi out of Wen Zui’s mind.

“Wen Zui! Have you finished the revisions for the client’s proposal? You are already so incompetent, and yet you do not even have the initiative to work overtime!”

A roaring, scolding female voice erupted from the phone. Like a mouse seeing a cat, Wen Zui hurriedly threw on his clothes, splashed his face with freezing water to wake up, and rushed out the door so fast that Yun Qi did not even have time to react.

“He runs fast, at least. That is a bit like a Child of Fortune,” Yun Qi remarked indifferently, not taking the setback to heart.

But as the sky grew darker and Wen Zui still had not returned, he could no longer maintain his profound, mysterious facade.

“System, what is this 996 work culture? Why is it more exhausting than my cultivation?”

An embarrassed expression appeared on the little silver ball’s face.

“996 is exhausting? I am a CP-Breaking System working twenty-four hours a day! Does anyone feel sorry for this System Lord?!”

After fuming internally for a while, the system remembered how brutal this Host was when they first met. It shivered and swallowed its complaints.

In a tragic tone, as if its mother-system had just died, it said: “According to my predictions, the male lead is returning shortly. Please be patient, Great Host.”

Sure enough, as soon as the System finished, the sound of trudging footsteps appeared outside the thin door.

With a creak, the door opened. Wen Zui entered, bringing with him a chill that felt like it came from hell. He did not even turn on the light. He stripped as he walked, and within seconds, he had bundled himself back up and drifted into sleep.

Yun Qi glanced at the silver ball, then appeared directly above Wen Zui. His gaze traced down the man’s face like venom, but he said nothing.

The System trembled, metaphorically wiping sweat that did not exist. “Work is just too tiring, it is understandable.”

The room became silent, save for Wen Zui’s steady breathing. Yun Qi flew behind him, his blue snake shadow projecting an intense coldness. Wen Zui, who had looked relaxed, suddenly frowned and pulled his duvet tighter.

Monday

As the alarm blared, Wen Zui’s eyes snapped open.

He moved like a zombie through his morning routine. Despite it being a minus twenty-degree winter, he still used cold water. Soon, he had readied himself and headed out under the starlight.

As the north wind howled down his neck, a faint blue viper tattoo could be seen on the back of his neck, staring unblinkingly at him.

After a one-hour electric bike ride, Wen Zui took off his white rabbit-fur earmuffs and walked into the office. The moment he entered, the warmth hit him. He took a few deep breaths, sat down, slowly put on his glasses, and turned on his computer.

He opened a PSD file at random, grabbed a large thermos, skillfully filled it with hot water, and fetched two eggs and a plate of dumplings from the breakroom kitchen. He ate rapidly.

As the last dumpling went down, the office door swung open. The clack of high heels approached.

“Wen Zui? You are still here eating breakfast? The client is still unsatisfied with your designs, do you know that? Revise them again!”

The woman, with her bright red lips, barked orders at him.

Accustomed to this, everyone else in the office acted as if they had not heard a thing, continuing their heated discussions on project progress. Wen Zui’s right hand tightened on his mouse, then slowly relaxed.

“Alright, Sister Mei. I will send the twenty-first version to your inbox shortly.”

“Do not just send it to my inbox! When it is done, come to my office and report!”

Leaving those words, the woman stomped into her private office and slammed the door with a deafening bang.

Wen Zui glared at the woman’s door, his face full of resentment. The dark circles under his eyes looked like he was ready to audition as a panda at the zoo.

He finished the changes quickly and walked to her door with his laptop.

“Knock, knock, knock.”

“Sister Mei, it is revised.”

He stood there for several seconds before her indifferent voice drifted out.

“Come in. Leave the door open so everyone can see what kind of garbage you have drawn.”

It was a routine report. Wen Zui explained the changes and stood aside, not daring to speak.

The woman did not seem to listen at all. She impatiently took a photo of the screen, forwarded the design to the client, and then ignored Wen Zui, scrolling through her phone as if he were air.

A moment later, a message notification saved him.

The woman looked up slowly, a smile spreading across her face. She nodded and said, “Fine, you can go back. The client ultimately decided on the first version.”

Damn it!

Fury exploded in Wen Zui’s mind. He had pulled all-nighters for a week and worked through the weekend, only for them to pick the first version!

Stupid client! Stupid boss!

“What did you say? Wen Zui, do you not want this job anymore?!”

Wen Zui froze. He looked up to see his boss in a towering rage. She was slamming the table, her face flushed red like a fire-breathing dinosaur looking to tear him apart.

What is happening? Did I say that out loud?

The noisy office went dead silent. It was so quiet you could hear the drip of the old water dispenser. Everyone stared at the small office with varying expressions.

Wen Zui caught a glimpse of an admiring look from a colleague. His eyes widened. He tried to say something to salvage the situation, but his body would not obey. He picked up his laptop and smashed it to pieces.

“Fine, Wen Zui! You have got guts! Once you walk out that door, do not you dare come back crying to me!”

The female supervisor was shaking with rage, her face turning pale. “You are the first person who has dared to speak to me like that! Get out! Do not expect a single cent of your three months’ salary!”

Before she could finish, the entire office seemed to freeze. An immense pressure, heavy as a mountain, slammed onto her shoulders. With a thud, she was forced to her knees. She could not utter another biting word, only gasp for breath in humiliation.

She thought she saw a mysterious blue light flash in Wen Zui’s eyes, and a cold, heartless voice echoed in her ear.

Whatever was said made the woman tremble violently. After a long moment, she began to nod frantically, making Wen Zui wonder if she had been possessed.

Eventually, Wen Zui blinked his aching eyes and regained control of his body.

Before he could apologize to save face, the supervisor did an about-face. She smiled at him with fawning intensity, though her expression still held a hint of suppressed anger.

“Xiao Wen, your designs are so good. It is a waste of your talent here. I am giving you a promotion immediately! Is thirty thousand a month enough? A hundred thousand project bonus will be in your account this afternoon. Go home and sleep. I am giving you three days off, no, five days! Look how tired you are.”

“I will personally see you out. Go rest.”

The moment they stepped out, the office erupted in gossip.

“My god, is the She-Devil possessed?”

“That penny-pincher actually gave Wen Zui such a huge raise? Is there hope for us too?”

“Is Sister Mei a masochist? Maybe you should try cursing at her this afternoon?”

“No way! You go, I would not dare.”

And mysteriously escorted out by his boss, Wen Zui stood by his electric bike in a daze for a long time. It was not a dream.

Has the sun risen in the west? Did the She-Devil change her nature? That is one hundred thousand yuan! That is more than his yearly salary!

“What? Are you not happy?”

A chilly voice rang out in Wen Zui’s mind, answering his thoughts.

“Who? Who is speaking? Did you control me just now?”

Wen Zui blinked rapidly, communicating with the voice internally.

“I am Yun Qi, the last descendant of an ancient cultivation clan.”

Ancient what?

Halfway through his thought, Wen Zui recalled the golden dream. The silver-haired beauty had said the same thing.

A gust of cold wind made him shrink his neck. He felt a sudden chill down his spine and frowned. He had read plenty of novels about protagonists gaining powers, but no magical mentor looked like that. Was this some kind of unlucky ghost encounter?

Thinking this, he planned to rush to a temple and get a protective talisman.

But the person in his head seemed to read his mind: “I am a cultivator, not some ghost.”

Wen Zui frowned, his eyes landing on a lottery shop.

“You say you are a cultivator? Tell me which scratch-off will win, and then I will believe you.”

“The protagonist’s love for money really never wavers,” the System remarked sarcastically.

Yun Qi glanced at it displeasedly. “Go check. My spiritual power is too low to do this myself.”

The System pouted but flew into the shop to scan.

“Go in. I will let you win a million today.”

Yun Qi’s tone was indifferent, as if he were talking about buying common vegetables.

Wen Zui’s mouth fell open. He marched into the shop and, under Yun Qi’s guidance, bought a red scratch-off.

“Thump! Thump! Thump!”

His heart felt like it would leap out of his throat. His hand shook as he scraped. His eyes nearly popped out.

It really was a million!

The shop assistant had been dozing off, and other customers were focused on their own tickets, but Wen Zui’s shout of joy grabbed everyone’s attention.

“Gosh! You are so lucky!”

“Damn! This pretty boy is set!”

“Why was it not me?”

After quickly redeeming the prize, Wen Zui felt like he was walking on air. He made it back to his rental and collapsed onto the bed with a thud.

He could not stop giggling.

Yun Qi sneered internally, preparing for the next step. What an idiot.

“How about it? Do you believe me now? Hurry up and open the delivery.”

Wen Zui heard him and paused, but he showed no sign of moving.

“Do you think I am stupid? One look at you and I can tell you are not from a proper sect. You are probably just some wandering ghost!”